3 Year Old Won't Let Go of the Binky

Updated on January 16, 2008
J.G. asks from Elmhurst, IL
7 answers

Hi all,

My son is 3 years old and very independent in fact he was potty trained by the time he was 2 1/2! However, when it comes to his pacifier he will NOT give it up. He only uses the pacifier when he sleeps and it is only at home. At school, he takes naps just fine without it. We have tried bribbing him with rewards, using the Binky Fairy, and now I have started cutting off the ends of the nipple so he can hardly put it in his mouth. We tried taking it away cold turkey and he cried for over 2 hours and nearly threw up because he was so upset. He refused to take an afternoon nap in his bed and just sat in it talking for the time he was supposed to be sleeping.

HELP!

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

So What Happened?

Thank you to all who responded. We cut the end of the binky down even furthur and then tried to soothe him to sleep by rubbing his back and telling him a story. He did cry for awhile but then saw we werent going to give in. The following morning the binky fairy left him an action figure he had been asking for along with a note saying how proud she was. He was very excited and proud of himself... telling everyone he could that he did not need the stinky binky. Last night he only cried for about 20 minutes and then went to sleep. Hopefully tonight will be even easier.

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.P.

answers from Chicago on

J.,
I feel your pain! My daughter was totally addicted to NuNu (she didn't just use it to fall asleep, she would suck on it all night!), I was so stressed out (it seemed like all of the time) because her teeth were getting bad and I was contantly worrying about the day I would have to take it away. We tried bribes and rewards nothing worked!!!

I had been telling her about NuNu Fairy since she was 2.5, I finally said, to myself, enough is enough, when she was a little over 3 years old. I went to the store and bought some princess PJs/slippers and a doll and one day when she was at preschool, I threw all the NuNus away, so there was no return. I opened her bedroom window and when we pulled up to the house from school, I showed her the window and we went running upstairs to see what happend.

It was tough for the first two nights getting her to sleep. But, I stayed firm, I told her NuNu Fairy needed the NuNu's and reminded her of the great gifts and I simply walked out of her room and let her cry.

I think in our case two things needed to happen for success.
1) My daughter needed the visual to see that NuNu's had left the building and were never going to return.
2) Most importantly, I needed to tell myself that there was no return/caving in by physically throwing them away (no back ups!) And I just told myself that no matter how bad the crying got it was for both of our well being.

P.S. When I woke up the next morning, I felt like a great weight had been lifted off of my shoulders!

Mom of a 3.5 year old and a 1 year old

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.K.

answers from Chicago on

wow, i am in the EXACT same situation. my son is turning 3 in one month, also already potty trained, only uses paci at bedtime. but without it, he's a disaster. we tried taking it away at 2 and he cried the whole night...for a month, he would get maybe 4 hours of sleep a night before we gave it back. we've been telling him that when he turns three he's all done with it and he's not responding well. sorry, its not much advice, just thought you should know there's someone else out there. anyways, i'm told the best way to do it is cold turkey and suffer.
good luck! let me know if anything works for you.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.T.

answers from Chicago on

Hi J.,
I did it with a story. So I told my son that a baby(which we know) would be happy about a binky because the baby doesn't have one and it would be so happy to get it from you (my son). It worked perfect.
My son is 3 1/2 and he gave up his binky nearly 2 years ago.
Nesmin

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.M.

answers from Chicago on

I think that you should just let him have it. If he only has it at home and feels comfort with it, then let him have it.
I don't think that it's a big deal. If you're worried about what other people will think or if they'll say something to you, then tell them to mind their own business or ignore them.
My daughter is 9 and autistic, so she has a lot of habits that makes her act younger than what she is. I'm sure people look at me all the time, but I don't care. I don't pay attention to anyone anymore, nor do I even look around to see if anyone is looking.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

T.P.

answers from Chicago on

Hi J.,
A friend of mine had the exact same problem. She ended up having to do it cold turkey - -she waited until a holiday weekend so she could have 3 full days without having to deal with anything else. I am the mother of a 4mo and we are currently going through sleep and nap training so I know how awful it can be to listen to the screaming for hours at a time. But, from what I understand, after a few days the cycle is broken and the crying stops. Best of luck to you!
T.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.B.

answers from Chicago on

I stopped the binky cold turkey. Did she cry for sure and it took a little while, but she got over it and your son will to. Just think crying vs him messing up his teeth and you having to hear about it from your dentist.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.D.

answers from Chicago on

I have had two pacifier users. My first was 3 when we decided to have the Pacy Fairy come. For about two weeks leading up to the event, we read the story to her. When the day finally came, we left the pacies in a bag on the window sill out of her reach. You would have thought I was torturing her....she cried for nearly two hours straight. But we stuck to our guns and she finally went to sleep that night. When she awoke, she got a BIG toy (not just a little trinket). She was still sad and mentioned it all the next day but was fine going to sleep for nap and bedtime. My advice is to give it a break for a month and then try again but you HAVE to just stick with it no matter how hard they cry. They will get over it.
My second pacy user was quite the opposite. At less than 2, she started biting off the tips of the pacies. Considering this was a very dangerous choking hazard, I was worried. So, I only gave her one pacy at a time and I would throw away the ones she damaged. Within a week, we were down to the last one and I told her if she bites this one, too, that's it! Sure enough the next morning, it was broken and that was the end of it. She didn't cry or anything.
Now, I have a thumbsucker who is 3 and 1/2 and still sucking at night. Guess I need to find a stop for that :)
Good luck to you. You will most likely encounter LOTS of tears but stick with it and you will be pacy free.

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions

Related Searches