2 Yo Daughter Scared

Updated on March 02, 2012
T.C. asks from Minneapolis, MN
3 answers

My daughter will be 2 in just a few weeks. she is a very smart/stubborn/high maitenence/spirited/funny child. She walked at 8 1/2 months and has always been a bit advanced. She wants to keep up with her older brother. lol. Anyways i would say like the last month she has suddenly became afraid of everything. She has always been a bit more leary with people and things but it has gotten bad. She is now terrified of the bath because she saw a hair in the water one time. She will scream and cling hysterically for bath time. I have to scrub her fast while she is standing and crying the whole time. She was going potty the other day and got scared of something and came running out hysterical and would not sit on the potty again. Im really hoping she is not scared of that now because she has been doing so good with potty training. I feel so bad for her. She is scared of all bugs, and if there is a fuzz or a rasion on the floor that she thinks is a bug she is in hysterics. She will get fuzz from underneith our tablecloth on her fingers and freak out about it. If she sees a ladybug flying in the house she will not go near it till we get it. I have never seen or delt with fears like this before so i dont know if it is a normal stage that she will hopefully outgrow or if i should be more concerned. If she does not out grow it within the next month i will be bringing everything up to her pediatrician at her 2 year check up, but thought id see if anyone else has gone through this in the mean time and if there is anything you have done to help your child overcome fears? It is going to be a very long summer if she does not out grow these fears with all the bugs and mosquitoes we have here. Any advice? Thanks!

*EDIT: I do not ever dismiss her fears. we comfort her and try to show her its ok. I do not expect her to outgrow them in a month and its not the bug fear im concerned about its the fear of a hair, fuzz, raison or anthing that might look like a bug, etc that concerns me.

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S.L.

answers from Kansas City on

I would say you're sorry she's scared but show her it's nothing to be afraid of. Don't comfort beyond just saying you're sorry. Show her bugs outside and let her look at them. Let her feel fuzz or see you hold it and tell her it can't hurt her or you or anyone. She'll outgrow it but it all depends on how much attention she gets from this fear of everything and how much you comfort and move on. It is normal for kids to have some strange fears at certain stages but not of everything. I know some are afraid they'll go down the drain in the bathtub but usually younger than your daughter. Some of those fears are short lived if you comfort quickly and show tell them it's okay but they get over that usually pretty quickly. You don't want a super fearful child so the less said about it the better.

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S.G.

answers from Rapid City on

It could be two things. One is something scared her and made her aware of things can be scary but she doesn't know what to be scared of so she is scared of everything. The other is that she likes the reassurance she is getting when she is scared so she is scared of everything for that reassurance. When she says she is scared of something instead of hugging her and telling her it won't hurt her, explore it with her. Say "Let's see what this is", and get down with her, not forcing her to touch it but you touch it and hold it and show her that it can't hurt her. A lady bug, let it crawl on your hand and say the lady bug song "lady bug lady bug" and always offer to let her hold it if she wants, if not say "ok, you don't have to". It will take a while but she will get more secure with her surroundings.

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L.D.

answers from Minneapolis on

I'm glad you're not dismissing her fears!

Choose your battles. If she decides she's afraid the Loch Ness monster, no worries--there's little chance she'll ever meet one. However, If she's afraid of bugs, lint, or raisins, engage. Because those things are a part of life.

So be matter of fact. "Yep. That's a bug." And move on. Whatever you do, DON'T OVER-comfort her. That may prompt her to seek more comfort in the future (by acting scared of everything).

If she continues, deflect the energy of fear by building humor onto your matter-of-factness. Be extremely silly. "Yep. That's a bug. He's probably pinching his nose because of your stinky feet. Let's wave your stinky feet near him!" or something equally silly. (Sorry-I have boys, so stinky things are an endless source of humor)

Or "Yep. That's a raisin. Let's use 'the force' and see if we can make it move." Anyway...I'm trying for humor. Little kids seem to find me pretty funny, which I love! (not sure what grown-ups think of me :)

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