Any Advice on How to Get in the Mood More?

I'm very interested to hear your responses. I don't like the idea of hormone replacements, maybe it's different with a hysterectomy but in general i don't think i want to put stuff like that in my body.
My suggestion was the K-Y lubricants. Honestly i haven't tried them but probably part of "getting in the mood" is deciding you are just going to do it because it's a good way to show hubby you care about him and if the K-Y helps you enjoy it more then you and hubby both win.
I just read Dr Laura's book "The proper care and feeding of husbands". I'm not sure i would recommend the book but one part of it was interesting, They quoted a man that compared being denied sex to being denied food. something like if they aren't getting anything they think about it all the time and want it all the time etc. but if they are getting "it" regularly they won't be chasing you around the house trying to devour you, because they are content.
I personally find that i'm only interested in sex the first week after my period is over, after that i couldn't care less. I've wondered often if i'm alone in feeling this. Lately i've been trying to get into it more through out the month just because i know it is important to hubby and I love him and want to make him happy, usually once i get going it's fun.

Here is what I have found. Intimacy is not a seperate entity from the other parts of your relationship. It can actually be an indicator of how the rest of your relationship and you personally are doing.

Something my husband and I have always done is keep complete lines of communication open in this area. Next we have both communicated our needs to each other in every area, emotionally, sexually, intellectually etc.

Working on intimacy doesn't start by working on intimacy! It starts by looking at your life and saying what can I do to change my life so I have less stress? What do I need my partner to do to help reduce the stress in my life? Am I meeting the other needs of my spouse and what are they?

You need to find out what makes your husband feel special nad loved. He also needs to hear what makes you feel special and loved. Do you need more help around the house?

I've also found that I need emotional intimacy. I need time to talk together with out any sexual touching. I need him to hold my hand and give me a hug.

I have also talked to him extensively to understand how he feels about intimacy and why it is so hard when I refuse him. We have come to an understanding that he will not put pressure on me and realize when I say no it means "I do love him but I am so overwhelmed and exhausted right now" and he will support me and help me out.

I also try to understand that for him love is very physical and has a lot to do with touch and that doesn't mean hes a pervert! I try to be understanding of his needs and if I can I sacrifice my own feelings and consent.

Communicate about what makes you comfortable and uncomfortable and remember that for you, intimacy is emotional first then physical last for them its physical first, emotional last.

Also your own thoughts about yourself can affect your relationship. Do you love yourself? How concerned are you about the appearance of your body? Can you learn to feel good about yourself no matter what you look like because you are a loving mother and wife and that is what matters most?

Good luck and be patient with one another.

Schedule an apt with your GYN. He/she may be able to evaluate your hormone levels with a blood test. Discuss the risk of stroke with your doctor - women who smoke are at risk, for non smokers, the risk is far less. Testosterone supplements may help.

Have you and your husband spoken about this and how you each feel? Start there then if you guys have a disagreement then maybe counceling is necessary. But start by talking to him, you may be able to work it out there. Good luck!

I hope you have found your stride with some of the fantastic advice from other ladies responses...however if you still are finding yourself in need of help, feel free to contact me. I believe I can help, you see I'm a romance specialist and help women like you all the time. If you'd rather look at my romance enhacing product line you can view it with your hunnie at www.slumberpartiesbyjaimelynnkohler.com . Either way I'm here for you if you'd like some new ideas, enjoy !

There are herbs and plants that can be aids to getting back to an interested place.

good luck.

I understand the children can steal a lot of your time. You need to set time aside for you. Run you a bath and add some bubbles, soft music, glass of wine of sparkling juice if you don't drink and some candles. This will help you release some of your energy. Try some Romantatherpy bath products. They will help release some endorphines.

Once you have finished with your bath, apply some romantatherpy body products. Give your hubby a massage, could be a foot or body massage and he can return the favor. This is a form of foreplay. Apply some edible products to your body and let him find where you applied them. Hide and Seek - play some foreplay games. You don't have to go straight to sexual intercourse.

Have a picnic in your bedroom where you can lock the children out so that you can concentrate on you and hubby solely. Rememeber what made you drawn to him in the first place, recapture those memories and reenact them.

Maybe you should try Pure Satisfaction Enhancement Gel it is a unisex gel that enhances your sexual drive. It is applied directly to the clitorial area. Also you can try some adult toys to help you find out where your hot spots are and what makes you say ahhh.

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talk to your doctor and check hormone levels.

talk to hubby, need to set romance time. Can't just turn it on.