21-Mth-old Refusing Bedtime Milk-- Is This Typical?

hi everyone--

so some background: my 21-mth-old daughter is in the 30th percentile for height and 3rd percentile for weight. i'm not concerned about this, as i was always in the 1st percentile for height/weight, my husband shot up 12 inches at age 15 to 6 feet (and is skinny), and 3 out of 4 of my daughter's cousins are skinny and small. my daughter is super-active, super-curious, eats well and is talking up a storm. to sum it up: she's definitely thriving. and she drinks milk throughout the day, but only at most 10-12 oz. so her pediatrician wanted us to continue the bedtime bottle, since she was drinking 6-8 more oz of milk at that time. which was fine with us because i love our bedtime routine, as does my daughter.

in the past week, 6 out of 7 days, she hasn't drunk any of her bedtime milk. she was gnawing on the nipple, so i thought she was teething. but even with tylenol (which she usually likes to chase down with milk), she doesn't drink more than an ounce. i thought maybe we can change over to a cup-- we tried her sippy cup, a regular cup with a spout, and simply a regular cup. no go. she still wants the rest of the bedtime routine (review of the day in her dark room siting on my lap in the glider, brushing and flossing teeth, a bedtime song), and still goes down easily and sleeps through the night. she is having a slightly bigger breakfast.

so after all this info, the question: when do toddlers wean from bedtime milk? is this something i need to push? i hate feeling pressured to pressure my daughter about food. she is a great eater, has a ton of calcium from cheeses and yogurt every day. is this the end of bedtime milk? is this a phase? is this typical? we will be seeing the pediatrician for her 21-mth check-up next week.

thanks for reading this and for any and all insights!

UPDATE: thanks everyone for your kind words and advice. my daughter is very good at letting me know when she is done with things (no longer wanting to be swaddled or bounced to sleep, etc.)-- it's just hard because i finally feel like i know what i am doing and then it changes again! last night, she didn't want the bottle (fine), but wanted to do the bedtime routine with her pacifier. usually she only gets her pacifier once she is in her crib. she gets it only for nap and sleeping. but she seemed much more anxious about the pacifier. i definitely don't want her to become more dependent on the pacifier. we've been thinking about taking away the pacifier by her 2nd birthday. but should i do it sooner if she's becoming more dependent on it? or should i relax and say that this is a transition for her and let her suck on her pacifier while we get ready for bed? our routine used to be bath, bottle in semi-darkness and review of day, brushing teeth. so tonight i think i will switch it to bath, brushing teeth, sitting in dark and review the day. but do i have her suck on a pacifier during the review? or do i not let her and just put her to bed if she starts to cry about not having her pacifier? any advice on what i should do tonight and how to end pacifier use would be great. (i am very nervous about taking away the pacifier-- she sleeps so well and i am not ready to have sleepless nights again even temporarily. i know i am thinking the worst, but i can't help it in this case :).) thanks!!