4 Year Old Spitting Help

Updated on March 27, 2013
A.E. asks from Waukee, IA
10 answers

I know it is not ok to spit or act like you are spitting at preschool she has started to do this at home. How do you fix this?

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So What Happened?

Thanks this lasted about 2 days and that was it. I said girls don't do this and we do not spit. Babies do not big girls.
Sending to room and the stairs is what we did FREQUENTLY and daddy and I were downstairs having fun so didn't last long.
Thanks for the advise and will keep these in mind.
Soap on the toungue was my next idea, just like if I said a bad word growing up it didn't happen much soap is nasty! :)

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C.B.

answers from San Francisco on

I would take 2 fingers and pop her on the mouth then make her clean it up and then go sit in time out. She needs to understand that spitting on people is called gassing and it's a crime!

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M.T.

answers from New York on

My mother soaped my mouth 40+ years ago. I never spit again.

3 moms found this helpful

R.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

Discipline for bad behavior. What consequences for doing it do you have in place?

2 moms found this helpful

C.W.

answers from Lynchburg on

Hi A.-

For me, this would be an IMMEDIATE time out...four minutes...period (no crying/carrying on...or the clock RE STARTS).

Then, once time out was over, I would make her wipe it up.

So gross.

So intolerable.

Then, I would make a concerted effort to find out what made her (YUCK) spit...and try to give her 'words' for her feelings. Role play...and repeat.

Hope this helps!
michele/cat

2 moms found this helpful
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R.R.

answers from Dallas on

My sister's classic answer to her two sons spitting on each other. She handed them each a cup and made them stand at the sink and told them to spit in the cups until they were full. Obviously an impossible task, but they ended up crying and sputtering and she made them keep right on spitting until she thought they got the point. I'm not talking 10 or 12 total spits, no, I mean she made them spit probably 50 or 60 times. They NEVER spit again.

2 moms found this helpful
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B.F.

answers from Dallas on

Do you mean it? Act like it.

Swift disapline. Every.time. You know what she values. If its friends over - that's not happening. If its a birthday party - you're not going. If its TV - you're not watching. Early bedtime?

Look for a book to reinforce it. Mrs. Piggle Wiggle was one of my favorites.

Of course this is only effective if you have a relationship with your child and are not just handing out punishments.
Rules - relationship = rebellion.

2 moms found this helpful
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S.H.

answers from St. Louis on

never lose your cool. Stay calm, but forceful.....& make it clear it's unacceptable. & Make her clean it up.

with my daycare, it's a "not nice" behavior....which means timeout in addition to cleaning up the mess, apologizing to the friend, etc. Oh, & confession to the parent! Manners!

2 moms found this helpful

B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

Spitting is for when you are brushing your teeth and have to spit the toothpaste out.
Or if you have a bug in your mouth.
It's never for spitting at anyone.
You can put her in time out when ever she does it.
My Mom use to wash our mouths out with soap - she had a bar of Ivory soap set aside just for that purpose.

1 mom found this helpful
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H.W.

answers from Portland on

In our house, 'spitting is just as bad as hitting'. For adults, it's considered battery to spit on someone. All things considered, we are pretty conservative, discipline-wise.

My son did this to a friend while waiting in line to go into preschool, about two years ago. (He was just four.) Because the other child was familiar with me (I had been a former caregiver to her), I had him to do the check-in with her, and helped her tell him "I don't like that". At the time, I made him sit down over to the side until all the other kids went into the preschool-- time out on the spot.

That was all it took. For home, I would have given time out the first time and then time out/removal of privileges for further incidents. In your case, think hard. I'd find things which matter to her: no playdates if we are spitting anywhere other than the sink or a tissue. No tv/media time.

Is she spitting AT people? Then, big time out (like 20 minutes in her room, cannot be out with others). A lot of adults think that sending them to their room is not enough punishment because they might play, but I've learned that usually, it is. They very much want connection with us. Isolation for short amounts of time might work, or as I mentioned, no playdates or no privileges.

(I do like the idea of spitting to fill up a cup, though. Hadn't thought of that one!)

1 mom found this helpful

C.V.

answers from Columbia on

I'm with Mindy. If your mouth is so dirty that you have to spit or swear, you need it cleaned out. With soap. Every time.

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