3 Year Old Developing an Attitude

Whoever coined the phrase "terrible twos" hadn't had a three-year old yet....

Don't worry, just stay consistent and he'll outgrow it. He's just testing the waters of independence. My 11 year old stepson was a NIGHTMARE at three... now he's an absolute joy to be around. My four year old went through the same thing, and now he's just so much fun.

Remember, you want a child that tests and challenges you. These are behaviors that will hopefully continue when he's older and a friend asks him to try drugs, or do something else as bad. You'll want him to say "NO" and run off then too.

Hang in there. It will get better!

Is there anything dear to him that you can take away if he is really out of control? Putting him in the time out or naughty spot when he hits is important. Consistency is the key. I have 2 boys and am going through the same thing. YOu may not see results right away, but it will eventually help. Also give him praise when you see him doing things you like. focus on the positive and that will help too!

I went thru this phase with my daughter when she turned 3 and now that my son is three we are going thru the exact same stuff. My doctor at his 3 year check up even said that it is not the terrible two's that will drive you crazy it is the troublesome threes. Right around 3 1/2 it calmed down again and the emotions and outbursts got better. I just know that the next six months are going to make me pull my hair out. Just be consistent and this too shall pass. It is NORMAL for them to act up at this age.

My son just turned 3 in April, and is doing the exact same thing, but I think even worse than you described. He was always a great kid, and great listener. I didn't understand why everyone complained about terrible two's... because he never really went through it. Now he is... and I have heard that if they go through it at 2 they will be great at 3, but if they don't at 2, they will at 3 and it is even worse because they are more independant. Nothing seems to work with my son. Part of it was that he switched daycares right before he turned 3- and they put him in their "potty trained" room, which is all kids a year older. He is always telling kids (and me) that they can't play with him, and that he won't be their friend, and really bossy. I saw a lot of that happen to him at his daycare, an the kids would attack him at birthday parties (supposedly at school he was the only one who did that, but when we were at birthday parties other kids would randomly push him down, and after he settled down and went to play somewhere else, another kid did the same thing... but his teacher insisted noone ever did anything to him at school and it was all him....). He got so bad... and nothing works. I am out of work on disablity right now (just had surgery), and in 2 weeks of being out of there, he has improved a lot. In my case, the daycare contributed a lot, but I know a lot of it is also just him being 3. It has gotten so bad, that he is moving back to his old daycare in burnsville, which is 30 minutes out of my way to work, because it is worth it. But anyway- I have heard of a lot of people having the same problems with 3 year olds... so I wouldn't worry too much. It's just a phase you have to get through. Just stay firm and loving at the same time, and eventually it will be over. (though right now it probably seems like it will never get better). Good luck!

My daughter turned 3 in April and by the end of May she was a different kid. Screaming and talking back, throwing fits, being as defiant as she can be and frustrating the heck out of us! It is really hard to do but just think about how great it is that your child is becoming independent. It is actually very healthy. He is testing the boundries and becoming his own person rather then Mommy's little baby. It is confusing for him as well since he wants his independence but is scared as heck to be in charge. Give him space and let him know when you are not happy with his actions, try not to yell too much ;) and let him grow into the healthy, intelligent, creative, independent child you want him to be. Just think of the alternative.

Good luck to everyone -

wow...sounds like my house. We have a 3 1/2 y/o and 1 1/2 y/o and SAME behavior. Makes me feel better...a stage I hope!

I second the terrible twos actually taking place when the child is three...my niece did it and now my son does it...he turned three in June.

THE SAME THINGS ARE HAPPENING...one minute just sweet as can be then all of the sudden he throws something or hits someone or runs away screaming no, I don't want to, you stop that.... (SO FUN!!!)

I thought it was because daddy works more in the summer so he doesn't get enough daddy time...but it didn't matter either way. I think really it didn't have anything to do with daddy working more, just to do with me being with both kids by myself more putting more pressure on me, so I searched for a 'reason' for his phase....because well how could my sweet little boy just whap his baby brother in the head like that and run away....

When daddy is around...then things that usually go smooth as butter for me, are difficult to do, such as bed time. When his dad is home I have so much trouble even getting him to go into his bedroom...then he doesn't want to pray, then he needs something. Then the daddy will sugar coat the I NEEDS, and get them for him...

We do the one warning then he has to 'stand in the corner' (oh my does he not like to stand in the corner). With time outs he doesn't really mind, odd but he doesn't, then with last resort he has to go to his room WITH the door shut...that is if he just will not stop misbehaving at all. Usually the corner works, then again in about an hour he will get threatened with the corner again...but their thought process doesn't last forever and a lot of times we will have to repeat ourselves, but stay consistant (I have heard that is the KEY!!!)

I am pretty sure your experiencing a phase just like we are...don't worry they are only three for a year :)

My daughter went through those stages, at 3 and 7. There is nothing you can do except reinforce your rules. If he refuses to wipe his hands don't let him play. Explain to him he needs to follow the rules or can't do things he wants to do. Saying "our rule is you have to wipe your hands before you can go play, so you don't get your toys all yucky" or something along those lines should help. That worked for my daughter, once she learned what mommy says goes, things were much MUCH easier. You need to show him who's the parent and who's the child. Your son has discovered his own voice, it's up to you as parents to show him how to use it, and how to verbalize what he doesn't like about what his sister does instead of hitting her. I always told Caitlyn to "use her words" when she was upset, since I could never tell the issue when she was kicking and screaming. I would just let her throw her fit (in her room with her door closed) and when she was ready to talk about it she could come out. She is 9 1/2 and that still works!