T.C.
Hi Kristi,
I am a mom of four kids. One is grown and the rest are teenagers to toddlers. I have a 14 year old that went through this. i want to say...Im not a doctor..just a mom, but this is what worked. Joshua was never affected by negative reinforcement. taking things away got us an attitude of.."who cares ill do something else"..he was talked back to his elders and those in authority at the end and it was because even in school the consequences were negative for behaviour, but nothing to reinforce the good behaviour. I decided perhaps this one was different and that he truly WASNT affected by the punishmen. He was delibberatley disobedient ..olater someone called it "oppositional defiance disorder" I praised him more and that is not to say..dish out compliments for doing what he was supposed to....but a really sincere attaboy when he completed a task that he wasnt asked to do. Granted it was hard not to get into the whole take away the xbox or tv priveledges and we did do SOME of that...but never more than 3 days...My son is now 14 and is a well behaved young man. It took us at least six months of thisand some other behavior mods like...when he was mouthy we would simply say..."why are you talking to us this way...we dont do this to you"..and leave it at that. look up Oppositional Defiance disorder..see if you can find some help..good luck to you and your sweet boy..even if he isnt acting sweet now :) {Independence is a trait you have to tame some ;)}
Take care,
T. C
Raleigh NC