4 Yr Old Constantly Having Accidents

I can't address your main problem, however I am currently potty training our twins and I know about the problem with stinky clothes after an accident. What I do so I can do all that laundry once a day or every other day is this: I keep a bucket full of water and a healthy dose of oxyclean on a high shelf in my Laundry room. Any wet or stinky clothes go right in there. When I do laundry I pour the whole bucket into the washer, dirty water and all and rinse the bucket. The oxyclean by itself does a good job of cleaning the clothes and keeping doewn the smell.

get those rubber/plastic pants and have him keep them on weither he peed pooped or not. hopefully he wont like it. you might not like spanking but thats also an option that we use on occation when its happened three times in one day (my daughter is also 4).

First thing is to get his doctor to make sure nothing is physically wrong. Boys in particular seem to be harder to train, and many children have trouble with night training because they don't get strong enough "signals" from their bodies to wake them up. Perhaps the same thing is going on during the day. Second, my son didn't fully potty train for pooping until he was almost 4. What his doctor recommended was a 20 day plan where the goal is to condition his body to go shortly after eating. You get 20 small prizes, trinkets, candy, whatever and seal them into 20 individual brown bags so the prize can't be seen. Put them all into a basket or box so he can see the bags while he is on the toilet. Then about 10-15 minutes after every meal, he has to sit on the potty for 10 minutes. Use a timer that he can see count down. Make sure he is sitting comfortably, because he must be relaxed for the bodily function to work right. The goal is not for him to necessarily go each time, but train his body to be ready to go after eating. Let him see the basket but not touch. When the timer goes off, he gets to pick out a bag. Do this for at least 20 days, and you should see some improvement IF you send him to the bathroom after every meal. With peeing, just set a schedule and stick with it, to go try every half hour, 45 minutes, etc. Peeing is easier to condition to be regular because they can't hold pee for as long. Try to be neutral and encouraging, and hopefully his body will respond and it will become regular like clockwork. As far as the pullups go, you could try to use them like underwear to protect his clothes and your house while following the above plan. It may help your sanity while the 20 days tick by. ;-) Good luck!

i feel your pain. my older son did this. the only things to do is #1 make sure he isn't constipated as even one painful bowel movement can cause a kid to hold it for several weeks per fear of it hurting when he goes on the potty and #2 praise successes, ignore failures emotionally...no reaction....but just clean it up and or have him help not as punishment but as a natural and unavoidable consequence. the less constipated he is and the less reactive you are the better~ if he htinks this is something you are upset about believe me....it will prolong it!~

It sounds like you have so much going on that maybe he is using it as a way to get attention and interaction. Try to engage him more throughout the day while at home. Make sure it is positive interaction. Good luck!

I'm going through the same issue with my 4 year old and have found that having him clean up after himself is helping. Also, we do "potty practice" for about 4 minutes where he sits on the toilet and practices how to use the bathroom. That way, he doesn't feel going in his pants is faster than using the toilet. Sometimes I feel he just doesn't want to miss out on the fun he is having and take a break. Also, you might want to talk with his pediatrician to make sure there aren't any health-related issues. For example, diabetes can lead to wetting and constipation can lead to pooping accidents. Good Luck!

I have two suggestions. One is to have HIM wash out his dirty underwear and clothes (as best as a 4 year old can)in a laundry sink or big bucket before you launder them in the washing machine. If your son is anything like my 2 boys, he'll think it's disgusting! Kids don't mind making a mess, but most hate having to actually clean it up. This may motivate him to use the toilet. As hard as it may be, don't let him see you upset about his accidents. Act very "matter-of-fact" about it and take him directly to the bucket/sink or whatever area you set up for HIM to clean the clothes. It will be time consuming at first, but may be worth it to stop the behavior.
Second, make time, with your husband's help, to spend one on one time with him without your daughter. He sees all the attention she gets (through diaper changes, feedings, getting dressed, etc..)and he may be jealous that you do all those things for her, but he is expected to do those things for himself because he's a "big boy". During your one on one time, ask him how he feels. Help him to find the words to describe his emotions. Look at a photo album with him of pictures of him as a baby and remind him of all the things you used to do for him. Reassure him that you still love him and will still help him when needed, even though he's bigger. Hope this helps!