Hi ladies! OK, I know the "terribly 2's" are on me but I didn't go through this with my daughter so any thoughts or suggestions would be greatly appreciated. My son will be 2 at the end of next month and he is constanting swiping/hitting at thing, people, animals.. you name it. If it is something that he doesn't want to do or something that he doesn't agree with her will take a swing at you or throw himself on the floor and start kicking. We do timeouts but that doesn't seem to be working. We always take him away from the situation but it is really hard to keep him in timeout. He just walks out. We put him back and it all happens over and over. So, that isn't working. Does anyone have any suggestions that worked for you when you had this situation? As I was typing this I thought of a fence thing we have... what if I set that up and that is where time out started being? Would that work? ANY SUGGESTIONS AT ALL would be great appreciated!! THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH.
L.: I've answered a couple of posts which I think would answer your questions perfectly. Please check out my responses to these posts. I hope these will help.
First: http://www.mamasource.com/request/500359827516555265
And second: http://www.mamasource.com/request/8929072352340213761
Hope these ones help. I tend to use some unconventional techniques, but they do work.
Luck!
C
Just gotta be firm and constant. Look him deep in the eyes and w/o yelling, firmly tell him no. Be consistent and before ya know it he'll stop.
Time to figure out the underlying issues! What are your son's triggers, what is he trying to do, & what does he want? A couple days of close observation, not you intefering, just observing their interactions....& I believe you'll see some answers. Once you do your homework, then I know you'll see the path to follow. I truly believe that with all situations....we just need to observe & be proactive....rather than reactive, especially with punishment for children!
That said, if he won't stay in time-out....then use a timer! Restart it everytime he gets up...or use another method to discipline him for not listening to you. BUT, please get control now....before you're ready to pull your hair out! I wish you Peace.
I know how hard this can be. I have three boys under age five. Timeouts work but you have to me consistent and follow thru. With my boys if they came out of time out before it was done they had to start all over again. The first few times took almost an hour but eventually they learned that they were not going to get out of it. I also count to 3 before we go to time out so they have a chance to correct the behavior on their own. I say "I'm going to count to 3" "that's 1" wait a few seconds, "that's 2" wait again, "that's 3 now you have to have a time out". Now I only have to count most of the time for them to stop whatever they are doing. Hang in their. He is just testing his boundaries. Be firm and don't give in.
I second Kim's post. Our 2 yr old throws pretty violent tantrums. She throws things, kicks and screams and rolls around the floor. When the throwing and kicking start, I put her in time out. When she was a little smaller (say 6 months ago), she would sit there and cry. Now she gets up, or will roll across the room. I have to put her back every time and tell her we have to start time out over and she can't move out of that spot until the timer rings. It's SOOO frustrating. But I know I need to be consistent. If the time out is due to her doing something she's not supposed to, I do count to 3, too. Most of the time she stops after 1 or 2. But if I make it to 3, she goes straight to time out. It does seem to help because she knows I mean business. Good luck!
My daughter has had some issues with hitting, but mostly when she gets upset or doesn't get what she wants. I kindly tell her "Hands are for hugging and helping, not hitting" and remove her from the situation. Sometimes all that means is putting her down onto the floor (and not in my lap any longer).
Maybe your son is trying to express himself and he can't so he's using agression. After explaining why you don't hit, ask him a question such as "Is there something you want?" or explain that you understand "I realize you are upset/frustrated because you can't have this or that or do this or that but we can maybe play with it later (or go to the park later, etc)." Not that they understand your reasoning, but at least you are not just saying "Because I said so!"
For kicking, I would do the same thing "Legs are for running and jumping!! Let's see how fast you can run!" Then explain to him that it's not nice to kick other people because it hurts them. Don't expect him to understand it, and he probably will go back to doing it again if he gets upset.
Praise him when you see him doing something nice "Ohhh I like how you are being gentle with the doggie." or "I see you are playing nicely with so and so...it's nice to have friends and not hit or kick!"
Good luck!!
