4 Week Old Sleeps Better on Tummy!

Personally, I couldn't do it. There are about 2,500 deaths a year due to SIDS and I don't want to be a mom of any of those kids. Since they did the back to sleep campaign in the 1980's the cases of SIDS has dropped by 50%. I have friends who put their babies to sleep on their tummies and have no problems, but I just couldn't do it. I tend to think of the worst case possible and to know if I lost my daughter and I could have prevented it, that would eat away at me every day for the rest of my life. That's just me.

I have four children. Two were born when we put babies to sleep on their tummies and two were "back to sleep". I agree babies sleep better on their tummies. Also true the SIDS rate has dramatically fallen with the back to sleep movement. SIDS is a diagnosis of exclusion. Meaning when a baby dies and no other cause is found it is said the baby died of SIDS. Threfore SIDS is likely to be a grab bag of reasons for the death. The babies who died sleeping on their tummies - some probably died of suffocation or rebreathing CO2 and others of true "SIDS". Traditionally in this country we put our babies to sleep on their tummies because we thought it would prevent choking. Other countries at that same time put their children to sleep on their backs. (My mother-in-law, from Japan, always put my first born to sleep on his back which drove me crazy) The choking reason for sleep position has not held up, except for infants with severe reflux. There are babies who have "gone down" in front of their paramedic, physician, or nurse parent and CPR has been initiated immediately. The true SIDS cases don't respond - probably something in the brain that was always there quits working. So the question you have to ask yourself if your child died of SIDS while sleeping on his tummy is it worth the lifetime of guilt? (All mothers feel guilty when something goes wrong with their child whether they did or didn't do something). For me, it was back to sleep.

Hi, M.--I really empathize with your concern. You are observing your baby's needs and trying to do the best thing for him, not necessarily for the "statistical norm". Please don't ignore his needs in there! I would try putting him down on his tummy and once he is asleep turning him onto his back and see if he learns to stay asleep there--that way you can let him fall asleep comfortably, but when he sleeps longer intervals (and you will sleep during those, too, right?) you won't be as worried about him. If it is too disruptive and he can't stay asleep, please remember that statistics are only that--while they represent broad groups of data, they are not individual children. Of course you want to protect him as well as you can! (Which, to my mind, means vaccinating him, because more children die of pertussis these days than of SIDS, but that is MY viewpoint and doesn't have to be yours.) Doctors are obligated to operate on statistical probabilities in order to do the most good for the most people, but, as Dr. Spock's first sentence read in my edition, "Relax--you know more than you think you do." Nobody can know that child as well as you do already. Good luck.

Liv,

Whatever you do, don't put him to sleep on his stomach! He is at extreme risk for SIDS and even if you are right there, I would not put your baby to sleep on his stomach at all. Even at this age as you have found, he has found his preference. Nip it in the bud before its too late. Try swaddling him before bed and then put him to sleep on his back.

Good luck.

Molly

The truth is, your putting your child at risk of DEATH. I have a good friend who lost her little boy due to SIDS. He was very strong, full term, healthy, and could lift his head. Years later she still blames herself for putting him to sleep on his tummy.

If you MUST put him on his tummy, please look into an Angelcare Monitor. It's a mat monitor that a child lays on and it can detect breathing.

Hi M.-

My daughter is 7.5 months old. I thought she did not like swaddling - I was wrong. Finally a friend came over one day when I was mid swaddle and showed me how tight to do it. This was when she was 4 weeks old. Instantly my daughter became calm in about 60 seconds - did the 4 s's. Shhhhing, swaddling, swaying and sucking (binky) she started sleeping through the night at 8 weeks. You are obviously going to have to do what is within your comfort zone. But instead of aggreeing with you or disagreeing with you I wanted to share what worked for me.

I hope you find something that works for you.

Hi M.. My son was the same way, now eight months I let him sleep on his tummy, actually he'll roll to his tummy. Since he wouldn't ever sleep on his back and if he did it was less than 2 hours, I put him in his infant carrier and guess what, he slept, not just 2 hours but sometimes up to 5 hours by the time he was 4 months old. Might want to try that.

I would like to start off by saying that I know exactly how you feel because I went through this same thing with my son. My baby is a preemie and was in the NICU for 3 weeks, where they slept him on his tummy the whole time. When he first came home he was ok to sleep on his back as long as he was swaddled (he was born in December) but after about 7 weeks of age he was done with the swaddling and the only way that he would sleep well was on his tummy. I was very nervous at first and actually referred to myself as a bad mommy because I slept him on his tummy but than I realized that he needed good sleep so that he would be healthy and grow. He also was able to raise his head up well. I remember turning the monitor volume up really loud so that I could hear him breathing but after a few nights I started to feel easier about it and now Nathan is almost 6 months and he still insists on sleeping on his tummy. If you want to feel even more secure about sleeping him on his tummy there is a monitor at Babies-R-Us that you place under the baby and it detects any absence of breathing and alarms. I think it costs around $90. The only regret that I have of sleeping Nathan on his tummy is that once he learned to roll over to his back and couldn't roll back over to his tummy he used to wake up because he didn't know how to sleep on his back. As far as the SIDS concern went I turned on his ceiling fan to help keep the air circulating (it was more just to make me feel better). I hope that this helps and if you do choose to sleep your little one on his back jsut know that you are not the only mom that has done it and you are not a "bad" mommy you are just a loving mommy.

Hello M.,

I agree with Melissa, do your own research and make up your own mind. I just want to let you know something, that is not politically correct.
The whole campaign sleeping on the back against SIDS is not based an cause and effect logic, but on statistics. More infants who were sleeping on their belly died from unknown reasons than infants sleeping on their back. It doesn't mean that the children died because they were sleeping on their belly, something else had to cause the arrest of breath. The " prone" position ( laying on the belly) seems to be another factor in the whole equation of SIDS, but is not the main cause for suffocation. Scientists are still searching for the real reason of SIDS, and are coming up with new hypothesis, like for example genetic temporary malfunction of the respiratory system.
As parents we take chances all the time wiht our children, trying to do the best, but often what used to be the rule for a generation becomes what's to avoid later, like let a baby cry for example. Parenting can be very confusing, and sometimes we have to rely on our own intuition.
By the way, the "prone" position is anatomically the most natural position for an infant, and is necessary for the baby to build up his/her strength that will allow him/her to progessively raise from the ground and later on sit up, get up and finally walk.
I'm a mother, who's been confused many times as well as a certified Infant Developmental Movement Educator, and I was very carefull to give the opportunity to my son when he was a baby to experience the 4 positions ( prone, supine and both sides) for playing, resting and even sleeping.
Whatever you do, have fun with your little one!

Ask your pediatrician, do some research and do what "feels" right to you. Trust your instinct as a mother. My 2 year old Max was a horrible sleeper from day one. We finally hired a sleep specialist and she said he would sleep better on his tummy. I was really worried about this but sure enough he started sleeping through the night on his belly. He's also a headbanger which is extra scary. Anyway, he's now 2 years old and has slept on his tummy since he was 11 weeks old. I think every mother should talk to their pediatrician, do some research and make an informed decision. There is a lot of information out there about SIDS and tummy sleeping, pros and cons, do the research online. It took me a while to be "okay" with our decision to let Max sleep on his tummy but if that's what you think is best, you'll get there. Besides, I have a happy, funny, intelligent toddler who gets an average of 11+ hours of sleep at night and a 2 hour nap each day. He's pretty darn happy which makes me happy that I let him sleep on this tummy! Good luck!!

M.,

I wouldn't worry about putting your son to sleep on his tummy. I know it's not the fashion now, but when my son was born, in 1982, everyone put their babies to sleep on their stomachs. This was done for decades, so I think if you have a firm mattress and don't cover his face with a blanket, you (and he) should be fine.

E.

I know it is not recommended but I put my 1 month old to sleep on his tummy, and he slept so much better and longer- he could also lift his head, so I felt comfortable placing him on his tummy to sleep- have a monitor to keep tabs on him while he sleeps, and check on him periodically until you feel he is safe. I think it is fine, and I have heard from some pediatricians that they did the same with their children, although they could not recommend it. My son is now 10 months old and goes to sleep on his tummy and usually rolls himself over to his back at some point in the night. During our mother's generation it was recommended for babies to sleep on their tummies to avoid choking, so there is no right answer- if ti works for you and your baby go for it!

M. -

I just want to say that a lot of times these questions turn into a war between opinions, I think you have some very extreme views here, and you don't need to hear mine too. But what I do want to say is that you need to do your research and make informed decisions (based on facts, not others opinions). I only say this because, being a mom is very emotional and we all get very defensive because we feel like if someone disagrees they are calling us bad moms. Everyone mothers differently and you need to do what you can be happy with. There are possible consequences to all the decisions we make, and if you can face consequences and still feel like you did the best you could, then do whatever works.

The most important thing you can do for your son is learn to not care what others think. I know we like to get opinions, and maybe find resources from other people, but we have to do our own research andmake our own decisions. If I decide to do what anyone says to do, and it backfires, I can't go back to them and get mad at them. That's why you have to decide for you!

I am sure you are a great mom! WE all get a little crazy during lack of sleep times, and any time when our new borns can't tell us what they want! Don't stress, do a little researching, get your doctors opinion, talk to you hubby (or whoever) and make a choice you guys can be happy with! I am sure you will be fine :-)

Good Luck!
M. P.

P.S. If you are concerned about the choking on spit-up thing when sleeping on back, you could get a crib elevator. If that is even one of your concerns! Again, good luck, and just be confident in your ability as his ONLY mommmy!!! :-)

My little girl was the same way. She is 6 months old now and has been very strong from the beginning. When I tried having her sleep on her back, she would flail her arms and scare herself. So I did the same as you, have her nap on her stomach during the day and watch her carefully to make sure she was OK. I had the same fears about her sleeping on her tummy during the night, but she did so well! She slept much longer and she has been sleeping on her tummy ever since. If you really feel uncomfortable about it then don't do it. But if he does well during the day sleeping like that, he will probably do just was well at night.

I came across this very interesting article when researching crib mattresses re SIDS and info coming out of New Zealand. It explains why putting your baby on its back to sleep may help reduce SIDS but it is amazing (if true) by how much SIDS has been decreased in NZ by the use of mattress covers and suggests that if used sleeping on the front would be fine!

http://www.healthychild.com/cribdeathcause.htm

C.

M.,
Don't be SCARED!!
I know the SIDS thing is so incredibly scary,but I have 2 grown children who both slept on their tummy..Also, I have been in the childcare business for 22 years and have seen the pros and cons to MAKING a child sleep on their back..They really don't get much sleep if they are not secure on their back, thus making scheduling for sleep difficult, along with a cranky baby..Do what makes him comfortable, and if he is a big boy with head control I say go for it..If it makes you feel better, turn up the volume on the monitor if you have one, or check him a little more often.
It has been my experience that while on their backs, they tend to flail in their their sleep (normal) which wakes them up when their hands go flying. Pretty much the reason why they are insecure on their backs.
Bigger guys with neck control really should be fine on their tummy, it is so important for them to sleep and for you to get the break too..

my son was the same. i always made him sleep on his back unless he was having a hard time falling asleep, and then i would let him fall asleep on his tummy and then flip him over. wait like fifteen minutes so he's really asleep.

I'd check with your pedi, but once your baby is big enough to roll over, there's no stopping where he'll sleep because if he wants to be on his tummy, he'll just roll over! I'd try putting him down on his back, but if he rolls, let him be! I know the back to sleep stuff, but I come from several generations of tummy sleepers and my kids both slept better on their tummies. I always put them down on their backs, but once they were rolling, they just rolled to where they were more comfy---always their tummies! They have both turned out to like to sleep on their backs now, but at first, they seemed to like their tummies better. If you do decide to go that way, make sure that either there's no bumper pads or anything in their beds but maybe one lovie so they can't get hurt! Good luck and happy sleeps!

THough the experts of today would say "never" We have two babies now 4 months old. One of them just prefered sleeping on the tummy. She is fine and well rested. We were concerned about her in the night. So we set up a co- sleeper to respond if needed promptly. When she wakes up she let us know when she was ready to be off the belly.
I thin if he is sleeping well, let him sleep. Just be close by if he needs you, I am sure he will let you know.

Hi M.,
Our son was the same way. From birth he could turn his head laying on his stomach and he slept so much better from the get go on his tummy. The decision is really yours to make as my husband and I had to with all that is out there in regards to sleeping on the tummy and SIDS. I hope this helps and good luck.
Sara

Talk to your doctor about it. He/she can help you decide. One of my sons (now 6yo) slept better on his stomach than back. It turned out that he had reflux, which is aggravated when laying flat on the back. If reflux is the problem, you could try raising the head-side of the crib or mattress an inch, so that he is not laying perfectly flat. I think you can buy a wedge-shaped sleep positioner that does this also.

We did end up letting our son sleep on his stomach. Even then, he woke up frequently, but it was the only way he (and I) got any sleep at all.

M.-
Our son (now 12 months old) has slept on his tummy since we brought him home from the hospital at 2 days old. He slept so much better and has slept through the night since 8 weeks old. When he was 'brand new,' I'd sleep him on his tummy in his bassinet and have him in the living room, kitchen, etc. where I could see him. I watched him sleep for a while to make sure that he was safe on his tummy. He was absolutely fine. I would suggest that you keep an eye on him for a while if you do decide to tummy sleep him. Make sure that he is able to safely move his head. Best of luck! :)

Both of my girls wanted to sleep on their backs, but I would not allow them until they were rolling themselves over. I was just too worried and I did not want to regret it. So here is what I did do for them:
1. I put them to sleep on their side using a sleep positioner firmly in place. This prevented them from rolling forward on to their tummy. They slept much better on their side and i just rotated sides so their head was not weird on one side. This worked really well for my 1st.
2. My second was a bit pickier in the beginning. She was only happy sleeping propped up on her back or on her tummy on top me of my husband. So we got very good at using a boppy and towels under neath it to create the perfect support and incline for sleeping. We then used blankets (winter time)tucked tigthly around her that kept her in place (sort of like swaddling around the boppy). This worked great for about 12 weeks. Then when she moved around more, we used a boppy newborn lounger (like a boppy but filled-in in the middle), wedged at the correct angle of her preference. It was fit very snug inside the bassinet so she could not move it or fall off. She slept on that for a while until she learned to be comfortable sleeping on her side in the sleep positioner.

Once my girls were rolling over, they both ended up on their stomach. My 2 year old still mostly sleep on her tummy and my older daughter falls asleep on her back now.

good luck!

When my little boy was a baby he also sleep on his tummy. He would fling his arm and wake himself up all the time. When we did put him on his tummy he sleep much better. I'm usually around when I put him to sleep and feel very safe.

At night we put the bassinet right next to my bed and never have any problem.

I feel you have to do what is right for you and your family. As for us, we were really happy, he's much happier when he get uninterupted sleep.

Good luck.

Just check out www.sids.org & get informed before you make your decision. True that many of us survived being put to sleep on our tummies, but the decrease of 50% of SIDS related deaths since the 'back to sleep' campaign began does say a lot. I have 5 children, one of my 6-month old twins rolls over and sleeps on her tummy. I just roll her back over, I cannot be there & freaking out over it every time she is on her tummy, but I do try to do what I feel is in her best interest and put her on her back again. I know a woman whose neice put her baby on her tummy with a blanket over her head. I think that is awful and dangerous, the baby is over 2 years old now and just fine. So putting a baby to sleep on the tummy does not mean they will die, and putting them on their back does not guarantee they won't. We can only do what we believe is best and try not to beat ourselves up over every decision we make! Nor can we let others dictate what we do. But it is our responsibility to check out the information and not disregard statistics.
You will do fine by your baby, you love him and he needs and loves you. Happy motherhood to you.
Blessings,
D.

My daughter had a long stay in the hospital after she was born and they always ahd her lying on her stomach. The difference with that is they had monitors on her. When we brought her home at 3 months old, she only would sleep on her tummy. We knew it wasn't right, but that was the only way that she would get adequate sleep with out waking up.
We used the little swaddler thing (that has 2 triangular shaped foam pads on both sides of where the baby lays)and kind of left her on her stomach but kinda favored her side. We started to turn her a little more on her side each night. And by a week, she was winged of the tummy sleeping!

Having a 2 month old sleeping on his back I am in constant worry more about him choking on his spit (he was a silent gagger when he was a newborn, VERY freaky) then I am of him on his belly getting SIDS. Do what is right for you and your son. Even if it means waking up every few hours to check on him, to ease your nerves.

My son can roll himself BACK over onto his back at his age, so i do not worry (not swaddled). Plus he cries when he can't get back to his back or gets frustrated being on his tummy. This makes it easier for me to not worry too much about him being on his tummy.

Try just putting him on his tummy during nap times. See how he does. Heck when I was an infant my mom would put me on my tummy and I am alive today. Sometimes I feel Dr's put more fear in us then needed. I was terrifed of the most simple things with my son, it sucked. Made it impossible to enjoy his presence in the same room.

Use your best judgement. We only can do our best. How I see it, my son could pass by choking on his spit to passing due to SIDS. Either way, life has a plan, and we can only do so much to protect our kid(s).

Instead of worrying so much, enjoy!!!!! I know, easier said then done. Being a NEW mom, i understand first hand.

Good luck and we all have our preferences as to what is right or wrong. Ultimately, its your choice, its your nerves, its YOUR child!!!

I know you've gotten a lot of advise, so I'm just going to say what worked for me... and my sanity! I put my son to sleep on tummy at 3 weeks old. He has always slept on his tummy (like his mommy & daddy), we've never had a problem, and that's the only way he WOULD sleep until he started rolling over. He would actually wake up crying in the middle of the night because he had rolled onto his back and couldn't roll back over.

If you're really worried about it, there are special motion detection pads that you can buy to put under your baby that beeps if baby doesn't move for so many seconds. These are very sensitive and pick up even baby's breathing.

Good luck, and know that usually Mom knows best when it comes to your own kids! And remember... about 30 years ago, Docs were telling parents that their babies HAD to sleep on their tummies! (most likely to avoid choking on spit-up)

You know my son who is now 15 months never really like to sleep on his back. He started sleeping on his tummy at 3 months. At that point he could hold his head up and he would tilt his head but he would take longer naps and not wake up startled. I was freaked out though when I found out my sitter put him on his tummy and so he got used it and he was okay. I used to put the monitor and check on him alot just to be sure but as long as he can lift his head i think he should be fine. I mean eventually he will learn to roll over and be okay.

I say do what you feel is right. Monitor him and possibly get one of those baby monitors that have the breathing sensors. My son never really liked sleeping on his back (I was actually afraid of him choking on his spit up while sleeping and suffocating in the middle of the night) so I put him on his side to sleep. I just alternated sides each night so he didn't get a flat head. He was fine with it and I knew he'd be ok if he spit up.

Take care.

L.

HI M.,

I agree with the folks that say trust your motherly instincts. With our first born we followed back to sleep and she was not a great sleeper. Could have been a coincidence. As soon as she was able she slept on her belly. Our son was born early and slept on his belly in the NICU and on. He has some developmental delays and when I talked to the physical therapist about concerns I had about him sleeping on his stomach she told me that they actually see more kids with delays because they are put on their back too much. It was her opinion that the frequency on SIDS and the back to sleep movement was due to thick mattresses and blankets in beds with babies. After that I never worried about our son another day. He's perfect now and has been a fabulous sleeper.

Trust what you are comfortable with.

Good luck and joy your sweet little one!

When my daughter was a baby I kept her on her back and she couldn't sleep. So during naps I tried putting her on her belly and it worked. I would check her all the time. I then got comfortable enough to do it at night time and she slept through the night much better than any other position. She is now 7 and almost always sleeps on her back! : )

It's a fact babies are more comfortable sleeping on their stomachs. There has been a lot of interesting info coming out lately (especially from New Zealand where SIDS is practically nonexistant now) about wrapping your mattress. It is thought that the toxic fumes present in most mattresses are what make some babies stop breathing, not lack of neck strength. It might be worth googling this and wrapping your little one's mattress so you can let him sleep on his tummy with less concern.

My daughter was a tummy sleeper and did just fine. I realize the current data suggests that it is dangerous, but like your son, my daughter could lift her head and was happier on her tummy, so we let it be.

M., I know the doctors say not to put your kids to sleep on their tummy, but I know where you are. Both of my kids slept better on their tummies too. I won't say that doctors don't know what they are talking about, but SIDS is what it is- SUDDEN INFANT DEATH SYNDROM. They don't know what causes it, there are no medical explainations for it. Is he in the same room with you? Do you use a baby monitor? How heavy do you sleep? They had me so freaked out about it with our first child (on top of which my oldest brother died of SIDS when he was 2 months old), she slept on my chest for about 6 weeks. I couldn't bare to put her down. I think as long as you are close and montitoring him you'll both be ok. Lots of babies sleep better on their tummies.

Good luck!

It all depends on the baby. You know if your baby is strong enough.

My babies were both tummy sleepers and were fine. I was scared with the 1st one, so we didn't put him on his tummy until he was like 4 weeks old. The difference was just amazing.

My son has slept on his tummy since he was 1 week old. Doctors don't know what they are talking about.... not too long ago they told moms to put their babies on their tummies in case they spit up in their sleep so they wouldn't choke. (To me that makes more sense). What doctors don't tell you is that your child is at the GREATEST risk for SIDS right after a vaccination. The chemicals in the vaccines will attack the nervous system and it sets them back in the motor development. So even though you stated that your son can lift his head, you would see an abrupt difference in his muscle strength and coordination.
I have never been concerned with my son sleeping on his tummy. I do not smoke and am not vaccinating. I did not use blankets or toys in the crib until the last couple of weeks. We all have positions that we like to sleep in and some that we have a hard time falling asleep in... no matter how hard we try. Babies are no different.
My son hated being swaddled. He would just lay on his back and cry but the minute I flipped him over he'd fall asleep!

My daughter always slept better on her tummy, although I never would have known that had my mom not put her in that position for naps. It used to drive me crazy, but she would sleep so much better and longer then on her back. At night, I put her on her side to sleep, and that seemed to work. She started sleeping through the night at 6 weeks old. She is 13 months now and sleeps in all three postions well.

When I had my kids you wrre supposed to put them on their tummies to sleep but now I guess they think it is a SIDS risk so I would say do as they recommend and you will adjust to the lack of sleep or get a co sleeper that attaches to your bed so you can comfort him back to sleep.

Both of my children preferred to sleep on their tummies all the time. I pretty mush ignored the conventional wisdom and let them, figuring that if they were content, so was I. Now 4, they are just fine. Don't worry about it.

M.,
I hate saying this, but do what you feel is right. I had twins my first time around and they HATED their backs. I tried to put them first on their tummy to fall asleep and then roll them over, I tried their sides and it all failed. So I resorted to their tummies around 6 weeks or so and they slept for the first time all night at 8 weeks. It was scary that first night, but they were more comfortable sleeping that way. Remember where we slept when we were babies. I know the research says to do back to sleep, however you have to live with baby and if he won't sleep, then do what you need to do. IF he is doing it during the day, then he is used to it and will probably do ok.
Good luck, Trish