3Yo Being Mean to Daddy

It is almost always mommy and me time with the two of you, but now it needs to also be daddy and me time with her.

She needs to bond with daddy a lot more now. The only way they can really do this is by going out together just the
two of them. You will need to trust him and her to work it out together. Try to stay back and let him bond with her like she is with you.

If they were really bonded like you and her are she would never say those things to daddy.

I wish you the best of luck with this.

This is just a phase and it will pass..... not soon enough for everyone else involved, but eventually :) It is very common for girls especially the oldest to go through a period where they seem to be afraid, won't let daddy do anything for them, get upset when Daddy even looks at her. These are extremes. The sooner you just let her know 'the way it's gonna be' the sooner she'll get over it. It's also important to make sure that you and your husband show a unified front when dealing with her. Never interrupt your husband when he is disciplining her or correct him on how to do this or that with her. She needs to know that Daddy is every bit the 'rule enforcer/maker' as mommy.

In the end it will pass. I hope soon :)
Best of luck,
Jen M.

Dear K.,
My 5 yr. old niece, who,m we are raising, has recently started doing that also! But to my husband and her uncle Tony as well. Each time she does it, she has to do a time out and then one of us, will go explain to her how it hurts their feelings and if she'd like it if some one did that back to her! It has taken us a while, but she is finally coming around! You must stay consistent with her! You are teaching her right from wrong! I am glad to see parents who take that responsibility to heart! Cudo's, to you, you are shaping her future!!! May God bless you all!!
Kathy N.

It's normal, it will come and go, just make sure you are spending time with her too :)

Maybe this is crazy, but they should go out alone together to places like the play area at the mall, mcdonalds, beach, park or whatever. This will help them bond, and takes you and the baby dynamics out of the picture. Call it her special time with daddy.

Who is the toddler, you, your husband or your daughter? It's a bit overwhelming to stay ahead of them; but be creative in your parenting.
Dad's sitting on the floor playing? Why not start the game before your daughter interracts with him. Hmm,hmm, I'm having so much fun...She'll be so intrigued that she'll forget whatever frustration (yes, you nusring a new sibling meaning SHE doesn't get to sit in your lap...)
that she'll wind up asking to play with Daddy and then realize that it's a fun thing to do.
The bottom line is: don't suggest activities or even what to eat, but start the game, activity, make a snack, and let her be welcomed to join in...
Once she gets into the new situation in your house, she may become curious and be quite the little helper.
Make folding diapers or baby's laundry a game that she has to find curious and ask you if she can help.

Sound like your husband allows it, or you don't support or allow him to take charge of things "his" way. She might be manipulating the situation because "mommy will always save her". My son will try that with me at times and the urge is there to "comfort him" away from what HE thinks daddy is doing "bad" to him, and will support daddy whether I like his way of doing it or not, and tell my son to "Listen to what your father says"..that way the child doesn't get the impression that it is "mommy and child" against daddy versus the other way around. Also, if she hears YOU arguing with daddy over things like maybe him not doing housework, she may pick up on that and think that daddy is the "bad guy" out of disrespect, so it's up to you mommy to put things back in perspective and instead of telling her softly not to do that to daddy, INSIST and REINFORCE that daddy IS your father and should be respected. It shouldn't be put as a choice for her, but rather something she should do.

My son was 3 when my daughter was born. He was used to having our attention all the time. He was really good with his baby sister but wanted me more than his dad. It ended up being a battle because I couldn't always be there when he wanted me. My husband was really trying to help. So, I had a talk with my son. I told him that I needed his help. I needed him to let Daddy do some stuff because it was helping me out. It seemed to work. They also tried to pick something that only the two of them do together - it seemed to help. Best of luck. I didn't read all your responses but I'm sure people told you it's a phase and to hang in there. When the baby gets a little older, hopefully he'll want to be around his sister and she will think it is neat that he loves her so much. That's what ended up happening for us. Also, time helped because my son was able to see he wasn't being replaced and that I did still have time for him.
I also work full time and some days can be a REAL challenge. I try to just keep a sense of humor about stuff because it's either laugh or cry and some days I don't feel I even have energy left to cry :>) It'll get easier!

Children's behavior is learned from us. Has she seen you being mean/distant/or avoiding Daddy lately? No offense intended, just maybe something to look at.