3-Year Old Girl Having Trouble with Speech Issues.

As a mother of 4 and a Special Ed. teacher, I would advise you to: accept your daughter's speech, no matter what form it takes. The important thing here is to make your daughter feel that she is loved and is communicating her needs. She is probably feeling a little left out and insecure with a new baby and you gone to work. Talk to the daycare folks and tell them to EASE UP on her and let her be. Find some way to have special time alone with your oldest, precious daughter just for fun (her style, maybe shopping, playground silliness, and ice cream cones, keep her in mind when doing cooking or chores - yes, she can fold clothes (any which way is good, stacking tupperware or pot and pans will really help you.) When I was involved with a project, I'd try to get them (my little ones), to 'help' sweeping, picking up, playing 'bus' in my lower cabinets" let her know SHE IS ONE SUPER GIRL cuz she is.

I hope that husband of yours appreciates all you do. If he does, he'll be there to get you and your daughter together ALONE and away from pressure.

You are doing the right thing by having her speech tested, and I agree with the other poster who suggested having her hearing tested, too. Both are simple, non-invasive tests that can give you alot of information about how to help your daughter. I would be more concerned with the unsupportive daycare workers who seem to think that helping your daughter is too much trouble!! If it turns out to be a speech problem, the speech therapist should be able to give you information to share with the daycare workers about ways they can help your daughter, and she may even be willing to do an inservice with them to educate them on what your daughter needs. Actually, if your daughter qualifies for services of any kind, the provider will be able to help you alot with this. He/she will also be able to help you with strategies that you can use at home to help your daughter communicate her needs and reduce her (and your!) frustration. It may not be a quick fix, however, so have patience and know that you are doing the absolute best thing for your daughter by investigating and not ignoring the problem. Whatever you find out on April 1, you will be on your way to finding the best way to help your daughter. Good luck!

My four year old boy has speech problems too. He was diagnosed at about 2 1/2 with apraxia. We started noticing his lack of speech at about 18 months and got him into a speech therapist for an evaluation. He started speech therapy sessions weekly. He now goes to preschool through our school district and receives speech therapy in the classroom both as a group and individually. He still pronounces some words wrong or leaves off the beginning or ending sound and he is still really hard to understand but he has improved alot. I don't know where you live but check with your school district. Ours has a program called Parents as Teachers. They will come to your house and do a 3+ screening on your daughter and they will let you know if she needs speech therapy or give you some guidance as to what you could do. My little boy still gets really frustrated if we can't understand him and he gets really mad at his little brother who is 2 1/2 when he doesn't understand him. I can relate to what you are going through. You can email me if you have any other questions. Good Luck!

My neice-in-law has had the same problem with her son and they took him to the doctor and found that he was having inner ear problems. might want to have an ENT check the ears and see if their is something wrong inside the ear

Did you know that you can take her to a public school and they have speech available for children ages 2 1/2 to 5? It's all free and you'd be working with a speech teacher. It's an awesome program! I just recommended my daughter take her 3 year old. He'll repeat everything we say, but he won't speak on his own. If you ask him a question, he will repeat the question, he won't answer the question. The speech specialist will be able to tell you if it's actually a speech problem or if she needs to go elsewhere. I know my kids always got frustrated when they knew exactly what they were saying, but I didn't understand them. Stay positive! Maybe a different daycare isn't a bad idea! :)

Have you had her hearing tested by a specialist? My sister is a Speech Language Path. and her 5 yr old was having problems. She thought it was a speech problem but turned out she needed hearing aids. She does great now. She has a hard time hearing certain pitches of sound.

my oldest has been in speech therapy since he was in preschool. he is 7 now he started at about 4. he is almost done with it. he loves going to speech therapy. he has so much fun. i really hope taht all she needs is some therapy. and as for the daycare well u should really think about finding another place. they should be trying to help u that is what my daycare did. good luck i will keep u in my thoughts.

Hi K.,
I don't know if you will find this of any help or not. But my cousin had the same situation with her son. When they began to see that he was having trouble communicating, they started consulting with a lot of people and professionals. To try to figure out what to do. The best advice that she received was using signing. It was just your basics like for being hungry, tired, needing the potty, Mom/Dad, Thank You, etc. Very simple signing techniques. I will admit that it helped them out a lot. He was a lot less frustrated and it just took sometime to work on what sign meant what. But his communication has come along way since then. I just wanted to send on a possible idea to try if you wanted to do so. It was just something that my cousin tried and seemed to work out for her son. Just a little beginning stepping stone...I hope that things come along with your little one and I wish you the best.
~A Friend and Fellow Mom

I would recommend getting with your local Parents as Teachers Organization, or Infant-Toddler and if you don't go there then pick a good speech therapist. I was fortunate enough that through my local PAT and Infant-toddler program my 2 yr old was diagnosed with delayed speech and it wasn't until the speech therapist started working with him that he figured out that he probably had fluid on his ears and that was distorting the sounds he was hearing and making. Once we finally got him into an ENT and got tubes put in things started going more in the right direction. He's 4 and in preschool now but still sees a speech therapist 2x a week and his younger sister (now 3) is seen as well because she says the same things he does.

Another thing that I would help her with is to get a basic book or DVD on sign language. All of our speech therapists use it in conjunction with their speech. Frankly, I would have a discussion with your daycare director as to the alienation and undo distress they are causing your daughter...they too should be helping her find better ways to communicate be it through speech or sign language and frankly, if they aren't willing to pony up, I would recommend finding another facility...if you are in the Atchison area I have one I'd recommend.

Have patience. Talk to her and let her know that you understand she has a speech problem and you and daddy are going to work hard to help her overcome it and ask her to work with you...set some milestones and rewards...check your local library for some sign language DVDs, they are extremely helpful and I think you will find that it will help ease some of the tension. My kids were signing for food, drink, please and thank you by 6 months.

Also, if she has some friends at school I would recommend getting with those parents and letting them know your concerns...if she has some allies I would certainly foster that relationship because these may be lifelong friends for her if they are standing by her now when she has these problems. At least she will know that she still has friends that care and want to be around her, even when things are a little tough.

Feel free to contact me at anytime. My email is ____@____.com

Hi K.,

I don't know if I am wrong H., but there is always something about 'speeching problems" or "adhd", "ODD" or any other problem when it comes to our kids. My kid started speaking very late, he never had the "x number of words at specific age" or something like that; however, now at 7 years old, he has a very extensive vocabulary, and he does not have problems at all with communication. I believe that in now days adults, some teachers or some doctors (I am not saying all of them) are always trying to find something wrong with the kids, some psychological problem with them, some problems with the speech etc.. I do believe that every kid is different, and not because one does not fit in the "normal" or "average" standard means that he or she is having a "problem" . To me, each kid learns at different pace because every kid is exposed to different stimulus, different environment, different situations even in the same family. I learned that sometimes we, moms, have to work a little bit harder with one of our kids. Some children take more time in being potty trained while others are ready so early in life; in language, I think occurs the same. My older kid did not talked clearly until 3 and half years old, and my 2 yrs old is speaking and talking at a faster pace than his older brother. So, I wouldn't be so concerned about it. In your case, K., I would work with him harder, play with words, find some dynamic activities, etc...and give him more time and patience. Eventually, he will reach his level ( as seen by others).
I am so tired to see that people who work with children, and have some direct influence in their education do not want to deal with different children, or smart children or children who do not learn at "their standards".
Good Luck and do not despair
Alejandra