4 Month Old Won't Stay Asleep Unless She's on Me.

Try flipping her over on to her belly... yes I know that is against what they tell us to do, but my son has been sleeping on his belly since he was one week old. They used to tell us to not place babies on their backs because if they spit up it would go back in their throats...
Personally, I believe SIDS is a result of vaccines which to me is the root of all evil. But that's a different Oprah!
My son won't sleep on his back unless he's being held because his arms will wake him up too... give the belly a shot, plus it helps them develop their core muscles. My son is only 12 weeks old and is almost ready to sit up by himself and has been showing motions to crawl. I found this out from a lady who is a nurse and works with new moms. I thought she was nuts and for the first few nights i would get up to check on him every few hours. Now I don't worry about him at all. Just don't put blankets on hew or a bib or anything at all that she might tangle herself in. Good luck!

A swaddling suggestion...my son fought the swaddling until we left one arm outside the swaddle. This allowed him the freedom to move an arm around, but still kept him wrapped up and prevented him from startling himself. We did this for about 3-4 weeks and then when he was 4 months old he was ready to transition to a sleep sack (this was also about the time he started rolling over onto his tummy). I used the Swaddle Me blanket, which is very easy to use and enables you to still change a diaper without unwrapping your little one. It's also very easy to wrap your tiny bundle with one arm outside. They make them in two sizes; one for up to 14lbs. and another for over 14lbs. You can get them at Babies R'Us or online.

Oh believe me, I went through this and then some. Is she your first, too? I recommend going to your local library and checking out some sleep books. Once you've found one you like, whose methods you think you can stick to and be consistent with, buy it so you can refer back to it. I know, I know... when do you have time for things like reading, right? It will be worth it, I promise! I used Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child, but only because it was suggested to me. I never even looked at other books, and now I wish I had. Don't get me wrong, it's a good book, but I wonder sometimes if there was a better method out there that would have worked for my son.

Also, I am in no way am advocating this, but I found that my son WOULD not sleep unless he was placed on his tummy. Once he was able to lift his head, I started placing him on his tummy, but only during naps when I could watch him or if I lay him next to me at night. Once he was able to roll over, I didn't worry AS much, but I was still freaked out about it for a long time. He's obviously fine, but it was a risk that I took, and I only took it because nothing else worked!

Both of my boys were like that. I do think it is because we "train" them to need us for sleep. I embraced it early on, loving every moment and feeling the breastfeeding and co-sleeping was all part of my "organic" mommy experience. Of course, at some point, you go a little crazy and want your own space. Don't feel guilty about that. I read every book and found that Elizabeth Pantly's "The No Cry Sleep Solution" http://www.pantley.com/elizabeth/ had the best and middle of the road approach to getting the baby to sleep alone. One bridge that I also found helpful was the Arms Reach CoSleeper. The baby can be near you but still safely sleep in its own bed. You might find a second hand one on Craig's list. Don't feel like a bad mom, just trust your inner voice, you know what's best for your baby.

I SO feel for you! My son was exactly the same way. And although we did breastfeed, so cosleeping was an option for us, after a while I got sciatic problems and couldn't sleep in the side nursing position anymore. So, he had to use his crib.

What seemed to be the ONLY way I could get him in his crib is to swaddle him and then wrap him up in one of my used T-shirts. Strange I know, but I really think he could smell me on the shirt and he slept much better after that. TheHappiestBaby.com has some great swaddling techniques btw. And my son did cry when I swaddled him, but only until I started nursing and then he was fine. Fell right asleep. Of course I think the shooshing (happiest baby technique), boppy and rocking chair helped a lot too. Good luck!!!