14 Month Old Won't Nap

Updated on November 10, 2008
C.L. asks from San Francisco, CA
16 answers

I think my 14 month old is having trouble napping or maybe I'm not putting him down at the right time for a nap.

He wakes up at around 7am and since I've cut back on the morning nap, he now takes an afternoon nap at 1pm. I'm lucky if he actually falls asleep at that nap time. Unfortunately we have found out that if we are out and about, anywhere between 11am and close to 1pm, he will fall asleep in the car. When that happens and when we get home, we keep him awake and put him down for nap at 1pm. Unfortunately when that happens, he won't nap. What am I doing wrong??

Yesterday because of it, he fell asleep in the car at 5pm because we were out and because he didn't really nap at all. So now I'm starting to worry and wonder what I should do.

We really have always put him on a schedule and would like to keep to one but it's so difficult. I'm hoping someone can provide some insight. By the way, bedtime for him is 8pm.

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So What Happened?

Well the first 3 days to the chance, he did actually well. Then it started going downhill after that. I am still struggling to this day and don't know what to do anymore. I've moved his naps from 1pm to either 10am or 11am and some days he'll sleep and other days he won't. I've tried going back to two naps a day and some days he'll sleep and other days he won't. When it comes to bedtime, he'll cry for at least 30 minutes and will only stop when held. There was even a point where he'd sleep if he's being held and a habit I don't want to form. So now all I do is pray that he'll take a nap each day. He's so unpredictable and I understand that comes with it, I just wish he'd nap. It has gotten to the point where I am just so frustrated at times that I feel hopeless and useless. Thanks to everyone that tried to help. I really appreciate the advice that I've gotten. Now I'm just waiting...

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E.W.

answers from Sacramento on

Sounds like he might be over-tired since he has just begun to outgrow his morning nap. My 20-month old son was in the same situation. Perhaps try getting him to bed a bit earlier (around 7 or 7:30PM) and then putting him down for a nap around 11AM. Then, try lunch around 1:30PM when he wakes up and dinner at 5:30PM, bath right after, then storytime and bed. Good luck!

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J.W.

answers from Salinas on

I might try a bit earlier- 11:30 or 12- thats a long span for him to go awake at his age. My 2.5 yr old wakes at seven and goes down around 1 but sometimes its earlier and hes a good bit older. If they get over tired or miss the window its impossile. watch for yawns and eye rubbing... good luck

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K.C.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi C.,

I agree with most moms who have replied. Sounds like your little guy is over-tired. You may have to adjust your running around for a while (at least a week) to put him on a good and consistent schedule. Try doing the running around before and/or after his nap.

If he's completely outgrown two naps, then try putting him down for an earlier nap ~ around 11:30 or 12pm. Otherwise, try going back to two naps ~9am and 1pm. Also, try moving his bedtime earlier. 7 or 7:30 the latest.
It may be harder for you than it is for him to adjust your daily schedule - but it's worth it b/c you'll end up with a happy and well rested baby! You'll be happier too! :O)

My son is 14 months old too. Still takes two naps - @ 9am (and sleeps for two hours) and at 2pm (sleeps for 1 hour). If I wait too long to put him down for a nap, be becomes overtired and the nap is missed. Not good. He wakes up in the morning between 6-6:30 and goes to sleep for the night between 6:30-7pm.

Remember; Sleep begets sleep!

Good luck!

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A.R.

answers from San Francisco on

I read a book about natural times for kids to nap, which said 9 am and 1 pm. Our 14 month old wakes between 6-7 am and goes down between 9 - 10 am for his morning nap and between 1:00-2:30 for afternoon nap; depending on how much he sleeps for the am nap. If he has 1 1/1 hours in the am, he may sleep much less in afternoon but still wants two naps a day. He heads to bed at night anywhere between 6:30-8:00 pm.

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M.T.

answers from Bakersfield on

Go with your gut. He sounds like he still needs two naps a day. It is so hard to figure out when he is going through so many changes developmentally anyway, so the napping part can be a challenge. First, I want to highly recommend the book Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Dr. Marc Weissbluth. It clearly lays out the basics of infant sleep patterns and then also gives suggestions and testimonials by parents going through similar sleep issues at different stages. A friend recommended it to me and it has made the biggest difference in helping me understand and offer suggestions that work. Kids need sleep. Granted, the transition from two naps a day to one may vary from child to child, but most kids transition around 18 months of age. My son napped twice a day (9am and 2pm) until around his 17th month and now naps from about 1-3:30 or even four each day and going to sleep between 6:30pm and 7pm has never been a problem. I remember having to juggle life around the two nap a day schedule so I know how hard that is. And my son would fall asleep in the carseat too if it was close to his am nap time. And he would never just continue napping in his crib after being carried inside. I honestly tried very hard to get home in time for the naps, but the am nap got delayed about once or twice a week. So, I would suggest trying to go back to two naps a day and be consistent and firm with the start time so he understands. I noticed my son was ready for one afternoon nap a day when he started babbling during his am nap time and this went on for about two weeks or so. I would leave him in his crib and he never cried, but he was clearly just not needing a nap at that time. I wouldn't push his going to one nap a day right now, it does sound like he needs two still. Also, I would put him to bed earlier and I don't mean just trying it once and thinking it doesn't work if he doesn't go right to sleep. I would try to bump up bedtime by about 15 minutes each night until he is in bed between 6:30 and 7pm. It will take some time, but I think he might be overtired and will do much better with more sleep contrary to what some think. Try to get a copy of the book and be patient in getting your son back on a schedule. It will be so much easier to do it now rather than after the baby is born. All the best to you and your new little one on the way too!

1 mom found this helpful
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C.A.

answers from San Francisco on

My daughter is 16 months and just switched to 1 nap a day last month. She wakes up between 7:30 and 8:00 most mornings and is down for her nap at 11:30. She normally naps until 12:45 - 2, then goes to bed anywhere from 6:30-7:30 depending on how she napped and how tired she looks and is acting. It sounds to me like your son is not getting enough sleep. It's really hard to plan our day with a huge chunk of the day cut out, but I feel like it has to be done to have a happy baby (grouchy baby makes a grouchy mommy in this house). I didn't read Love's advice, but all the sleep advice she has give me has been right on target. She knows what shes talking about.
Best of luck!
C.
PS. If my daughter falls asleep in the car that's her nap, she does not stay asleep or fall back asleep if I take her out of the car and put her in her crib.

1 mom found this helpful
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L.R.

answers from Sacramento on

Hi C.,
I HIGHLY recommend Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Dr. Marc Weissbluth for age appropriate sleep needs and schedules. Two things I would do ASAP is move is bedtime much earlier to 6-6:30pm and try napping him around 12pm. You may even find that after going to bed earlier for a while he may be able to go until 1pm before napping. The reason he isn't able to fall asleep is because he is over tired. He should be getting around 12 hours of sleep at night with a 1-2 hour nap during the day. My 3 yr old daughter goes to bed around 6:30pm and wakes between 6:30-7am. She doesn't nap anymore but has an hour of "quiet" time each day but when she was 14 months old she slept 12 hrs+ at night and napped 1-1 1/2 hrs around 12pm. Email me if you want more info.
Sincerely,
L.

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B.S.

answers from Sacramento on

My kids (4 and 2) wake up about 7am, nap from 12-2:30pm, and go to bed about 8:30pm. I think your son may be overly tired by 1pm and having trouble getting to sleep because of that. Also, if he falls asleep between 11 and 1, I wouldn't wake him to try to put him back down at 1pm. He is showing you he is tired, so you should probably let him continue sleeping, rather than interrupting the sleep he is getting, only to not have him sleep at all later.

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T.H.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi C.,

It really requires a lot of work to adjust them to a new nap schedule. I think for the time being you are going to need to be home for his naps and start putting him down at the same time everyday. Mine needs a routine so we play, eat lunch, wash up, drink water, and lay down. If you are consistent just like anything else they will evenually follow. I don't think you are doing anything "wrong" but if you know he may fall asleep in the car either don't go (wait until he's up) or make sure whatever you are doing he can stay sleeping.

Oh, BTW, I don't think 1 is too late for the nap if he wakes at 7:00.

Good luck to you C.!

T.

p.s.
Love R. always has great sleep posts, you should check out her posts. :)

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L.C.

answers from San Francisco on

I think you are putting him down for nap too late in the day. Six hours is a long time for a 14 month old to go. My 2 year old goes for almost 6 hours but at 14 months I think she would go for more like 3 hours. You need to look for signs of him being tired and put him down around that time. I also know that my daughter will sometimes NOT nap on days that we run too late for nap, probably because she is overtired.

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R.J.

answers from San Francisco on

My daughter wakes up at 7am, she is down for a nap at 1130a and generally sleeps til 130p-200p, and she is two years old. I have found that if we are out and about and running late for her nap she will not sleep and if she does it is for 1/2 hour tops - once she gets overtired getting her down can be impossible. I would try putting yoru son down earlier, if he is getting over tired he likely won't sleep, this is what I have learned through reading lots of books and also through experience with my daughter .. good luck!

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D.M.

answers from San Francisco on

Different babies need different amounts of sleep. Our third child that just turned 2 gave up his morning nap a long time ago. I don't remember exactly, but I think it was about 15mo. This is unusually early, but he seems to not need as much sleep as most babies. (He wakes at 8:00, has a 1 hour nap around 1:30, then doesn't go down for the night until 9:30 or later. But he is usually very cheerful, even with so little sleep.) So you really do have to read your son's cues.

We did have the same issue with the car/stroller when he was transitioning from two naps to one. He usually didn't stay asleep for the transfer to the crib. And then he would be messed up and not be able to fall asleep again until late afternoon, and then would not fall asleep for the night until really late (like after 11:00.) I tried to plan things so that I would not be in the car for more than a few minutes, unless he could sleep for at least an hour in the car. I've eaten lunch, read books and worked on a laptop sitting in the car while parked, sometimes in our garage. There have even been a few times when I moved the babymonitor to the garage so he could continue to sleep in the car while I did chores in the house.

Try to be flexible and creative, and you will find ways to work it out...

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G.R.

answers from Sacramento on

In my opinion, your 14 month old is not getting enough sleep. Every person is different, but my 18 month old would be having daily meltdowns on that schedule.

At 14 mos, what worked for us, was 2 naps (9:30-11, 1:30-3) and bedtime around 6:30. On this schedule, he wakes up between 6:30 and 7AM most days. If you can't do 2 naps, try moving his one nap to 11:30 or 12, and give the earlier bedtime a try. It might really improve life.

But even so, he might still fall asleep in the car and mess up the schedule.

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M.F.

answers from Stockton on

If he is waking up at 7, a one o'clock nap time might be too late for him. Try putting him down for a nap earlier. I like putting my girls to nap at noon right after our 11:30 lunch. It is hard to be home during that time, but we do our running around when they get up in the morning and finish what needs to be done after they wake up.

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S.G.

answers from San Francisco on

I am really curious to see what people have to say because I am having the exact same problem with my 16 month old! It's driving me nuts!!!! I don't know what I'm doing wrong, but I can't take it when she doesn't nap. Keep me posted. Sorry I have no solutions for you...

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C.F.

answers from San Francisco on

i would pull the nap in as well. and the bedtime too by 30 or 60 mins. good luck!

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