Almost 4, Still Won't Do Number Two on the Toilet

Well, this is what my daughter did with my grandson (very high-functioning autistic). He is 4 1/2 now and this was a little over a year ago. He could read. Anyway, first she made him a laminated "book" complete with photos of him and the toilet and a story reminding him that the potty is the place to poop, even when he wanted to play or whatever.... then she made signs which she placed at his eye level all over the main level of the house. They said things like POOP IN THE POTTY, SIT ON THE TOILET TO POOP, POOP GOES IN THE POTTY, and any variation of that, accompanied by drawings of toilets with arrows pointing to the bowl.

You could use a little Miralax everyday to make sure she doesn't et constipated and too backed up. It's over the counter and the dr told me it isn't habit forming.

Your question is tough. Being aspie I would see if there is any books about aspies and potty training. I also would talk to your doctor. Who identified her as aspie? CAn they recommend anything? There are organizations and support groups for families of aspies. I would talk to them especially with your daughter's other behaviors. I would be careful using advice from families of typical kids. Until you have had a kid like that you don;t understand that some people are wired differently. Good luck to you.

does she have friends who are around her age that might help if she knows that her friends are using the potty this might encourage her to try it S.

With my now 6 year old,we had issues with her wanting to use pull-up's as diapers. She knew she could go in them and not dirty her clothes.

I don't know if what we did will work for you, but I'll let you know just in case. First, We instilled a "potty first" rule. Any time she wanted to do something different (change activities, wanted something to drink, wanted a snack, whatever), she had to "potty first". That way, whatever she wanted to do was the reward.

The other thing we did was to let her outgrow the pull-ups, and quit buying the next bigger size. Soon enough, she started asking for her "big girl pants" because the "dora pants" were uncomfortable. I told her that she could wear the "big girl pants", but that meant that when she woke up in the middle of the night and had to go potty, that she had to actually get up and use the potty. She said, "I use YOUR potty..." I told her I didn't care which potty she used, as long as she went potty. And that was that - she never looked back.

FOr what it's worth - and good luck!

Try a reward system. I just got my 3 year old sone to stopp pooping in his pul=up by giving him a treat in the beginining of his "pooping in the potty". Soon after he stopped asking for the treats and goes on his own now.

Oh my this sounds soooo familar my now 21 year old was the exact same. I did everything to get her to go on the toilet then one day I said fine "if you poop in your pants you clean it up" after three or four times of cleaning herself ( I did have my own mess to clean up after her) she got sick of the mess and started going to the bathroom all by herself.
Like I said she's 21 now and she remembers this and laughs that if I hadn't done that she probalby would have started kdg in diapers. Don't stress about it and don't stress her out either she will go eventually you know even 4 year olds give in to peer presure. Just focus on all her wonderful other qualitys. Good luck and remember to enjoy everything because it really does go by way to fast.

I totally agree about having her clean herself up. However, my dd was scared to poop in the potty, for some reason, and would hold it in until it hurt. Finally, when I had to go, I brought her into the bathroom with me a couple of times to show her it wouldnt hurt/wasnt scary. After 2 times in with me, she decided on her own that she wanted to go on the potty. I dont know if that will help in your case, but good luck!!

i agree with debbie. i have potty trained many, many, many kids. with the stubborn ones, i find that it almost always works best to just say, "ok, well, when you are a big girl now, even if you dont want to use the potty. Big girls clean up after themselves. So now you either have to go potty, or clean up the poop and throw away your clothes and undies" in my experience, once kids have to clean themselves up and realize how much of a pain in the butt it is, rather then just pooping on the potty, then are suddenly very involved! lol.