5-Year Old Wants to Change Underwear for Every Bathroom Trip

Updated on October 08, 2010
L.L. asks from Sharon, MA
5 answers

My son recently started to have a strange behavior of demanding to change underwear each time after bathroom trip, 'cause he said the underwear is wet, I checked, maybe just one or two drips. My husband told him it's common for boys to have a little urine coming out after wee-wee, then he asked for bathroom tissue to wipe dry, and he wipes it really hard, like that's the only way to ease his worry. That just seems to be so strange to me. I don't want him to have this habit carried on, he will be laughed at in school locker-room later. We told him it's ok, we tried to distract him with sth else, nothing works. We tried the hard way, prevent him to reach for tissue, and order him to put back the "a little wet" underwear, which only made him throw a fit or cry very bad. Another thing we noticed (also started recently), that when he puts on day cloth or change to PJ, or get dressed after bath, he always pushes down his little wee-wee, when we ask him what he's doing, he said "I just want to get it flat". It's like he's not comfortable with the way he is, my husband keeps telling him all boys including daddy are like that, it's normal. But he's still doing it.

Is this strange? I'm so desperately to find out how I can get him out of this strange behavior, maybe it's time to teach him recognize his body parts appropriately? Should I take him to a doc?

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So What Happened?

Thank you so much for all of your response so quickly. This helps a great deal. Coming from a culture that used to keep anything sex related highly secretive to kids, both my husband and I are very nervous how to handle this with our own. I didn't even realize I was over-reacting until I read your comments, thank you so much, I'll put some underwears in his bathroom drawer tonight and check out some books from library this weekend.

More Answers

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J.O.

answers from Chicago on

He should know the names of his body parts If he wants clean fresh underpants on let him put them on underwear is cheap. As for the tp at school is in preschool or kindergarten? Most schools have urinals for boys with no TP in site so relax. As for after the bath let him dress in private he is 5 and can get dressed by himself. Everyone is unique and has quarts and things we have to work on some things done in private like changing underwear if there is a few drops of pee on them are personal things and no one needs to know.
Get through this year and worry about 14 when he is closer to that age. Good Luck!
J. O
Mom to 5 well almost 6

1 mom found this helpful
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B.H.

answers from Philadelphia on

My 5 1/2 yr old has been doing this since she turned 4. It made me crazy for a while, but what can you do? We purchased extra undies and try to be sure there are always several pair clean. Now that she is in school all day, we are down to only 1-2 changes vs. the 5-6 we were dealing with. I'm actually glad to see someone else's child is doing the same thing :-) It will likely get better.

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I think you're over-reacting. is there a hamper or chute in your bathroom? Just stash some fresh undies in there for him to have handy. At school he's going to be out of luck though!
As for his "fear adjustment" he's just getting used to it and maybe he's had erections & knows that it's uncomfortable so he's checking to make sure "all is well" and yes, he should know correct terminology for his body parts at 5!

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T.M.

answers from Philadelphia on

My daughter is 6. She has a problem where she leaks. I let her put on fresh panties whenever she needs to. We even have a pair in her school bag....just in case. They are still so little.

L.B.

answers from Biloxi on

Your son is perfectly normal!

My boy used a square of tissue to wipe after urinating for years - if it makes your son comfortable and he is not irritating the area from wiping go ahead and let him use the tissue. As for positioning his "wee-wee" they all go through a phase where they have to find the way it is most comfortable for them. At this age they are noticing more about their bodies and it is natural for them to feel uncertain/uncomfortable about it all. You and your husband should talk to him about his body parts - using the correct terminology - if you show that you are comfortable with it then he will be comfortable.

Don't worry about the school locker room - I assume at this age he is not changing for gym class so no worries now about that. Once he is, then he will realize that other boys don't change everything during school.

He is fine. I agree with the other response - put a stack of undies in the bathroom, let him change however often he likes and go from there.

~Peace

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