3 Year Old Potty Training Accidents - PLEASE HELP

Updated on November 10, 2013
I.E. asks from Deptford, NJ
5 answers

My 3 year old daughter has been potty trained for a couple of months now, she has the occasional pee accident when we get sidetracked and forget to go, my great concern is the "poopy" accidents that suddenly started about two weeks ago, it now happens on a daily basis. She has not been sick, no major changes in our lifestyle/house/family/her school, no infections/illness. We will take her to potty and she will literally have a "poppy" accident 5 minutes later, when I talk to her about it she says "I must poopy on the toilet" but yet she doesn't. When I ask her if she wants to go she will say no and then minutes later have the accident, of course now we just take her every 40 minutes or so but still often the accident shortly after. She doesn't seem grossed out about it, in fact quite matter of fact, she often wont even tell me that it happened until I realized that she had the accident. I need advise please!!!

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L.A.

answers from Austin on

There are a few things going on here. Remember she is only 3.

She may have seemed trained, but in reality, she was being given clues from someone when she needed to go.. or at least needed to try,

The other thing is, this can be normal.

Children learn a trick, get a lot of praise and then, they are over it.

She just needs to be guided and reminded further. Yes, it is a hassle and frustrating for you, but she is still very young and is not totally in tune with her body.

She is probably about to go through a major growth spurt and is just not interested in stopping to go potty.She does not want to miss out on her fun.. going to the potty takes time away from everything else and it is boring and messy.

This is not a defiance thing, it is being 3 years old and very busy in her own little world.

Hang in there and when she does go on her own, praise her, praise her.

Do not make her feel bad about these accidents, just reassure her you know she can do this. And thet it is quicker to go in the potty than to have to stop and get cleaned up when she has an accident.

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S.W.

answers from Minneapolis on

I would see if you can keep her on the potty longer. Bring a book and keep her company while she sits. If there's a time of day she is more likely to poop, especially do this then.

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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

I would continue to take her to the potty when you think she might need to go. I would also look for things that might encourage her to sit as long as she needs to - a footstool to rest her feet on, a book she can keep by the toilet, etc. Did anything else change in the last 2 weeks? New routine?

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V.B.

answers from Jacksonville on

And who does all of the cleaning up after the accidents?

It sounds as if there is no "reward" for her to make the effort. In the very beginning, treats or prizes or stickers or whatever can work as a small reward. But as they become more capable, then being clean is its OWN reward. But it may not be enough. Maybe her reward can be that she doesn't have to clean up poopy panties.

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M.!.

answers from Phoenix on

Did something happen while she was pooping on the toilet?
Does she seem to fidget when sitting on the toilet for a longer period of time? If so, maybe her legs are falling asleep or she wants to hurry back to a toy, game or TV show.
Other than telling you she knows she needs to poop on the toilet, what else does she say when you ask her why she is going in her pants instead of the toilet?
Have you tried offering incentives like "Potty Treats" or a special outing if she uses the toilet for several weeks without an accident?

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