6 Year Old's Behavior in Kindergarden

It does sound like he is having issues processing his feelings emotions (they categorize it under social/emotional development). I have a 6 yo boy and he does not, nor do the other boys in his class, act out to this extent. I agree, you need outside, professional help on how he can learn to become emotionally competent and learn to express his feelings and emotions without yelling, hitting, or opting out of a situation.
In this case the teacher is not expecting too much from him. she is expecting what she expects (and is getting) from all her other students.
I don't know if it is possible to have early intervention (ECI) come out and assess him, but give it a try. http://www.nj.gov/health/fhs/eis/
Also, look into a child phychologist to help him re-learn how to process his emotions and his responses to being asked to do new things.
Good luck. this is such a challenging situation and I applaud you for not dumping it off as being the fault of the system or the teacher.

I disagree that a Kindergartener should necessarily know how to read. Some kids read earlier and some later. The standard is 1st grade, but some kids take a little longer. That doesn't mean he has a learning disability.

Okay, first off, they aren't asking anything of 6 year olds today that they weren't asking 30 years ago. Children can sit properly, and they do get time to play outside.

I think your pediatrician is right. He needs to be fully evaluated by a psychologist. PART of his behavior is age related, but when it starts getting WAY abnormal in comparison to his peers, there is something going on.

So insist on a full physical and psychological evaluation. It will take multiple visits and lots of time, but it's worth it to know just what's going on and how you can help him.

Have you investigated any of the following:

Dislexya or other Learning Disabilities
Poor vision or hearing
Add
Depression

If you do not know the root of the issue you do not know how to help. I think by removing some of the above mentioned issue from the table (by testing for them) you are showing the school your initiative in solving the problem as well as actually trying to solve the problem. In the mean time I would simply ask the teacher if what she sees in class is appropriate to ask for the school to evaluate him for any extra help.

The best help I ever got for my son was to stop giving situations bandaides and to start looking for answers - I hope yours are less complex than mine.

The not reading yet and guessing makes me think there may be some kind of learning issue. See ifyou can get him evaluated. How frustrating would it be for him to be expected to know things if his brain isn't cooperating? Obviously his behavior isn't appropriate, BUT if there is a real REASON that he can't do the work besides "I don't want to" and he's not capable of explaining what's wrong, that has to be investigated. Good luck!

Well, M., I would take a two-part approach.

I think the idea of going to see a psychologist is a good one, even if only to rule out that there is a need in this realm. There might be something big going on for him, or not. This would be one way to find out.

The other thing I would do is to have him evaluated for vision issues with an ophthalmologist who screens for eye function/eye teaming. Vision disabilities (my son has some) are a hidden underlying factor in some learning disabilities. (For what it's worth, less than a year ago, we finally-- after seeing two speech therapists for nonverbal communication issues and then an occupational therapist-- finally got a diagnosis for our son who was five at the time. ) Please note that this is a bit more than just having his eyes checked for acuity; it's to make sure they are working together correctly. If this is the case, eye therapy can help. Here's more information on this:

http://pavevision.org/

Because we've addressed this, our son is reading and getting along fine in school, but does have a 504 plan for some modifications which we will use if need be.

I hope you find the answers you seek as you go forward.

Bribery usually works. Special treats after school if he is good. Find out want really pushes his buttons or what he is willing not to scrifice and use it. With my son it is video games, snacks and play dates. If he is bad we say no electronics for the day. He cannot play video games until he has done his homework or written his name, etc. If he is good I promise him a playdate or a pack of pokeman cards (very good times). This really works. ..and of course we are still a "work in progress". But, stick to your guns. A kid that has boundaries is usually a happier child. Best of luck. to you.

They expect too much of kids in school nowadays. 6 year olds should be playing, not made to sit for hours on end.

It is age related. Does your son read? We have a disruptive kid in our co-op. if he refuses to participate, his mom sends him off to read by himself.

He's 6 and not able to read? Have you had his vision checked? What about dyslexia? Sounds like he's very frustrated. Poor thing.

Did you check his vision and hearing? Also check for dyslexia. He might be frustrated if he is dealing with one of those issues and doesn't realize it.

find a paychologist.. go down that road for a while.. see if they can help him.

private school may not be for this child.. he may do better in a public schhol and perhaps not in a regular classroom...

I would suggest to the teacher starting a behavior chart that comes home at the end of the week. I did this for my oldest son in 1st grade. I even created the chart myself. It can be very simple and stress the positive. Maybe he could get a reward at home for it...and at school...like more computer time etc. I would also ask the teacher if she could give him some jobs in the classroom to make him feel important. Is there a school social worker? I would ask that he see her....maybe she will be able to encourage him too and give him a break from the classroom setting.

The kindergarten classrooms that I have been in are far friendlier for kids than the one I was in 30 years ago. WE are expected to sit still and learn.

The four I substitute in are amazing... the kids don't do any one activity fit more than fifteen to twenty minutes. They sing songs with full body movements to learn counting, colors, word groups etc. The go outside twice a day and also have either art, pe, or music (outside the classroom).

If the psychologist said it was just his age, find another one and get a second opinion.

Stay working close with his teachers so they know you are trying... That with give your soon more grace in their eyes if they know you are trying.

Would your presence in the classroom help or hurt? Ask the teacher. Maybe you could volunteer in his room help him mind better.

Good luck... Get a second opinion!!

Thid sounds crazy but have you had his eyes checked? He should be reading now and it sounds like he is very bright and if seat work is hard maybe he can't see it clear or he may have a tracking problem or even something like dyslexia. If he can't focus or see the work well he would be frustrated and he may noy even realize how he sees is wrong. I had a friend that didn't know he couldn't see clear and when he got his glasses he found out that trees had individual small leaves and not just 1 giant one. Please take him for an eye exam it may solve a lot of problems.

What do you mean when you say "They didn't teach him." Is that what he tells them?

It sounds like a behaviorial issue. I would come down hard and fast! If he's not going to do school work in school, then he'll do it at home. I would make up a bunch of school work and he would spend the entire weekend in his room doing school work. If he wants playtime, he has to earn it. He is not earning it so he doesn't get it.

He needs to learn that school is the priorty and NOTHING else happens until school work is done (even if it means you have to stay home all weekend every weekend!)

So why haven't you taken him to the psychologist? Do you have insurance that would cover it? If not you could possibly find one at a local college of medicine or something.

It can make all the difference in the world when you have a diagnosis so you know which way to go.

I have taken him to the psychologist under the advice of his pediatrician. According to psychologist, he ruled out ADD or ADHD at least for the time being. He said it's age appropriate. Impulse control issues, age appropriate. I am going to have him evaluated by the school study team, I think. Let's see what they say and we'll take it from there. Nope, they will not the say all,end all however. I will follow up with docs if needed to ensure that we do what is in his best interest.