Advice Needed for Proper Time to Leave Child Alone While Eating

why don't you sit with the child while he is eating if you are so concerned? By the age of 2 they are pretty good eaters and don't need to be supervised ALL the time.

As much as we want to protect our children, it really is a lot to ask that we hover over them every second of every day. At some point, we have to trust our (and our partners') intuition as parents. Assuming your child doesn't have a propensity for choking on his food and that your wife doesn't leave him alone for hours on end, I personally think it's all right to leave him alone while eating for a couple minutes at a time.

Hey R.,

While there is always a chance something could go wrong, Cheerios are too small to lodge in and BLOCK his windpipe so that he could not get air at this time. Raisins can glue themselves together and I would be more careful about these. This means that if a cheerio got stuck, it would be uncomfortable for him but he would be able to cough, yell, cry etc. to get mom's attention. If she isn't too far away and is listening for him and checking in on him every so often this really is fine - especially if he is sitting at the table to eat his snack.

On another note, Mom's have instincts about a lot of things. Honor her instincts. Especially if she is the one home with the child the most, she probably knows really well what your son can or cannot handle. You married her - probably at least in part because you felt she was trustworthy, so trust her now. Also know, that moms have a really hard job because they have to balance the child's need for independence with his or her need for safety and protection. At two they REALLY NEED some time to themselves but they also still need a lot of snacks and general monitoring. She also probably needs a break from block building, truck smashing, and etc. and needs to get some other things done during the day too. Let your son and she have this time.

R.

I disagree... but you probably only want to hear from those who support your views. I think it would be helpful if you spend a few days (meaning 24/7)making sure your toddler is absolutely safe. If you do that, you will soon find out what your wife already knows. Good luck! Alex, mother to 5 :)

I think you are both right, however after raising 2 kids now 6 and 9, I appreciate that your wife cannot be on 24 hour snack patrol. Small things like cheerios or raisins will not get lodged in your childs throat. You might worry if it was hot dog bites or grapes, but cereals dissolves fast, same with goldfish crackers, bananas, etc. and are less likely to become lodged. Talk to your pediatrician, I remember mine had a little tool he used to show the size of choke hazards.
Here is the most important, your wife needs a break. Even if it is one minute to check the laundry. The last thing you need is your wife leaving YOU with all the responsibility while she recovers in a mental institute from her nervous breakdown. It is 10 times harder to be home daily with a 2 year old than to work a corporate job 50 hours a week.
A few snacks while your child is in the next room will be ok, millions of children each year survive in neglectful, drug infested homes, just remember that. good luck!

Hi R.,
It seems that you have gotten enough advice on the topic in general, but I have one thing to ask about that has not been mentioned. My question pertains to why your why wife is leaving him alone - is she needing time for herself, or time to get things done around the house without the baby?
I don't know your situation, so if I'm off base, forgive me, but does your wife get enough time alone to accomplish what she neees to? That might be either task related things, or could be just needing some down time.
A mom who doesn't get enough time alone may scrap for time, taking it where she can find it. Perhaps if her needs are being met in the time department, she might feel less of a need to find situations where she can leave the child alone.
A mom who is rejuvenated, or even reasonably caught up on life (I don't know that that ever happens), is available to be more attentive and present.
I know that having children makes like so much more full for everyone, and that's just the way it is. I would encourage you to evaluate your situation to see if your wife's needs are being met. Just because a mom is "home all day" doesn't mean she isn't working. Just as "working" people need breaks and a lunch hour, moms need time out as well, but it can often go unrecognized and unfulfilled. Plus, a mom's job extends far beyond 8-5.
Again, I don't know your situation, and you did not say whether or not she is a stay at home mom, but this is something that stood out to me that I thought I'd try to add a little perspective about. Often times the "problems" are really just symptoms of something else.
All the best,
M.

Hello R.,

I have a 10 month old daughter who eats cheerios and (sometimes) fruit loops, actually, she eats many different foods. I have a good amount of faith in her ability to chew and swallow her foods, because I do watch her eat.
Her Highchair has wheels and if I need to be in the living room, or in another room of the house, I just push her chair to that room, so she's with me. I suppose it wouldn't hurt to offer this suggestion to your wife.
BUT, I will say that I've read some of the other advice and I agree with what Kelly C had to say about needing to speak privately wife your wife on this issue. Getting a bunch of advice from strangers and then ganging up on her with that information may leave her feeling attacked and needing to defend herself, she probably wouldn't be as willing to discuss the issues you're concerned with at that point.
It is possible your wife has a lot to do, maybe you can take the time to watch your son while he eats, so she can get other things done. I'm sure your wife has spent many hours watching your son eat, he's probably been eating for at least a year, she is obviously comfortable with his ability to chew and swallow his food, and she probably knows which foods he's okay with eating unsupervised.
If you are really worried, which I believe you are, then talk to her about how worried you are and why. Suggest ways to help, like bringing his chair into the room she's going to be in, or maybe only putting one or two fruit loops on the tray at a time so he can't over fill his mouth. I think making helpful suggestions and showing that you want to help her will get you a lot farther then attacking her skills as a mother and telling her flat out she's wrong.

I think you are being a bit over protective. It's been alot of years but I'm fairly certain I didn't sit and watch my daughter consume everything she ever ate. I think most Moms do chores and are in and out of the room that their child is in -except of course when they are in the bathtub.

while I agree with you completly that kids can choke in a instant weather they have a perpencity to choke or not, I don't agree with how you are handling it. Getting other moms to bash her is not the way to go. Sit and talk to your wife openly and honestly (when the kids are in bed) and let her know how you feel. Get facts from the internet or books to show her why you feel this way, don't just tell her how other moms feel. Do not try to bash or bombard her with all of these facts that you collect. Let her know you are truely worried, and let her know that the guilt would eat both of you up if anything did happen on anybodys "watch". My only other thought is, if you know your wife is leaving your son to eat these certain items, where are you? When did it solely become the moms responsablily to watch the children while they were eating. Try and take a hands on approach to parenting instead of looking on the internet to find other moms to take your side. This is not the way to raise children, and it certainly is not the way to be a husband.

My son choked on a Cheerio at that age. My grandfather actually hopped over a chair in a restaurant and got it out of his throat with a finger. So don't believe the "can't choke on a Cheerio" thing.

Is she just leaving the room for a minute to get laundry or something? That wouldn't bother me. But if she's leaving him alone for a while, why is she doing that? Toddlers have a way of getting themselves into trouble (read: danger) if they're left alone to do much besides sleep. Unfortunately for tired parents, they pretty much require constant supervision.

And yes, I do see the relationship issue as well. But we don't jump all over moms who disagree with their husbands, do we? And we certainly don't tell them to get off the internet. After all, why aren't we all just discussing these things with our husbands? Sheesh.

Hi, R.!

First, may I say it's cool to see a man post on site. As for your question, I feel it's okay for your son to be left alone for short increments while eating. I've left mine alone for 5 to 10 minutes at a time, checking in on them in between. It also depends on what he's eating... I'd feel safer with him eating Fruit Loops over raisins, for example. Or crackers over grapes. There comes the time when parents need to take a deep breath and let their kids learn (with distanced supervision).

Good luck, R.!

L.

Wow. The answer to the question isn't an answer to the problem. I highly recommend that you two get on the same page because this kind of thing is not good for your marriage and subsequently not good for your kid.

As a counselor I always recommend couples to go to a parenting class together or at the very least read a parenting book together. The best thing that this accomplishes is bringing to light some of these issues so that you can be in agreement BEFORE they occur. If you are arguing about it while it's going on your kid doesn't get the attention he needs and neither of your convictions regarding action will be effective.

Regarding your question: what are we talking here? Leaving him with cereal while she switches the laundry or while she watches a soap opera? Obviously the soap opera is out and the minute long laundry swap is fine. God forbid some ACCIDENT occur to your darling. Not only will you have the trauma of the accident but the blame could tear your marriage apart as well.

To molly h.
How dare you? You dont even know these people and you're accusing them of neglect and "subcontiosly" wanting her child to die???? What is wrong with you???? That is not only offensive to me as a mother, but probably heartbreaking to the person who you're giving so called "advice" to...
This is a website for people who want to help each other, not judge!!!! The woman is probably simply overwhelmed and wants a minute of piece and a minute with her husband... Perhaps leaving your child alone with food isnt the greatest idea, but how dare you be so rude and judgemental...
And for R.,
why not just put him in a high chair a foot away from you and if worst comes to worse, put on a show on tv or some music...and then give him his cheerios... That way you all get your own "quite time"... There's absolutely nothing wrong with that...

i find fathers a bit more on edge with the children as they are not with them as much as the mothers. it is wise to make sure the food the child is eating is less likely to cause choking, however, anyone at any age can choke, so, when your child is older, are you going to follow your 14 yr old around making sure they are fine all day? if your wife is worried about mess and that is why your child is left in another room, check out the snack-trap. they have them at babys-r-us. they are great at reducing spills and that way your child can follow mom around while she is doing things she need to get done. dry cereal seems pretty harmless to me. you hear of people choking on grapes or chunks of cheese. my son and daughter have both choked on frozen cherries, and thankfully i have walked into the room as they were in distress. i wasn't able to help them though. i did the heimlich several times, slapped them on their backs super hard several times and nothing, just as i would start to panic, they were able to cough it back up. i didn't leave them alone with frozen cherries again, but i let them alone with other foods. i don't want to negate your concern, nor do i want to make light of the hazards of choking - i know children have died from that, but i would discourage any parent from being obsessed about certain issues. maybe you could take this opportunity to work with your son on the manner in which he eats. to take one piece at a time and to chew it thoroughly. not a rushed explanation, but sit with him, show him, encourage him, every day. it is never too early for lessons on etiquette =)

So, I do ask myself if something goes wrong, will I regret my decision, but at the same time, I will ask myself am I driving myself crazy. There are times that moms feel comfortable leaving their child unattended doing something that is perfectly normal that others will think she is insane, bottom line she will do nothing to harm your child and you should trust her! Don't drive yourself crazy and enjoy the little time you have with her while she is young, it goes by fast!

Wow, I feel intimidated to write honestly.
My son is 2.5 and my husband and I do the same as your wife. While getting ready in the morning we give him his cereal w/milk & a yogurt or fruit. He is normally in the family room watching his morning shows while we get dressed & get everything together for the day. I guess we have just been around him long enough to know that he is ok with what he is eating. Tortilla chips however, are a whole other issue.
If there is an issue between you and your wife (obviously there is), then just have her give him things you know he can't choke on-yogurt, cottage cheese, etc. while she isn't watching him.
You do have to have some sort of faith though that your wife knows your son and his limitations.

I personally leave my 2.5 year old to eat breakfast every morning in our dining room which is adjacent to our kitchen. We do not have the tv on, so I feel I will here her, if she needs me. She also eats PB sandwhiches every afternoon, occasionally while playing in her playroom. Has your child ever had choking issues? Fortunately, my daughter has never had reflux issues, or issues swallowing. I know my child is fine.

Hi R.,

I also leave my son to eat dry cereal alone or raisins but I had the same concern you had when I notice that he would stuff his mouth, so what I did was I would only put about two or 3 raisins on his table at a time and when I'm passing through the kitchen I would give him the same amount and the reason is because I am trying to accomplish two goals at the same time. I hope this helps you.

I am so blown away by this. I agree with Kelly C and can't belive that people are not seeing that this is not the place to argue this out. A wife does have instincts with her kids - especially a stay at home mom... they may not always be right, but this is really an undermining way of handling things. When my husband tries to tell me how to handle a situation, oblivious to how things really run in a day I get pretty frustruated. This is sticky and I feel like R. your wife is getting attacked... I am actually right there with her! I allow my second child, my daughter 21 months to eat raisins and cheerios at the table often while I wander the house doing things. She is comfortable, focused on something and I can hear her singing and moving things around and I trust she is ok without me for a few minutes. I check in or she calls out to check on me and we are ok. I do this all the time.

Thus I am also getting an education. I respect the comments on choking and appreciate the details of why people feel how they do. I will take from this a warrant of caution and probably be more careful of my actions as far as eating unattended goes, but ladies PLEASE be aware that we don't abandon the "support" part of this message board and realize there is a side here we may not be seeing. Being a mom is isolating enough on its own.

R., I hope you can work this out in a composed way.

Okay , first of all I acknowledge that this is only my opinion, but here it is . We live in an age when many people every day are diagnosed with eating disorders. We also live in a society where multitasking is a much treasured ability. Understood . Here's the thing as I see it. I know we lead busy lives. I know that lots is expected of us every day. But our little ones are only little for a short time. In 20 years the kids will be raised for better or for worse, all our chances to help our kids lead happy productive lives will be done. But the house will still be there. If the dishes don't get done, or the floor mopped today , it can be done tomorrow, But the time with our child will be past. So Much More than physical sustanance happens at a meal. Mealtime is time for communication, socialization, there are skills to be learned, ideals to be taught, love to be expressed. Most importantly love to be expressed. Please tell your wife that it is okay if dinner is a minute later or the floor isn't vacuumed every day or all the laundry isn't done. Tell her to take the time to appreciate this wondrous little boy you are raising. To enjoy a meal with him, to get down on the floor and play cars while he still wants to play with her. Take time to tell him the things that are important to her, and find out what's important to him. Believe me even at this age he has a few opinions of his own. Mealtime is a great time to exchange all sorts of information. It's about alot more than food. Yes there are also real safety dangers. And the risk of developing poor eating habits is serious. My point is something other than time with your son is taking precedence in your wifes eyes. Nothing ever should . The time we spend in the company of our loved ones IS the best and most meaningful time of our lives. It is not time squandered, it's the times we will remember when the kids are grown and all we have to do in a day is our dishes.

R.,

I totally agree that anything can happen at any time...even when you or your wife are sitting right there with him. I have a 2 year old and often leave her with snacks/lunch while I run around the house doing laundry, picking up, taking care of my 10 month old..always checking on her in minutes or actually always have her in my sight. To sit and watch them every waking minute would be ideal, but in a real world...we have MANY other things to do in unison with taking care of them. Also, try and teach him to eat foods one-by-one vs. a whole handful...this may ease your worry. All the best! S.

R.,
The proper time to leave a child alone while eating is after the age of 5 years old; and even then supervision is needed. The younger the child is the more need there is for direct supervision. Older children can be left alone to play, eat, or do an assignment around 8 yrs or older, with occaisional looking in to monitor the childs safety, behaviors, and the like. Tell your wife "AT NO TIME SHOULD SHE LEAVE HER 2 YEAR OLD ALONE!!!!!!!" AND FOR NO REASON....ESPECIALLY EATING. I say this as a mother of three (21, 14, and 12) and a professional children social worker. Hope this helps. Take care.
M.

I think both of you in a way are right. :) My son is 2.5 and always has his snacks outside or in the other room. Sometimes i am there but usually i am in and out of that room while he is eating. I worry about chocking but not excessively where it makes me crazy and won't let him do things. Come up with something in the middle that you guys can decide on. Try it for a day or two and see how he does. My biggest worry when i leave my son alone with food is that he plays with it and makes a mess...lol I DO NOT let him play and eat, thats where i get worried about chocking. He sits and eats and if he gets up i take it away. He now knows that if he wants to play he brings his snack into the kitcken!
You have to do what is best for son and your family but advice is always great!
Good Luck!

Hi R.:
First of all I want to say, that its really rather refreshing seeing a (father) taking such an interest,and coming to (mama source for advice.Most fathers are to busy,or leave the majority of the child rearing decisions to the wifes.I think you've hit on a topic,that we as mothers have all been quilty of at one time or another.Child care,is a 24/7 job,without much of a break. The few times, that women may get a breather are when their children take a nap,or are in their highchair eating.Because we know,that our child is in one place,and can get into very little mischief,we tend to take advantage of that opportunity,and try to get something accomplished.We may hurry to put a load of clothes in,or run to make a bed..We may use that time to run to the bathroom.However, I'm quite sure, that whenever any of us have done that, A little voice inside,reminds us,of the tragic stories we have read or seen and how in a matter of a few minutes,your child can be taken from you.Reguardless of the size,shape, consistancy,or amount of food your child is consuming at the time,The ultimate question here,is (Is anything...any task? any phone call? worth (Taking the risk?) Absolutely not. R.,Please remember, Its not whos right or wrong, only ... (WHO) is most important here.Best of luck to you all.

R.,
I absoulutely agree with you about choking. It is sooooooooo serious. I have 7 kids and I never ever get comfortable leaving a child unattended while eating. I have seen everyone of my children choke at some point, not because I am a laid back mom about this thing, but because the esophogus of a baby/ 2 year old is very small. I have seen my kids choke on things that you wouldn't suspect. Just because they are small and soft doesn't mean that they are safe,(raisins by the way are not soft and are big chokers!) Kids are notorius for stuffing food in their mouths till it is packed full. Babies and toddlers will experiment with anything and everything even food, especially if left alone and unattended.
Ask your pediatrician to advise you about leaving your 2 year old alone while eating.
Your wife I am sure is a wonderful mom and is very conscientios about most everything regarding your child. It just sounds like she is a little too trusting in this area and has been fortunate this far not to have had any scary choking incidents. I would urge her to reconsider this one. It really is dangerous and I am sure she would agree it really is better to be safe than sorry.
Make sure that when you share this information with her that you do tell her that she is a great mom and that you appreciate how wonderful she is with your 2 year old. Sometimes us moms get defensive on some things that we shouldn't, merely because we feel like we are being criticized and aren't a good mom. If put in loving terms she will agree with you more readily and want to do the safer thing.
If you can figure this one out how women and moms are wired,(sooner than later) you will have a much smoother sailing ship!!!!!!
Good luck R.. Trust me be loving about it. She will be on your side!!!!!

I am a mother of 4 kids. Training a 2 years old child to eat on his own is a must but never leave him eating alone, anything can happen in a snap. He still need supervision. At least make him visible to you.

I have to say that I agree with you. You can never be to safe when it comes to toddler. Anything is possible. I would not leave him alone. If he is a room next to you where you can see him clearly that would probably be ok but keep a close eye on him.

Could you use a video baby monitor to get some one-on-one time? I think it is ok to leave him to eat by himself for a short period of time, however, I'd want to watch him somehow.

Hi R., You never leave small children alone while they eat, I've seen adults choke on small bites of food, I don't really have advice on a proper age, even school aged kids at school are monitered while they eat. Eating alone is no fun, children should always eat with/around the family. Hopefully your wife will appreciate all the responses you'll will get, since I'm sure none of them will be in support of leaving a 2 year old alone while they eat. J. L.

R. ~ My daughter had a small part of apple stuck while I was sitting right next to her.....They don't make noise when they can't breath... Ask your wife if what she is doing out side the room is more important than the life of your child? Is it really worth taking that chance? Anything can happen to anyone, there is no "special" person out there who doesn't have bad things happen to them. Best of luck to you.

R.,

I hope, with all my heart, that you can convince your wife that this is a risk that no one should take. There are so many things in life we can not control, but this can be. It takes only a second for something terrible to happen. I have a 10 and 7 year old and I NEVER let one eat alone.

My daughter choked when she was just over a year. She was chewing on her bib and there was an old size sticker stuck to the back. Of course I only discovered this after she had turned purple and was unable to breathe. I WAS AMAZED THAT CHOKING IS A SILENT ACTION!! Luckily I got out, but had I even gone to the bathroom she could have died.

I hope your efforts work.

M.

Good luck

I agree with you R..

As a mother of 2, now 18 and 28 years old, I was always very nervous about my children choking on food or drink, especially while they were still learning how to eat by themselves. I always made sure I had something to do in the kitchen while they were eating. I mean lets face it, adults still choke occasionally on food and drink, your child is only 2!

Choking is not only a concern here, children can also find other places to put food, such as stuff it up their nose and in their ears. This could cause an unexpected visit to the doctor or the emergency room.

When my kids were small, my motto was always, Better Safe Than Sorry!

T.

I totally agree with you. I am a mother of 2 children. I would NEVER leave a 2 yr old unattended while they were eating. Exactly what you said something could happen and you would not know until it's to late. Besides at such a young age why would you leave them by them selves??? At 2 yrs of age they are so unpredictable. That's kind of disturbing that she would do that. Would you like to eat alone???

I hope this helps!!!!
B. E.

Personally, at age 2, I would not leave my child unsupervised doing anything, unless they are in their room - taking a nap or at night time sleeping - at age 2 they are much to young to really understand that they could be potential danger.

I think it depends on your child. Some kids at that age are ready to eat on their own, most aren't. I would encourage your wife to remain in the room with him while he's eating. Good luck.

M.

Hi R.,
what a great dad you are. I have to say I agree with you. I would never leave a child alone in another room, eating or not. You never know what could happen and yes, it happens that quick. My daughter choked once and I had to do the Heimlick manuver on her. Thank God she was in my lap when it happen.

I feel you are right my son chocked on a small peace of bread
it was the scariest moment of my lifebetter safe then sorry!! i cut my kids food up tell they were 12 years old(both) like i said better safe then sorry hope that helps chris

I would NEVER leave a child un-attended while they are eating. I might walk around doing things, but I constantly look at my childrens faces while they are eating. Choking is NOT always a noisy affair. If someone is truly choking, they can not even gasp out for help. I also provide care for other children, and I would never leave them alone either.
I would suggest you have your wife talk to your childs doctor about this.Not all moms are willing to listen to other moms. But it's hard to argue with a doctor. Good luck R..

R.,
Raisins and Fruit Loops are not likely to cause a child to stop breathing. If you think about it, a child's wind pipe is about the size of a quarter, therefore, anything that will easliy fit through and not lodge there will not cause your child to stop breathing. If he swallows too much food at once and is not able to swallow easily he will begin coughing which your wife would hear could help him and the coughing would clear his wind pipe. Unless he were eating more typical choking hazards, such as vienna sausages, carrot coins, or even hard candy, he should be fine eating without constant supervision.

But I would not leave him alone to eat his meals for other reasons, such as the social aspect of meals. I would not leave a child alone to eat very often or for very long, just because its lonely to eat by one's self all the time.

Its good you have taken the time to look into this. Yes, at 2 years old, they are not yet "expert" at eating and feeding themselves everything. I mean, even a 5 year old could choke on something if they are not careful. Or, accidents can happen which we don't "plan" for. AND we as Parents, can NEVER predict what can happen. A 2 year old toddler is TOO young to be left eating my themselves. You don't have to "hover" but they need supervision. Many times, as the others said, they can also put too much food in their mouth and choke this way as well, or worse.

*I have PERSONAL experience. As a child, at about 10 years old, I had choked and had a candy sucker lodged in my throat. YES, There were people around me close by, but NO ONE knew.....because I could NOT even speak, could NOT talk, could NOT make any sounds whatsoever, and could not breathe. And I wasn't "able" to run up to anyone to let them know I was in trouble. (it's not like on T.V.) When someone is choking and going to asphyxiating, they CANNOT "tell" you much less play charades or run up to you. CHOKING IS A "SILENT" ACCIDENT. I was very scared.... with the very last smidgen of "air" I had left in my lungs, I FORCIBLY tried to cough, and fortunately the candy literally flew out of my mouth. It happened in a matter of seconds. If I did not manage to get the candy unstuck...well, you can imagine what could have happened to me. I would not be here writing this. I always remember that and what happened to me. It's really really scary to say the least. Remember, ASPHYXIATION HAPPENS IN SECONDS.

With this in mind.... yes, a 2 year old child can get into this situation as well. As a Mom myself, I can understand how we sometimes go to another room while our child is occupied... we have to go to the bathroom, clean, and other things. However, a child needs supervision...especially when they are eating. Especially at this age as well. Also, they are mobile at this age, and can walk anywhere or get into anything. By the time my children were even 2 years old for example, they were picking up step stools or chairs and dragging them to counters to climb up and reach for things. Yikes.

Just wanted to share my personal experience with this as a child, and as a Mother. I do think, that a child should have supervision while eating. Yes, fruit loops, cereal AND raisins ARE CHOKING HAZARDS. ANY FOOD can become a potential choking hazard. Even adults choke and die from it. A child is much too young to be made "responsible" for their eating consequences. Even bread can be a choking hazard...the longer it is in the mouth, it becomes "gummy" in texture and if stuck in the mouth or throat, it becomes a GREAT danger as it is like peanut butter and can BLOCK the throat and asphyxiate anyone.

**In light of the other comment...please, if you approach your wife about this, make it all with good intentions... Sometimes a person may get offended if "questioned." Don't be accusatory, do it with care. But this IS an important topic and must be addressed. No, I don't believe you are "ganging up" on your wife... woman do this ALL the time and go on message boards and websites to research topics and to get a consensus and then go tell their Husbands. Right women? We are an active demographic. It's just a part of figuring out what to do, when we don't know ourselves. My husband & I both do "research" like this, BUT it is done openly AND we always talk about it. We don't do it to pick on the other person. We do it to enlighten ourselves and to trouble shoot and to get ideas.

All parents have different levels of how they handle their kids. BUT, safety must be a top concern. Can you imagine life without your child, because she choked?

Take care and I hope the best for you in this situation.
~Susan
www.cafepress.com/littlegoogoo

I agree with you R.. I run a daycare and do not leave any child under the age of 3 alone to eat. You may want to compromise and no more choking snacks when you want to leave them alone. Foods like Cheese, cut up turkey, pasta, peaches, bananas are soft and are okay. But dry cereal, raisens, hot dogs, apples, carrots never leave a child alone while eating.

Good luck. better safe than sorry ;)

M.

R.,
I believe that there is always a chance to choke. Besides, I believe that there should be set snack times in a designated place than just random eating in any room. This way your child can be supervised while eating and play independently when your wife needs to get some things done.

Dear R. you are so right,though it may seem that mothers have a sixth sense about their kids ,every minute counts when choking occurs you cant always "hear" a child choking either so tell mom to take the baby with her in the other room in a walker or high chair its better to have to vaccum up a little cereal than to risk losing your little one. hope this helps A.

Please do not leave your two year old alone while he is awake. Whether he is eating or playing, he needs to be with one or the other of his parents. And at two years old, he really needs to be with his mother. If she has an emergency, there should be another adult in the house to watch him, otherwise I suggest she take him with her. I shudder at the thought of what could happen to a two year old baby left alone. It only takes an instant, and somethings can not be undone. I recommend Mom stay with her little one.

Hello R..
First I'd like to pat you on the back as it shows you are a concerned father. We shall see more fathers ask questions too.
On your concerns, you have all he right, and you are very right that a 2 year old should not be left alone while eating even if it's fruit loops or raisins. At that age the toddler are still learning to chew & for the most part, they tend to swallow and not chew. Please keep him/her at your site no matter what. About 15 years ago i went through a scary situation with my daughter, whom in my presence was starting to choke on a piece of fruit...... imagine if i wasn't around....
Keep up the good work!
D.

I cannot say that I agree for the same reasons. I never left my children (and still don't) because I want them to have manners. When children get left alone feeding, they tend to get messy and do whatever they feel like, and then, they are not learning how to be at the table and eat properly. Yes there is always a chance of choking, but at 2, as long as you are not far, you are close enough. The bigger issue here is for you two to come to an agreement together :] Good luck and God Bless You!

Dear R.,

I'm with you. I almost choked to death on a piece of steak that I accidently swallowed before I was ready to while having dinner (it was really embarrassing). And I don't want to tell you how old I am. But a little two-year-old might not know the "Heimlich signal" yet. ... I was a stay at home mom and I was always in the same room as my kids, especially while they were eating, which usually took place in the high chair and not walking around the house.

Absouluty not! My son was fed a small chip at that age, without me knowing it, and started choking. I tried slapping him on the back and that didn't work. Lucky for him, there was a nurse and doctor close by, so the nurse tried and tried slapping him on the back and the chip was still stuck. The doctor said try one more time and do it as hard as you can, and she did and then the chip came out. He was blue at the time and had a bruise on his back the size of a orange.The doctor said he was ready to cut his throat open. We spent the rest of the day and night in the hospital taking x-rays and observation. He is now a healthy ten year old, but the memory in my mind will never go away. And I'm still afraid to see him eat a taco or chips. Good Luck!!

Kelly C. IS ABSOLUTELY RIGHT. Too bad no one else has the foresight nor the guts to say what she did. Talk to your wife now, and don't even tell her that you asked a message board and took advice from a bunch of strangers.

I don't think any child should be left alone while eating - at least check on him every couple of minutes or so (as long as you can hear him from the other room)...

I agree!! It is very important to stay with you child while they are eating. There will not be any sound if something becomes lodged in their throat like you see on TV. It is not worth the chance.

I agree. Also a heads up---two year olds shouldn't be eating raisins yet. It's high on the list of choking hazards. Talk to your pediatrician if they didn't give you a list of foods to hold off on for now.

PLEASE don't ever leave your child alone while eating. Our friend is a pediatric trauma surgeon and has shared many stories of "preventable" deaths in children related to choking. One was a little boy, who, while riding in the back seat of the car, choked to death on a piece of chewing gum. His mother found him dead when they arrived at their destination... Hot Dogs, raisins, whole grapes, and many more are common choking hazards. Besides, I'm sure your son would enjoy company while he's eating! I never leave any of my three children alone, EVER while eating. My husband is a physician as well, and wouldn't dream of it either. Choking can occur so quickly and if someone isn't there to assist, one can choke to death quickly. I hope this helps!

I would agree that she should not leave a 2 year old alone to eat. I don't think any child should be left alone. What would be the reasoning?? Maybe if she fights the issue you can pick up one of those baby monitors with a camera so she can at least see your little one. Good luck.

I think that it is never safe to leave a yongster alone, because anything can happen in split seconds. But bear in mind that children's physical development and ability differs accordingly, maybe your child has shown his mother his capability of how well he can swallow and eat. If you don't feel save, it is a good way to ring the cereal in a string and tie it around your child's wrist,just like the hard candies that are sold as bracelet. Or else, you can give him a small amount at a time(10-15 pieces) , and come back to check on him. When my daughter was two, I always wash my dishes, prepare food for cooking later, while she eats. It helps me be able to monitor her.
Still, discuss the matter with your wife to find a solution that will fit the both of you.

Hope this will help.

A.

since we have such a small apartment i am almost always in the same room as my kids or at least very close by while they are snacking. i dont like to leave my child unattended while eating, even though every time they started to choke their strong (and i mean strong!) lungs always managed to push out the food before i could even stand up to grab them! but i still dont like to take the chance.

also, my husband bugs me about some things similar to this, i think that if you want something done right you have to do it yourself. give your wife your views and if she still doesnt agree then maybe you should be the one at home with the kid while mom is at work.

Hi R.

Never Leave a two year old eating alone. I have seen children choke when there parents were there.

Two-year olds are busy, busy people and a lot can happen in an instant. (And, I have a 13 mo old and 3 year old so I am speaking from experience as well.) So, beyond the choking hazard, I think any safety expert wouldn't leave a child alone at 2. Just in the news recently, a two-year old died when he was playing in his room and a dresser fell on him, another two-year old got tangled up in blind cords, another wandered off and drowned in a little pond, etc., etc. Even if the place your son is in is perfectly baby-proofed, I would think there is something he could fall into, fall off of, etc. Or, maybe I am misunderstanding and he is in a high chair? You didn't say...In that case, below is the info on raisins:

I know a lot of people give raisins early, but here's what I found on babycenter.com. It says to wait until at least three! The site has a lot of great info re: do's and don'ts. If you want to email it or print it, just google Baby Center raisins and the article comes right up. Another way you can ask your wife to look at it is, "If you read in the paper about another baby/toddler who choked and his mom was in the other room, what would you think?" I can't think of any better use of the saying Better Safe Than Sorry, than when it comes to a child!!

From www.babycenter.com
Small, hard foods such as raisins, dried apricots, and dates are a serious choking hazard. Because they're so sticky, they can easily become lodged in your baby's throat, cutting off his airway. That's why the American Dietetic Association (ADA) recommends waiting until your child is about 4 years old before letting him eat these kinds of dried fruits. "Some kids can chew raisins well at age 3, but just to be safe, it's best to wait until they're closer to 4," says Susan Moores, a registered dietitian in St. Paul, Minnesota, and a spokeswoman for the ADA. If your preschooler likes raisins, cut them in half before serving them. Chop other dried fruits into finger-tip-sized pieces.

And here's another reason to keep raisins away from your child as long as possible: They've been linked to cavities. Because they're so chewy, these treats tend to stick to the teeth, giving bacteria in the mouth something to thrive on. The built-up bacteria produce acids that, over time, destroy tooth enamel and cause tooth decay. To keep the cavity culprits at bay, have your child brush his teeth after eating raisins or, if that's not possible, give him a glass of water and encourage him to swish it around in his mouth to rinse away the raisin residue.

I think your wife feels he needs to be independent, but say you are correct he is still to young to be left alone while eating. if she would ask the pediatrician, i'm sure he/she will agree with your concern.

Hi R.,
I agree with you 100%. There is a great chance of choking & I would never leave my 2 yr old out of my sight while eating. My son is 3 now & he does like to eat in his room, but I am still watching him, because you never know. It wouldn't take much effort to have your son eat in front of you so you can watch him.

I hope you all will stay safe & healthy.

L. C

Never leave a child alone while eating! I am the mother of 4 and I also have a home daycare. My days all revolve around children. I had a 5 year old choke on Cheerios right in front of me. At 2 they're not experienced enough with food to be left alone. A 2 year old shouldn't be left out of sight at all.

Hey R.---

My advice is to NEVER leave your child unattended while eating---------Never!!!!
It's the responsibility parents to keep a watchful eye on their little ones at all times. Bath time and meal time are especially important. It only takes a few seconds for something tragic to happen.

Just ask your wife how she will feel if she is wrong. Not worth the risk.

First of, as a mother and a grandmother, I would NEVER let my children or grandchildren eat alone. It is not SAFE and it is not CIVIL. Meals are to be taken together.

But let me give you another perspective. When I worked for the school district taking care of babies and toddlers (of teens), we had to place all the high chairs around the meal supervisor and that person was not permitted to even look away, much less walk away! Even then, there were lots of "incidents" and scary moments because, like you said, the children mash too much into their mouths or start to laugh or talk or sing with a mouthful and choke.

Another poster put it very well: choking victims rarely make a sound. We need to be right there. Here's an example: I was once at a packed restaurant sitting near a party of four. Even though our own conversation was lively, I realized that one of the adults at the other table had begun to choke and NO ONE WITH HIM HAD NOTICED. I jumped up and shouted, "HE'S CHOKING!" planning to administer the Hiemlich but thankfully, a big guy at his table (I don't think my arms would've reached around the victim!) quickly did it and saved the man. After all the crying and thank yous and all that, it occured to me that he'd never made a sound (no banging on the table or waving arms) to alert anyone! Even adults are vulnerable! How much more do our babies need us?!

Best wishes,

M.

Foods that melt in your mouth such as cheerios/fruit loops are one thing, but nuts and hard foods are another. Your wife is probably in and out of the room checking on your child pretty often. We have that built in instinct to always be listening or checking up on our kids.
A two year old is a more experienced eater than say an infant just learning to eat solid food.
Your wife most likely has the most experience feeding your little one. Trust her. If your child does choke, she can help him clear his throat if he has problems doing it on his own.
The foods you mentioned are foods most parents feed their toddlers without harm; small enough to get down the throat easily.

Hi R. and wife,
I am a child care provider and I have children under 5 in my care. I do not leave them alone when they are eating.
Choking is not the noisy coughing you here when something goes down the wrong way, it is silent. You do not hear them choking.
If you have not done so, you should both enroll in an infant toddler CPR/first aid class! It is so important.
Also, having supervision while eating gives you a chance to teach them how much to put in their mouth. I have had numerous kids stuff their mouth full of food that tastes good to them. I remind them gently, 'not too much, you need to have room in your mouth to chew!'
Take this opportunity to teach table manners as well. You won't regret it!
C. K

I think you are a father that has intuition in him. And that is wonderful! Most fathers and men alone, do not. I have two sides to this. I think a mother has the best intuition, but maybe this is not the best in her favor. I've done a few stupid things with my son on occasion by leaving him alone in particular situations. I have to say each time I have, I think to myself, "what if". I just believe you are thinking in cracks that your wife is not. I just think your kid is incredibly lucky to have two awesome parents that care about him this way. If you want your wife to knock it off, then tell her she cannot do this if no one else is around because you are afraid of an accident (I don't see how a mother would not understand that!). And if you or someone else is around, she should let that person know if she's going to take off for a few minutes. I wish my son had a dad that cared as much as you do. But don't make bad on your wife for doing this. She's also putting trust in the child (although it isn't really careful, it's still trust). Take it at face value and take it to heart....work it out with her. When you talk from your heart, that works best. Please don't blame her or make her feel like she's done something wrong.

Best of luck,
L.

I don't leave my 4 year old unattended while eating for any length of time.

But the likelihood of choking on a froot loop or raisen is slim and I wouldn't fret.

Grapes, carrots, and the like are definitely something to supervise 100% at that age.

I'd suggest cheerios instead of froot loops. No need to load up a baby with all that sugar.

I don't think that there is any length of time that I would EVEN CONSIDER thinking as proper for a 2 year old. Let me share a very sad and tragic example why I feel this way. I was on vacation visiting my grandmother abroad when one day while we were having dinner, someone starting banging on the back door. She lived in a high rise, and there were two apartments per floor. Her next door neighbor happened to be a Naval doctor. When we opened the door, it was one of the neighbor's nanny asking hysterically to knock on the doctor's door because the little girl that she took care of was choking on a peanut!!
NOW MIND YOU, this was a 9 year old little girl who was more than capable to eat on her own and was eating a candy bar, something like a snickers, that chopped pieces of peanuts in it. Not even whole peanuts!!!! And unfortunately one of these pieces went down her windpipe and got lodged, her parents tried frantically to do everything possible to dislodge it, but TRAGICALLY THE LITTLE GIRL PASSED AWAY!!! Like I said before this was a full grown child and she had a FREAK incident occur to her, but when you're talking about a 2 year old toddler I feek they are more apt to have something happen, HEAVEN FORBID!!! like you said they shove A LOT of food in their mouths at one time so why take the chance? I'm sure your child is very precious to you, so lets not leave anything to chance.
Thank you so much and I hope this story of this poor little girl prevents another tragedy from happening.

Hi R.,

Actually, I agree with you. Nothing may happen but if it did, it would be a tragedy. Until your baby learns to eat slowly and chew everything, you need to keep an eye on him. Have him eat in the room you are in. Just remember that until your child is 5 or 6, raising him is a full-time job. If you put your time in then, it's easier during the rest of the growing up. Also, R., I assume you work but when you're not at work you can be with your son while he eats so the responsibility isn't all on your wife. Raising a child 24/7 is much more exhausting, physically, mentally and emotionally, than a full-time job. I've done both and there's no comparison.

V.

I never leave my kids totally unattended while they are eating. Our living room/dining room/kitchen are open areas with a small dividing wall. But I can always here my 3.5 yo if he is eating in the dining room. I will often times let him sit at the dining table to eat for a few minutes while I am in the kitchen doing dishes or in the living room folding clothes. But I am always in earshot of him and can quickly peak my head around to look at him. I would not do something like leave him in a room where I couldn't hear or quickly get a visual on him at ANY TIME. Kids in the 2-5 age range are just too curious...especially little boys. If I leave my son alone in the living room for two minutes to use the restroom I come out and everything in the entertainment center is pulled out and all over the floor.

I would just talk to your wife about your concerns. But don't make it seem like you are judging her parenting skills. We Moms get pretty defensive about that.

Good Luck!

I think your wife is taking a tremendous risk by leaving her young child alone while eating. And to be honest, I don't know what she is thinking. My daughter choked on a grape when she was almost 4, and luckily we were right their to save her. A 7 year old choked on a grape at a local school here recently and was saved by an employee walking through the cafeteria. My children are now 12 and although I may now leave the room when they eat, I am never out of earshot, ever!! What could be more important than the safety of your child? Whatever you need to get done while your child is eating, should wait until later, or bring the child with you to the location you are doing whatever it is you so need to do.

I'm with you on this one R.. When in doubt, I always ask myself; Will I regret this if something goes wrong? I like to face my daughter at all times when she is eating, I have been at the dinner table with guests, who prefer the eye contact while talking. Once just for a couple of seconds while making the polite eye contact, my daughter gagged with too much food in her mouth. Of course she was alright, but I still prefer to supervise. I don't chew the food for her, I even let her work out her own reflexes, but I supervise. Good luck.

Well while I am comfortable with my 18 month old daughter eating cheerios, I still am very hesitant to leave her unattended while she's eating pretty much anything. Both my son (now 12) and my daughter have choked on food where the heimlich maneuver was needed.
My son was almost two years old and eating a chicken finger. I was very comfortable giving pretty much anything up until that point and my neighbor had to run over (after I ran out to get them) and get it out.
My daughter was eating a french fry and not a very big one but kindof long. She put the whole thing in her mouth and both my husband and I were sitting there when it happened. I was watching her eat (because after my son, I now really never leave my daughter alone eating) and she didn't gag, she opened her mouth with no sound and my husband didn't even realize what was happening until I had her up and out of the seat. That's when he saw that she wasn't making any noise and something was clearly wrong. I eventually dislodged the french fry (because by now I'd learned the baby heimlich) and the entire thing popped out.
No sound, no indication she was choking just an open mouth and a scared expression. If we weren't watching her, who knows how long before we noticed.
I'm a little more carefree with cheerios because they are small and dissolve quickly but NEVER raisins as they are a choking hazard in general. But I never let her eat alone with anything for very long (only cheerios for maybe a minute) because it happens in a split second.
Our friend's three year old grandson last year choked on a carrot which put him in the hospital and he later died.
They do grow up and fast... and you don't have to watch them forever but think of it this way, at two years old, they've only been eating for a year or a little more. Not a long time in the grand scheme of things.
Think about how you drove after having your license after a year versus how you drive now. Clearly, you're a much better driver with a few years of experience. The same goes for eating.
Again with the raisins and other more chokable foods, this is a good link
http://www.askdrsears.com/html/3/t030400.asp

Oh and I should add one more thing... it's not just moms that say to supervise, the experts do too. It only takes 4 minutes without air to cause brain damage.
http://www.fda.gov/fdac/features/2005/505_choking.html

2 years old is way too young to leave alone for anything but watching tv or sleeping. age 4 or 5 on up wolud be alt better

Hello R.,

I am not quite sure how to respond, I feel concerned about the situation. Personally, I think small children need as much attention as we can give them no matter where they are and what they are doing. Children can choke on anything. At two years old, I let my youngest son in the backyard to play and he picked up some gravel we had in the yard and put it in his mouth. I wasn't looking when he put the gravel in his mouth, but thankfully when I did look at him I noticed something in his mouth. He was actually chewing the rocks! I made him spit it out of course. I know it is hard to be home all day with kids, but they do not know what we adults know. It is very easy for them to get into trouble. I would advise that you not let your son do much of anything alone until he goes to school (kinder). Besides, it isn't very much fun to eat alone.

God bless!
B.

I totally agree with you. While I may roam in and out of the room, I never leave my 2 year old alone with food.

Hi R.,

At this age you never want to take any risk by leaving him alone while eating. I have a 18-month old boy who also eats by the hand full and stuffs his mouth full. Sometimes I have to take food out of his mouth before he is about to choke himself. It is scary!! We cut everything in small pieces for him to eat and we always sit next to him while he is eating. - S.

Hi There R.......
I am a person who does not like to come between a husband and a wife , but when i read this request of your's i had to say soem thing here.......
i am a CPR certi instructor and i hold classes all teh time . and i am surrounded by medical people in the family that come home with all kinds of stories and to hear them , makes me cry....The biggest thing when we teach our CPR to the public who does not have anykind of experience in teh medical field , is that we tell them , that " SUPERVISION , SUPERVISION , SUPERVISION ",,,,,,,,IS THE KEY FACTOR TO SAVING A LIFE. The worst thing that can happen to a child or that age is , ( what it is called an , completly obstructed airway with no exchange of air ). It means that when teh person , regardless of the age , you cant hear them coughing and it is silent to the ear. If this occours , u will never know when he got chocked and for how long . and you can even loss him to death . Now it sounds very harsh , but there is no other way to put this . and more over we hear from Perimedics that they cant even do anything in this case. If ever you want her to really understand the gravity of this , she needs to attend a class of CPR , to really know what is goign on . If not then talk to a firefighter. or nurse or doc. Any one who has had to experience the tragidy of trying to bring back a baby from chocking. if not then you can email me privetly and can talk there........
best of luck to the both of you. Hope she sees the gravity of all of this .
L.

I do agree with not leaving a child alone to eat. Raisins make me really nervous though I do give them to my daughter. I, personally, would not let her eat something like that w/o me close. I do let her wander around w/ her snacks but if she leaves the room, I follow her. I just feel that the convenience is NOT worth the risk. Obviously, your wife feels differently & certainly it's a personal choice. However, I do think it's a subject the two of you should discuss & hopefully come to a compromise that you are both comfortable with. Good luck.

Use your parenting instincts. I agree, do not child should be left alone while eating.

I would NEVER leave my child alone in another room eating after what happened with my daughter when she was around the same age. She was sitting in her high chair eating crackers and I saw laying on the couch in front of her but started closing my eyes becase I was tired. The next thing I knew, her face was bright red and her eyes were starting to water. She was chocking on the crackers and coulnd't even make a sound! Luckily I was able to grab her, flip her over, give her a whack on her back, and the crackers came out. It scared me to death! I had often gone into the other room to go grab something or go to the bathroom and leave her but after that I realized how quickly things can change. I don't even want to THINK about what could have happened.

ALWAYS favor on the side of caution. I agree with you 100%, Dad. It doesn't matter how small the individual pieces are, he may stuff too many and cause himself serious harm. My 19 month old is a notorious "stuffer", or better yet, "swallower". I'm constantly observing her and reminding her to "chew, chew, chew". There will come a day when you don't have to worry soooo much, but not quite at two years old.

i don't think you should ever leave a child alone while eating, they are still at their learning stages and might choke on any type of food, my freinds used to call me worry wart, i'd rather be a worry wart then sorry for not doing my part. remember it takes only a second to not have a second chance

R.,
YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT. My sister had to go to a memorial service for a child just under two, that choked. It took the parents a long time to forgive themselves for the lack of attention. They assumed he was capable of eating well, because he normally chewed everything. If it can happen to adults, it can happen to children. A child doesn't know to try to run into the other room and get the help they need. Which they may not have the time to do so. I hope this helps. You are not being overprotective.

E.

R.,

I agree with you 110%! My daughter is eleven years old and I still do not leave her in the room alone when she is eating. When she was about 7 she choked on an orange. It was stringy and one piece went down her throat while the other piece was still in her mouth. She couldn't talk, scream or make any noise - not even a choking noise as no air was able to come up.

If I had been in the other room she could have died! She paniced and didn't know what to do. I don't think that she would have come to me.

Stay strong on the issue! Have her bring something into the room that she can do while he is eating - fold laundry or write out a grocery list - whatever, but don't leave the room!

Good Luck!
T.

Hi R.,
I have 2 children, a boy and a girl now 7 and 5 and my boy has been very prone to "choke" on stuff, so I understand your question/concern.
I have to assume that you mean that your wife walks into another room that is closed off from the one the child is in, and that would not be ok to me.
Since your child is still very young, it is better to be safe than sorry, why risk it? Either wait until your child is done with the snack, or pick him/her up and take them along to whatever room you're going to.
As a side note - I had to call an ambulance twice for my son and I was right next to him when he started gagging and choking (once on a piece of apple, once a potato chip)!
Thankfully, both times I was able to help him get it up by the time help arrived.

I have a two year old as well and I am conservative like you are. I try to not leave him alone when he is eating (sometimes I have to for a bathroom break)but I insist that he sit at the table to eat meals and snacks (at our house). As a former fire dispatcher, I have handled calls regarding people choking. Choking incidents are rare, but they do happen and there is always the possibility. Good luck and best wishes to your family.
R., mom to 1 2 year old.

I have to say I agree with you R.. If your son was truly choking and needed help, he would be silent. If he's choking and can cough, that means he's probably ok. So I personally wouldn't risk it. Who wants to take that chance? Always better safe than sorry with kids. Hope this helps and good luck to you!

Young children should always be supervised when eating. My 20-month old son also loves to eat his food by the handfuls. We haven't given him raisins yet, due to them being great choking hazards, but he does eat Joe's O's (Trader Joe 'Cheerios'). If I have to go to another room, I make sure that I'm really quick.

That being said, next time I wouldn't, as my friend says, "throw your wife under the bus" when you are asking for advice. I believe a "my wife does this, but I think this...what do you all think?" type of matter could create a great division between you two, and I don't think that's what you intend to do. I'm just trying to save you from any marital grievances. The fact that you and my husband have the same name made me want more to help protect you. :)

Best regards,
M.

I agree that your son needs supervision wih food. Fruit loops, raisins and anything else can easily cause him to choke. It is one thing to run to the bathroom and right back or go grab the phone and come right back, but I would say he should not be left alone longer than a minute or so. I am guilty of walking away from my children at times while they are eating too, this is a bit if a reminder for me as well. I understand it is a nice moment of get away for us mommies when our children are content and eating, wow, I can get so much done in my house with that 5-10 minutes, but it really is not worth the danger of choking! If my 9 year old or 7 year old are eating with my four or two year old then I don't mind walking away, my two littlest ones are eating alone, I try to not leave them.

Good luck!! God bless you and your family.

Hi R.,
Couldn't agree with you more!! The choking possibly is very much a thing to be quite aware of.
More IMPORTANTLY--the child needs interaction with Parents.
At meals especially, this is the time to show your child
proper manners!!!! It, otherwise will be too late to show
any child proper table manners, types of silverware, how to
use them and just plain---Don't leave Your Baby unattended
---EVER! And too, make sure that baby is never left unattended
when in someone elses care.
Their little lives are much more fragile than Your Wife may
beleive! Take Care of that Child !! There is NO such thing
as--TOO CAREFUL!!!!
Good Luck,
C. S.
p.s. logged is spelled lodged

It's fine in terms of choking, especially at that age. BUT do we want kids to learn poor eating habits like we have? Kids should eat in the high chair or at the table, never in front of the tv grazing... Sugar cereals aren't the best idea anyway. Try some healthy snacks, childhood obesity and diabetes are on the rise.

Are you kidding? NEVER leave a 2-year-old alone, unless they are sound asleep.

Hi R.,
Perhaps she can use this "snack time" with your child to BOND more? for myself, even if i'm busy doing chores, i ALWAYS stop what i'm doing and will sit down with my kids and eat with them or sit with them during their snack time..we make it special mommy/kids time at the kitchen table. my kids are not allowed to eat in any other room than the kitchen...just a house rule and they respect this.

It's good to see a concerned dad - it's RARE these days.
~A.

It only takes a second.....for something to happen. I am a preschool teacher. We NEVER turn our backs on the children while they are eating snack or lunch much less leave the room. Adults can even choke when eating alone.......
But, as for children I wouldn't until they are much older.

Hey R.

Good question.... My kids are now in their teen years, but when my son was 3 we were in a restaurant and he was eating a hot dog and he was choking on a "small" piece. I saw him and grabbed him and did the Heimlich maneuver on him. The piece of hot-dog came out of his throat and he started crying. I comforted him and talked with him and he was okay. It was very scarey and if he would of been alone he would .... well, not a good outcome. Like I said...my kids are in their teens and I still ask them if they are all-right when they are in the shower or bath. You should always check on children of all ages whether they are in the kitchen, bath or outside playing. It is just the safe/protective thing to do.

Good luck
D.

I have a daughter who is almost two and I never let her eat out of my sight. I am always about 10 feet away from her at most and in the same room. I believe it is important to be able to hear your child and check on them immediately at all times. A two year old is still getting used to eating solids and doesn't always eat them properly. If no one is watching your son while he eats, he may not be able to communicate that he is choking, due to the food in his throat. I also believe that children this age and even a few years older need supervision in all aspects of what they do, bathtime, play time, mealtime, etc. As mothers, we have the duty to protect our children at all times, chores and whatever else come secondary.

Well my son is 2 years old (here on Wednesday). He eats Cheerios and I don't really leave the room he eats in. I stay in the room and make sure that nothing happens. If I am in the other room doing something real quick I always ask him how he is doing and if he doesn't say anything to me then I go back in and check. But most of the time I stay in the same room he is eating in and just do some stuff in there so that I know I can turn around and make sure he is doing ok. Just tell your wife the you would feel much better if she is in the same room as your son.