3 Month Old Sleeping Swaddled Only

Updated on March 27, 2010
D.T. asks from Tampa, FL
24 answers

Hi,
I have a 3 month old that sleeps only when swaddled. If I put him down for a nap immediately after he dosed off in my arms, he either instantly wakes up or is up within 3 minutes. And at night, he sleeps well, but only because he's swaddled. The other night he didn't sleep as well, so when he woke up at 4:30am, I tried not to reswaddle and maybe just tuck the blanket as much as possible. Well, his arms were just a flailing every which way and waking him up. He is sooooooooooo restless and just can't seem to sleep unswaddled because he's constant movements are forever waking him up. So, I just told myself that I just swaddle him, no big deal. Well, today, the pediatrician on the The Doctors tv show, said that at 3 months you should stop swaddling because it's good for the baby's development. In addition, I also really want to have the baby learn how to fall asleep independently. Any suggestions on how to wean or rid the baby from swaddling? Keep in mind that I have a 2 year old that I don't want to wake up at night or on weekends during his nap. Thanks.

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P.G.

answers from Dallas on

I have no idea what the doc was talking about because logically, what does swaddling have to do with development? The baby is asleep. Swaddling simulates the comfort of the womb, so I would think it helps development. Babies have a startle reflex that wakes them up, so being swaddled keeps them from scaring themselves. Also, when the baby is strong enough, they get themselves out of the swaddle. When he doesn't need/want it anymore, he'll be able to get out of it. Just keep swaddling, you'll be fine. There are some things that are opinion vs. scientific fact, and I think the swaddling thing is one of them.

2 moms found this helpful
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K.S.

answers from Columbus on

I must be missing something. Why stop doing something that helps him sleep just because he hit a certain age? I'm not trying to be rude, I just don't understand. My son is 7 & he still wraps himself up. If the baby is sleeping well, why not continue?

1 mom found this helpful
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D.S.

answers from Tulsa on

try replacing the swaddle with a lovey blankie. mine flails till he finds his blankie and if he can't find it I just find it for him and hes happy. I have no idea if it will work or not.

1 mom found this helpful

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B.B.

answers from Missoula on

My advice is if your baby likes to sleep swaddled, don't worry about what you saw on The Doctors. I swaddled my son until he was 7 or eight months, and he let me know when he was ready to sleep without the swaddling. As they say, if it ain't broke, don't fix it.

3 moms found this helpful
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D.W.

answers from Gainesville on

Yep, I agree with Bridget B! I swaddled my first till he was over 6 months old and he let me know when it was time to stop. My second was probably 4 months old. All babies are different and 3 months is not a some magic number. You need to follow your baby's lead on this. He's telling you what he needs right now and you are wise to listen to him. Some babies require the comfort and security of being swaddled for longer than others and some never require it or even like it for that matter.

1 mom found this helpful
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H.H.

answers from Hartford on

I have never heard that you should stop swaddling after 3 mo., but that does not mean I am right. I know that most professionals will say that around 3 mo. is a good time to start sleep training as they will soon be set in certain ways, I would ask your personal pediatrician....give them a call. It might be good to read The No Cry Sleep Solution or The Sleep Lady as I found them helpful. I think, but I dont know sorry, that it is okay to swaddle bc some babies are more mobile and need it to soothe them selves. sorry I cant be sure, but good luck i know how rough it is trying to figure out sleep!

1 mom found this helpful

M.P.

answers from Provo on

You can swaddle them for however long you want. The only reason I am weaning my 5 month son off his is because he can get out of all of the ones i have. If you are worried about his develpment, I'd suggest a Woombie. Its a streatchy sack that is amazing. It was the only way my son would sleep, but for some odd reason he hates it now.
http://thewoombie.com/
For weaning just swaddle one arm and let the other one out. I'd suggest to start this at nap time. I worked super hard with Ollie to get him used to one arm, by bed time he was mostly used to the one arm. Do that side for two weeks to make sure he is really used to it, then switch arms. Do that side for two weeks and then try both arms but keep his body swaddled. Some babies like the tight comfort, but your son might not. I am one week in on the weaning and so far its going good! The first day is the hardest with him still flailing. If you can get your mom to watch your 2 year old for that day so you wont have to worry about his naps.

1 mom found this helpful

A.G.

answers from Dallas on

I swaddled my oldest son until he was six months old. It was difficult because I only had one blanket that was the right size for swaddling him then, and he kept getting his arms out and waking himself up. He probably would have done well in a sleep sack, but they didn't have those then. I agree with the others; follow your son's lead. If he wants to be swaddled, swaddle him.

1 mom found this helpful
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K.L.

answers from Washington DC on

You can and should swaddle for as L. as he needs it and allows it! I have a friend whose son was swaddled until he was 9 months old. He was sitting, rolling and crawling like 'normal' when he was awake, so it definitely didn't hurt his development - in fact, he walked at 11 months!

As for teaching him to sleep on his own, I recommend Tracy Hogg "The Baby Whisperer". I have used her techinique on several babies and have always had success.

1 mom found this helpful
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C.C.

answers from Tampa on

We swaddled our son and put him to sleep in his car seat until at least four months and only stopped because he was no longer comfortable and began fighting the swaddle (not just randomly moving in his sleep, the kid was pissed).

1 mom found this helpful
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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

Try a sleep sack...

He still obviously has his "startle reflex"... thus, they flail their appendages and this wakes them. Its involuntary movements.... so well until they grow out of that... they will flail and wake.

All the best,
Susan

1 mom found this helpful
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N.S.

answers from Philadelphia on

when you are tired the doctors on tv sound so convincing. you might be able to think of a few ways that swaddling and development are related. but remember SLEEP is very important for development too. if you aren't sure swaddle with one arm out. i had to return to swaddling twice and each time i realized how much my son really needed it. there are plenty of drs.. who will rebuff that tv dr. i think your mommy instincts are right.

1 mom found this helpful
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T.M.

answers from Orlando on

I've had friends who use some form of swaddling up to age 18 months. So adjust to your child's needs and while you probably won't want to swaddle as snugly as you did when she was newborn, you can continue to swaddle.

And for the love of God...PLEASE don't get your child raising advice from the Doctors TV show. Dr.Lisa is especially ignorant and obnoxious. ugh.

If swaddling is working, I can't imagine changing just for the purpose of changing. Even as an adult, many of us love to wrap up with a blanket on the couch...there is nothing wrong with your baby wanting to be snugly wrapped as well.

1 mom found this helpful
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M.F.

answers from Boca Raton on

What the Dr's are referring to is that the tight swaddle can restrict circualtion and the second thing is that your baby will start to turn over soon and the swaddle blanket can then become a danger to them. with that said babies need some type of soothing to get them to sleep. usually its movement (rocking), sound (humming), and/or snuggling (swaddle). some babies will take more to one or the other.

we weaned ours off swaddling at about 4 months and first started with one arm out, then another, then no swaddle at naps, with finally no swaddle at night. Putting them down to sleep on their back rather than your arms will save you both countless sleepless hours. It will take your soothing to get them almost asleep and then to give them tools to help them finish the job on their own. For us Dr. Karps "healthy sleep habits happy child" was perhaps the best advice we could find. it focused on teaching your baby to put themselves to sleep and it packed with good tips.

There are tons of tips if you google on the internet too and you will have to try a bunch before you find out what your child likes. Ours really took to the Fisher Price Aquatic Soother toy that we hung on her crib and for two years still woke up and hit it on herself to put herself back to sleep. She also loved to clutch something soft (don't laugh but she loved to hang onto a dried out wipe). Your child will grab onto something to soothe themselves but it won't happen over night. the fun of parenting will be to see what that is and then you have great stories to make them laugh later on at how the clung to a dired out old wet wipe to go to sleep.

Good Luck!

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M.R.

answers from Miami on

I would just like to reiterate what the other moms are saying. If he needs to be swaddled, swaddle him. He will let you know when he doesn't like it anymore.

I swaddled my daughter until she was 6 months and she was very early on all her motor development (rolled over at 5 weeks, sat unassisted at 4 months, crawled at 7 months, walked at 9 1/2 months). As long as you are giving him plenty of tummy time and time to look and roll around while he's awake it should do no harm to swaddle him if he needs it while he sleeps.

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A.F.

answers from St. Cloud on

I swaddled my daughter until 7 months. It sure didn't slow down her development! I would take The Doctors worth a grain of salt.

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S.S.

answers from Miami on

Put your baby to sleep on tummy and this will prevent the moro reflex from kicking in. Swaddling is a bad idea because it restricts the much needed movement a baby needs to integrate primitive reflexes thereby having them never go away. Tummy time, tummy time, tummy time. Babies need movement, movement, movement in order for the brain to develop correctly.

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H.G.

answers from Tampa on

I've known people who have swaddled much longer than three months. Heck...I think I might have even done longer than that. As long as baby is sleeping on the back and is SLEEPING...swaddle away. Some just need that tightness to sleep.

And it isn't always best to follow TV and online advice-doctor's or not.

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K.G.

answers from San Francisco on

We swaddled our twins unitl they were 5 months, they loved it. We used large receiving blankets and my husbands extra tight swaddling. Then we put them into the vibrating chairs we had baby papasans and we put those in their cribs. For some reason being in the chairs helped keep them swaddled.

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S.B.

answers from Kansas City on

we swaddled until 9 months. I say, if it's not broke, dont fix it. If he sleeps great swaddled, why put yourself and him through heck taking it away? He'll eventually outgrow it and it will be fine.

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K.J.

answers from Orlando on

I would continue to swaddle, it's what is soothing to him and it's very natural for them to be swaddled at that age, 3 months is still very young. My daughter is 2 now, so it's hard to remember exactly, but, she was a thumb sucker at 8wks, so I remember swaddling and leaving one arm out so she could have her thumb(lol) and then it progressed to both arms out. I could tell she wanted a little freedom, but I kept swaddling from the underarms down, I think until 5 months. it was also cool at night, and I liked the idea of always having her warm. Then she started rolling and became a belly sleeper and no longer wanted the swaddle. Just go with flow, and follow his cues. One day soon he will show you he doesn't need it anymore. All babies are different, and so are Peds. Just don't swaddle too tight, just enough for him to feel snug and not get loose. Dr Karp, who also wrote "Happiest Baby on The Block" is a big believer in swaddling, and goes over the history of it. The book is a must read! there is a DVD too which makes it easy, you can check out of the library if you dont want to buy it. Good luck, and hope your little guys sleeps well!

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T.B.

answers from Miami on

Wow, how interesting to find that I'm not the only mom whose baby only would sleep well if swaddled. My precious daughter is now 7 1/2 years old but when she was an infant, she would ONLY sleep if swaddled, and quite tightly I must add. If she was loosely swaddled, she wasn't happy. She was quite literally, snug as a bug. She eventually outgrew this "phase" as I could lay her down but simply tucking the blanket under her body but for the longest time it was only the swaddle that would do. My daughter is perfectly fine. She developed just fine so I say, swaddle him until he doesn't like it anymore.

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J.A.

answers from Jacksonville on

He will outgrow it when he is ready. In some cultures babies are swaddled until a year old, and they turn out just fine.

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D.H.

answers from Miami on

You should do whatever you feel comfortable with, but I swaddled my daughter until she was more than 5 months old. She will be two this weekend and she is perfectly developed, super smart and loving. Every baby is different and you should figure out what works for you. Don't listen to the tv or even the doctors if it goes against what you know in your heart.
Good luck!

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