15 Month Old Bashes Head into Walls/floors

Updated on June 27, 2007
J.H. asks from Stockton, CA
9 answers

Is there anyone else that has the same problem, My son gets upset or cranky and falls down on floor and hits head on floor a few times or will find a wall and bash his head on that a few times.He will cry when it hurts but still does it. He stops him tantrum when you pick him up, and thats what I think it is just an attention getter. I read on the email updates we get about the different stages (pregnancy thru toddler) and it says this may be normal up to age 4. I have two older girls so Im not used to this behavior. Does anyone else have or had this problem with their boy?

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B.

answers from Las Vegas on

I think when there is extreme behavior like this it warrants an evaluation by early intervention specialists. The wording "may be normal up the 4" is ridiculous. Head banging is a sign of extreme frustration or pain. If you are in Nevada, call Nevada Early Intervention Services (NEIS). It's free and if he's OK great! If he has a diagnosis such as developmental delay, PDD, or autism then the earlier the diagnosis the better. Intense early intervention is vital for kids with any developmental disability. You are obviously concerned or you wouldn't have asked for advice. ALways listen to your Mom intuition, it will never fail you. Never, ever take the advice of "let's take a wait and see approach" that so many physicians are giving. If you are concerned, keep taking him to experts until someone listens and evaluates him. My daugher was diagnosed with autism at age 3 1/2. I knew something was wrong but I didn't know what. After being misdiagnosed several times she finally got the intervention she needed. But we lost a good year and a half. What I wouldn't give to have that time back. She is now almost indistinguishable from her peers. We are hoping for a complete loss of the autism diagnosis. It is possible for some children with autism to "recover" (loss of the diagnosis completely). But it takes a lot of work and the sooner the better. I'm not saying he has autism but it's worth getting him evaluated. Good luck and I sincerely hope it's nothing.

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G.F.

answers from San Francisco on

Dear J.,
My daughter did the same thing at around 20 months of age. She would hit her head against a wall whenever she was upset. It was the strangest thing I had ever seen and really freaked me out! At first I yelled for her to stop, which was the wrong approach. I was reacting on my own fear and she got a kick out of the attention. I think she would have stopped sooner had I just ignored it from the beginning. It lasted about a month and a half if I recall correctly ( she's 4 now). No magic, just simply ignoring it and the phase thankfully passed. It started after my second daughter was born...not sure if that had anything to do with it. Anyway hope this helps.

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K.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

Hi,

I too have a 16 month old son who does the same thing to a point. My Dr says it is normal and to not give him attention so he well figure out that it doesn't work. I have a 9yr old son whom never did that so I to asked my Dr if it was normal for him to get mad and hit his head on walls and floors. I hate it when he does that because we have tile and wood floors through out our house. But, he is starting to realize that it hurts and we aren't going to give into him. So don't fill alone I have one too.
K.

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D.G.

answers from Stockton on

i had read somewhere that if the father or mother did head banging then the child will mostlikely fallow. my hubby did that as a toddler and my daughter was doing it for a few months but thankfully she stopped on her own, i guess that she finally realized that it hurts. good luck

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M.L.

answers from Las Vegas on

My almost 17 month old started throwing him self on the floor a couple months ago and recently starting hitting his head on things...he does it really lightly or tries to anyway...i sometimes just ignore what he did unless he does it really hard and he usually stops within a minute or two. One thing that helped his frustration alot when he was really young my babysitter and my family taught him a little baby sign language...it is great when he is tired instead of just throwing a tantrum he comes up to me and show me the sign for nap...and the same if he is hungry...but now he just says more. It helps till they can completly form all their words...I mean he talks just sometimes it's easier when he points for him.

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T.F.

answers from Los Angeles on

Well, I have a 15 month old girl that does this when she is upset and frustrated. She will just throw herself on the floor and throw her head back on the ground. While it is normal for this age because they can't speak yet, so they don't know how to express their frustrations, I would not just ignore it. I would see what happens before the tantrum and try to dissolve the problem before the meltdown. Its not like they are doing this out of thin air. There IS a need that is not being met. Find out what he needs and do your best to give him what he needs- maybe its nap time, he's hungry, or frustrated.
My baby girl will melt down when I have to take something out of her hand that's dangerous. I just talk to her and give her the words to name her feelings, "You are very angry and upset that I took that from you." "You are really mad right now because you wanted that" "That is not for Annie". And I would always try to hold my child if she would let me or move her to distract her with something else.
Here is a thought provoking article on tantrums;

http://www.mothering.com/articles/growing_child/toddlers/...

If you scroll down it gives some great guidelines as to what to do during a tantrum. Interesting stuff!

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K.L.

answers from San Francisco on

(Im a child psychologist, and mommy too)

This behavior is completely normal at this point in his life. Until he has enough skills in language to verbally express anger, frustration, or any other extreme emotion, he will continue to act physically in some way to overwhelming feelings ---- and at this age, a great deal of his emotions ARE overwhelming to him.
Ignore the head butting, and try to reduce those situations that are stressful and you know are a trigger for his head butting. This may not work as 15 month olds throw tantrums for what seem like the smallest little things: the best bet is to ignore the behavior, as he is doing it for attention. But dont worry! LOTS of kids do this, and it is absolutely NOT a situation where you should have him evaluated by a specialist - its totally normal and even rather appropriate for the age that he is now. It is in no way an indicator that anything is wrong with him. There are situations where children, and even compromised adults, will engage in this behavior to the point where they are knocking themselves unconcious, or causing themselves to bleed, break bones, and other more serious injuries from head banging - THAT is a problem, and an indicator of mental illness. Your son banging his head on the floor, bed, wall, whatever, is not in any way like the head banging that is considered unusual or harmful in other cases, so dont worry. It'll pass, its just one of those phases. My daughter, who is 18 months old, will throw herself face first onto whatever surface she is standing on to have a temper tantrum - and I know it hurts her - but you have to let them do it until they grow out of it. No worries!

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L.W.

answers from Las Vegas on

My little boy did this at about this age. He was doing it for attention and/or out of frustration. He stopped after about 3 months of doing it. I was told by the pediatrician to ignore it as long as he wasn't doing it on really hard floor or concrete. I know it's hard to see your baby doing this, but just let it go. Our pediatrician said that if you pay more attention to it he'll do it more. Don't stress and it will stop.

L.

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