16 mo-Used To Nurse to Nap but Has Weaned Himself....

Updated on December 27, 2008
R.B. asks from Milford, NH
5 answers

My son is not the greatest napper. He always pushes to play through his sleepy signs, and used to be I could get him to calm down enough by nursing that he would fall to sleep (most of the time). Now he is self weaning and isn't interested in daytime nursing so has been fighting the nap time. Around 12:30 he'll yawn a couple of times and sometimes even nurse for a few minutes or sit in my lap and watch a cartoon and get kinda spacey (for maybe 15) but then he'll jump up and start playing again. We have recently skipped naps altogether a few times and gone to bed around 6:30-7 and he'll sleep till 8am straight through. I know he's too young to go without a nap because when he does nap he's down for ~2hours and still is in bed by 8pm and sleeps till morning,7 or 8. I don't know what to do to get him to nap. Sometimes I take him for a drive and he'll be out in less than 5 minutes and I carry him in the house asleep but this is NOT a habit I want to get into. Please help me. Without his naps I am exhausted by 8pm too and nothing has gotten done around the house.

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R.H.

answers from Boston on

R., you've probably already tried this but... how about a big warm bottle given to him in a quiet dark room (rocking chair is a bonus) followed by a quick snuggle/burp and then into the crib. Maybe after several days of doing this around the same time (1pm-ish?) it will become routine for him. I don't know what it's like to have a 16 mo old but this is what we do with our 10 mo old. She doesn't really have a choice in the matter since my sanity is directly related to whether or not she has good naps... don't feel bad about it, he needs it and so do you!

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L.D.

answers from Burlington on

has your son ever used a pacifier? you mentioned he used to nurse to get himself to sleep..it sounds like he needs something as a replacement to soothe himself...what about a special stuffed animal? Or have him sit and watch cartoons in the car seat instead of on your lap..?

We had to do the whole thing with going for a drive and carrying a sleeping baby inside, and we were on the 3rd floor in an apt. building!

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R.K.

answers from Springfield on

I found that every child grows out of naps at different ages. My oldest is 7 and will still come home and take a nap after school my little guy is 20 months old and hasn't napped since sept. I feel for you I am exhausted by the time he goes to bed and rarely have energy to get house work done. I've been trying to do it during the day. We use an all natural cleaner so I let him "help" me clean during the day plus some of the new toys we got for Christmas seem to hold his attention long enough to allow me to get a few things done without him tagging right behind me.

D.B.

answers from Boston on

Can you put him in his crib with a darkened room (room darkening blinds aren't too expensive if you shop around) - or you can add room-darkening lining (available at fabric stores) to existing shades/curtains. My son enjoyed a white noise machine and some soft lullabies to begin with. The white noise machine kept out the street/house noises. Tell him it's quiet time, put him in his crib, and maybe put a few soft toys in there. Maybe he will fall asleep. But he definitely needs the down time - so do you! - so resist the urge to go get him. You are right that you can't depend on nursing or car rides - once you stop and try to put him down, he wakes up. Probably he needs to practice self-calming. At preschools/day care, the kids all have to lie down on a mat - they don't require them to sleep, but it's definitely quiet time. Maybe they get a book but they have to stay on their mats. 90% of them fall asleep.

My son napped for 3 hours well past his 4th birthday - he was very active in the morning and he definitely needed it. In fact, I didn't start him in kindergarten at age 5 because it would have been afternoon session - there's no way he would have been able to handle it because he really had only given up the nap 6 months before. Holding him out until 6 (and then a morning session) was the best decision we ever made. Anything you can do to establish a firm naptime/quiet time now will help you - and him - for some years to come!

Good luck!

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M.F.

answers from Pittsfield on

I have found that if we follow the same routine for nap as we do for bedtime my kids (and my daycare kids) always napped. Turn the TV off, lights out, pull the shades, put your child in the same place for nap every day (I put a mat & blanket on the livingroom floor), get a favorite stuffed toy and tell him its time to sleep. You may have to follow this routine for a couple weeks before he "gets it". Stay firm and don't let him get off the mat. If you have to...sit right next to him and rub/pat his back.

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