Allowance Questions - McKinney,TX

We tried this. As my kids would say "Epic Fail". The plan was if they did all their chores, as well as a few extras they would get paid. It failed because we didn't have a detailed plan layed out, everyone's definition of chores was different. I have very little cash on hand, hubby has big bills, then we would forget.

For me what worked much better was just paying for some of the little things that they wanted or paying when they wanted to go to an event. I completely agree that children should have some of their own money to spend and save. My children often receive monetary gifts for birthdays, etc, which they manage.

I haven't read the other responses so I hope I'm not duplicating here.

I'm currently attending Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University, and he has an excellent program called Financial Peace University Jr.

He teaches that you should NEVER give your kids an allowance, instead, make them work for commission. Hang a chart on the fridge that tells them what chores are worth how much, and when they do the chore, they get the amount, immediately. In addition to that, they have regular responsibilities that they do NOT get paid for. This teaches them responsibility and integrity- as adults, we have to do things every day that we do not get paid for.

We will be starting this with our girls very soon. Good luck!

I second financial peace jr.!

First you need to decide what your purpose for giving an allowance is. Some tie the allowance to chores. If you do perform certain chores then you receive so much money. We don't take that approach. Our approach is that chores/helping are part of being a family and no one gets paid for that. It's a difference in philosophy, so you need to first decide what is your philosophy. For us allowance is their age in dollars every month. They pay for Christmas and birthday presents for each other (we have four kids). Certain toys they want I will tell them they can pay for them, other toys I will pay. My youngest loved legos. Periodically I would buy him one of the big Lego sets. He loved putting it together, got so much pleasure in it, and I enjoyed his enjoyment. But I wouldn't do this every time he asked. When the got to Jr. High they get 1 1/2 times their age monthly. Now they have to pay for going to the movies and other outside entertainment. In High School they negotiate with their father about how much money they should get per month. In High School they pay for all outside food, entertainment, presents for friends and family, clothes, gas, and car
maintainence. (I can't remember if car insurance is in there as well). Any damage to the car or tickets they pay. The negotiation part is where they have to think about how much things cost and what my husband thinks is reasonable. It's interesting to see how differently each child approaches this and where the individual child's priorities are. If they run out of money during the month, too bad. They don't get more. They amount they get is reasonable, but if they want a lot more stuff or to do a lot more things they need to get a job. I have been working since 16 and my husband since 13, so we do expect them to work. In our opinion we are teaching the kids how to manage money, which is the most important part. It's difficult at times for the kids because so many kids get money freely from their parents. We are fortunate to live in a wealthy area so many assume that they get whatever they want, so not true. I tell the kids I know it's hard, but they are learning about money now. Their friends will learn later and it will be harder because they have gotten use to having so much money and don't know how to manage the money. My husband transfers the money to the kid's account every month. The kid has an ATM card. My husband can see all their purchases and see the balance. So actually we are more informed about how they spend their money than my parents were about us.

I say to my kid all the time. Her job is going to school, getting good grades, doing homework, keeping her room clean, and bed made. My job is to go to work to make the money that pays the bills. As long as she does this if she wants to go to the movies or go somewhere with her friends I'll give her a few bucks. When she hits teenage status same will be required and I will give her a few bucks for same. When its time for her to have a car though. She will need to get a job to pay the car insurance and put gas in the car as well as still keep going to school, getting good grades, doing homework, keep her room clean etc. I will still give her money if she wants to go to the movies etc. Her priority should always be the school and good grades.

We tried it with my oldest two and as Momof2girls says "Epic Fail".

THey get enough at birthdays, Christmas, Valentines' Day, Every Hallmark Holiday my mom and MIL send the kids money. Plus the girls babysit.

I just can't seem to remember, then get far behind, never have the cash. I found it to be not worth my time or energy.

My dad generally gave us a dollar on Friday (started in grade school because we had 'popcorn Fridays' where the school sold bags of popcorn to the students during recess...) IF we earned it over the week. We earned it by behaving, doing our chores, etc. As we got older, he increased the amount until we were getting $5... BUT if we wanted makeup, extra clothes, etc. we had to save up that money and buy it ourselves. Of course, he was pretty good about getting us 'extra' stuff when he felt we deserved it. (If he could afford it.)

I also love Financial Peace Jr. . . . but we ended up doing ours with a twist. We had the same problems a few other moms had - getting behind, forgetting who did what when, etc so now we pay daily. I go to the bank and get a handful of $1's to keep on hand and my oldest gets $1 per day (we've done it since she was 6, now she is 8) and it is HER responsibility to ask us to check her chart and get her allowance every day. We don't go back to previous days if she forgets, it is the last thing on her chore chart. And for those that think $1 per day is too much, we expect her to give and save a portion, plus she does not earn $1 every day so it's worked out fine for us. Plus, we are "mean" and expect our girls to pay for a lot of their own things (toys, treats, bday and Christmas gifts for family - I do "friend" bday presents).

Anyway, keeping a week's worth of chores in a page protector and using a dry-erase marker to mark off, then paying "daily" has worked well for us. My oldest does slack off a lot from time to time, but I don't have to push b/c when she realizes she wants money she gets back on the ball. And she is successfully learning to manage her money. The youngest is really too young to "get it" but we are doing it with her anyway and giving her a coin (usually a penny) so she feels involved, and as she gets older we will adjust hers. Good luck!

I struggle with this as well. We have chores assigned to our 8 yo and 15 year old. They also get an allowance: $1/wk for our younger child, $20/week for our older daughter. Our youngest simply puts it in her piggy bank and if she wants to buy something (rarely), we tell her she has to use her piggy money or ask for it for her birthday or Christmas.
The older one is supposed to use her allowance to buy her "luxury" tolietries and cosmetics, any clothing that isn't a necessity, her movie/dinner/school sporting event admission spending money since we feel it is a generous amount. She likes to "save" her money for expensive clothes/boots, etc and is constantly asking for money for things they are selling at school, basketball game admissions, etc. She says "I'm saving for x, why do I have to pay for *that*? Every time she is with me at walmart, she throws Red Bulls, nail polish, etc in the cart and wants me to pay for them. It's a constant battle. We are constantly re-defining for her what she has to pay for, but she doesn't think it's fair. So, as they get older, it gets tougher.
I'm curious to see what others are doing and how it works.

My children get a small allowance, but it's not based on their chores. I feel that if it was based on chores, it would be teaching them to expect something for everything. Keeping our homes clean is a job that must be done, regardless of monetary gain. Learning to be proud of it in it's own right is much better.

I started doing it because it's teaching them responsibility and because I got tired of them asking if they can have something at the store. Now I simply ask if they have their money and if no, then it's the end of the issue. They pay for their own stuff or if previously agreed upon, we will split the cost depending what the item is. My children are still pretty young, 8 & under, and their allowance is based on their age; one quarter per week per year. So for instance my oldest would get 8 quarters a week which just about rounds out to $8 a month depending on how long the month is.

When they receive it they're required to put some into their piggy banks, a small amount aside for charity (they like putting change in the Humane Society banks at stores, etc.) or Church and the rest is spending money. If they have critters, they also have to give me a small amount to help pay for feed and other supplies. They have also been encouraged to set up goals. For instance, my oldest daughter (6) decided she wanted fish. So she's been saving her money so she could get the equipment. She's learning thrifty shopping because she managed to find a really nice glass bowl at a thrift store for $2 vs. the $15 bowl she wanted at the pet store which enabled her to buy some other supplies faster. It's also taking her awhile because she had to help finance some little extras she wanted for her hamster. They weren't necessities for the creatures existence so she had to pay for them herself. My oldest boy has been saving his money so he can get a guinea pig. All three of my older children financed their own 4-H fees.

Also, if they break something on purpose that belongs to one of their siblings they have to either pay to replace it or pay the equivalent to the owner of the object they destroyed. (We don't pay retail for hardly anything, all of their toys are from thrift stores which is why I'm able to do this with them.) It teaches them responsibility for their actions. I've seen many less broken toys now that they know that if they break it, they'll have to pay to replace it. Toys are a privilege, not an entitlement.

Sometimes they get money at holidays or birthdays but we've taught them this is not the norm so if they do receive something, awesome, but if not, oh well. It's much more appreciated that way and they don't feel like it's an entitlement.

As for chores, they do get fined if they don't do a job properly on purpose. (Such as shoving everything under their bed or not putting their clothes away and just throwing them on the floor) because this can cost them time as well as supplies (so money). It's rare this happens though but when it does it depends on the child and the chore as to how much I might ask them for. It ranges from a penny to a quarter at a time, from their spending money. They're learning that way it's much better to do their job properly and on time than to procrastinate or not do it well in the first place. This also works every time I hear foul language from them. They automatically get fined $0.10.

The first time we did this, I wasn't very consistent until I actually started putting that amount into my budget. So at the beginning of the month when I withdrew money for the weeks expenses, I automatically withdrew their allowance money as well. Sometimes I might forget or might not make it to the bank when I like (We're on foot and my bank is across town; I'm also in a cam boot right now so walking distances are limited.) so I keep a running tally and then apportion it properly when I do finally get to the bank.

My perspective is that chores are done because everyone in the family needs to help out. Allowance is given to allow children to learn how to handle money. I started giving my son allowance at 3.5 because he was learning how to add and subtract and what money denominations were, and because he had started asking for toys that I didn't want to give him (but, if he wants to save his money and waste it on junk, that's ok by me). He gets $1 a week: 25 cents is put into one jar, that will eventually go to his bank account, and 75 cents goes into his piggy bank to spend as he will. I like it, because I think he IS learning lessons about saving and counting. Now, when we are out somewhere and he asks me to get him something, I always tell him that he can either put it on his wish list (and I may or may not choose to buy it next time his birthday or Christmas or other special occasion comes around) or he can save his money for it. Its only been 6 months, but he's already learned to save for better things, instead of getting junk out of vending machines. And, it really helps calm him down when he wants something, but I won't buy it for him.