My daughter is very active in our church and is finally old enough to be alter server and she has served a couple of times, but the church has no training for them. They are supposed to team the first timers up with the older kids and the older kids are supposed to show them what to do, but half the time the older kids don't show up and when they do they just do everything and don't show her what to do. My poor daughter is lost and does not know what to do and she is always upset when she gets up there in front of everyone and does not know what to do.
I tried talking to the religious ed director and all they say is that they will learn over time. Does anyone know of someplace I can go online that shows what an alter server is supposed to do so that I can have her watch it over and over and learn it. She does watch in church but sometimes she doesn't get the best view points and it is hard for her to take that one instance and then apply it much later. If I can have her continuously watch it and practice at home that would help her so much.
I did not grow up catholic so I was never an alter server, and my husband did grow up catholic but he never served either.
Any suggestions of websites that show the duties would be appreciated. I have found some that list them, but I was hoping for something she could watch.
She does go to church every week, but you can't sit in the first 5 rows and she can almost never see clearly all the servers spots. We usually have 3 servers but like I said sometimes not all of them show up, therefore the duties change because they are now split by the remaining servers.
I am a little miffed at the lack of training and lack of support they seem to lack there. There is a catholic school with our parish but she does not go there, and maybe that is why they don't do a separate training, maybe they do it in school so the public school kids don't get the same. She loves to do it, but she gets so lost up there I feel bad for her.
Thank you Laura that is what I needed.
ETA: Most of the servers are girls in our parish so I don't think that is it. I honestly think no one wants to be in charge of it and our priest is not young anymore and I think he just does not have the stamina.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E8bV6RVNaMk
I found this on youtube. Looks like a step by step. Off on the right side it has a bunch more videos you can watch about alter servers. Good Luck!
L.
wow that is awful. my daughter is an alter server and they go through very specific training before they are even allowed to serve. she does go to the private school affiliated with the church but she serves with children that do not go to the school and they are also trained. i would maybe call another catholic church in your area and explain the situation and go from there. good luck to you
Okay their idea of on the job training does not sound very 'cool'. I have been Catholic all my life yet I would have no idea where to begin and end with altar serving. It doesn't sound like you're going to get any support from this parish. Is it possible to call a neighboring parish and see what training they offer and maybe offer to pay a fee for her to get what she needs? Around here churches are a dime a dozen so I would call around until you get the answer you want to hear. Good luck!
Have you tried going to the priest? Maybe he can help you.
It's a shame that they don't have training and that the religious ed director is not willing to offer any training or help. She's lucky she can get anyone to do it. Our parish has a training class for 5th graders before they can start serving. Try Googling Altar Server Training. I saw a few websites that might be helpful, although I'm sure each parish has it's own way of doing things.
When I was an alter server, we had a few practice run throughs with the priest before we served an actual mass. If I were you, I would go talk to the priest since the religious ed teacher gave you no help. If that doesn't work, perhaps you can go "shopping" for another parish in your area. We went to three churches near us before we found the right parish. Our daughter isn't old enough to be an alter server (right now she's scared of the candles) but so far the religious ed people have been excellent, so hopefully they still will be when the time comes.
I grew up in a parish that was very by-the-book, so there was actually intensive altar server training. Since your parish doesn't have that, I'd make it a point over the next several weeks to sit in the first row at Mass so she can have the best view possible. Have her observe the role of the server that she'd actually play, so she's not focusing too much on the other(s).
ETA: Since she can't sit any closer, maybe you can get permission for her to be up on the altar for a few weeks, without actually doing anything (maybe just carry the cross during the processional/recessional), and then she can really see what's going on. Ask them to not schedule her for a month or so while she learns on the altar, as an extra body.
Is there a Catholic School near by? That is where we were given a chance to learn what to do. You could call their religious ed director and see what resources they have or even if she could practice with them.
hmmm atleast she;s not getting pulled in the back room=)
ehhh too far?
i went to catholic school k-college. my brother was an alter boy and he jsut showed up and caught on eventually. gong to church weekly will help
Sorry, got to say it. . .Do you suspect that the priests or other servers are intentionally trying to make it difficult for her because she's a girl? I hope not. I know that girls have been doing it for 30 years, but you never know.
I'd shop around for a parish that does train the servers. Then I'd take a good look at the church and see if their other activities are also well planned. Could be a sign.
Unfortunately, I don't have any resources for you, but just thought you should know that it seems a little odd that they don;t have a formal training. My son expressed interest in serving just after a training andnow has to wait 4 months until the next one in order to serve. I wonder if you can contact nearby parishes and ask if your daughter can attend one of their trainings.
It all depends on the parish, sorry. Some parishes don't use servers at all, others have two. Pretty much where they sit is obvious, what they do is not. Some parishes have the bells that must be run with the body and again the blood, unless your parish doesn't do that. There are times they move the books, sometimes not. Some the servers receive the gifts, others the priest receives the hosts and the servers the wine....
I hope you get the idea, there is no one answer. Try to go to mass when she is not serving and pay close attention.
Oh, in our parish you must be trained or you cannot serve but apparently that varies as well.
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Of course every kid wants to serve because you get pulled out of class to do funeral masses and get paid 15 bucks! Seriously unfair in my kids school since grandpa owned the funeral home. :p
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Oh yeah, if you don't go to the school good luck! I was PSR and talk about red headed step child! My older two went to the parish school, much different.
Have you actually asked the parish priest himself? not other kids? Does your daughter go to the parish school? A lot of times the kids in school get training as they go to mass during the week. Our parish has a training session once a year and the kids have to go to learn what to do. I would make an appt with the priest if this is important to her. A training video would be great but different priests like things different ways as far as how things are given to him etc. and then removed after mass.
