7-Year-old Dressing Problem

I had troubles with 2 of my 3 daughters with the clothing issue. They were a couple of years younger that yours but I would still do the same thing. What worked for me was going through the motions of picking something out the night before, letting her change her mind in the morning, her still not wanting to get dressed, then saying that Mommy's van is leaving for school in 5 minutes and of course she will be going with me, whether she has clothes on or not! After driving her to school in nothing but her panties a couple of times she got the idea that she had to wear clothes and that Mommy wasn't going to change that. I obviously packed a set of clothes for her to put on in the van. There were some pretty cold mornings that we did this, so I also made sure there was a blanket in the van for her. Once we got to school I would ask her questions like "Is everyone else wearing clothes, What will all the other kids think about her being in her panties?" Of course I would never let it go that far, but she doesn't know that.

Also, be sure that your not picky about the outfits she wants to wear... by that I mean, if she wants to wear stripes with polkadots, let her. If she won't wear something weather appropriate, let her experience the natural consequences of doing so. If I felt it should be different I suggested "It is cold out side, so you might like to wear pants under your dress or shorts" Don't use "You have to...." if you can keep from doing so. If she still refuses tell her "OK you don't have to wear that but let's put it in your backpack so that you can put it on later if you choose too".

It took about 1 week of doing this and didn't have another problem after that. She got dressed when she was told and she got to pick out whatever she wanted.

Another thing I noticed with one of mine is that she has a hard time selecting anything if there are too many options. So I put all of her out of season clothes in another closet, but accessible. She may remember she has a summer outfit and want to wear it in the dead of winter, but usually it's out of site out of mind.

Hope some of that helps. I know it's challenging. They need to feel like they are in control, with actually letting them be in control.

I've seen many parents use a reward system for behavior modification, as opposed to disciplinary consequences. You might offer stickers or stars on a chart left in a visible place (such as the refrigerator)for when she accomplishes the desired behavior in the desired timeframe. When she gets 10 stars, she gets a reward that is meaningful to her... extra allowance, a second bedtime story, another hour of t.v., a sleepover, a new toy...whatever will motivate her to achieve the goal.
B.
www.toysofdiscovery.com

hi my name is J. and i'm haveing the same problem with my five year old and she also gives me problem's with her shoes it eather is to big or she wont's them tighter.she say i don't like it or it dose'nt match. when she brushes her teeth that's a task that should only take no more 10 min end up takeing 15 to 20 min by the time she's done fighting about all these things she start's on her hair and i don't even wont to start on that one.

Hi D.,
I would try limiting her options. You pick out two outfits adn let her choose between the two. You keep firm and she will have to make a choice. Good luck and have a great holiday!

Sounds like something else is going on - it can't possibly be just about the clothes. Talk to her and find out what's making her so anxious / self-conscious about what to wear.