Advice on Dealing with an 8 Month W/temper Tantrums.

Sometimes my little girl (8 months today) will make a grunting noise like she's mad. The other day the teacher said she was so funny because she did that to her, but I have no idea why she does it. She does get very mad or upset when she wants me to hold her and I put her down or she wants to just crawl around and explore and she can't. When in the car, if she is crying and I can't pull over, I'll sing to her, talk to her, or put a soft music CD on and she will fall asleep, or crack the windows and the sound soothes her. Sometimes she cries that hard, but it is usually when something is really wrong like uncomfortable, hungry etc...She has been getting a little more clingy lately too. I know when she is just crying for me now though. When she is trying to work me, I try not to give in.

At around 7 1/2 months, my son started having "breath holding spells". He gets so upset that he starts crying without any noise at all. He is essentially holding his breath during this time and wails silently for so long that he turns blue from head to toe and eventually passes out. Sometimes he even shakes a little and is usually pretty stiff when all of this is happening. He's been cleared from having epilepsy by a Pediatric Neurologist and also cleared of having heart problems or anemia. All of the doctors say that this is the baby equivalent of temper tantrums. His final diagnosis is that he has a strong will.

His spells are usually associated with extreme hunger, exhaustion, being ignored when he needs a little loving, etc. He is not a clingy baby (stopped being clingy when he started crawling and realized that there is a big world out there beyond mommy's arms). I DO NOT hold him all of the time. I just try to be really in tune with him and his cries.

He used to only do this with mommy or daddy. He has done it once with grandma and once while in the church nursery. He scared the volunteers to death.

The doctor said that since he started so early, he will probably outgrow them early, too. He is now 11 months. We have already seen a decrease in frequency and severity within the last few weeks.

It's amazing, but if he is sleepy and in his crib, he can settle himself quite well.

yes A.,

nothing is worse than an inconsolable baby...my son didn't cry often but when he did it was due to colic. Unfortunately, mylicon did not work for him...you know what did...water...his pediatrician was like give him water...i did and he became the water baby...the water was soothing to his tummy and he would drink a water bottle before a milk bottle...of course his tastes changed as he got older :) some of the others are right if medical reasons can be ruled out for the crying than in time the crying will subside...its just a matter of how long you can take it

Take care

T.

my daughters are all grown up and they have temper tantrums now worse then they ever did when they were young. My youngest was colicky She ended up sleeping on washer and dryer in a bed I made for her while I did laundry in middle of night and slept on couch. I am now a daycare teacher. Have taught 2 yrs old and now sub in infant to 18 mnts. When my "new" babies throw their tantrum as long as I know they aren't hurt, hungry or wet I do not pick them up I keep a special toy that has bright colors to catch their attention and pull it out and let them play with it while singing nursery rhymes. Once the tantrum is over and they are all calmed down then I'll pick them up about 5 minutes later and give them some loving. Just so they don't relate that everytime they throw a fit they won't get their way. With my 2 yrs old I had one that would throw a fit (were talking taking off her clothes and throwing them at me) I would ignore as much as possible and start a new activity to catch their attention I would get down on hands and knees to her level and whisper that if she stop the fit and get dress she could play with us. Never try to scream over them it won't work. I always whisper to get their attention. hope this helps. and always when the fit is thru wait a few minutes and hug and love them and spoil them then. don't reward the fit only the good actions.

my daughter is 6 months old and she does the same thing cries and then happy when i pick her up she is most likely going through a stage like my daughter.

Hi A.,

I'm a mother of a 3yr-old son and two 11mth-old twin girls. Around the period where they are around 7-11 mths, infants develop separation anxiety. Sometimes if I pick up one of the girls and leave the other one in her crib, the one in the crib will get a little hysterical. They like to be held more often around that time, and there is nothing wrong with that. I do not believe that there is a such thing as spoiling an infant when he or she is that young. Remember each child is different. So if your son did not have "temper tantrums" at 8 mths doesn't mean it will be the same for your daughter. I know it is hard to work full time and come home to be a full time mother (I've been there). If she feels like she doesn't see you that often, then she will want to be held when she sees you, and play with you as much as she can.

Another thing to think about is that she could be colicky. If that is the case, you can purchase a bottle of gripe water and give her. It will calm her down alot. You can buy a bottle at Kroger grocery store if there's one by you. I hope this information helps.

First thing that came to mind is maybe she is/was tired or hungry...? My 26 month old will get very upset and angry when she is either hungry or tired; if it goes unnoticed by the time I figured it out it was too late to stop the trantrums. Hind sight is 20/20 and I can now read these "tantrums" so I have learned to keep snacks around and make sure she gets her scheduled naps.
Not sure if this sheds some light on your situation, but (almost) anything is worth a try!
Good luck and keep your patience, "this too shall pass".
M.

I can only offer comfort having been there with my now 13 mos old. She did the same to me last night. Started crying in the middle of the store and it lasted through dinner. In between she screamed so loud you thought someone was hurting her. But after a while I just put her on the floor with me and her 3 1/2 yr old brother and suddenly the whole world was ok again. These are the things we go through, not daily but still quite often. I've learned with our DD that she hates changes in her routine, and she was very clingy for the first 12 months. But it really has gotten much better. Believe me, it will change.

If you are anything like me.... you can't understand why children are completely different. I have a 4 1/2 year old a 2 1/2 year old and an 8 month old and they are all totally different. Right now I would tell you it's normal... it's really a struggle for the little one. They want to be independent but at the same time they want mommy to help. Really, I think it's an internal struggle for the little one that they learn to deal with as they get older. But a great book that helped me with my second one was the happiest toddler on the block... and using sign language... both of these things helped us communicate with the younger children and let us know that we are good parents!

I'm havn the same problems sweetie, ur not alone. Pls get back to me if u get any help:)

don't worry, your baby isn't angry with you! it is just a phase! my daughter could cry and cry and get so mad until even her twin brother would try to console her! and this would go on for ever it seemed. a good rule of thumb is if she is truly screaming...not crying...but screaming...for over an hour, take her to the doctor. otherwise, she could just be going through some tummy / teething problems. i ALWAYS had plenty of mylacon on hand. it always seemed to do the trick! at least for a little while. and sometimes too, if they had been crying a long time, i would give a little motrin to help settle them down due to the fact that crying so hard and using all those little muscles could make them sore and have a hard time going to sleep!

but really the best advice i can give you is this:

this too, will pass.

stay strong! may God bless you all!

ps...i know your daughter is probably too old for the exercauser...or will be outgrowing it soon, but have you thought about one of those jumpy swings that hangs in the door frame? my kids loved these things...and sometimes when the crying started...i diverted attention to those things.