Advice Please! Should We Switch Preschools??

Updated on September 30, 2014
J.F. asks from Tonawanda, NY
12 answers

So in a nutshell our 4.5 year old twins have been at the same daycare since they were 18 months old. It was always wonderful, but the past year things have really gotten bad... most of the staff have quit and the owners aren't even caring for this building anymore!

It used to be like a little family and was the most wonderful environment, but then the director moved away & slowly teachers and aids began quitting. The only staff member who hasn't quit is actually my kids preschool teacher (who I love!), but it's likely she'll be quitting soon too :( I learned from staff who quit, that the owners treat their employees very badly.
They also own 4 other daycare centers that they are constantly improving and expanding on, but don't invest in caring for this building anymore... things are getting outdated, it took forever for them to fix a broken overflowing toilet (which caused my son's anxiety to really flair up in a bad way!), and they didn't even hire a gardener this year (the weeds got as tall as my kids and I began pulling them!).
And now some of the families seem to be leaving too.

My kids do come home happy. It seems like they do have a good curriculum. So it's not that they're having a horrible experience, but do I wait or move them??
In the past, the advice we've gotten has been "it's only preschool"... "just stick it out 10 more months"... etc.

So we've looked to see what our other options might be. A more local daycare has a Universal PreK and they do have openings, but it wouldn't be funded by the city because the "slots" from that grant are full... so we would have to pay $50 more / week than we are now! For our family that's definitely pushing it.
Also I would be starting them 2 months into the school year (our current daycare requires 30 days written cancellation!). The kids at this new school have already learned some sight words,etc. and I'd hate for my kids to be behind the class. But on the same note, I think educationally this place would be even better for my kids. Plus we'd be able to use it for before/after school care for kindergarten next year since it's in our district.
We have a meeting with the potential new preschool's director this afternoon. She said there was a slight possibility she could squeeze some more funding from the city for us, but I'm not holding my breath :)

What would you do?? I guess I'm just looking for any advice from other moms because I honestly don't know if i'm overreacting about our current situation or doing a disservice to my kids by keeping them there? I'm just torn. I want to do what's right for my kids, but is it worth an extra $200/month to get out of where we are now? Or should we just stick it out until next summer?

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So What Happened?

Yeah, the weeds were just an example, sorry to sound petty. And the toilet issue is resolved now (even though my son still has some issues because of the whole fiasco)... my point was just that they have no pride in this building anymore, which seems to represent how everything is being taken care of there. They just don't seem to care :( And when employers don't care about their staff and treat them poorly, I worry those employees aren't always as motivated in their work...

I had thought about asking the teacher her intentions, but I wasn't sure if that was entirely appropriate. Maybe I'll start there...

Also, just to clarify, the new preschool I mentioned is one of the city's Pre-K programs (it's not a preschool). It just happens to be at a daycare which offers before/after care right there. What our children have been doing is not "only" child care... it does have a curriculum and they have learned a lot, but I understand preschool is not quite the same as Pre-K. We can't drop childcare all together, because my husband & I both work Mon-Thurs, so unfortunately it'll never be free!

Thanks so much for your responses!

More Answers

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S.T.

answers from New York on

Your kids will have no memory of this and as long as they're being taken care of that's all that matters. Have you thought about pulling the teacher aside and asking her intentions? I moved my son to a new daycare provider at age 3 becuase theschool changed hands and the teachers were leaving - we followed the teacher to the new, much smaller school. But we had 2 full years to go. Unless you children are in danger or in some harm I would stick it out til the end of the year. A change to a new school may be harder than you expect.

4 moms found this helpful
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J.F.

answers from Las Vegas on

J.,

Talk to your children's teacher and ask about her intentions. If she plans to remain for the rest of the year, it seems that your children would be fine to stay at their current school. The only thing that would make me consider moving them would be if their current teacher also plans to leave.

Doesn't hurt to take a look at the other school, just to know what your options are in the event your children's teacher does leave at some point.

Good luck and don't stress about this! They have many more years of education ahead of them. As long as they are safe and properly cared for, everything will be fine.

J. F.

4 moms found this helpful
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G.♣.

answers from Springfield on

Well, the things that stick out to me the most in your post are "My kids do come home happy" and a complaint about weeds. You did mention the toilet, but it sounds like that's no longer a problem.

If your kids are happy, that's pretty much all that matters. Weeds wouldn't bother me. I wouldn't even notice, and they certainly don't affect my children's safety. I don't mean to be petty. The weeds were probably just an example. Maybe you have more that you didn't list that would persuade me. But weeds along wouldn't even be on my radar.

The only reason I would consider moving them, were if they truly were going to be affected in some way. Maybe if their teacher really did leave, maybe if there were other things being neglected that could have a negative effect.

But based on your post alone? No, I would definitely not move them. Kindergarten is going to be a big change. I would like to avoid any major changes in the mean time. If you do need after school care, that could be the time to make a change ... when they would deal with kindergarten and after school at the same time. But I would not move them right now.

3 moms found this helpful

T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

I get how you would be annoyed and upset with all the negatives happening there right now but if your kids are happy (and safe) then why move them?
I would also NEVER send my kids to a preschool that taught sight words. How awful and developmentally inappropriate.
I'd take weeds over that kind of academic overkill any day :-(

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K.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

I agree with those who suggested talking to your teacher. Sit down with her and explain your concerns. Tell her that you've heard rumors she might be quitting. Get a sense of her state of mind - is she still dedicated to the class, or is she frustrated with the administration and dealing with a lot of bitterness?

If the teacher seems happy and plans to stay through the rest of the school year, I would keep your children where they are. They're used to it, they have friends there (I assume) and you've been happy with the program until recently.

That said, if the teacher is leaving or is clearly disgruntled, then I think moving your kids might be best. They won't have a good experience if their teacher is grumpy all the time. They need someone nurturing and able to help them grow.

I wouldn't worry about the academics or falling behind. Preschool should be about learning through play and shouldn't have a heavy focus on academics. If the class is doing lessons to learn sight words, that's not necessarily the best program to be in either. Kids this age need a play-based curriculum, not an academic one.

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R.K.

answers from Boston on

I think you want to leave and that the examples you have given us indicate an on-going and worsening problem. I'm glad your children like their teacher, but I didn't read any praise for the actual learning going on. And for those who say "It's just preschool.", there is a huge difference in what is available and I think you are looking out for your children's education. And really, does this sound like a place that you would like to spend your day in?

So... look around and consider what you can do with your family's budget in case you decide to change. I also think that you are correct in thinking of the future and securing a before and afterschool setting for next year may be the right thing to do.

In the meantime, do not share your concerns with your children. Little ones have a sixth sense about their parents' concerns, so this will not be easy, but it is very important. All my best.

2 moms found this helpful

D.B.

answers from Boston on

I think you have to decide what the purpose of preschool is. If you think it's learning sight words and being academically driven, you're narrowing your options. So worrying about them "being behind" is a huge problem. Have you talked to kindergarten teachers about what they want and expect? I'll venture that virtually none of them care about whether kids can read or do math facts or recite state capitals or anything else. They want kids who are secure, can separate from parents, can sit in a circle, follow basic directions, and negotiate their own space without whacking each other. If they can write their name, that's extra. All my colleagues in both private and public schools agree with that - their biggest problems are actually with the kids who are all intellectually "ahead" but don't have basic socialization skills or the level of maturity needed to function in a large class (which may be as much as 2.5 times the size of a preschool class).

I would be concerned if the kids' current teacher may be leaving - I wouldn't blame her based on the pattern you are seeing. I know several have suggested you take her aside and ask her what her plans are, but if I were that teacher, I would not be sharing my professional information with the public especially if there is an issue with management/new ownership. If they treat their people badly, what do you think they will do if they hear this teacher is thinking of leaving? Aside from that, it's really inappropriate for you (or anyone else) to take your professional relationship with a teacher and turn it personal.

Is this center licensed by the state? I assume so. Therefore there are regulations governing things like the toilet - that's a hygiene issue and you say it also contributed to your child's anxiety. The weeds are unsightly and I cannot believe they make the school appealing to prospective families, but they are less of an issue. If it were my school and I used all my money to buy the school and had nothing left for maintenance, I'd be organizing a Family Fun day at the school on a weekend with teams of parents to help spruce things up, see if local nurseries will donate some plants, see if local merchants will donate things for a raffle, and similar things to get everyone to feel good about this school community. But if they're in it for the money only, maybe they aren't thinking that way.

I think you have to look at whether your kids' teacher has enough staying power, or if the school is going to make her decision for her (to save money) and kick her out before the end of the year. You may have to make a decision on someone else's timetable and not on your own anyway.

I also wonder if you have had time to look into other options - are there really only 2 schools to choose between? Again, I'd go for the security and stability of knowing the staff will be stable, and not worry about the academics at all. You say your kids are happy where they are (except for the flare-up of anxiety?) but if you are not proactive about finding an alternative and something major happens (like the teacher leaving or being fired), you'll be stuck. You have the added problem of looking for two slots because you have twins. So your options will be severely limited if this situation goes south without you being prepared.

Good luck.

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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

If you think it is imminent that they will lose their teacher, I would move them now. Not taking care of the property, high turnover...those are things to be wary of. It is not just about their learning in preschool, but their health and well-being. I would move them earlier in the year rather than later. Make it your choice vs and emergency move to somewhere with an opening. Preschool and Pre-K definitions vary. My DD's school called itself a preschool but I see that they did many of the same things as the district-sponsored Pre-K classroom, based on what I see on the walls.

I would talk to the other program about where your sons are academically. I would also look around at other preschool programs, sight words or not. Play based preschool is a great way for kids to learn. I would just be worried that lack of care on the owner's part will force your hand when you are not ready and cannot make an informed decision.

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B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

Stick it out till next summer.

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I'd call the local school district and ask them if they have a couple of openings in their pre-K class. Why even go to child care preschool when they will learn so much more in Pre-K. I have gone both ways and the Pre-K class was actually much more learning even though they still have plenty of play time and nap time and more. It was much more specific on the skills they had in the curriculum.

Otherwise it doesn't really matter. If your child is safe during the day and is busy and having fun then don't change.

There is no benefit of moving her. It is ONLY child care and is nothing like real Pre-K. Not to say the program isn't good, just not Pre-K.

I'd enroll them in the public school system Pre-K then drop the child care all together. Then it's free. If they need after school care find a parent in that classroom and offer them half of what you were paying the child care or less. It would be for many less hours than they were in child care and much easier.

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D.D.

answers from Pittsburgh on

If the teacher your kids have is leaving, I would move them now, before it's too late into the school year.

And I think it's fine to ask the teacher her intentions (privately, without the director around, and promising her that you won't tell the director her answer).

1 mom found this helpful

L.L.

answers from Dover on

Have you spoken to your current preschool about your concerns?

The new preschool, can you afford it? If not, it's not really an option for you unless they can get the funding or would agree to cut the rate for you.

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