2Yr Old Sucking a Pacifer

One thing I have notices with my 7 year old, is that with my son, she wants to be able to do everything that he is doing. I believe that it is all the attention you are showing to the baby. We had a really bad incident with my son about 2 weeks ago. He decided to take a header off the fireplace border. Had to go to the ER. The next afternoon, My daughter runs in the house after falling off her bike saying she needs to go to the hospital just like Lane (her brother) Try getting him involved with helping take care of the baby. That way you are spending time with him too. Also remember that he is in that "Terrible Two" stage.
C.

He is just testing to see if he still holds his place in the family. Don't get frustrated with him. With my kids I always said "oh you would like to try this too?" Then I would say they could, but I put a limit on for how long. You don't want him to get attached to a pacifier because it will change the stucture of his mouth. So maybe let him try it out and tell him it is something for the baby to chew on but he can see what it is like. Then tell him he needs to say goodbye to it, but also ask if he would like to have a toy that he can chew on. Then find some toy that is appropriate. He could be teething and it may feel good as well. My daughter also has an interest in a pacifier she found. We never used them with our kids though I bought a pack of them with my 1st just in case I wanted to try them out for him. We tried it once he was 3 weeks old after establishing breastfeeding and after that one try gave it up. He found a pacifier again when he was 9 months old when we were packing and moving. He told us it was his "chewy" and he used it to cut his 1st tooth. After that I saved it as his 1st and only pacifier. Long story short, my daughter just recently found it and wants to use it. I actually used the same logic on her as far as allowing her to have it but for a limited time and then telling her to tell it goodbye. She laughs with delight that she is allowed to have it and when I tell her it is time to say goodbye to it she hesitates at first, but then I allow her to decide which place on her dresser to "put it to bed". She is then in control of it and joyfully does what she is suppose to. With my boys, my oldest went thru wanting to do what the youngest did (ie watch the mobile while laying in the crib, sitting in the bouncy chair, etc) and I would just tell him "oh you want to try out what the baby is doing?" and make it out as a take turns lesson. Then I would talk about what it was he was doing and talk about the colors or shapes of it and ask if he was all done. I am talking I gave undivided attention to him while it was happening and it truly only lasted a few short minutes. Then I would say "thank you for doing such a great job sharing and taking turns." It was not long before he totally gave up even having an interest in trying things the baby was doing. Both my boys did this exact thing after we had a new baby (my oldest son did it when my middle guy was born and my middle guy did it when my daughter was born...my kids are all 1.5 yrs apart). It may take some energy on your part to just be consistant, patient and continue to let him know that he is still loved. Good luck and God bless!

B. :)

I sounds like he is going through alot and this is giving him some comfort. It is unfortunate that he picked it up so late.

My daughter was hugely attached to her "bink" from birth and I was concerned about when to break her. My ped. said that they really shouldn't have them after 2 yrs because it can start to do damage to the mouth and tooth structure.

If he'ss 22 months maybe you could let him only have it at bedtime for a couple months to help him adjust to the changes, then use one of the other suggestions like throwing a party or mailing it off and getting a gift?? It will be tought though if the baby still has one. I would definately make it a big boy thing!!

Good Luck

Personally, I am opposed to any child having a pacifier beyond the age of 4 months. I had a terrible time getting my first daughter off the pacifier. My second daughter never would tolerate a pacifier even though she was a preemie who was fed through a tube and the nursing staff gave her a pacifier to develop her sucking ability and so she would associate sucking with a full tummy. My youngest daughter didn't take a pacifier often and I took her off it when she was a few months old.
I recommend taking your daughter off the pacifier before she becomes too attached. Then your nephew won't be able to suck it either.

The only thing I could do is take it away during the day and give it to him at night. then took it away at night giving him a sippy cup. But every child is different about these things. You have to be Brave and try not to stress out about the crying

I think he doesnt like the fact that you are tending to your 8 month old. He doesnt feel like the baby anymore so he is doing what he can to get attention. Ok attention is a bad word...doing what he can to feel like a baby again. Try putting something on the end of it that he wouldnt like...dont let him know you are doing it, just do it and then give it to him. Dip it in lemon juice or just anything that you KNOW he doesnt like. If that doesnt work, I have heard to cut the tip off little by little...but I have heard that it doesnt work. But its worth a shot. With Cyrus, we made a mistake in letting him go to bed with a bottle...and when it came time to wing him from the bottle at a year old, he didnt take nap or bed time to well. The only way we could get around it was just let him cry and scream his self to sleep. Then he would wake up in the middle of the night and try to find it and start crying but again we had to be strong and just let him cry it out until he fell asleep. Your pediatrician will prolly tell you the same thing. It will take a couple of weeks at the most but once its done and over with, its worth it!!! I hope I was able to help. And good luck!!!!

A.,

WEll, it actually sounds like at the moment he might be feeling a little left out. He might also be acting out b/c he had all of your attention and now he has to share. There could be all kinds of reasons he is doing this. When he takes your daughter's binky as we call them, tell him that it is your daughter's and that he is a big boy. Please let me know how things turn out please and if you have anymore questions please e-mail me at ____@____.com. Thank You!

It sounds like your nephew is jealous of the new baby and is using the pacifier to get attention. I haven't had to deal with taking a pacifier (or bippers, as we call them) from a toddler, but my sister has had success with a Bye-Bye Bipper party. She had family over and they put all of the pacifiers in a box and mailed them to the babies. Then the toddler got a big kid gift. Nothing extravagant, just a special something. Similarly, a friend of mine had success with the Cork-Fairy (she calls the pacifier a cork). She had her toddler put the pacifier under the pillow at night for the Cork Fairy. The next morning the pacifier was gone and some big-girl books were waiting for her. Something like this might give your nephew the attentnion he is looking for while reminding him that he is a big boy, not a baby. Good luck and I hope this helps a little!

Hi A., I think that I would just give him the pacifier and everybody will be alot happier. It sounds like he needs something extra to make him feel secure and if he really doesn't need it, he will give it up eventually or it will be not a big deal to take it away when he's a little older and able to deal with whatever stress he's having at this time.
Good Luck and try to get some rest when you can, I've got 6 kids and I know how exhausting being a mom can be.
M. B.

I would let him have it for a while. He needs comfort, and wants to be like the new baby. Any child goes through this, and at 2 they sometimes feel the need to have a lovey or something to hold that they believe keeps them close to you. I would then take it away after the new baby fears wear off, and you may not even have to take it away, he may just forget about it.

I would try offering him some kind of reward for not taking the pacifier. Maybe give the pacifier to the "Paci Fairy" and explain that it's ok for your daughter to have one because she's so little, but he's a big boy and doesn't need it anymore. Then when he doesn't ask for it or goes to sleep without it, reward him with a sticker or something, and if he does ask for it than you can take one away.....the more stickers, the bigger the reward.

It might be worth a shot, I know it wouldn't work for everyone!

Best of luck!

Maybe he is jealous of the other lil one and tries to take her things so you'll pay attention to him.

It sounds like he wants the same amount of attention that the baby is getting. Skip the pacifier and set him up with a snack or new video while you feed. Play word games with him "Do you see a television?" Show it to me. Do this for a few weeks then progress to, "Do you see a doll? Where is it?" Then progress to "I see a square, can you find it?" then you can move on to "I spy something that is B."

Be sure to spend at least an hour a day alone with him.

As far as the bedtime routine goes it's better for him to cry it out than give in. The sucking motion of his tongue can slow down his developing vocabulary.

A.:

It sounds like he is going through some changes, and needs extra TLC. However, giving him a pacifier (which is not good for his teeth or ears, at this age) is not the answer. Plus, it will be very difficult to wean him off if it. Try giving him a transistion object like a teddy bear or a lovey. Also,give him a lot of love and attention. You have your hands full!

A. L