2 Year Old Still Not Talking at All

Updated on April 27, 2010
A.E. asks from Church Hill, TN
15 answers

My daughter recently turned 2 and is still not talking at all. She has said mama a few times but I don't think she is talking to me when she says it just making sounds. She will babble and hum. She likes to point to things in books, etc and I will tell her what/who they are. She is a very poor sleeper and wakes up many times a night to nurse. She is very orally fixated and is constantly chewing on something and nurses frequently. I know she can hear but often ignores when being talked to. She does make eye contact though. She will only eat crunchy foods like crackers, very limited diet and small for her age. She hates blankets and shoes and despises the car seat. She screams if I put her in the car and recently has started throwing up in the car so I think she may be carsick. I'm so exhausted and frustrated and don't know what to help her. We have had some speech therapy but it's not helped at all. Trying to get in with an OT but haven't been able to yet. What can I do to help her??
We have been getting speech therapy through early intervention for several months now. They couldn't get an OT to come to the house because of insurance and the one we went to to have her evaluated is impossible to get an appointment with now. Plus there is the problem of getting her anywhere because of the car issues. It's a big mess. :(
Thanks for all the responses. I don't believe she is teething, the waking has been going on consistently forever. Also we co-sleep.
The car seat is front facing in the middle but i can move that around. Any good natural remedies for motion sickness?
The early intervention people are super slow at getting things started. We have insurance but this is a small town and there just aren't many OTs and other specialists around. And obviously its' hard to travel. You may be right about her not being car sick. She hates being in the car but she hasn't thrown up from being upset before anywhere else, only the car so that's why I thought she was probably motion sick. Thanks!

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So What Happened?

um no she is not old to be nursing....are you aware that WHO reccommends nursing for AT LEAST 2 years and that there are many continued benefits...and she would starve, will not eat regular food, that's one of the problems....I have no wish to wean and believe in child led weaning. Also not putting her in daycare though I would like to get her in a playgroup or something. Thanks.

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M.B.

answers from Wilmington on

Stick with the speech therapy and early intervention. My Grandson wasn't talking and one year later he was talking up a storm, and very clear! Getting her in an early intervention preschool like Smart Start or Head Start gives her socialization that helps. She might be labeled with a sensory disorder or an autism spectrum disorder but it gets the help she needs and NOW, and many children outgrow these characteristics.

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N.K.

answers from Madison on

I agree with the others that you should take her to a neurodevelopmental pediatrician.

I would also get her ears checked by a good pediatric ENT (ear-nose-throat) specialist. There may be something wrong with the middle/inner ear. Such a problem would cause her not to hear well (causing speech delays), not be able to sleep well (because of pain and discomfort) and it may also be related to motion sickness (middle ear is involved in the sense of balance).
You may find this informative:
http://www.nidcd.nih.gov/health/hearing/otitism.asp

It may even be the cause of her sensory issues, as the middle ear is involved in in processing sensations from touch, muscles, joints
and head movements (vestibular or inner ear sensations).

So, I would say, get her ears checked by a really good pediatric ENT.

3 moms found this helpful
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M.R.

answers from Columbus on

Call the nearest children's hospital and make an appointment with a Developmental Pediatrican. This is not your regular pediatrician, this is a specialist who will do a complete evaluation that includes speech and langauge, OT, PT, neurology, ENT, educational, psychological and genetic evaluations if they are called for. You will miss nothing and have one report that gives you a plan to follow for her treatment. You may get a diagnosis, and you may not like it, but you will know exactly what you have in front of you and know what path to take.

In the mean time, contact the state early education evaluation team in TN and get them out to evaluate her, and take what ever you can get from them. If you are not satisfied with your speech therapist, find a new one and get as much therapy as you can. Call an OT who can see her sooner. If money is an issue, call Easter Seals, they can help with evaluations and treatment.

If she is going to be three soon, call your school district. They will be responsible for evaluating her and providing school based services (and she may quailfiy for more than just speech therapy) once she turns three. See if you can get the evaluation scheduled to coincide with her birthday instead of waiting for her birthday to start the process, it can take a while, so the sooner you start, the better. Ask for a copy of your rights from them, and read it. Find out how long they have to evaluate her, and meet with you, then make sure they follow that timeline.

Last, you obviously know that you have an issue and have done some research about what is and isn't OK. But be very careful. It is a mistake to say she can do any one thing and think that that may disqualify her from having the disorder you are thinking she may have. It does not work that way. Making eye contact is not what it seems. What she does with the information she gets from you when she looks at you is the issue, not whether or not she ever does. Likewise, pointing at pictures in a book so that you will tell her what it is, is not the pointing that they are talking about in the developmental screen. They are talking about pointing to gain joint attention for mutual language tasks. You are entertaining her by telling her what these things are and she is passive in the exchange.

It will be OK, keep working with her at home too, and get her as much therapy as you can, but get that evaluation by a Developmental Pediatrician. Time is one of the only things you will have that is free, don't waste it.

M.

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B.P.

answers from New York on

I think you have to get her to a neurodevelopmental pediatrician to have her evaluated. There are just waaaay to many issues to ignore. I really sympathize with you. I don't think she's carsick...lots of kids throw up when they are upset or angry.

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T.B.

answers from Memphis on

I have close friends who have dealt with the same issues with their toddlers. One child was given the suggestion to begin in an daycare like settingto be around other children. The mother enrolled him in an early childhood program which also caused her to stop nursing. Within a short amount of time the child was speaking. My other close friend's child was diagnosed with autism. He has been enrolled in an early childhood special needs class and is receiving awesome help through the public schools system.
Have you tried sitting in the car as a game? Sometimes turning things into games helps with young children. If that won't help, cut garbage bags, cover the seats. Do the same with her seat. She can wear a disposable/plastic bib. That way clean up is easy and you can get where you are going. I'm sure this won't last long. Sometimes children make themselves vomit when they don't want to do something. I've dealt with that personally.:-) Also keeping her very active (if they she is staying at home) is key to helping sleep at night. I found that out the hard way. My little one just wasn't tired.
Stay in encouraged. Keep researching and consulting doctors. God Bless you with your little one and know that prayer does work.

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E.M.

answers from Louisville on

wow sounds like this little one has a lot going on. you need to wean her off the breast esp since shes waking up so much at night to nurse it will be hard but shes a little old to be nursing. she should be eating regular food now. you need to call her ped and have her seen asap. sorry i couldnt be more help

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A.B.

answers from Charlotte on

Hi A.,
You've received some great practical advice from moms who are obviously pros at advocating for their children. I hope their info leads you to help for your daughter. (She's *so cute*, btw! )

I just wanted to commiserate with your exhaustion and feelings of being overwhelmed. Though my daughter is now 13, I remember those early days of never sleeping and never being able to comfort her like they were yesterday. When I began to learn about her disorders (sensory and Selective Mutism), it added to the overwhelm, because there was so much to learn and seemingly, no time to learn it all. But have hope.....you'll obviously keep going until you find answers for your daughter, and as you see improvement, things will get exponentially better!

Something I wish I'd done then: accept any offers of help from others. It's cliche, but, the more rest and sleep you can get, the better you'll be able to take care of her. And, have fun with her whenever possible.....as in, it's okay to drop the advocate/therapist/detective roles and just *play* together. She'll be an adolescent before you know it!

Best of luck to you!

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S.B.

answers from Savannah on

I would switch therapists then. Speech therapy takes some time---how much has she had? My daughter has been in it for almost 2 yrs now. She speaks very well---but there's always room for improvement. OT sounds like it would benefit her as well. But I am willing to bet they would like her in ST as well.

Do you have PSI (pre-school intervention) programs in TN? You could ask the therapist and it will be covered by the state. I was initially paying for therapy via insurance but was stuck with out of pocket costs that were pricey. I found out they had PSI and I got her enrolled after she was evaluated and showed a need for it. I don't pay a dime now and she goes to a speech therapist and occupational therapist weekly.

Good luck.

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M.C.

answers from Washington DC on

Ahh.

Some things to consider:
- talk to your pediatrician about getting a sleep study. There has to be a reason she wakes up often.
- talk to your ped about if she might have weak tongue muscles. If she does, it would explain why she wakes up, prefers crunchy foods over soft, and isn't trying to form some letters/words.
- try putting some teethers in her crib. If she's orally fixated, it could be that she's teething.
- try putting her carseat on the other side of the car, or even back to being rear-facing. I know it sounds weird, but my hubby only gets carsick when he's sitting on the right-side of the car....
- think like Sesame Street, Dora, etc. Kids programs always repeat letters, words, phrases 2-3 times. When you read a book to her, read it 2x.
- when she points for something, repeat the word to her 2-3x. Don't just hand her whatever she wants.

Hugs.
M.

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B.C.

answers from Joplin on

Do you have Parents as Teachers in your area? PAT come to your house. Also if you have First Steps, a lot of those therpist will come to your house as well, my youngest recieves ABA therapy and speech therapy and he at one time had other therapists who als ocame to our house through First Steps. It sounds like your daughter has some sensory processing disorders. I would venture a guess that she is not carsick but something about the car/carseat, leaving the familiarity of home is so stressful that she will make herself get sick, my autistic niece does this ( not for the same reason) all the time. I am by no means saying she is Autistic, my son was severely speech delayed as well, he is nearly 3 and after almost a year of therapy we have made huge strides. Switching therapists might not be a bad idea, sometimes it takes a while to find the right match. First Steps is income based, if that helps.
Wish I had more advice...I really empathize with how you must feel, it is a difficult thing to go through and so hard when you don't know what you can do to make it better. Lots of research you can do on the web, educate yourself as best as possible and arm yourself with knowledge when you go to her pediatrician.
If you want to talk about any of the therapy that Alex has been going through feel free to message me. I would definitely check into PAT if I was you.
B.

Updated

Do you have Parents as Teachers in your area? PAT come to your house. Also if you have First Steps, a lot of those therpist will come to your house as well, my youngest recieves ABA therapy and speech therapy and he at one time had other therapists who als ocame to our house through First Steps. It sounds like your daughter has some sensory processing disorders. I would venture a guess that she is not carsick but something about the car/carseat, leaving the familiarity of home is so stressful that she will make herself get sick, my autistic niece does this ( not for the same reason) all the time. I am by no means saying she is Autistic, my son was severely speech delayed as well, he is nearly 3 and after almost a year of therapy we have made huge strides. Switching therapists might not be a bad idea, sometimes it takes a while to find the right match. First Steps is income based, if that helps.
Wish I had more advice...I really empathize with how you must feel, it is a difficult thing to go through and so hard when you don't know what you can do to make it better. Lots of research you can do on the web, educate yourself as best as possible and arm yourself with knowledge when you go to her pediatrician.
If you want to talk about any of the therapy that Alex has been going through feel free to message me. I would definitely check into PAT if I was you.
B.

E.L.

answers from Charleston on

Our 2 yo daughter who we recently adopted has limited speech. She was born 12 weeks premature. When she came to us just less than 2 months ago she said very few words. She is due for her speech and early chld development prevention check up next month and I believe they will be amazed at the progress she has made in such a short amount of time!! Her vocabulary has improved so much!
We practice singing and talking every day. Like your daughter she would point at what she wanted so I would keep repeating the names of the items (toy, food, etc.) and sometimes make a rhyme or song for it -- anything to make it fun so she would pick up on it. Its still difficult for others to understand some of the words she tries to say but she has increased others by 200%!
Your daughter may be picking up on your stress level too. I know how frustrating all of this must be for you and how worried you are about her. My niece, who is now almost 4, was the same way. She barely spoke a word it seemed until she was about 2 1/2. She would butt her head against the floor when she was mad, and pinch and hit us. Then it seemed one day all of that disappeared. Now we can't seem to get her to keep quiet- she talks almost as well as my teenage girls! But when she's around her mom she reverts more to acting like a baby.
I've read some of these other responses and I have to agree with those about making sure you have had a complete hearing exam performed. A friend of mine went through a similiar situation with her 1 1/2 yo son- he had to have tubes placed. His speech improved dramatically within just a couple of months!!
I wish you the best of luck!!

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M.M.

answers from Knoxville on

have you had her chack for this

Rett Syndrome (RTT) is a debilitating neurological disorder diagnosed almost exclusively in females. Children with RTT appear to develop normally until 6 to 18 months of age when they enter a period of regression, losing speech and motor skills. Most develop repetitive hand movements, irregular breathing

this is Sabrina Maynard My Sister's Daughter site
http://www.myspace.com/sabrinamaynard14

M.

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C.D.

answers from Los Angeles on

Get her into an early intervention program pronto! Find out what is offered in your area. They will also provide the ST and OT and anything else she might need!

Good luck!
C.
www.littlebitquirky.blogspot.com

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M.S.

answers from Hickory on

I am an Early Childhood teacher. My girl did not talk till she was almost 2. She is now 6 years and will not stop. She is AG in her studies. She was so far above the children in her class we pulled her and our son who also is AG to home school them. You could have her looked at for Autism if you are worried about all this. Could she be waking up because of the co-sleeping? Some kids wake every time you move. She could be a light sleeper.

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K.B.

answers from Houston on

As Cheryl said call early intervention. Here is the Tennessee information:

http://www.tn.gov/education/teis/

Good luck,
K.

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