Our 2 year old does not sleep thru the night and I don't know why and am looking for suggestions to change her behavior. Most nights she wakes up and she wants a drink of milk. I take her downstairs, she takes a drink, I take her back to her room, rub her back and she falls back asleep. This whole process takes about 20-25 mins. Then there are the nights (like last night)where she wakes up at 2:00am and is up till 5:00 or 5:30!!! She is not fussy, she just wants to get up. She wants to have something to drink or go to the bathroom or watch a movie. I allow her one drink and one trip to the bathroom and that is it. I don't know what is causing her to wake up and stay up, but it is taking its toll on us and her.
We stick to a routine nightly, bath at 7:30, something to eat at 8:00 (like mac-n-cheese or pizza), a movie and in bed by 9:00. My daughter has to wake up daily at 6:30 for daycare, so it's not like she can sleep in on the nights she does this. This has been going on for months and I am now 7 months pregnant and would like to put an end to this before the new baby arrives.
I've had some say to lock her door from the outside and let her cry. The problem I have is, she's just awake (we've all had days where we just can't sleep), it's not like she is being bad. The last thing I want to do is make her afraid of her own room or being in her bed because when she does sleep, she loves sleeping in there in the dark. I also play soft music and have a fan on low for white noise.
Any thoughts on breaking the wake up habit??
I just wanted to say THANK YOU to those that responded. We cut out the carbby late night meal and there is no 30 min movie before bed these days. First 3 days didn't make a difference, but our daughter has now slept thru the night the last 5 nights in a row!!!! YEAH!! I am soooooo happy. Thanks again for the help!
My stepdaughter used to do this. My husband had a talk with her and said it was important to not wake us up unless it was an emergency. She was able to get herself a drink and use the potty and go back to bed.
I'm having a similar problem of super early waking (can you say 5am is too early to be up for the day, thank you very much) just all of a sudden with my nearly 3 yr old. I have a couple things I am trying out just starting today to fix my problem.
1. Earlier bed time. Check out the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" It was my bible when the colicy baby wouldn't sleep or nap and was up super early, and strangely enough an earlier bed time did the trick. As they say in that book, "sleep begets sleep".
2. No cartoons and kiddie programs after nap time. DS is rather spirited, and I think watching his shows in the afternoon puts him in over drive.
3. At least a few minutes playing outside right after breakfast and again right after nap, to help keep his internal clock regulated.
Good luck, and stay consistant on whatever path you take.
C., Battle Creek
I would start by not getting her out of the bed when she wakes up. Have a cup of water in the room for a drink. Drinking milk at night isn't good for her teeth anyway. Don't talk to her except for offering the drink of water. Then tuck her back in and say goodnight, then leave the room. It's ok if she cries, she's going to have to for you to break the habit of her getting up in the night. Good luck and I hope she's sleeping before the baby comes
Hi M.,
Don't give her milk at night and give her protein instead of pizza or mac and cheese. She might actually be hungry by the time the middle of the night rolls around because the carby stuff isn't doing anything to satisfy her body for the long run. Can she go potty by herself? I let my girls know that its ok to get up and go potty (or come get me for that if they needed to but I didn't say that right away cause they'd pick up on getting up for that) and that everyone wakes up in the night sometimes, but that we stay in bed.
I let them know it was ok to be up, but that they couldnt wake up the rest of us and they had to stay in their beds. I left my door open and on my way to bed I would open theirs too. I would hear them talking to themselves, sometimes they would sneak out and get something to take back to bed and play with, but it didnt last long. They learned to put themselves back to sleep and that it was ok to be up by themselves as long as they didnt get out and run around.
Congratulations on the new one to come and good luck with this, I'm sure she'll be back to sleeping through the night in no time.
L.
I have told my 2yr old that we only drink water at night. I give her a sippy cup of water to take to bed. She also brings a book and a stuff animal. If she wakes in the middle of the night I don't go rushing in. She might drink her water, she has a night light to see her book or she might talk with her stuff animal. She will usually call for me and I calmly and quietly reassure her from her doorway that it is still night and to go back to sleep. She has tried the I need to go potty thing which she still needs some assistance with so I pick her up tell her to lay her head on my shoulder. I don't look at her or talk with her more than that in the middle of the night. I keep all lights off except for a small night light even in the bathroom. I lay her back in her room and leave right away and reassure her from the doorway. I think others had good ideas too. ex. earlier bedtime, no tv close to bedtime, only a small protein snack and not too close to bedtime, outside play early in the morning and right after nap and I think you are on the right track by not wanting to lock her in her room for your situation. Good luck and hope you all get a good nights sleep soon.
I think a good first step is to eliminate the late eating as well as the movie at least 2 hours before bed. The eating will keep/wake her up and require her trip to the bathroom, and the movie is stimulation rather than relaxation. Also, the milk during the night is not good for her teeth. You should limit her to water, not only for her teeth, but it may be less desirable and she may not want it as often unless she is truly thirsty (not just an excuse to get up). Also, I would make the bath the last task of the evening. She's clean, warm, and relaxed. Brush her teeth, put her jammies on and have her pick out a book for you to read to her. Earlier in the evening you may want to wear her out by taking her outside to play, walk, ride a bike, etc.
Make it clear (with repetition) that getting up is not fun time. Allow her a drink of water if she wishes (maybe even keep a cup on her night stand so she doesn't have to disrupt you - we do this), a trip to the potty, then it's back to bed. I would allow her to lay in bed quietly with a book and nothing else. No toys and no mom (hard I know, I've been there). If she is very upset, then go in and calm her down and reassure her. I totally agree with not making her hate her room, as that will only make it worse. We don't even use our son's room for punishment.
You're right to want to solve the issue now, or she will be up with you and the baby at the wee morning hours and think it's ok since mommy & baby are up too. Best of luck and congratulations! (I have a 3 year old and a 4 month old myself.)
Hi - I feel for you - sleeping issues are the worst!
Here's my advice...stop the high-carb late snack and put her to sleep earlier in the evening. She has to get up early and 2-yr-olds should be sleeping for 11-12 hours at night (from what I've read/heard from our pediatrician). I'd put her down at 7-730. I'd also skip the movie. A bedtime routine that works for our family (1 year old and 3 year old) is dinner at 530, bath immediately after dinner, and then winding down while picking up toys in their rooms/play area and then books to read and then bed.
HANG IN THERE! Congrats on the new baby-to-be!
Oh My! Sounds like our house 3 short months ago. Our daughter is 2 1/2 and we just had our son (he's now 2 months).
She was getting up 2-3 times a night. We tried the earlier bed time (she goes to bed at 9) and it was not working, she was getting enough sleep and it made it worse for us to do that.
We instead, kept her bedtime at the same time, give her a bath before bed, sometimes a snack if she wants one (popcorn, crackers). And we will read to her. She will not lay down w/o one of us laying on the floor with her until she falls asleep, but it takes 1/2 hour from start to finish. She sometimes gets up in the middle of the night b/c she is scared or wet.
I also sat her down and explained to her (as much as you can someone her age), that the bed she has is a special bed I got for her and she needs to be a big girl and sleep in it. (her's in a handmedown from her cousins and she adores them). She then started sleeping through the night and has recently only been getting up at 4am and then going right back to bed.
Keep in mind with the baby comes, your daughter may get up when she hears the baby crying (if their rooms are close together). We about jump out of bed when my son wakes up to keep her from waking up.
We also bought a white noise machine, but she thinks it's too loud in her room. I told her it was to get the stinky smell out of her room. after a week of using it, I turned it off and she's still staying in her own bed after doing all the above as well.
Good luck and keep on working at it with her!
My daughter, who is now 4, used to do the same thing. Wake up in the middle of the night asking for a drink. I would give it to her at first, after the first time it became an every night thing. After a while I figured out she was doing it because she could, because she was eating well during the day, she shouldn't be wanting anything at night, so I stopped giving her what she asked for. Maybe 15-20 mins before bed I'd give a drink, then make her go to the bathroom right before bed. I told her that the drink she got would be the last until morning. She wasn't happy at first but after a couple of days, she was back to sleeping thru the night. I would say just don't give her the drink, I'm sure she's getting plenty of fluids during the day. If she's not being bad, don't lock her room. Just leave her and let her get herself back to sleep. She'll figure out that she's not going to get what she wants and she'll give up trying to get it.
This is just my opinion, but here it is. :) I think you should start by giving her something lighter to eat at night. Try fruit or crackers or something easier to digest. Mac and cheese or pizza could be keeping her body up because it takes more work to digest those things. If it were me, I'd also switch from watching a movie to reading books or something that does not stimulate her mind so much. Good luck! Hope you find the solution!
Hi M.,
You have to teach her to go back to sleep by herself when she wakes up. What she is doing is forcing herself to wake up. Most people (including kids) wake up throughout the night but as adults we just go back to sleep. She forces herself awake because she knows you will do things with her, get her milk, bathroom, movie, ect. You need to teach her to go back to sleep by herself. I would start by when she wakes up put her back to bed don't really communicate with her. When she tries to get up put her back to bed but don't say anything. Keep doing this without communicating with her. Don't get mad at her just keep putting her back to bed. Eventually she will realize that you aren't going to give in and go to sleep. My first son we did this with. The first night he got up 56 times. My husband and I took turns so that we wouldn't lose our cool with him. The next night it was only 12 times and the third night he didn't get up. He was about the same age when we did this. He is now almost 4 and has slept through the night since we did this. The first couple of nights you may not get a lot of sleep but it is worth it in the end. Hopefully you will get this solved before the baby comes. Good luck
Chris
HOpe things are still going smoothly...
Stop the high carby bedtime snack, shoot for protien (cheese stick or "light" yogurt) And stop the right before bed movie as well.
The carbs are going to give her a high prior to bed and then the added stimulus of the movie is going to just add fuel to the fire.
Try 2 weeks of a high protien bedtime snack and reading a book before bed. Also provide her with a cup of water at night in case of thirst.
I agree with what most of the moms have said - change your nightly routine a little. Start with the movie and snack (high protein), then move toward the bath and a quiet story at just before she goes to sleep. Keep a cup of water by the bedside, and tell her that milk is for when it's light out only. Talk to her, reassure her, but make sure she stays in her room with the lights off or really low. Limiting to one bathroom trip a night is a good idea. I think not letting her out of the room is the key, cause she starts to get stimulated by the new rooms, lights, prospect of milk and playtime. Don't punish her, just gently but firmly let her understand that it's not as fun as she thinks it is to get up in the middle of the night.
