Another Sleep Question!!

My son is 15 months old, and like you it was always really easy getting my son down for bed. But within the past few months, at least 3 or 4 nights a week my son fights going to bed. He also runs around the house and likes to much on things (though we try and limit this before bedtime. The nights that are "good nights' are usually the nights that he goes to bed earlier then usual (around 7:30). We make his bottle, brush his teeth, turn off all the lights and shut the doors and drink our milk, then go to bed.

Maybe he is over tires and needs to go to bed a little earlier (try 15 minutes) sometimes that makes all the difference. Or whenever my son is crying in his room b/c he doesn't want to go to bed i go and give him a hug, explain to him that I will see him in the morning, and I rub his belly (usually by then his eyes are fluttering b/c he's so tired).

If he's screaming (i know some parents will disagree with me), go in his room and sit down will he's laying down. maybe all he needs is company (sometimes nighttime is a lonely time)

Hope it helps

they go through phases where they don't need as much sleep just like they go through phases where they don't want to eat much.it usually goes along with growth spurts.when they are growing they eat more and sleep more.when they in between they often have less of an appetite and just need less sleep.until my kids had to be somewhere in the morning at a certain time(school) then i wasn't terribly strict about bedtimes.just like you can't force them to eat,you can't force them to sleep.i always waited til they were ready.they do go through seperation anxiety around this time too.maybe it's time to change the bedtime routine a little.try some milk which has taht hormone in it that makes you sleepy like turkey..tryptophan or something like that.also maybe add in some extra snuggle time before bed and maybe some exercise as well.i know a lot of people don't like to let their kids cry at bedtime,but sometimes that's what you have to do.my little girl is very stubborn and i tried a lot of things and finally i had to just let her cry it out and now she goes to bed with almost no problem.hopefully you will find something else that works though.just remember it's probably just a stage,so even if nothing you try seems to help,he will probably grow out of it in a few months.

Is he watching TV? TV is very stimulating and this could have something to do with it. Try sleepytime tea at dinner. Sounds like your hitting the terrible two's! Your going to have to get inventive. We had NO TV at all. Long bath. Sometimes taking a walk would help or going to the park and tiring them out first, then eat and to bed. No sugar or sweets because it revvs them up too much.

Good luck,
Deb

Dear M.,
A very similar thing happened with my son. I did not want him to cry either and I started laying down in his room with him until he feel asleep. This made me feel better. He then would drag his sleep time out longer and longer. I didn't like where this was going so my husband and I got strict. I decided to go back to the book I trust which is "Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child." Once my son figured out he was in control instead of us, he used it against us. I decided I wanted my peaceful evenings back so we did our regular routine. After dinner and bath, we placed my son in his crib for his cup of milk and read to him. (This way he can't escape!) When his stories were done, we turned off the light and said good night. He did cry, but it was for about 15 minutes. The next night was about 5 minutes and now he rarely cries. We go back in after a few minutes to check on him if he is crying to check his diaper and see if he wants more milk. It wasn't cruel at all. It is important for young children to sleep. Your son is probably just mad at you for "leaving him alone" when he would rather be up. Good luck. K.

I know exactly what you are going through. My daughter is 17mths old and started doing the same thing 1-2mths ago. I have never let her cry to sleep and I just can't do it. She use to only fuss about going to bed when she was sick or not feeling, now it is almost every night. When she starts crying as soon as I come in she is fine and reaches her arms out for me to let her out of the crib. She bangs at the bedroom door if I close it to try to get her to sleep and she could have us read her stories all night long. I have tried a few things and maybe one of them will work for you. I tried letting her go to bed a little later assuming that maybe she wasn't tired so early anymore (of course this was not my daughter's problem because then I would have to wake her up in the morning), or you can try putting him to bed early (once my daughter gets really tired she is a lot harder to put to bed). What works most of the time with my daughter is when we changed her bed time routine. We use to give her a bath, brush her teeth and read her a story now we do all of that but have added either stroller walk outside, or we let her walk outside with us or we all dance to the wiggles until she gets worn out. It appears that unlike most children our daughter needs to be worn out before she can go to bed and the dancing and running down the street always work. The problem is my husband thinks I am spoiling her by letting her make up the bedtime routine. Whenever we don't do one of those things, trust me within an hour of trying to get her to sleep I am outside walking with her. Good luck and hopefully you will find out what works for your son. I know a lot of people told me that at this age they experience separation anxiety and that is probably the problem with both your son and my daughter.

I love the Moms here! It's rare to find other Moms who refuse to let their children 'cry it out'. Being a mother of 5, I've experienced this with every one of my boys. It's almost as if the light bulb goes on in their heads that says, "Hey, I have some control here. I don't have to lay here. I can get up and run around." What I have found is that their need for sleep adjusts around this age and they simply aren't ready to go to sleep. It's always worked (for us) to just let them get up and try again in an hour. You do have to get firmer with each attempt, however, or it will backfire on you and they'll be up all night :).

If there is a bed in his room that you can lay on, I would suggest trying that. My son is just now 16 months old and he's gone through that. I finally figured out that he just didn't want Mommy and Daddy to leave him. So we would lay in the room with him until he was asleep (or so tired he didn't notice us leaving). After a few nights we would just lay down for a few minutes and get up and leave, occasionally checking on him so that he knew we were still around. It took about two weeks to get him back on track but it was worth it (and some nights we would fall asllep before Him and wake up quite rested!)
Another thing that helped my son was to give up my "lovey". I had a throw blanket that I've slept under for four years and I started noticing that when I would go check on my son, he'd have my blanket in bed w/ him (he sleeps in a pack-n-play beside our bed). Since the very first time he saw that I had stretched the blanket across his bed he would lay right down and snuggle up.
I hope one of these options is viable! They worked wonders for us!