2 Year Old "Shoots" Mom or Dad Out of Frustration

This makes me laugh:
I don't mind the occasional shooting because I know "boys will be boys".

While pretending is fine, the way you say it makes me think the occasional killing is fine.. just don't go overboard!

I know it's not what you meant, it's just where my head goes.

I think you are making too much of this.
Just my opinion.
You grab him and take him outside and tell him he can't come back in until he's done shooting....
But you're doing this because you don't think him "shooting" is appropriate.
I'm 48 and I'm confused by this logic.
I know little kids that have never been allowed to watch TV or even have a squirt gun and they will pick a stick up in the yard and pretend like they are shooting. Little kids will pretend they are shooting with their own fingers.
It's part of imaginative play.
Your 2-1/2 year old isn't going to grow up shooting people.

I come from a generation where kids watched Wide World of Disney and Bonanza on TV on Sunday nights. They played cowboys and indians. They played good guys and bad guys.
I had a good friend whose dad loved telling me stories about stuff he did when he was a little kid.
My favorite was that he was playing outside, as kids were allowed to do back then, and the dad went to check on him and his friends. He said he could have died. There was his son with tampons hanging from his belt. He asked him what in the world he was doing and Nicky replied, "We're playing. This is my dynamite."

He didn't sit him down and explain what tampons are for or why blowing things up is bad.
His mom kept the tampons out of reach after that since they weren't exactly toys and that was his dad's favorite story.

You could be confusing imagination with "gun safety".
If your son knows that daddy uses guns, he's going to pretend doing it too.
His finger is not a dangerous weapon.
He's not going to hold up a bank with it.

I would have said something like, "Your bullets don't work on me. Eat your broccoli."

Again, this is just my opinion.

The only advice I can think of is the more attention you give a behavior, the more power you give the child. So...maybe try something that diffuses the power you're giving him when he shoots you. Perhaps if he shoots you, you can correct him, and have him shoot at the wall or something, saying "We don't shoot people. You can shoot the wall here." Correct him every time and point to different things that are okay that he shoots. But give VERY LITTLE power to him when he shoots directly at you or else you're going to be setting yourself up for some bigger battles. If you give it very little power, it'll stay a smaller deal.

I do love the response of "your bullets don't work on me, now eat your food" because I think that would work.

HOWEVER, nowadays our society is so sensitive to anything related to guns because of the school shootings. I do know that your son could get kicked out of daycare for even pretending to have a gun (yes, it's happened!) and if he was older in school and did that sort of thing toward a teacher or another student, he could be suspended. Even as young as kindergarten!! (I think it's over the top personally, but that's the way it is). In our cheerleading competitions the girls aren't allowed to make any sort of gun gesture and a squad was disqualified for it when they did it as part of a CUTE cowgirl routine. They made a gun with their fingers and pretended to blow on it while winking at the audience. Ridiculous, I know!

I think you just need to curb it now and let him know that guns are not to be aimed at people. I think a simple "we don't point pretend guns at people" and then a consequence like a time-out or a behind swat (depending on your parenting style) would work if you did it consistently.

We played with cap guns and BB guns as kids and my dad would have had our hide if we ever pointed it toward someone, even unloaded or in play. Sometimes that's all it takes!

We have always taught our children that they are not allowed to shoot at people. We only play/pretend what we would do in real life. So, at that age, I would tell him not to shoot at Mommy. I wouldn't take him outside to keep shooting. I don't think he probably makes that connection. But, I would be stern about shooting at people. He also needs to tell you he is sorry. I think that is an important step as it requires an action from them in a way that shows obedience. We have never had an issue with our kids playing with play guns. That isn't the thing that bugs us. It is how they play with the guns that matter. Just like real life.

My dad and brothers hunted, own guns with permits, I learned how to shoot at 12, etc., so I don't have a problem with guns, per se. But I'm with you, I don't like the "shooting" at people, either.

My guy is 2.5 as well, and the last few months picked up on "shooting" at people with his fingers, hands and small branches from his 10 year old cousin. (His cousin has been diagnosed with ADHD, and his parents allow him to do a lot of things I find inappropriate, but he is theirs to discipline and train.) We told the little guy from the beginning he is not to "shoot" at anyone, only things like a tree or fence. We know he's playing but we want him to know using guns on people is a big no-no.

The first few times he "shot" at someone we said, "No, not at so and so, we don't shoot at people." When he kept it up it became a "time-out" situation. Anytime he pointed anything at someone to shoot, it was time for a time-out. Your post made me realize he hasn't been shooting at anyone for about a month now, so it worked : )

Since shooting outside isn't teaching your son to not shoot at people, tell him from now on when he does it he earns a time-out. He's young and impulsive, so it's going to take many more times than a few to get him to unlearn the behavior. Be consistent and hang in there!

When you take him outside and tell him to shoot you are telling him it's OK to do this. Taking him outside is not a consequence. He gets to do what he wants to do. Very confusing.

I suggest you need to tell him, at the time, that shooting someone is not an acceptable way to show his displeasure. Teach him to use his words. Model them for him. "I'm angry that I have to take 2 more bites." You respond with "I know you're angry but you still have to take 2 more bites. Of course he's not going to say all those words. He could say just I'm mad.

If you use timeouts putting him in timeout if he continues to do this would be appropriate. It could just be a matter of remaining in his chair for 2 minutes before you insist on the 2 bites. I'm not sure time outs are effective, especially at this age.

I agree with Teresa. You keep from giving him power by responding in an unemotional and matter of fact, this is not appropriate instead of in an upset way. When children are able to get their parents upset they feel powerful.

What sort of punishment does he get for other things? Throwing something across the room, for example? My son did similar at age 3, but did no use the words "shoot shoot." He just pointed his 'gun' at me and made a 'bang bang' noise with an angry look on his face. I told him if he pointed his pretend gun at me like that out of anger, then he would be in trouble (be that spanking or time-out or whatever consequence you have at your house). It took about a week, but got it under control. He knows he can play guns with his dad and other boys that come over (if their parents are okay with gun play) but that he may not do so out of anger when he's mad at something I've said to him.

Don't stop with what you are doing. It really does sink in.

When my kids were toddlers they too went through that phase, especially my son. My husband and I were firm in our opposition to guns but finally had to give in.....(this was hard because it was when Star Wars first came out!) so we made the rule that he could only shoot non living things when he played guns with his finger, a stick, or when someone gave him a cowboy gun. That limited him to buildings, targets, the ground, rocks. I know he did the good guy, bad guy thing when I wasn't around and he got older, but a lot less than others. He grew up to be a gentle, respecting, peaceful guy.

The thing is it did sink in. He has a four year old now and strangely when she started the shooting thing I heard my very words come out of his mouth. I think she will be a pretty neat kid too.

Unfortunately they do not have any impulse control at this age. Just keep
doing what you are doing. Consistency is the key. Definitely do not give
him any attention. When he shoots at someone he knows he is going
outside. Just do not have a big discussion with him. To him negative
attention is just as great as positive. Good luck.