20 Month Old Still Not Talking

My 20 month old boy is not talking either and since he is my 3rd one with this problem I am not worried because now my other 2 wont stop talking... any way, I have him in the ECI program they come to the house 2-4 times per month and are free in most cases... depending on income and family size.

Hope that helps
A. J

My oldest son didn't really talk much until about that age as well. I have other friends who speak two languages at home and they have mentioned it sometimes takes longer for bilingual children to talk but once they do, they speak both languages perfectly. I would suggest giving him some time and seeing what happens. I don't think you are a worry wart at all. I was concerned about my son as well and since he was healthy and happy without hearing loss or anything else, I just let him have some time to talk and when he did finally talk, he spoke in full sentences!

Read a lot of rhyming books, poems, etc. EG Cup in Pup by Dr. Suess. Give the responsibility of reading to others in the household as well.

Hey R.,

I would contact ECI (Early Childhood Intervention), they do free evaluations. It may identify an issue and offer assistance, or confirm that things are fine and on track.

Peace of mind is priceless...
http://www.dars.state.tx.us/ecis/index.shtml

I have twin 21 month old babies. One talks quite a bit, though not as much as his sisters did at that age. The other talks only a little bit; he basically lets his brother do the talking. I am not worried at this point; all babies are different. I also work full time; I know how guilty that can make you feel, but it's just important that you spend quality time with him while you are home - remember to speak to him a lot and name as many things as you can. If he has started saying bye-bye he is probably about to start saying other things. Other than mama and dada, my boy started with bye-bye; now it's a whole string of bye, see 'ya later, have a good day...seriously. their twins sisters were almost the same - one spoke a lot quickly, the other said very little, but when she started talking (the second one), she spat out a ton of words at the same time. That seemed to be her personality; she would wait until she had the whole thing down before she would start doing it. Think about how your boy approaches other milestones; does he seem to wait until he has it mastered before starting to actually do it? Otherwise I think the idea about contacting ECI is a good idea if he does not improve over the next few months. take a deep breath and stop feeling guilty.

Hi R., I say don't worry so much. My nephew and niece did not talk until they were nearly 3 years old. My sister-in-law got a sign language book and taught them some easy sign language, like mama, daddy, more, etc. It helped her communicate with them and made her feel better. She talked to a speech person (can't think what they are called) and this was what they suggested, they said some children just don't want to talk. My youngest son, has had tubes put in his ears twice now and he turned 3 in January and he is just now starting to talk. If your son doesn't have cronic (sp?) ear infections, then he is just not ready to talk yet. The daycare I take my youngest to and I taught him some sign language and he is fine. Don't worry, I know it is hard not to but when he does start talking, he will talk your ear off! I know my nephew and niece do and they are 14 and 11 now. Good luck and try the sign language it will give you some piece of mind. L.

My niece was the first child of my sister-she did not talk until 4! They had a therapist come in -everything was working-she just did not want to talk!!! She is now a beautiful 34 year old with 3 masters, working on a PhD, has a great job, etc...she said she merely had nothing to say-like Einstein. Twenty months?! Everyone might be talking for him....
My grandson is not a great talker -yet! when he was in moms day out his teacher said that he "talked" with the other classmates.....
One day you will be saying,"when will he be quiet??!!"

My little boy didnt talk at all until about 21 months. He started saying a few words like your boy is. In just a couple of months he was speaking in sentences! Be patient, it sounds like he is starting!

My son (now 2.5 years old) was not talking at 15 months so we had him evaluated by Early Childhood Intervention (ECI). He just finished his year of ECI tutoring and he tested at the communication level of a 3 1/2 year old. I completely concur with what others have said. They were wonderful. The key issue with our son was that we were anticipating all his wants and needs so he didn't have a reason to talk. Simple things such as not giving him his sippy cup until he said "cup" or waiting to pick him up until he said "up" made a big difference. ECI can give you both general information on how to improve his communication as well as information tailored to your son's needs. I highly recommend it, especially the developmental group at the Warren Center in Richardson. They are part of the ECI community.

R., I know it can be scarey sometimes, but I think everyone is right. All kids are different and develop at different rates. I have 2 boys, 8 years old adn 3 years old. I will tell you that I was in the same exact both with both of them. They were perfectly healthy and did everything on time, except talk. They both exploded at 24-25 months. It was like they were just listening all that time and then they just decided now was the time. I mean they might have had like 20-50 words down, but didnt "talk", until right at 2. I would give him a little time, and then talk to your Dr. I think it is important that he didnt start talking then stop, then I would be concerned. I will tell you that I talk to the boys ALL the time, I always have. I point out everything we see and name it, then I have them do the same when they want something. I think sometimes it takes us as parents to communicate with them and it really helps. Good luck, I am sure all will turn out well !

there are many reasons your son may not be talking, but definitely call ECI and have them do an evaluation. It is free or no cost and they will come to your home. I have nothing but praise for ECI.

He is fine! My now 9 yr old did not talk until he was 2 1/2. he might have been closer to 3 yrs!!I knew he was okay b/c his receptive language was fine. He understood everything that people were saying! He was always very smart (and is now in the gifted and talented program.) i am also a speech therapist and i would not worry about it if i were you. give him more time...wait until he's 2 1/2 and by then i'm sure he'll be doing 2-3 word sentences. don't worry. give him more time.
hope that helps!

Dear R. G,

Our grandson was very slow to talk. We finally took him to a speech therapist, and he began to talk very soon after that. It was no time after he spoke his first words that he began to speak in sentences! We learned that we were making things too easy for him. When we began to make "use words" to describe what he wanted, he would do it! Maybe you need to take him to see someone for a little extra help getting started. You may also want to have his hearing checked. His doctor explained that sometimes the problem isn't really with speech, but with hearing instead.

No matter what, don't worry. Some children are just slower to speak.

Deb D

R.,
I was in your place not to long ago. Everyone kept telling me he would talk when he was ready. Well I did not listen to them and called ECI. I didn't think it would hurt to get him a free evaluation. He got great speach therapy. The ladies that come out are great with him and he has responded well. I think you should consider ECI. Just to try to put your mind at rest. My son is talking more and more every day and I think the therapy that ECI has given has been the answer.Good luck.

Someone else posted a similar concern yesterday for her 16 month old, so you may want to check out those responses. Your best bet is to consult with your pediatrician. There may/may not be anything wrong. Kids develop differently, and generally speaking, boys tend to develop a little slower. That being said, I think your pediatrician can tell you if your son should be tested, or to take the wait and see approach. And please don't feel guilty and think it is your fault! Us working moms have a way of doing that to ourselves . . .

R., You said he is trying to talk, perhaps he is having some trouble forming the words. I used to talk to my infants, and talk in a normal voice and speak my words clearly, and say to them , can you say ???? Sometimes they would try , but they do have to be talked to. I also used to show them books with large colorful pictures and say what it was or the color. After all, we are teaching them a language, and word association, with objects, and if we talk like a baby babble, they will learn babble. I usderstand having to work also, don't be so hard on your self, as the babysitter to help you some. If there are a lot of people around and all talking to each other, maybe he can't get a word in edge wise.LOL I read wher the first 5 years of a childs life they learn more than any other 5 yr period of their lifetime. Hope this helps,
B.

When you go to your doc get some information about ECI, which stands for Early Childhood Intervention. They are a non for profit group that will come to your home and do assessments on your child. When I used them it was free and you could get services until the child turns 3yrs. My friend had a son that didn't talk until he was past 3 yrs of age. ECI diagnosed him with Speech Apraxia which is a neurological delay. They worked with him for a year until services were cut off due to his age. Then they referred him to the public school system and Andrew began services there. He was talking with just a few months after he began attending the program through our local elementary school. This program was designed for kids with speech and developmental delays. Your son is very young and he may just have a little delay. That's not uncommon for boys. Contact ECI and they will work with your son. B.!

My four-year-old DD didn't really talk until right after her 2nd birthday. She went from just a few words too complete conversations. However, I believe strongly that mother's should trust their instincts. Get him evaluated. If nothing is wrong, you'll feel better. If something is found, you'll know what you are dealing with.

I'm going through the same thing right now with my 20 month old daughter. She has not said anything, not even mama or dada. About 2 weeks ago she said bubbles!! Her first word. Over the past two weeks she has been picking up on other words, just repeating what people are saying. Her pediatrician had me get in touch with ECI. I would recommend doing the same. This coming Monday will be the evaluation meeting, so I do not have any comments on how great they are, but from all the previous post, I'm sure they will be a big help. I would suggest contacting them soon. By the time they come to evaluate her it will be a little over a month since I first called to get things going. Good Luck!!

We are in the same boat R.. I have a 12 yr. old and a 19 month old. My 19 month old isn't talking yet either, except for Dadda, Momma. He babbles ALOT..lol but nothing we really understand. I was worried at first but everyone, including the dr. says to just give him time. As long as he is understanding what you are saying and can follow directions that you give him, then you know his hearing is just fine. It's frustrating I know but it will happen when they are ready. I joke and say that when he does start talking it's going to be in complete paragraphs! lol Hope this eases your worries just a little.

I also have two boys and my youngest was delayed in his speech as well. I understand your concern as my firstborn did not have this problem. My youngest is now 6.5 years old and talks wonderfully (sometimes non-stop). He has had some years of speech therapy to help him get to this point. I took him to the school district when he was three for a speech evaluation (the earliest age they allowed) and he qualified for speech therapy - the great thing was that I was already paying for this with school taxes so it did not cost me anything extra. I would suggest looking into your local school district as well and see what age he can start - and until he reaches that age the best advice is to read him lots of books. Also, because he is the youngest it is kind of natural for his older brother and others to speak for him. My doctor suggested that when my son wanted something and would point and grunt to take that opportunity to say the name of what it was he was wanting and ask him to repeat it several times, even if he doesn't repeat you he is learning the names for things and seeing that you are encouraging him to speak. Good luck - things will work out - I know that sometimes it is hard to be patient but just remember that God's timing is perfect timing!

I am a speech pathologist, and it is hard to tell if your son has a problem or not. I think it would be a good idea to get him evaluated by a speech pathologist. People telling you to just wait is not really the best idea. If he does have a problem, the sooner he is evaluated the better. Kids have an easier time catching up the earlier they start getting help. I feel like it is better to get him evaluated and him not have a problem than to wait and he is missing out on help that he can get now.

I didn't start talking til I was 3 and my daughter didn't talk much until way after 2. Has your sons hearing been checked? After my daughter had ear tubes put in she talked much more. Her ears were very congested with infection. Does he understand what you ask him to do"? Like ask him to go get a toy in his room and bring it to you. There is a program in Texas, ECI (early childhood intervention), that works with children under 3 and they will come to your house or the child's daycare. After 3 your school district takes over. My daughter has been working with them since 2 for speech therapy. There are offices for each county. they will do an initial testing of comprehension, physical skills, etc. It used to be free but now is on a sliding pay scale.

My son that is now 33 did not start talking until he was about the age of yours. I took him to the doctor because I was concerned but the doctor did not think it was a problem. He said really smart kids talk later because they are observing and thinking instead of talking. Also, they want to be able to talk intelligently when they do start talking. You will be surprised at his vocabulary when he does start talking.

You can't shut him up now!!

First of all, do not feel like it is your fault at all! Just talk as much as you can to your kids when you are around.

My second suggestion would be to talk to your pediatrician about possibly getting an evaluation through early childhood intervention. ECI will be able to determine if he is having trouble or just not talkative.

I had the same problem with my now 4 year old. He didn't even say-Mommy until after his second birthday and it broke my heart! I had him tested for Autism and he didn't have it. He had a sister 12 months older and I didn't understand why he wasn't picking up on her talking. I got him enrolled in speech and had him tested for everthing in the world. The only thing that was wrong with him was -severe speech delay. He has been in speech for 30 minutes twice a week since he was 2. He is finally doing great. He is not on a 4 year old level yet but he is getttin there.

I wouldn't be too concerned. My second - also a boy - didn't really speak clearly until he was about two and a half. He seemed slow because my firstborn son seems to be verbally gifted, as told to me by a developmental pediatrician. Talk to your doctor if you feel you need to, but I would just give him some time. Especially since you say he really wants to talk and is trying.
Have your older son read to his brother. It will help the 2 yr old's verbal skills and can't hurt the 12 yr old. :)
If he won't read to his brother, find someone who will or read to him whenever you can. Reading aloud to toddlers wil do a world of good in more ways than just verbally.
HTH
L.

Read the responses for Betsy from yesterday... seems like those would be good responses for you also.

Just click on REQUESTS AND RESPONSES at the top of the page and then go down to yesterday's responses for Betsy

the title is NOT SPEAKING

You really should talk to the doctor. Your son could have hearing problems. Have your doctor check his ears. It could be that he needs to have tubes put in. My 30 month old was having the same problem. We had tubes put in at 13 months and since then, well, he hasn't quit talking. We have an excellent ENT (ear, nose and throat) specialist, Dr. Robert Burkette, who inserted my sons tubes. He's in the Fort Worth hostpital district, ###-###-####.

R.,
My daughter was almost 2 years old and didn't have many words. She was also having frequent ear infections. We were already seeing the ENT and I mentioned to him that she wasn't really talking. I was wondering if maybe all of the ear infections had caused permanent scar tissue and hearing loss b/c i'd heard that could happen. So, we checked her hearing and she actually had a 50%hearing loss b/c of all of the fluid that was in her ears. We did eventually get ear tubes and she was talking in full sentences literally the next day!! Now she talks non stop. I guess I would go to your pedi and ask about a hearing test.

I had the same worries with my 2nd, who was also a boy. What I was told was boys usually talk later than girls, and when they have an older sibling, they talk less. At about 20 months, my son said things like "mama", "dada", "eat", "more" and maybe a few other simple, 1 word things. My daughter at the same age was singing the Barney song "I love you, you love me..." Needless to say, within 6-7 months, we was talking in full sentences. I would give it more time, but if you are concerned, you should absolutely talk to your doctor about it.