Anyone with a 7 Y/o Daughter???

I know where you are coming from. My daughter is 9 now and i still have hope the sassiness will go away. And to some extent it is better. You just have to be persistent and demand the respect you deserve. And when she disrespects you tell her its not alright to talk to you like that.And reinforce it with timeout (or something to that effect) And trust it will get better. This will not last forever. (or atleast thats what i tell myself) Hope this helps... Good Luck :)

my daughter is the same but doesn't sass- I am very lucky- I think she did once and I told her that she needs to treat me with the same respect she would her teacher or principal and they understand that! They know they wouldn't get away with that at school and just explain to her how hard you work for them and that you don't mind doing it because you love them but that you would appreciate some respect- that worked with my daughter too- when she won't pick up her stuff. As far as the whining- oh boy.. I just do it right back at her and she sees how annoying it is LOL Just whine when you talk to her and she'll get the idea hopefully!

omg!! my daughter turns 7 in june.she is the first of 3 and i was able to stay at home with her for the first 3 yrs.she is so sassy as well.she is so good at school and at grandma's but as soon as we get into the car to go home she starts to act up!!it's like she's been good all day and can't take it anymore and has to get her badness out.she debates w me all the time.i dont realize it at the time but my sister or mom will point it out.i'm trying to get her to just say ok mommy when i tell her to do something, not go back and forth w me.its an effort on my part because she has gotten away w so much.mostly due to the fact that i'm just too tired to handle it.when we are doing something together i will ask her why she talks to me that way.i tell her that makes mommy sad and i don't like it.she will just say i dont' know why and start to cry. she is also very emotional.she cries so easily about things-good lord..i just try to be on top of things more and point out her sass to her and how she sounds.i tell her what do u think your teacher would say if she heard u talking like that.just gotta really be on top of them and remind thetm to be respectful to you.

To K.,
My daughter is 8 now but she still can be sassy at times. I see it as her way of being independent, shes growing and you need lots of patience and remember it will get better. Its a phase but just like the terrible twos she will eventually stop sassing you. Be firm and remind her that you love her very much but you will not allow her to talk to you this way if she wants to be heard. And be a team with your husband make sure she knows that you both agree on this. And in time you will see a big difference. My daughter has pretty much stopped but every once in awhile I have to remind her.
S.

Hi. I am right there with you. However, i have to disagree with some other responses here.
Here's my opinion: If you demand respect from your daughter, you will only breed animosity from her in the future. Respect is something that should be completely earned. Now, I'm not saying you don't deserve respect or that you are not doing things that earn respect. All I'm asking you to do is think about a person YOU respect. Let's say it's a best friend as an example. I am willing to bet that she never demanded for you to respect her right? The reason you respect her is she is a good person, polite, always there for you, teaches you things, is a overall good person right? So, take this example and reflect on it for your daughter. Only by continually being a person who she can respect will you achieve that status in her mind. You do not have the right to demand anything from her.
Listen, she's 7. she's just starting to realize that her actions can and will shape the world around her. She's still pushing buttons, she's still trying to boss. It's her way of figuring out her place in the world. We can't take it personally, we can only present guidelines. She's realizing that she's STUCK. Think of it, she can't really be a baby anymore and she certainly can't even go to the store by herself so she's stuck in an age where she doesn't know what direction to go in (baby or adult). When she whines, she's trying to revert back to toddler because she still feels small. when she bosses, she's testing the water of not needing you anymore because she's realizing she's getting bigger. She is stuck between the two and just trying to cope. Gradually, these ends of the spectrum will come closer and weigh more heavily on the independent side.
I've come to learn that if i keep getting my feelings hurt and taking her struggles personally, i end up with feeling like all her shortcomings are my fault, im not a good mom, she takes advantage of me, she doesn't respect me, i do so much for her, etc etc etc.

There are a few things you should do. And again, it's just my opinion.
1. don't EVER guilt trip her into respect. She knows darn well all the things you do for her. She know she can't make it alone. and guess what... she probably won't thank you until she has her own kids and realizes just how stinkin' hard it is. that's just the truth of it. Did you ever actually thank your mom tenfold for the things she did for you growing up?
2. Continually put you foot down when she gets sassy. Not punishing, just reminding her of how to act. An easy, hands off way that totally works is: "We don't talk to each other like that in this house. We talk to each other like we love each other and you can leave the room until you are ready to talk to me in a respectful way." period. don't engage. don't rationalize. just say it and demand calmly that she leaves. over and over and over. it will work. promise.
3. Allow her more freedom. this sound scary but it's totally effective. My daughter packs her own lunch for school. She gets herself up. Dresses herself. Makes her own eggos. Combs her own hair. Brushes her teeth. Then when she finishes, she gets how own "free choice" until it's time to go. This accomplishes three things:
1. I actually have time to get myself ready in the morning!
2. she has come to terms that the world doesn't revolve around her and there are other people in the house who have needs in the morning too... therefore taking away any whine power!
3. and lastly, on the days that I do her hair, lay out her clothes and pack a special lunch, SHE TOTALLY APPRECIATES IT! and thanks me for helping her because she understands what it's like to have to get all these things done.
When she becomes more responsible for herself and realizes just how tough it is to take care of herself, she will gain more respect for the energy you put into it.
Now, Aria hugs me and says thanks when i bring her laundry in her room (she's responsible for putting it away), fix her dinner, take her shopping, etc. And now she'll say to me, "I've got my stuff done for school mom, you go get ready and Im going to watch pbs until you are ready to go." sounds too good to be true but it really does happen.
It really works. but not all girls are the same. i hope some of this works for you.
Don't get too caught up mom, we've got a LONG way to go before their outta the house and we haven't even gotten to the adolescent years (God help us! :) )
Don't forget that we're just here to help them survive on their own when it's time. The quicker we prepare them to be independently successful, the quicker we push through all these tough phases.
take care, and good luck!

S. L