Hi ladies. Here's the dilemma. My son is turning 1 April 19th. For both of my daughters, we have usually had both sides of our families here for the 1st bday plus our close friends and their kids. It ends up being about 40 or 50 people.
My house is SMALL. 1400 sf. The girls bdays are July and Sept so we have always been able to be out in the backyard. April is iffy weather wise, and absolutely we cannot count on being able to be outdoors.
Money is VERY tight for us, so doing it at a restaurant is not in the budget.
I could of course trim it down and only have immediate family like grandparents on both sides but a) the 2 families don't like one another, so if it's just them it gets awkward and b) I would feel bad because it is just not what I did for the older siblings and c) personally I would love to include everyone. I have friends who adore him and WANT to be included in this celebration.
Does anyone know of a good idea I may be missing of a space to use very cheaply or a way to do this that I am not thinking of?
I truly appreciate any good ideas! Hubby (whom I adore) is useless about this, saying nothing helpful other than "we have no money to do it at a place" and "we can't fit everyone in our house". Thanks!
Thank you so much for all the ideas. I was inspired from your thoughts, and called several local town and county park departments, community rooms, library, etc. All of them were a big "no".
I tried our church, no.
I finally tried the nursery school (which was a church school) my girls used to go to and got a YES! They have a space, that is free - they just ask for a donation.
I am going to do this, and let everyone know. I'm so happy and excited. this is totally what I want to do. thank you!
I have actually held two separate parties before. That way no one is left out and the space issues are gone. Doesn't cost any more money either!
To keep the cost down only serve cake ice cream and lemonade..
Your child is only 1..
This party is more for you than it is for him.
Do not stress, this is supposed to be fun.
If you belong to a church, you should be able to utilize the fellowship hall very inexpensively.
separate parties is probably your best bet. but feeling bad because you did something different before? my dear, really. he's 1. he doesn't care a rap. you will do about 534 gazillion things differently for him than you've done for the girls in coming years. you need to let that part go.
:) khairete
S.
Happy birthday kiddo!
And your house isn't small. We live in a glorified tree fort. It's like 920 sq ft including our stupid unfinished basement. Can't WAIT to move in May!!
That being said, we've still had parties with 20+ people ;) Where there's a will, there's a way.
Why not NOT celebrate ON his birthday? Have dinner with your family one day, dinner with his another, then do close friends and your immediate family (you, husband, your children) ON his actual birthday? That solves everything ;)
If you can't pay for a place, maybe one of these would work:
Have two separate parties
Ask a close family member or friend with a larger house if you can have it there.
Invite less people
Have it at your church if you go to one
Great ideas so far- try a library room, church room, or do two different days. Or, you could stagger it- sort of 'open house' style. So it would last for 4-5 hours and you could have people come 'anytime between this and this', or if you are worried that the majority of people would still show up all at once, then state the first two hours for some and the last two hours for others. There will be a little overlap, but if they really don't like each other than they'll get out of there! Good luck!
Do you have a park close by? We have some parks here that have indoor pavillions that you can rent for fairly cheap- we had our football party there it was about 60 people and not crowded you might want to check with your local Parks and Rec
Do two different days. Don't plan either on the birthday that way they can not whine over being left out of the big day. Beside, a party for a one year old is for everyone else, not the baby. Yeah learned that the hard way, everyone had a blast but my poor baby. Good luck it is tough. Be honest," my house is small, having both families at the same time would be struggle and we want the grandparents(etc) to be able to enjoy their time baby. So we decided this will work best for all of us." Than repeat, repeat, repeat repeat, till they get it.
I got this down, took a while, but our families now know they can not bully me into their drama anymore.
I lived in a house that was 1023 sq feet and we invited everyone over! We were packed in like sardines, but it was fun. I live in a state that you can't count on the weather, even in August, but folks stood outside, in the garage, in bedrooms. It was fine.
I also have a brother who lives in a tiny tiny house and his family does the birthday celebrations at my mom and dad's house because it is so much bigger. Can you possibly go to a family members larger house and "borrow" it for the day?
I do want you to think about what you wrote for B. Your son will never know what his other siblings got, so please don't use that as a reason to do the big party if you don't want to.
L.
My local library has a "Friends Room" that can be reserved for a day, and is completely free. Might be worth checking into!! We had my son's first 4 birthday parties there, and it was a nice neutral place for both sides of the family to meet, since they don't always get along.
If I were in your shoes I would hold two different parties or ask another family member to host it.
OR....cut your close friends....I'm sure they would understand.
do you belong to a church? if so most churches have a hall of some sort that you could use. ours has a big hall below the church. we can use it for free. perhaps check on that.
I don't know about the place part - we had our daughters first birthday outside b/c we had a small townhouse - at a beautiful park with a pavilion, but it was a cold and rainy yuck day. The next year when we were in our 3000 sf home, it was a beautiful day. Whadya gonna do?? Maybe one of the grandma's or aunts have a larger home and you can offer to help clean and set everything up if they would let you use their home.
But to save money, can it be a pock luck - would you feel comfortable asking a few people to bring munchies (chips/dips/crackers/cheese etc) have some other people bring ice cream, some others bring sides, several people bring drinks, and you provide the main dish and the cake? You'd have to be organized and specific so everyone doesn't bring the same thing, but it could work. This is what we do for the big holidays in our family - the host passes out food assignments and usually the same people bring the same stuff every year.
Is there a community center or church hall that you can rent out for little money? I know a place that only charges $40 from noon -6. Look for places like that.
Do you have a garage? We have an attached garage that we threw my daughter's 4th birthday party in....that was in mid November.
My youngest's 2nd birthday is April 22nd. I know what you are going through!!! :)
is there a place where you can rent a tent for cheap? Or know someone who has one? you could pitch it in your back yard.
April is hard month! My husbands is the 13th and some years we have camped out and other years still wearing our winter jackets.. good luck.
Or even a friends house that might let you do it there since both families don't get along you wouldn't want it at a family memebers house.
peter piper pizza or a chuckie cheese?
Check out the library or local community center. Many of them have rooms you can rent for pretty cheap. If you are part of an HOA check with them about any kind of community center for your neighborhood, again if you have one it is pretty cheap to rent them for the day.
We had 37 people for our son's first birthday in our 900 sq foot apartment. It was a little tight but fun. Our guests largely staggered themselves. Our family came before the party, and left as it was getting underway. Friends with children were encouraged to leave in a party game fashion, "grab your monster (it was a monster party), your shoes, your coat, your mommy and or daddy and line up at the door to collect your favor." Friends without kids hung out for an hour or so afterwards helped us open and record gifts for thank yous, tidy, and enjoyed some time with DS without all the commotion.
If your guests won't self stagger, you might want to suggest that they come and leave in a similar fashion, and point out how its in their own best interest to do so. (Mom & Dad, MIL & FIL, you don't really want to be here with all the kids and the commotion do you?, Friends with kids, you don't really want to have your kids on best behavior for that long a time? Friends without kids, you don't want to be near that ruckus do you?)
Good luck to you and yours,
F. B.
