13 Yr Old Crying to Much?

My first thought is hormones, but the screaming makes me believe there may be a little more going on.

I would take her in to the PED. She may need to be evaluated for depression.

Best wishes.

I'm a 7th grade teacher so I work with 13 year old girls all day. While I agree with other posters who say the hormones are in overdrive right now, I would say that a girl who cries over the things like ice cream and carnival rides and screams everyday is not typical. It's also not something that you or the rest of your family deserve or should have to put up with. Attitude and moodiness are normal, but what you've described is a much bigger deal. I would first talk with her pediatrician to get some guidance. Then I would talk with her teachers. Does she act like this at school? If so, she will quickly develop big problems socially. Perhaps the school counselors can give you some tips. Just right off the bat, my first instinct would be to tell you that she only acts this way because she gets something out of it- perhaps attention? Maybe by acting this way she gets exactly what she wants? These are things to discuss with a pediatrician to see if something else is going on. Good luck!

At 13, her hormones are in overdrive, and she basically has a perpetual case of PMS. It will pass.

Has she gotten her period yet. My daughter used to cry a lot before she got her period. If she has not gotten it yet, bet it will be real soon.

I can't even imagine a 13-year-old girl crying. Maybe if a pet died or something horrible. But over ice cream or rides...no that sounds abnormal.

It doesn't sound normal to me.
Take her to a Dr for a physical.
If she's manic depressive or has some sort of hormonal imbalance, the sooner she gets some help the better.

I was thinking the same as Patty. Sounds hormonal. I get teary right before my cycle each month. Drives me crazy because I will cry at some small sappy thing that normally wouldn't get to me and it is embarrassing. If she hasn't gotten her period, it is probably right around the corner.

Get her a journal and encourage her to write in it each day. What happened, how she felt, things that made her happy or sad, etc. Adding drawings or pictures is fun too. Journaling is a good way for kids to express themselves. Just make sure everyone in the family understands that it is her private journal and no one else is allowed to read it.

Yes, eventually it will pass over. Let her cry. If she screams, make her scream in her room. Enjoy the teen years! (not)

Many below think this isn't normal, but I've seen way too many girls be emotional nutcases during their teen years, and then mature out of it (at 18 or 20), to think this is all that unusual.

Hormones. Hormones are so completely out of whack at this age that the girls just haven't figured out the ride of emotions and how to handle them. My eldest daughter is nearly 13 years old, and since she started her period nearly two years ago it's a roller coaster of emotions at times just like what you're describing.

We HAVE noticed that when there are other issues bothering her that everything else becomes magnified. If she's upset with a friend then the entire world is against and the apocalypse is coming, and she's like an exposed nerve. I have to sit with her and figure out what's going on and ask her if she'd like help with her problem once I get it out of her. Once her problem is discussed and/or she resolves it herself, she's much more back to herself.

My best suggestion is to talk to her one on one. I doubt she enjoys this. She sounds miserable. Try to empathize with her. Get her to talk to you. If it turns out that she's generally upset and there isn't one thing or a couple of things bothering her, I would highly suggest family counseling.

In our case, though, we had the added delight of ADHD. When she takes her Concerta, it does help her mood swings and focus and stabilizes her quite a bit. It's not a magic pill, of course... just a tool in our box that helps her maintain control.

Has she always been like this or has it just started? I could ask this exact same question about my just turned 9 year old daughter. She cries about everything. I kind of think that she does it just to get her way (which she doesn't). But then I worry that maybe she does have some emotional problems and maybe we should take her to a doctor about it. My daughter has been like this since she was little and we always just thought she would outgrow it, but she hasn't yet. Good luck to you!

I agree that it's hormones and I also think yoga might help her develop some calming techniques. But I also think she is being overly dramatic, possibly for attention. I would warn her ahead of time that if she can't control her emotions, she may not be invited on the next outing. If she doesn't control herself, leave her home the next time. ONce she realizes that she's going to be left behind, she might make an effort at self-control.

HOWEVER, the screaming MUST STOP now! I understand she may not be able to control the tears, but she sure as heck can control the screaming. That I would not allow.

If she needs to scream, she MUST go to her room and scream into her pillow. Period. Anything else, and there would be a consequence. She has the right to her feelings, and it is good to get it out, BUT she does NOT have the right to disturb the peace of the house.

Hahaha, I'm laughing because my mom probably could have written this post when I was 13. It took a year or so for my hormones to balance out, and then things got much better. It was very frustrating for everyone (including me) in the meantime though.

That doesn't mean you can't do anything. At home especially I would tell her that when she's going to cry, she should go to her room until she can pull herself together. Not as a punishment, but because it's hard to get under control with an audience.

Is she intersted in yoga, or anything like that? She might do well to learn some deep breathing, calming techniques. She's also probably quite frustrated that she can't control her emotions, and something like this might help her.

It's a tough age. Sometimes moving into a new grade level is stressful, often when several elementary or upper level elem schools merge into a middle school. She's starting to grow up, socially intellectually and physically, and some of that may be exciting but the rest of it is scary. Hormones are kicking in, the body's changing, the moods are a mess, and she may even be scared by some of it. It's normal to cling to childhood and childlike behaviors, and it's also normal to lack the vocabulary for adolescent feelings and sensations and fears.

I'd say she needs to find a better outlet than crying, and she needs to deal with disappointment for things like carnival rides and zip lines. She might also benefit from talking to an objective person such as a counselor, to give voice to the fears and frustrations. It's really hard to know if she's got an anxiety disorder going on, but if she does, it's easier to treat it sooner rather than later.

I also work with a lot of teens and young women who have hormonal issues going on, and they can often be stabilized through effective supplementation for better energy and focus, mood swings, increased immunity and resistance (so they don't get sick on top of everything else - that's worse when there's stress), fewer rages, and fewer menstrual/PMS type issues. An awful lot can be done on the nutrient front.