Advice for Sleeping Newborn

I used this with my son, I filled a sock with uncooked rice & tied the end. Microwave it until warm, not hot!! It retains the warmth for about 15 minutes, then when you place baby in bed, either place sock under legs or place beside, I have even laid it across his belly and the extra warmth tricked him into thinking I was still there & it cools slowly allowing him to get back into deep sleep before cold. Hope this works for you too.

Hi, you've already got some great responses, but here's my two cents... I just had my second child - he's now 7 weeks old. Both had wacky sleep schedules the first month or so. Hang in there doing whatever you need to to get through that first month, then it usually gets easier. For us, we co-slept most of the time with both kids for that first month. Then started transitioning to sleeping in their own bed. When we have a rough night, we still co-sleep. We also use the bouncy seat, car seat, or swing to get some extra sleep when needed. That said, I'm a huge believer in getting lots of motionless sleep, so we use those things sparingly. But when times are hard, any kind of sleep is better than no sleep at all - for everyone's sake!

Also, both of my kids have had bad acid reflux, making them really uncomfortable as soon as they lay down flat on their backs. Hence, a bouncy seat or swing worked better because they could be more upright. We tilted the crib mattress and it works great!

Infants don't develop habits, they only express authentic needs. It will be many months before you need to worry about creating bad habits in your little guy. Right now he needs human contact, movement, holding, voice, suckling. That will change gradually in coming months as he becomes more alert and aware of the world around him.

He's in what Dr. Harvey Karp, author of the terrific book The Happiest Baby on the Block, calls the Fourth Trimester, which is a period of adjustment of the helpless baby to the sensations and requirements of the outside world. Here are some helpful videos that explain why this is so and how to help your baby make this challenging transition:

Interview: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iu0TtxO-ocY&feature=re...

How-to's: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G6KnVPUdEgQ&feature=re...

Enhancing baby's sleep: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tk5MUOMecHI&NR=1

He's brand new. He's only 4 days old. He was just _inside_ you. Of course he wants to be close. Just bring him into bed with you. My little guy only wanted to sleep right in the crook of my arm for about a month, and then was good in his crib. You're not setting up any habits at all yet.

If you really need to put him down (even moms need a break!) try covered up in a bouncy seat. Sometimes they prefer to be upright as opposed to on their backs.

Good luck.

It's too early. Sorry.

I am NOT a fan of co-sleeping, but babies this young rarely sleep on their own. My son refused to sleep in his bassinet for the first week of his life, and my daughter wouldn't do it until she was a month old. You can keep trying, of course, but you'll probably get better sleep if you recognize that, for at least the next couple of days (and possibly the next couple of weeks), everyone will sleep better if you're holding Baby.

The good news is that this isn't creating any sort of bad habits. It's too early to worry about that. You're not going to have to "break" this baby of co-sleeping or anything - he needs to be held right now.

Co-sleeping can be a SIDS risk, which is scary, but the risk for newborns is very very small (the risk is highest between 2-4 months). What your need to worry about with a newborn is not rolling over on him. What I did with my son was stack my pillows up so I was sitting upright, put a boppy (nursing pillow) around my waist, and sleep sitting up in bed holding him, or in the Lazy Boy recliner. This was kind of uncomfortable, so with my daughter, I put all the pillows away except the two I needed, then place a boppy under one of my arms while lying down, and placed Baby in that arm. Baby was on her back (ALWAYS), swaddled (make sure the room isn't too warm, as overheating is linked with SIDS), in the space between my arm and my body, and raised up on the boppy. I could not roll on top of her because she was raised above me - frankly, I couldn't roll at all! I actually think this is a lot safer than just having Baby in your bed.

Invest in a bassinet or co-sleeper crib that can go right next to your bed. Yes, it's worth the extra money (you can find them on Amazon for about $100). The next step once the baby begins showing signs of sleeping on his own is to move him into a bed where he can still hear you breathing. This not only helps him sleep, but is recommended by the AAP to help prevent SIDS (it is recommended the baby sleep in your room for 4-6 months, although with my son, we moved him at 3.5 months because I needed my sanctuary back!) Putting him alone in a big crib in an empty room is very unnatural for him.

The first 6-8 weeks with a newborn are by far the hardest. Try to remember that your baby finds being out of the womb stressful, and it is completely natural for him to want to be with his parents. You make him feel safe again. He is living through the fourth trimester (so named because human babies are born too early in the sense that they are completely helpless for the first 3-4 months, unlike other mammals). It will get easier if you go with your son's flow. You can worry about spoiling him too much once the fourth trimester is over. Good luck.

hes a newborn. he has been squished inside of you for his whole life. sleeping by himself is not natural, and if you lived in a different part of the world or in a different time youd have never let your child be out of your sight/reach. Anyways what i am trying to say is his behavior is normal. some kids tolerate being made to conform to moderns societies thoughts on how children should sleep, others do not. His far too young to think there is any pattern in what he is doing. At this point in his life you need to do what it takes to get more sleep/ I used to lay in the middle of my bed with pillows on both sides of me and hod baby on my chest and wed sleep. cant remember for how long that lasted ( several weeks?) either way go to drsears.com and read up on infant sleep http://www.askdrsears.com/html/7/T070100.asp

I agree with Jane
He's in what's called the "forth trimester".
He's a new person and it's a scary world. Get used to no sleep, you won't get the sleep you need until they graduate and are out of the house.
Try swaddling him in a blanket you've slept with it will smell like you.
Also try picking up a "mommy bear" it is a bear that you velcro to the side of the crib and it makes womb sounds. http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2401847
If he's in a big crib try rolling up a towel or blanket and placing him in one end of the crib put the towel or blanket across the crib blocking off part of it making the space feel smaller. Does he take a binki? might try one if he doesn't.

Forth Trimester
http://www.parentmap.com/content/view/585
http://www.ninemonths.com.au/fourth-trimester/

I agree that he's still so tiny and just isn't used to being in the world yet! It's super hard on you guys but just keep at it and see what things will begin to work for you. As others have said you can't really start bad habits right now. The first 2-3 months is pretty much survival. I would be careful about bringing him into your bed, though. That is a HUGE SIDS hazard. I can't say I never did it, but I will tell you that I barely slept and I worried all night. I am kind of a worry wort but SIDS is a real deal so just be careful.

Congrats on your new son! Of all the books I read before I gave birth to my son, I never thought about reading one regarding sleep. I just thought it was pretty natural. Boy was I wrong. My son would not sleep unless he was held. He didn't like the bassinet, the swing, the crib, the car seat. He also nursed basically every hour, maybe every two hours 24 hours a day. Needless to say I could hardly walk I was so exhausted!
The first month or so, I slept on the sofa with him a lot. We have a reclining sofa so we were pretty safe on there. My hubby kept telling me I needed to do something about him sleeping somewhere else but he wasn't the one getting up every hour and getting no sleep so this is what I continued to do :) After he was about 6wks old or so, I moved him to our bed and nursed him in bed, when he woke, and then peacefully drifted off back to sleep.
He slept in bed with us until he was 7 months old and then I moved him to the crib. He still ended up in bed with us some nights.
Don't worry about spoiling him! I did everything you weren't supposed to and my son does not have any bad habits and is a happy 2 year old :) Just hold your baby and make it through these first few months as best as you can. Congrats!

He's 4 days old - you can't just go back to your normal life yet, despite how much you want to. Don't worry - in a few months' time you'll be able to establish a routine and but him to bed in his crib at a certain time at night and sleep for awhile (all night if you're lucky). For now, it's all about cuddling and holding him...he's only going to be tiny for a very short time. I'd just keep him with you guys for now, not try to make him sleep alone in his own room yet. Invest in a snuggle nest, snug bouncy seat or swing, or bassinet where you can put him down when you need to eat, wash dishes, take a shower, etc. Definitely keep him swaddled for now. Try having some music on too. And be sure he gets all of his gas bubbles out after he eats - some babies take quite awhile to get that burp out which will help tremendously when you want to swaddle him and have him calm down for awhile to sleep. Good luck! You'll soon figure out what works for him (and you guys).

My daughter was just like that. Always wanted to be close to me, on me, held. And why wouldn't they? It was hard sometimes, but if you really thing of it, of course they don't want to be down the hall alone...We ended up putting her on a little foam wedge sleep positioner in between us in bed. It kept her snug and on her back. Babies like that feeling of being snug after all that time in the womb. I think she needed to smell and hear us near, too. And it was so easy to get to her and nurse her at night that way. The wedge kept her head elevated which is supposed to help digestion and breathing, and kept her safe and stable. It was also great because when we moved her to a bassinet next to the bed and then, at 3 months, her crib in her own room, the wedge went with her so she never had an adjustment issue -- felt normal every time! Whatever you try, I would keep her close for everyone's ease and prepare to just go with the flow for a few months. Babies this age don't have any schedule and really shouldn't. Sometimes it's hard to enjoy this time, but try to - it's so fleeting!! Congrats and good luck to you.

At 4 days old, there isn't much I think you can do. That is a VERY tiny baby and sometimes they need held and your life will be exhausting for a while.

With that being said, I agree it could turn into a bad habit. Put the baby in a swing or bouncy seat when they can see you (swaddled) and talk to the baby while you do other things, or maybe even go where they can't see you. You don't need to pick the baby up every time he makes a noise - wait and see if he is going to get upset or just "talking" a little. Good luck and CONGRATULATIONS!

Does he cry when you put him in his crib or just stay awake? He probably likes the feeling of movement and it helps him stay relaxed, he is just fresh out of the oven ya know :)
I would just feed him, burp him, swaddle him tight and lay him down. That always worked for me. If he does cry and you want to get sleep just sleep with him, it's the best way to stay rested rather than fighting a losing battle. Get him used to sleeping on hubby too so you can both share in "soothing" him. Otherwise it will all fall on you and dad wont be able to soothe at all to help you out....... you dont want that to happen if you can help it.

I was very concerned about ensuring that my kids developed good sleep habits. Both of them were sleeping for 7+ hours by the time they were about 8 weeks old. We're still very, very strict about bedtime routines. Having said that, I strongly agree with the other posters that 4 days is way, way too early to try to develop any sleep habits. He's just 96 hours out of the womb!! Naturally, he wants to stay close to you! I would start real sleep training in a few weeks. By the way, my oldest son turned out to be a great sleeper, but in the first few weeks he would feed almost every hour in order to build up my milk supply. What appears to be a sleep issue in your son could possibly be his very natural and normal attempt to establish his food routine.

I think it's a good idea to put him down while he's drowsy but still slightly awake if you can. Feed him, change him, swaddle him up and hold him for a bit until you see those eyelids droop. Then try putting him into a bassinet or pack n play nearby... He might like to still hear your voices even if he's asleep and you're not holding him. Once you get him used to that try moving him to his crib. Hang in there, I remember when we were tracking each day like it was the only thing that would keep us sane.

My son wouldn't sleep unless we held him for the 1st 3 to 4 months. My husband went back to work after a week, so the glider became my new bed. We couldn't get anything to work so I slept when he did...in the glider. Good look!!! It was an exhausting few months....

We used a co-sleeper that was positioned in the middle of our bed between me and my husband. You aren't supposed to sleep with pillows or blankets on the bed when you use the co-sleeper, so you'll need to wear warmer clothes. I tried every night to get my duaghter into her basinet or crib, but she chose to move out of the co-sleeper on her own time which was about 8 weeks. The co-sleeper worked great for us, didn't establish any bad habits and allowed us all to get some sleep.Good luck! Things will get much better soon. My daughter is 9 months now (she's my second actually) and she is usally in her crib by 7 pm and goes down easily!

both my daughters had the same problem. he is used to being tucked inside of you so swaddling helps but may not be enough right now. we found that being swaddled and in the car seat felt more secure to our kids. the pediatrician saidto place the car seat in the crib so they are used to being in the crib and slowly transition them out as they get bigger. it worked wonders. best of luck. enjoy this time

don't make it a habit, hold him for feedings but put him down quick, his crib or bassinet , wherever he sleeps. I made that mistake and a year later i'm still rocking my son to sleep, he still cries as soon as i put him in his crib. My back is killing me (he's getting heavy) and i know its my fault. I got him use to that and so now he doesn't know how to fall asleep on his own. I told myself i will never do that again. So here's what i would do... after feedings i would put him in his crib, get him comfy, pat him a little and let him fall asleep like that. My son loved the swaddle, I guess yours doesn't. But try that maybe it will work, good luck. And congrats on the newborn :)

I'm sorry I don't have any advice for you but just wanted to say that my second daughter was exactly the same way. For the first two weeks I had to hold her around the clock. I slept with pillows all around me and her proped up in my arm. The good news is, she was able to sleep on her own little by little after those first two weeks and by 6 weeks she was sleeping through the night! (in her crib, alone) So just hang in there. It will pass :)

He is only 4 days, so things will constantly change, but from what I have learned with my children:

If you have a swing, or other movement type of bedding, that may work. I have four children, and my last was much different than the first three. He constantly wanted to be held, or movement. I put a swing in our room at night and that is where he slept for the first month or so. It was what worked the best in our case. And the only way that we could get a least a few hours of sleep.

I would not recommend holding him all the time to get him to sleep, I did this with my second child, and while I loved it, when she got older, she would not take naps unless she was held and rocked, which posed a problem at daycare.

Enjoy this time, and know that it is an ongoing process. Sleep will eventually come.

Try him in the swing if you have one. It was a lifesaver for us...we used it for both of our girls...for naps AND bedtime! The constant motion helped them sleep better and we got sleep too! Congratulations and good luck!

Even though I have four kids, I was never successful at getting them to sleep in their cribs as babies. I really tried with the first two, but ended up co-sleeping. It works really well for our family, I was always able to get good amount of sleep.

Another thing that was really nice is the "Fisher-Price Soothing Motions Glider". I got it for my 3rd child and used for my 4th as well, and they really loved this thing, and slept for 3-4 hours at a time in it, esp. when swaddled.

Good luck! The first month is usually pretty hard getting adjusted to everything for both mom and baby, but it will get better. Try to find a safe way to sleep while holding him, or see if you can get more help during the day when someone else can hold him, and you can sleep. Some babies are just more high maintenance then others, and it is not because you are doing something wrong. Just take it one day at a time.