16 Years Old and a Car

A couple things come to mind, the first is your husband is right if you buy it they will not take care of it.

The second is if they don't work during high school why the heck do they need a car? So they can goof with friends? I am serious, you have to consider that if they have time to hang out with friends along with school work and sports they have enough time to work! Allowing them to goof, to have everything handed to them will send the wrong message.

I really don't understand this idea younger parents have that working will effect school work. It doesn't, what it does is cuts into time they have to play with their friends. When it hits the college level if they are used to having time to play with their friends guess what they cut to continue? Yup, school work.

Just throwing this out there but my kids maintained a 3.8 while working. In college my daughter at one point had 18 hours going, her real job and two internships, still a 3.8. She forgot what her friends looked like for a while mind you. She got several job offers before graduation, her friends that didn't work, did not.

We are lucky to have three cars, so our kids drive the third one.
Between school and sports the only time for a job is during the summer, and I prefer they use that money for clothes, and other necessities. It also gives them a little spending money after school starts, which is nice.
Even though they have a fully insured car to drive we only give them a fixed amount of gas money. That basically gets them to/from school and activities. My daughter likes to drive and see her friends a lot more than my son ever did so she has had to use her own money to pay for the extra gas she uses.
And where we live I LOVE having them drive themselves, it's to MY advantage! The high school is a good twenty minutes each way so not driving them saves me almost an hour a day. It's totally worth it :)

My husband sells cars, so here is what I am thinking, if the child has a certain GPA, they get a discount on insurance, which we would pay, because it would be cheap.
If my kids dont have this GPA, they wont get a car. If they arent responsible enough to keep their grades up, they certainly arent responsible to drive a car at that age.
I know we will be getting a fantastic deal on the car that we get, so I do not think it would be so much to ask that they make payments to us for the car. If they miss a payment, they will not use the car again until they are paid up.
Easier said than done? Maybe, but thats my plan.

Been through this 2x.

1. We made them take the police-taught driver's ed training.
2. We offered them skid car training.
3. We did not buy them cars at 16. We allowed them use of OUR car. They paid for gas and tolls. They had to ask to use the car and it could not be assumed that they could just take it because they have a key.
4. We did not set them loose til WE were comfortable with them driving solo, no matter what the calendar or log book said. This length of time was different per kid.
5. We helped them out with insurance at first but then they had to get a job and pay for their share.
6. When they did receive a car (friend gave us a car that SS drove and SD drove briefly) they were responsible for the care and feeding and insurance on the car. SS did not receive a car til he was 18 and SD drove it after she turned 18 and had her own job. This was at the end of/after HS. If their grades had suffered in HS due to having a job, then we would have revisited the privileges (because driving is a privilege, not a right) that needed to be adjusted. The car remained in our names til it died.

SS was not keen on driving at first and we said that was fine, but we were no longer playing taxi after he was eligible to drive. We have a decent mass transit bus system here. We took him to/from school and to/from necessary events, but we didn't take him to friend's houses unless we were going that way. After a few months of waiting for the bus, he decided to learn.

SS was hard on the car. He messed up the bumper and the light. I think SD would have taken better care of it but she is a better driver overall, too.

I wasn't allowed to work as a teen - just some babysitting which didn't pay much. Our teen son worked summers (mowing lawns, taking care of pets and people's homes during their vacations) but we didn't want him to work during the school year. (He mowed a few lawns in late May through early October, but that was it.) So he had no choice when it came to a car - his grandmother stopped driving and gave him the car, and we paid for things. He had household chores and responsibilities but not an outside job because he was on the track team with practice every day, plus school work.

I think you and your husband have to figure out (when the time comes - you can't predict now) what's best for your kids. If they are in school activities they enjoy, and they have a lot of work, then it's very very difficult to add on an after-school job and still have them getting any sleep. If they are not into activities, then they can get a job. Either one is a good thing in terms of their "activity resume" that goes in with their college applications.

If they are working at SOMETHING then they will not be incredibly spoiled. The best thing you can do NOW is make sure they feel a part of the family and have something they need to do for the welfare of the family. Chores, family outings, a sense of frugality (not feeling that they deserve every treat and money grows on trees, or in ATMs!), and the ability to make choices about what they REALLY want and what they're willing to give up - these all help build character.

And kids will appreciate a car if you take away the keys every time they have a major infraction (break curfew, lie, whatever) - it's not something that's only taught through earning their own money.

Whatever you decide, you and your husband have to be on the same page. I think you will know more about your kids' interests when they are much older, but as I said, you can start now to build a sense of responsibility and to prevent a sense of entitlement.

I played 3 sports in high school, did chorus, a ton of other extracurriculars, had a 3.86 out of 4.0 GPA and worked 2 different jobs in high school (2 week nights a week I worked in the kitchen of a nursing home; Saturday and Sunday afternoons/evenings I worked at a steak house/bar.) During the summer I worked FT internships at my aunt and uncle's stock brokerage firm. I paid for all my gas, my clothes, and any fun (canoe trips, Six Flags road trip, camping, etc.) I used the family station wagon for my first 2 years with a driver's license, but when I was 18 I bought myself an 11 year old $1000 Volkswagon Jetta. The rest of my money I used to pay for a trip to Europe that I took with my aunt, cousin, and a pilgrimage group.

I drove old cars throughout college. Sometimes it was one I bought, other times it was one of my parents' cars. One year at college I didn't have a car and used public transportation for everything. I don't think there is a right answer to your question, and your plan doesn't have to be set in stone--do what you can for your kids when you can, but if they can do for themselves, even better.

Each family is different. Our daughter is 17 and her "work" is her school work, extracurriculars, and community service. We do not expect her to bring in money from a job outside of that other than the occasional babysitting she does when she is available. She is on my payroll (minimal $$ and it goes straight into her savings account) with our company for shadowing me a couple hours a week to learn the process of running a successful business, planning, forecasting, IRS reporting,etc.

I had a 2007 Mercedes CLK 350 in perfect condition, purchased and paid for... brand new for me. When we purchased this car, it was earmarked for her at 16. That is the car she got at 16 because it is a good, safe, reliable car still with less than 30,000 miles on it. We pay for gas and insurance.

She is very picky and protective of her car, LOVES it. Her first class at school is at 9am but she leaves by 7:15am to ensure she gets the particular parking spot she wants to keep this car in perfect condition, no door dings,etc.

Some kids can handle the responsibility and some can't. Our daughter is very responsible, driven and independent as well as a great student and Varsity cheer captain. Her goals are set above and beyond many students at this age.

Granted, she is not perfect as no one is and the only issue we had with her and the car was a speeding ticket. She was very upset, and it especially embarrassed and upset her because the law here is that you must go sit in front of a judge if you are under 17 and get a ticket. The officers know exactly when and where students come out of the lots and head home and they have speed traps. That is ok... I prefer her to now be very aware and learn from her mistake.

She drives a good 20 minutes each way to school at least one round trip a day. Most of the time there are 1-3 round trips with you count all the extra cheer practices, games, etc.

As for me, I was not as fortunate with supportive parents and I purchased my first car at 18 with money I made working 3 jobs through highschool not including the babysitting. I also paid my way through college and worked 2 jobs throughout college.

We will also be funding our daughter's college so that she will graduate debt free and get a good start in her career. We started saving for her college before she was born.

My household is the same as yours. I was given a reliable used car and my parents paid my insurance. I paid for gas. DH had to buy his own car and pay for his own insurance and gas. We each think our way is the best.

What I'd be willing to bet happens is that kid is responsible for gas and insurance. We'll either buy a good used car or split the cost depending on who caves in on that argument.

In my experience, I was very thankful for the car my parents gave me. They were very clear that it was the only one I was getting and if I crashed it, I was out of luck. I was also given the warning of 1 ticket and I'd lose my driving priviledges. Luckily, I never had to find out how serious they were on that because I was always cautious enough to not have to test it out.

I bought my first car when I was sixteen from my older sister. My parents paid half. I got a job and paid for my own gas and insurance. I will do the same for my kids. I expect that they will also have part time jobs in high school. Teens learn a lot of essential skills by working part time.

It's funny how much we look to what we got or didn't get as kids... My parents didn't buy me a car but at some point, we had an extra one I could use a lot. So I'm hoping our timing works out like that too. Instead of getting rid of an older car when we want to buy a new one, we let the kids use it. And maybe we buy a new one a year or two earlier than necessary to facilitate that. I think it depends too where you live so how necessary a car is and if the mom or dad is home to either drive the child around a lot or let them borrow the car. So basically how much the child really needs a car themselves. I believe that kids can be appreciative vs spoiled if they're bought a car or something btw. Working will depend on what else they're doing. If they're really involved in sports and all, then probably not. If they're sitting home watching TV, then yes, a PT job. I also feel like homework has gotten tougher. I hear of kids up until 11pm or midnight trying to get it all done and if that's the case, then no PT job. I would expect them to work during the summer though. So lots of variables... I also put paying for college way ahead of putting the money into buying them a car.

I bought my first car. My mom got a new one and sold me her old one. I had to make monthly notes to her just as I would to a finance company, and if I didn't make the note, I wasn't allowed to drive the car. I also had to pay for my gas and insurance.

My daughter used my car at first. She was not allowed to get a license until she had a job and she had to pay her part of the insurance and return my car with the same amount of gas it had when she took it out.
Her dad gave her an old beater when she was 17, and she still had to pay for insurance and gas.

Growing up my husband and I both had to pay for our car and parents paid insurance. Gas usually us but sometimes parents if needed. My H and I took the Dave Ramsey course and his philosophy is they earn money and then they pay for half of the car and the parent matches the other half up to a certain limit. Then there are no car payments and the child appreciates the car. My parents bought a car for both of my brothers when they became of age and neither took car of it. My 1st brother got an older model convertible mustang w small engine. in less than a year he had burned out the engine, destroyed the rims by driving on them with a flat, ripped a whole in the canvas top and a few other things. My other brother is now 22 and is on his 3rd car. Each one a different issue. I think they should at least pay for some. They could always work during the summer or babysit to earn money then however much they have saved up you match and whatever kind of car that buys that's what they get until they save up to trade in for a better one. But then no payments and they appreciate. You can still pay insurance to help with the burden and they pay gas.

Our oldest daughter was a straight A student in high school and VERY involved in sports and clubs. We bought her car for her 16th birthday because we did not want her to have to get a job in high school. We knew that her working would affect her grades and ability to stay in all the activities she was a part of. We also paid her insurance. It paid off for us. She has a full ride to college as a result. We will do the same for our younger two if they earn it.

Our son is almost 17. he makes great grades and is every sport. even in the summer he has his sports. he is a great kid. never gets in trouble. so we bought him a 2002 car. we pay for gas and insurance. We feel that him staying focused on school is better than getting a job and having extra time on his hands. we have watched some of his friends quit sports and get jobs (only part time) they have too much time on their hands and have made some poor choices. sports keep you in line.

My Husband and I felt our Kids job is high school was grades, sports and the extra curricular activities they were involved in. They each had an older vehicle to drive while in high school and we bought each of them a little newer vehicle when they were in college. The only trouble we have had is a college roommate totaled one car but his insurance paid so we weren't out any money on the replacement. Our kids all have taken very good care of their vehicles and know they can be taken away at anytime if we feel they are not being taken care of.

When we moved my grandmother to the nusing home 2 years ago, they decided to sell (we had requested) us her 1997 Chevy Malibu with 26,000 for $500. I made my son pay half because I didn't want him to feel he fully owned the vehicle.
He will be paying half his insurance when he gets another job. He drive himself and his sister to school everyday (bus is not an option). He generally picks her up from practices, etc. Because of this, I do give him $40/month for gas. I work full-time, my fiance works out of town and their dad lives out of state. For me, his help is essential.

My daughter will be 16 in 16 months (wow...hadn't realized it was that soon) and I'm not really sure what we'll do with her yet.

our oldest 2 daughters were both bought cars for their 16th birthdays. My husband and I wanted to do that for them, and honestly it helped me out since they could provide some of the rides that I was providing once they had cars, and it freed up some of my time since I still had 2 younger kids at home (both special needs kids) and also had health issues of my own, so I was quite busy with many appts each week. We did not buy NEW cars, they were used. Our girls had to get part time jobs to pay the difference in our auto insurance once we added the cars that we bought them. We actually kept the cars in our name until they graduated high school, and then transferred it to their name. (it was less expensive to insure them that way) They also paid for their own gas, and upkeep of the cars. They both appreciated their cars, and have never had an entitled attitude at all. They are both in college now, and the 19 yr old is there on almost full scholarships, so having her part time job did not hurt her as far as her grades and extra curricular activities went. The oldest, who is 22, was a wonderful student in high school as well, and her job did not cause any issues with her education either, however she chose to work for a few years prior to going to college full time since she was not really sure of what she wanted to go to school for. I also think that she was sticking close to home for a while to make sure that my health was ok since she was always the one who helped me out with her younger siblings. <3 Both of our girls have always taken very good care of their vehicles, and so far have not taken for granted the fact that we provided them their first cars. They realize that they were quite fortunate, because they have seen many of their friends trying desperatly to save money to purchase a car, or even to find a job so they can save for a car, and it has been difficult to do. I am hopeful that when the time comes, we are able to do the same thing for our younger 2 children as well. We have a while to go before we get to that particular hurdle.

Children need to learn early on the responsibilities of money. These are lessons that will help them navigate life. If they want to drive, they will have to work hard to save up to pay for their own. If parents keep paying for things, they will expect this throughout life.

Both my children saved all earned money cutting grass, working construction with grandpa, and when they were legally able to work, they both worked part-time after school and weekends (this did not affect school work or social activities.) They want it, they bought it. This mom has enough bills to pay.

My mean mom never signed for my driver’s licenses when I was 16 (she said I had two feet-so walk!) I illegally drove for 3 years. I worked hard to buy my first car, insurance and move out on my own at 17.

My thinking is I'll see how mature my son is by then. If he is then I'd be willing to help out with insurance and repairs etc. If not I'll tell him he has to work for it because he'd have to learn some maturity if he's going to hold down a job.
Reconsider wether or not they work. The older you get the harder it is to get (and suffer through) an entry level job. Without prior work experience under your belt it's hard to get a job at all.

If you want good grades and good students they can't work full time during the school year at all. Most of my LDS friends kids don't work except during the summer time and they save all their money for college and their missions. I think this is enough work for them.

They buy them cheap running vehicles and include the insurance on their own policies. They pay for gasoline to an extent then the kids can use their own money for the rest. They do get allowances.

If they are using a hundred dollars a week in gasoline there need to be boundaries. If they are using a hundred a month in gas then obviously they are being responsible.

Our boys had to save for their cars. We told them we would match up to a certain amount if they achieved Eagle Scout, which they both did. They had to pay part of the insurance and for their own gas. They both worked part time jobs through high school.
The oldest did not work during his freshman year in college. But we are not paying all college expenses so he has a part time job now.
The youngest just started college. He is in a very demanding program and puts in 12 hours per day 5 days a week. We don't expect him to work. But he is trying to go ahead and get an unpaid internship. I agree with Jo. Working does not hurt them. Less free time to get in trouble!
I worked all the way through a very demanding engineering program and still had a great GPA.

I think it depends on the child and what your lives are like once the time comes.

When i was in school, my mother needed me to be able to drive, because she was working full time and my sister needed to be driven places.

I also was able to hold down a part time job and also be able to be involved in school events and activities.

I paid for half of the car and all of the gas. My mom paid the insurance.

When my husband was in high school, he had use of a truck that his family owned, he also had a part time job..

But for our daughter, with all of the accelerated classes and activities she was involved in, there was no way for her to a have a part time job. instead she took on work when she could. I also was not working full time, so I could drive her and pick her up. There was not a need for an extra car for her.

When it came time for her to go to college, she was almost 3000 miles away and her college did not really need a car to get around..And so this dropped the cost of her insurance. So she still does not have her own car. We have a truck, a car and my husband rides a scooter or bike to work.. She is still not sure where she is going to end up working and living. So we just use the vehicle we need for that day. If she drives the car she puts gas in it.

So just like any parenting decisions, you can talk about it, you can make plans, but until you are at that point, there is no one answer. It will be dependent on what is actually going on at that point in your child's development and what the needs for the family are at that point.

How are they going to pay for gas and insurance if you don't want them to work? Do they really get that much for birthdays/christmas? Have you looked at the cost of insurance for 16 year olds?

It sounds like you want to raise your kids to be "entitled". Entitled to a car you buy; entitled to money you'll provide because you don't want them to work. You even put extracurricular sports before work.

With that kind of background, they will NOT appreciate a car if you pay for the entire thing. They need to get part time jobs and pay for half the car and then half the insurance and all the gas.

I didn't want my son to work through high school either, but things didn't work out that way. I did buy him his first car, which was a $600 94 Ford Explorer (this was 2 years ago), but he was completely responsible for gas and insurance. I paid for my own car at 16 w/ gas and insurance it created responsibility in me, so I didn't really want to just hand him things either. His half brother had a truck completely given to him, had his gas and everything paid for and guess what..he is almost 20 driving the same vehicle and hasn't worked more than a TOTAL of 6 months since he turned 16. My son (17.5years) has sold his Explorer and financed a 2000 Camaro, which he is completely financially responsible for. I DO help with unexpected repairs that have come up. I do not pay for them, but I put something towards them. Preventative maintenance (oil change, tires, etc) are all his. It's about responsibility and taking pride in being responsible for yourself. I know so many people in their 20s that are still being called "kids" and still waiting for the next "handout". There's really no reason they can't at least work a weekend job...what else will they be doing partying?? My son plays competitive soccer, attends school, and works approx 25 hrs a week at Kohls & cleans an office for couple hours on the weekend and still has PLENTY of social time. Fortunately you have a while to have to make the final decision. You can raise them to believe you are going to have to pay their car, etc. and IF you choose to do different it will be a surprise & NOT expected as a handout or greed.

To the one that gave their child an '07 Mercedes, that's better than most of the people I know drive...LOL Glad life has been good to you :)