B., I just had to reply after seeing the previous post. The woman who wrote it very much misunderstood and thought you only wanted to adopt a child simply because your child was lonely. I do hope you do not allow yourself to take offense by what she said, as easy as that may be to do. She is hurting terribly by the quality of people who ended up improperly raising her precious girl. Just by the mere fact you're on a website such as Mamasource, I trust you're not an alcoholic or a druggie and that you'll work to love and raise a child the best you can. Every child deserves to be raised by a loving mother, which I trust you are, as well as a loving father.
I know the pain that comes with having a difficult time having children (took 15-mo for my first child, and I recently miscarried my second child), and I'm proud of you for being willing to bring another child into your loving home through adoption. I'm sure more homes have been blessed by it than have been cursed by it. Do remember, though, that the child you adopt will still have another set of parents out there who will expect you to treat their child with the deepest respect. I'm sure you'll do brilliantly!!
I wish you the best of luck in your search to bring joy to a child by providing him or her with a stable, loving home!
P.S. Do remember, however, that the key to helping an adopted child--especially an older adopted child--grow to their full potential is to help them develop full trust in you. When children, even babies, do not have their needs met in a loving way, they often do not trust those who care for them and will feel that their instructions, rules, etc. won't really help them. This is what most often leads to the serious trouble some children get into. They try to take things into their own young hands to make sure they survive in this world. However, the same holds true with a family's biological children. Read about attachment disorders. You need rules and to enforce those rules, but you have to show them so much love. (Marriage researcher John Gottman says 5 good experiences to every 1 bad experience together is the key to a happy marriage. I think it also applies to all human relationships.) Parents who parent like that are the ones most likely to not have children in trouble with drugs and the like--not to say all kids with good parents turn out to be good. Everyone has their agency. To sum it up again, reward the good behavior, correct the bad behavior, allow them to feel the consequences of their choices (within reason based upon their age/understanding), and LOVE THEM! Again, good luck!! Parenting is the hardest job there is!