6 Year Old Throwing Fits like a 2 Year Old

I would probably have made him leave the friend's house immediately -- so the consequences are immediate to the behavior.

I have also had success with my 5 year old focusing on the positive - when my son does what I want, I give him high fives, pick him up and hug him, sing him songs. Tell him ahead of time that he can expect a treat (a favorite song, a story, a lollipop, some small thing he likes -- for a lot of behaviors, I just promise 10 high-fives). And when he does what he should, really go over the top on praise. It may feel sort of strange, but it has really worked for me. I've been surprised to find it a more effective a tool than scolding and threats (and much more pleasant for both of us).

My daughter is also turning 6 in May and we've had some similar issues. I haven't done a lot of reading about this, but I think it's pretty normal to see some regression and very difficult behavior right before they turn six. I do agree that during this time you need to still let your child know what your expectations are and if they need to lose t.v. or privileges that is a natural consequence. I know this advice is counter intuitive, and it doesn't work for times like when you need to leave a playdate, but in other instances I have found that the more I let my daughter have "control" over things the more easy going she is about the other times I tell her no. I'm just looking at the next couple of months as sort of a survival mode with her and I'm hoping that things will settle down after the sixth birthday. Good luck!

Excuse your child's behavior to the other parent, then grab your son, shoes on or not and drag his butt to the car. You show him WHO is in charge and that you mean buisness. He can put his shoes on in the car or not wear them it won't hurt. Then don't let him have a playdate for awhile. When he get's home make him sit on the stairs or in a chair or in timeout and think about his behavior and he's old enough to sit for 20min.- to a 1hour and think about. My daughter is 7 and for serious things we go longer than a 7min. time out. My daughter knows if she embarasses me like that she's in for it once were in the car, I'll chew her out and lecture her All........the way home. Taking things away from my daughter doesn't phase her but having a dissapointed peed off mom really get's to her.

The consequence needs to be immediate and directly related to the behavior. So if he is acting badly at a friend's house, don't threaten him with loss of TV. It is too far in the future and in his mind has absolutely nothing to do with the moment. I agree with the posters who say the consequence needs to be immediate removal from his playdate. He may have one warning but no bargaining after that. Especially since you stated the expectations ahead of time.

Before anymore incidents, start "love flooding". Hug him more, snuggle him more, spend more time letting him know how much you love him. No conditions or "but...." just tons of unconditional love. It is powerful. And when kids feel more loved and secure they start listening more. I find my son goes through one really tough period every year (usally starting a few weeks before his birthday). So remember to hang in there and this too shall pass.