13 Month Old Fell Downstairs--seems to Be Okay, Mom's Worried

My almost 3 year old fell down the stairs last week. She is OK but lost one of her front teeth. We also went to the ER and everything seems to be fine other than the tooth. We have been devistated but are starting to except the new smile. My daughter is also adjusting to her new gap. I dont think that you earn the worst mommy award since we have about another 4 years to look at the consequences of her fall. I think that we all just need to except that kids fall and that we can't be everywhere all of time. My grandmother just told me that this is what being a mom is all about....being there through the scary times and still holding together. I am amazed to learn about how many other little ones have had similar scares.

I have had my first son fall down the stairs 2 times in one week when he was about that age. As long as he is acting normal he is fine

S., First of all don't blame yourself we have all been through many kid accidents. Our son who is now 13 fell off a 3 ft table in a store after getting his pictures taken. He was about a year old at the time. I was getting the rest of his clothes and my husband was supposed to be watching him when he rolled off the table and onto a concrete floor that had thin carpeting. They called the paramedics took him to the hospital for a ct scan. How embarrassing to go by ambulance to a hospital when we could have prevented the whole thing. By the way my husband is a Fireman/EMT! Needless to say our son was fine. It certainly hasn’t been the last of hospital visits with our children. So don’t feel bad, we all have our moments and children at this age are very resilient.

Hi S.,
Welcome to motherhood!! I'm no expert but have had the same type of thing happen. If there was something internally wrong, he would not be acting fine. If you have made it throught the first 48 hours without sign of a concussion and have already done a CT scan, chances are he's going to be fine. Kids are tough and God built them to bounce back from stuff like that.
Wouldn't it be nice if all of us stay at home mom's could just be stay at home MOMS? We are responsible for EVERYTHING house related since we are home all day JUST taking care of the kids. Unless you have a maid and a grocery shopping service and a laundry service and a daily accountant and a personal assistant, you can not be next to him every second of the day. And if you were, how boring that would be for him as he starts to explore his surroundings. Life happens....and you have the take the good with the bad.
It can be hard, but let the guilt go! Good luck!

PLEASE! I see from all of the responses that you and I are not alone. We all have these little spills with our kids and wonder if we are the worst mommys ever! It sounds like he checked out just fine with the paramedics and you made all of the right calls. Let's talk about the award for most loving and caring! I have a 12, 9 and 4 year old and let me tell you, the little spills they had when they were young were nothing compared to what we will face in the teen years! On a daily basis I feel like the worst mom ever to my pre-teen. Hold on tight and enjoy the ride!

Man, things like that just scare the "bleep" out of ya. My youngest, who is now 2, liked to go UP the steps. He still does. There have been a few times where he has made it pretty far, and then didn't know what to do and ended falling back down. It just rips your heart out, they are sooo fast. Things are going to happen, you can't be there every second. My second son, when he was about 18 months old, pulled a book case on top of himself, got a HUGE gash in his head, and you know how they bleed. I was right there, but it just happened so fast. Man, blood EVERYWHERE. I was soooo freaking. I got him to the ER and I could barely stop crying long enough to explain what happened....man, not a good time. But, he is fine, has a nice "war wound" on his forehead. I was 7 months pregnant when that happened.....sigh, the memories. LOL

Anyway, you are not a horrible Mom, things are going to happen. The kids forget LONG before the parents do, that is for sure. If the docs said that he is ok, then I am sure he is.

BTW, good for your daughter. She seems like a bright girl to think to do that. Her little brother is lucky to have such a good big sister. Tell her good job for me.

K.

S. M.
You are not the worlds worst Mom. Accidents happen. We have 4 kids & all of them have had bumps & bruises from falling from time to time. Thank God for no broken bones yet. Our middle daughter loves to climb the tree out back ever since her cousin taught her how. I never wanted them to try climbing trees. Our only boy is a little daredevil too. So many knots on his head from things!! Trust what the Dr. says that he will be O.K. Tell the big sister good job breaking his fall!!
L. W. a SAHM of 4 Part-time babysitter

Don't beat yourself up! Accidents are going to happen with an active toddler ALL THE TIME. Obviously this one was extreme. All you can do is try to explain to your 8 year old how important it is to keep the gate closed to prevent injuries on the stairs and child-proof your home as best you can. Toddlers are into everything and you cannot be there every second. You also can't keep them in a pack-n-play or they won't learn by exploration... I'm surprised the pack-n-play is still even an option for you. Our son wouldn't go in there anymore shortly after he learned to walk at 9.5 months. It's a very hard period for parents... Your next year will be full of bruises and scrapes : ) Toddlers are super-resilient. Don't worry. It sounds like your son is completely fine & that you're more shaken up by the whole thing than he is : )

I am sure your son will be fine. Accidents do happen to ALL of us as hard as we try to prevent them. That's why they are called ACCIDENTS! This is not the first time a parent said to themselves, "I wish I had......" or " If only I had....." We are human beings, we make mistakes and things sometimes just happen. Children are children. Just thank God every day for the blessings and joy your children and family bring to you. Forgiveness is a blessing. Forgive yourself as you will forgive others. No one is perfect!

Oh My Gosh - First off - forgive yourself quickly & move on...... Parenting could be full time guilt if you let it. Accidents happen & sometimes they happen more often than not. We have three kids 5 & under & so far two of them have landed in ER before the ripe ole age of 3. Thank goodness we have such a wonderful medical system to check them out & make sure they are okay! You did everything right! Kids are so resilent - it's amazing to me how quickly they recover from just about everything. Don't spend another moment beating yourself up - your human.

Um, well I guess I could get the worst Mommy award if you were handing it out for falls. I was just bringing in a bag from the car the other day, passed my 4 year old daughter on the deck (she was standing nicely talking to the dog), went inside and heard the scream of a lifetime. She was on the ground, 5 ft down and her face banged up from a rock. Everything was moving fine. Nothing swelled too bad. All motor activities were coordinated...so we have gone on.

No ER, No 911 and I just gave her topical arnica and calendula for her arm/face. Yep, I probably under-reacted, but all seems well 3 days later and I bet she wont' try hanging over the rail anymore. She is my dare devil and was bound to get hurt sometime...I'm just glad it wasn't a fall from the 12 foot equipment at the playground I caught her hanging on the other day. *smirk*

Boys fall down! Kids get hurt! The first and perpetual lessons of parenting.... and the hardest. My little guy is 17 months old and has fallen down stairs, pulled a computer monitor onto himself, and had multiple head injuries. He's VERY active and was an early walker/climber. And I only have ONE kid to keep track of!

I had to resign myself to these things and stop taking damage when he got hurt. He ALWAYS gets hurt, and now when he does things that would make other kids scream, he just gets up and moves on... because this is who he is.

As my pediatrician says-- kids are rubber, and they bounce. He is fine, and you really shouldn't beat yourself up over it. Kids are often more resilient than we give them credit for.

This same thing happened to me when my daughter was about the same age. I was in our basement taking clothes out of the dryer and she was right there with me - I thought. She had somehow clibmed back up the stairs and fell all the way back down. I heard the noise and turned around to find her flat on her face on the basement floor. I ended up more upset then she was. She kept telling me was ok. She didn't have any marks on her and everything seemed to be fine. I didn't take her to the doctor. Somehow she didn't hit her head. I cried for days. She is 7 now. I know what you're feeling. It just takes a second for something to happen. I'm sure your son will be fine. I'm sure the hospital would have found it if something was wrong. It will just take time for you to get over it. It will be OK.

I went through the same thing, but I was standing right there when it happened. My then 12 month old was walking with me at the top of the stairs (at the time we lived in a house with no way of putting a gate at the top of the stairs.) she was helping with the laundry and was carrying a dish towel. She took off running and tripped on the towel and tumbled down five carpeted stairs. I felt so helpless and there was nothing I could do. She immediately cried, but no bumps, no bruises, no bleeding. I think I was more hurt than she was, she only cried briefly. I also took her to the DR. and they examined her and decided everything was fine. They didn't run any tests since she wasn't bleeding and did not really hit her head. I felt like the worlds worst mother! My husband was away for work when it happened and I just knew he would blame me, but he didn't. He was very understanding. I also worried about internal injuries, but she is now 21 months and growing just fine. Accidents happen! You can't prevent all of them!!! You are not a superhero and you are not the worlds worst mommy!

I think if you were go get a "worst" mommie award, so would the rest of us! Accidents happen! When my one son was about that age, his older brother decided to shove him down on my ceramic kitchen floor, and he ended up with 2 chipped teeth! Then one time when I was on my way out, (the boys were already in our garage), I heard a loud bang, my older one came running in and said that his brother was bleeding.....well I got out in the garage and there was blood EVERYWHERE! He was standing behind the older one when he decided to try his swing at baseball! Awful! But with a few stitches, he was fine. Anyways, my point is that he will be fine, and there will be times when accidents happen. Sometimes they will happen right infront of you. But you are a great mother and I know that your children know that and love you! Go easy on yourself! If you need more accident stories, please let me know -as I have lots more, and they are still young!!
M.

hi:-) Oh man-when i read your story i just had to respond; since a similar experience happened to us but with a bit worse outcome. last summer my son was just 15 months old when my 4 year old son decided to go barreling down the stairs in a wagon (which is now in garbage dump heaven) and right into my baby. My husband called me at work and I figured.."he's fine. I know he's not wanting to walk but it's probably just that he's scared because of the fall." Well-after 3 hours at home, i knew something was wrong cause he was still wimpering and refusing to move. So i took him into the E.R. and after several hours there, they confirmed that my little boy had a broken Femur!! He was put in a hip spica cast (which is a lot like a body cast for the lower body) for 5 weeks. It wasn't fun...at all...for any of us:-)
Since then, my son has fallen out of his crib, fallen off of the stairs and onto a piece of furniture and the list goes on. For some reason---boys are prone to these kinds of things:-) I know now to listen to his cues (even when he can't speak very clearly just yet) cause I know he's trying to tell me something.
If your son is acting normal and you've already taken him to the E.R. and they say he looks fine, then he most likely is. If he were whimpering constantly or just not being himself then that'd be a different story. I know how scared you must've been. I'm sure he is just fine. Boys are an entirely different story that girls. I can't figure this one out!!!
Friday night my little one climbed out of his crib and landed on his toy box leaving blood coming out of his nose and mouth! We almost took him to the E.R. but being as though I have an older son (who did the same thing when he was little), I decided to just clean him up and then I waited and observed. He immediately began acting normal once the initial shock wore off. I too was worried that he may have internal bleeding, but there hasn't been any symptoms of that. He's back to running, jumping and doing stunts all over the house with his big brother:-)Oh! these boys are gonna give me a heart attack one day!

Sounds like he's going to be just fine - you got him checked out by a doctor right away and they said that he's fine, and that's the best thing that you could have done, so don't beat yourself up about it!!! Accidents happen. Little kids are pretty tough and God made them to 'bounce' easier than adults. His bumps and bruises will heal in no time!

I can tell you that my daughter Nicole went out the front door, went to the back door and come stumbling down the basement steps and hit the concrete. She had a goose-egg on her head, we took her right to the pediatrician and she got all the tests and we did all the waking up and watched her. I was fine with the little bumps and bruising, until she was 7 and she saw diamonds in her eye on her left side and she would lose balance fall off her bike, fall down when she run or skip. She ended having epilipsy ( her aoura ) she was just out of whack, it is caused through genetics (her father but he grew out of it) and a fall to the head. I felt so guilty I even decided I was a bad mother, that when we divorced I let him have the kids (he never worked anyhow) so I paid child support. I have a relationship with my kids now. And Nicole graduated from college, has a strong marriage, and a baby due in May.

Try not to worry too much. This happens at least once to every child! Not the worst mommy, by far! Luckily those tiny ones are very pliable and have a lot of padding! Keep in mind he was rolling and did not fall straight from a high spot to the ground.
Welcome to the world of boys. I have an 8 year old boy that has broken 3 bones since he was 6. It will not be your last visit to the ER with that little guy! I also have 5 & 2 year old girls (that don't get hurt nearly as much as their brother)

Take Care!

Do not blame yourself! Something like this happens to every Mom. My daughter fell down the stairs when she was about 1. My husband went downstairs (left the door open) and I went into our bedroom while Julia was in the living room. It was weird, but I had this feeling that she was going to fall down the stairs before it even happened. Next thing I know I hear thuds and crying. I ran to her and she was crying, but ok. I felt terrible as well, but it was an honest mistake. We would never do anything to intentionally let her get hurt. You are absolutely not the "worst mommy"-just human and can't be everywhere all the time!

Try not to beat yourself up too much. These things happen and he's doing well. My son who is now 5 @ 27 months fell off our swing set in the back yard. No one saw him fall except his 3 1/2 year old brother who definitely wasn't reliable. I called the pediatrician and they told me what to look for. Within an hour, he started vomiting. We got to spend what was probably a very expensive evening (thankfully the insurance picked up the tab) in the Neuro ICU at childrens. He had a subarachnoid bleed in his head. The kept repeating the CT's because they could see things changing inside his head and how he was acting. He was very sleepy and not himself. The last CT looked stable so they let us go home the next morning. We followed up with the neurologist and one more CT that looked fine 3 months after the event.

If he's acting like himself, try not to worry and give him extra love. I'm sure he's fine or you would have noticed something strange. Take care!
C.

You are NOT the worst Mommy but I know EXACTLY how you feel! When my daughter was 5 mos. old I tripped on something my mom brought over and broke her leg!!!!! She had CT scans/x-rays as well and was fine except her leg. You cannot be there every second and they are quick aren't they! Don't feel guilty, he's fine! At least it was on your watch and not your husbands. In my opinion that would have been worst! Don't beat yourself up!

Every mother has moments in time she wishes she could rewind. The professionals checked him out and said he was okay. If you are still worried, take him to his pediatrician on Monday. Other than that, you must just take this hard learned lesson and and move on. You can't let the guilt of not being there for 15 seconds start to rule your every move. Toddlers get moving and there is no stopping them. I am as overprotective as it gets, yet, I realize I can't be everywhere. Every mom has been through this. You are not alone!

Stehpanie,

My son fell down a flight of stairs when he was about the same age. I was a first time mom at the time, and went to lift him up after he had crawled up the stairs. As he stood up, he fell backwards before I could reach for him and tumbled head over foot down about 13 stairs!
I was horrified. Did all the same things you did, although he showed NO visible signs of injury...not even a scratch! Amazingly, he too tested totally normal for everything. He didn't even cry at the end of the fall...just kept saying "booma! booma!". Anyway, it was a quick wake-up to watch his every move from then on. He's turning 18 next week and getting ready to leave for college. He's obviously just fine.
Don't punish yourself...no mother intends for their child to get into the mishaps that they all do get into. We've all had something happen at some point, or will. It happens.

My son fell down 10 stairs b-4 he was 1 year old and I did not take him to ER until later (after my hubby got me panicked). The reason I did not was because he never lost consciousness, eyes dialated normally and he was laughing w/in 10 minutes (at me crying - I waited that long till I knew he was fine before I broke down). He took a nap, ate normally and never threw up. But my husband (who is a worry wart) got me in a tizzy by 7pm that we took him to ER. Docs did not even do a CAT scan because of all the things I already mentioned and it had been a number of hours since the fall and he was fine. I was also told that we did NOT need to do the "waking every 3 hours" bit - it didn't really do anything. Anyway, I did feel guilty about not taking him in sooner and for not being more careful near the steps - he had crawled up them w/me behind him, I thought he started crawling down the hall so I stepped into bathroom directly at top of stairs to throw something in the garbage, only to turn around in time to see him on his knees and falling backwards. You will get past it - falls, cuts, bruises, etc. happen no matter how much you try and avoid and prevent them. You are not a bad mommy - things like this just happen in life. More will come - believe me - and you will get through it!

When my nephew was little he fell down my basement steps. He was fine but it could have be a catastrophe. We solved the problem so it would never happen again. My husband made a gate the attached to the door frame on the inside. We could still open and shut the door but when you opened the door to go down stairs you had to unlatch the gate, which swung into the basement stair well, before you were able to walk down stairs. Think about it, it really works great.

S.

Hi S.:
You did the right thing by taking your baby to get checked out. If the xray and dr all said he is o.k. then go with it. Don't worry. Babies are a lot tougher than we think. Don't make yourself crazy with guilt either. Accidents happen even when they are right in front of you. My three month old at the time fell right off the dressing table on face down on the hardwood floors. I did the same as you and rushed her to the ER. She was checked from head to toe but I never had heard her cry so hard and sound like she was in pain! In reality it was from knowing I was scared....they sense that fear! Everybody goes through some type of experience with there kids getting accidently hurt. You sound like you are a mother with good instincts; you'll know when your child is really hurt or if something is wrong. This doesn't make you a bad MOM by any means!
I am an aunt of 16, a mom of 2 and a daycare provider for 4 fulltime babies - the sayig of kids do the darndest things it true! I had a six month old baby a few months back stick his hand in a square ring that was hanging on the Leap Frog Bouncy seat and it got stuck. I tried everythig to get his chubby little arm free. After about a half hour I did get it loose but then realized it left a red mark on the babies arm. I was devistated, I called the Mom who is a friend of mine and she said its o.k. relax, accidents happen. Needless to say I called Leap Frog and they did make a recall on the seat. In all I was sitting right next to the children and stuff happens. Baby will be o.k. just make sure you start teaching him how to go up and down the stairs on his behind! Make it a game and have you other chidren help teach him. Good luck.

I felt the same way when my son fell off the bed at 10 months. I felt like it was my fault--I should have known better than to put him up there when he's mobile, etc. I felt like the worst and more irresponsible parent in the world. Talking to my sisters and other moms helped. I realized that no matter what I did or didn't do, I can't stop all accidents from happening. I didn't put him on the bed anymore, but he still manages to pinch a finger, etc. We can't be there every single second of the day to stop accidents, and even if we could, they'd still happen. To quote Dory from Finding Nemo, "If you don't let anything happen to him, how will anything happen to him?" Such is life.

As far as internal injuries go, I'm sure the ER doctor checked him very thoroughly. As long as he's behaving normally, doesn't seem tender or hot to the touch anywhere, and isn't overly sleepy, I'm sure he's fine. Just let your doctor know if you notice anything unusual with him.

Best of luck.

A.

You are not a bad mom. Accidents happen no matter what you do. Keep a close watch on his behavior and the signs for which the doctor said to watch. If he's doing fine and you're still worried, trust your instincts and take him back in. Push your doctor to test further just to be safe. No one knows a child like their mother. Good luck!

You are not alone! Both of my kids fell down the stairs, although no bloody noses. With the first one, I felt exactly like you. I thought I was going to die. I felt SO bad. But, she was fine. When it happened to the second one, I was upset, but not as worried that he was forever damaged.

You did all the right things to take care of him and make sure he'll be alright. It sounds like everything will be fine.

S

You're fine. Kids are quick... luckily, they tend to bounce! :)
Since you went to the ER & they checked him out & gave the all clear, he's probably just fine. A little bruised & sore, but fine.
The good thing is, for a short while, he'll remember this. The bad news is, he's only going to remember for a SHORT while, so make sure that door stays closed, or install a child-gate on the inside.

S.,
don't beat yourself up. Accidents happens and that's just what it was...an accident. You did the right thing in calling 911 and then following up at the er. Has it been the 48 hours? If he seems like himself...eating, drinking, going potty and bm's, I would bet he's okay. Don't focus on the "I should have's", focus on the fact that he's okay and chalk it up as a learning experience. After all, isn't that what raising kids is all about? My son fell off the couch because I didn't thing that he would scoot on it. He was okay but I still felt bad. You sound like a great mom! I would be worried if you didn't say anything.
Have a great day!
T.

I know how you feel. My then 18 month old baby was walking around in my living room and I had been working all day and sat down for just one minute. As soon as I sat down my baby boy started to cry. It seemed like a "I fell down" kind of a cry so I just called him to me, and when he turned the corner I saw a lot of blood cascading down his face and chest. He had cut his lip in such a way that a flap of it was separated from his face. I was HORRIFIED. I just sat down for one minute! And there were four other kids in the room with him ranging from 3 to 9 years old. We still don't know what he fell on to cut his face like that since the floor was clean but I had to take him to the ER and he needed five stitches. I just cried and cried the whole time. People asking me if a dog had gotten ahold of my baby. I couldn't tell them what cut him because I didn't know! I just felt AWFUL. Unfortunately we can only do the best we can - especially when we're by ourselves. Kids do and will get hurt. If you're a religious person (as I am) thank God your daughter was smart enough and quick enough to keep him from hitting the cement floor and it could have been worse. If he's fine then should be so happy and it scared you just enough to make very VERY sure he's secure the next time you have to work. So don't feel too bad. Nobody is perfect and none of us can forsee everything that could go wrong. (And give your daughter an extra treat and tell her how great it is that she's so quick - NONE of my kids would've acted so quickly!)A.

S.-
I think I have already earned that one....When my youngest (of 3) was 3 weeks old, I left her in her car seat upstairs in my room. My son (5) and daughter (2 1/2) were in the other room playing. I ran downstairs for a second and hear screaming from my son that my daughter had done something bad. Ran upstairs and saw the car seat tipped over and no baby. She was about 5 ft. away in our bathroom in between the toilet and shower (which just happens to have about a 3 inch ledge on it). Like you, I was feeling extremely worried, crying and feeling VERY guilty that I should have known better. She is/was fine and is now 4 months old. The more I talked to my friends and other moms I realized that these things happen and thankfully she wasn't hurt. It did take a few days of things running through my head of what could have happened, but you will be fine. Hang in there...

Absolutely not!!! You are not the world's worst parent- accidents happen. On Mother's Day we were at my husband's Aunt's house and our 12.5 mo old was playing with his 2 cousins (she is 3, he is 15 mo)- The 15 mo old took off thru the kitchen and- you guessed it- down the stairs he went- AND THAT WAS WITH A HOUSE FULL OF ADULTS AROUND!!! We ALL felt horrible!
Bangs, bumps and accidents are all part of of being a kid- and with the assistance of Him- they will have learned something from the experience and be all the better for it.
As long as your baby is not acting strange or anything like that, he will be fine. Kids are quite resilient and bounce back amazingly quick.

If he was checked out at the hospital I'm sure he's fine.Also, as long as he isn't throwing up or having trouble focusing,eating etc he's ok.If he is playing,sleeping and seems happy don't worry.

I!m happy to hear that your son is fine,do not beat yourself up for the unfortunate accident. It was just an accident, thank God he was unharmed. This incident does not make you a bad mom,just a more careful mom in the future. Be blessed than he only had minor injuries.

Hi S.,

You definetly do not earn the worst mommy in the world award. My daughter when she was about 2 fell down our basement steps. Thankfully she rolled down the steps. In my case I went downstairs to get some laundry and she decided to see where I was. I kept saying to her stay right where you are. So I think she squatted down to try and see me and her weight carried her forward. I swear when something like that happens to your child you seem to move in slow motion. My daughter was ok. This not only happened to me once, but twice. Same child, different circumstances. She was 6 and fell head over feet down some stairs at a friends house. I saw the whole thing, thankfully she walked away with only a fractured wrist. I had so many older ladies tell me that this too will pass. So don't beat yourself up over it. He's fine and you did the right thing by getting him checked out. It can happen to the best of us.

Hi S.,
It is very good to know what your children are up to and yes, keeping doors shut that leads to stairs is good to watch. Children as they grow are going to do something that can be serious but don't panic. Just keep an eye on them for a while and watch how they play and react for a while. Children do usually bounce back pretty fast. You can't be with them 24/7 so just try to remind others (even with a sign if need be) to always shut doors. Do your best, hang in there, and don't panic. Sometimes a mom that panics makes things harder than they really are. I have been around children that have fallen down stairs (more than once) and they bounced right back. I have 5 children. Mine have not fallen down stairs but they have had their share of accidents. I thankfully have never had to rush any of them to a doctor/hospital. Just watch them for a while and don't panic. Good luck, and have fun.

J. J.

It is perfectly normal to be worried but you had him checked out throughly and they didn't find anything wrong. I too, have an older daughter and a crawler who I have to keep reminding about doors and small items. You are not the first mom who's child has had an accident. My daughter had fallen back while sitting and I was only a few steps away. It is hard to be right there all the time with everything there is to do at home. It was an accident and you do not earn the world's worst mommy award.

I haven't read through all the responses, but hopefully you are getting the idea that you're in good company. Accidents happen and thankfully, everything is okay with your little boy. I, too, had a horrible accident, that happened over a year ago, yet I still started choking up thinking of how awful I felt about it when I read your email. My son was only 2 months old and I was holding him and slipped on my stairs. You would think my instinct would be to pull him closer, but he literally flew out of my arms and tumbled down the stairs and landed with a thump on the floor. I, too, called 911 immediately. My son actually had two small hemorrhages on his brain! Which, of course, sounded horrible. We spent the night in the hospital - during which I cried for just about 12 hours straight. By morning, his brain had healed and he is now a healthy 17 month old boy! Do NOT feel badly - though no matter how many stories you hear, you probably will. Accidents happen and as everyone told me - get used to it - having a little boy.

Hi S.,

Things do happen! I have not had the experience because I didn't live in a house when my first child was born, but I do now. Anyway, It is not your fault and you should not feel you are a bad mom! Accidents do happen! I am sorry that happend and you feel that way. Just wanted to let you know, I don't think you deserve a bad mommy award. Look at the bright side of things.. you thought quick enough to call 9-1-1 and then took him to the hospital. That would be more then some parents would do.

I hope your little man is ok.

L.

Hi S.,

I bet EVERY mom could give you a similar story - it happens and we feel like complete idiots. It sounds like your son is just fine...and that sinking feeling in your stomach will go away - your eight year old is still around so you can't be all that bad...ha ha! Our daughter took a header off the bed at 11 months on dad's watch and our son slipped out of the stroller and on to the cement while I was watching my daughter swim with my husband at the park district last winter...both are just fine and I'm sure I'll have stories to add later...hang in there!

I hate when this stuff happens! Bad mom - NOOOO! Accidents happen. I had a daughter who did a cartwheel down 8 stairs at 15 months old and a son who loved to jump off of high places until he was 2 1/2 years old. They are 10 and 13 now. Your decisive actions were prompt. Let it go - it's never easy to see them get hurt. As moms, we just do our best to respond to their injury promptly.

Oh my gosh, you are NOT the world's worst mommy! Everyone has this happen. I've had it happen multiple times! My son rolled right off the changing table with me standing right there, and I couldn't catch him in time. My daughter started climbing the stairs after my son, fell off the first step, rolled onto her arm funny and broke it (at 10 months old!). My daughter also started to climb up the stairs and fell down them in our new house before we got a gate, and I literally had looked away for 30 seconds while she was clear on the other side of the room. Then, she took a spill off the ottoman onto the wood floor and banged her head with me sitting right there - I couldn't catch her in time! (Can you tell my daughter is a daredevil?! It makes me crazy!)

Do not worry about your son - he is fine! You did everything you were supposed and more, calling 911, going to the ER, and waking him while he slept. You need to trust yourself, and trust that the doctors did everything they could to make sure he was fine. If they hadn't, they'd have a lawsuit on their hands, so you know they followed protocol. You need to let go and forgive yourself - God already has! It was an accident, and you were a wonderful mommy in the face of it! Enjoy every second with your precious little HEALTHY boy! :o)

Seems to me you are a very caring and wonderful Mom.
Please don't put yourself through the worry machine, it happens to all of us.

kudo's to your daughter for the fast thinking. If your worried it is ok to make a follow up appt with your doctor afterward to just double check. Most times they tell at the hopital to follow up with your own doctor. Mostly they have still so soft bone tissue they is nothing to worry about.

First of all, the fact that you are so worried shows what a GOOD mom you are, not the opposite. No mom in the world can keep an eye on a busy toddler every second of the day when they have a house to keep up, meals to cook, laundry to do, etc., etc., much less keep track of what an older child is opening and closing behind them as they both move at the speed of light.
Secondly, you took all of the medical steps necessary for the situation. You got him immediate attention and followed all of the medical advice given. He is going to be just fine. Keep in touch with your pediatrician via phone or even take him in for a follow up one week after the accident (and it was an accident! not your fault!) if it would make you feel better.
I watched my 15 month old daughter fall down an entire flight of stairs two weeks ago at our weekly playgroup. The mom who owned the house was standing two inches from her ON the stairs, I was standing at the bottom of the stairs and two other moms were standing very close by me in the basement playroom. She got by all four of us and still took a tumble. She is absolutely fine and it has not deterred her facination with climbing in the least. You are not a bad mom in any way, please don't feel guilty. I think you are a great mom :-)
Best,
Mary-Claire

You definetely are not the worlds worst mommy! We've all had experiences similiar to this. My daughter fell off my parents porch when she was about 13 months old (it was one step but it was a very deep step so she fell about the full height of herself)..she cut her lip open and scrapped her face up. I felt the same way you did..."why wasn't I right there to protect her?!" ..but there are going to be A LOT of times we can't be right there for them and they're going to get hurt..its a fact of life. Just feel grateful that he won't remember falling down those stairs at all..he's probably already forgotten about it as a matter of fact. I dont' know any mother that can constantly watch every single thing her child(ren) are doing so don't feel that you have to be that mom...you're doing a great job!!! :0)

As an ex ED nurse I can assure you that this experience has happened to many parents. I am sure they have all felt guilty about the accident occuring, but you just must get beyond it and be thankful your child is okay. In all the cases I have seen, no child was ever seriously injured. This also includes the ones who have gone down the stairs in walkers. They are very fast and these things happen. Do not punish yourself, enjoy your baby. No "worst mommy award" for you.

S., I would not beat your self up about this.When he gets older and starts to drive are you going to always be there ?no.Keep a close eye on him for the next few days .If you took him to your ER and they said he was fine. trust them.Just be lucky and thank that little girl for helping her brother.You can't be every where all the time so don't blame your self.I too have a very energetic boy who will be 13 soon.And when he was about the same age he jumped into a 10 gal fish tank that I had just cleaned and cut his legs up.I knew he needed stickes .This boy also when He was about 8 got into an bike accident cut his throat he needed stickes.What I am trying to say boys will be boys Don't get upset so easliy or you will have a long road in front of you Just watch your son grow up. they grow so fast.

Hello S.

First off, you did not earn the world's worst mommy award over this incident! I am sure you are a good Mother. Look what your daughter did, she stopped him from going all the way to the cement floor, she got that from you! It is normal to feel that something might be wrong internally, but if the doctors are not worried about it, then maybe they are right. I am sure they felt him all over and didn't feel anything out the the ordinary. Remember, we are Mothers, but we can not be with our children all the time. There will be other times that you will be a split second away.

Take care & God's Blessings

D.

this will be the first of many falls of some kind or another. I know its hard not to panic but just take a deep breathe.. in through the nose out through the mouth. check was there loss of consiosness? vomiting? are the pupils equal if so just monitor does anything hurt? Difficulty walking, bending an arm? If not just watch him I know my son fell of a stool and the goose egg on his forhead brought tears to my eyes and I wanted to rush him to the ER. my husband stopped me and asked what I would tell a mom if they called in the drs office... we moms can not be there a 100% of the time and when we are that still doesnt mean somethings not going to happen. just give him a big hug and kiss and forgive yourself.

S.

My son is 3, and we have been to the ER every year (starting at 10 mo) with some accident or another. At 10 mo it was stitches (fell while walking), 24 mo it was a broken arm (fell in the bathroom) and at 3 it was hand in the elevator. I'm not a bad mom and either are you.

Accidents happen, kids get hurt. Especially high energy little boys! I have learned to let the guilt come and then quickly get over it. You cannot watch over them and be on top of the every waking minute of the day, it is not good for either of you.

You have to trust the doctors and not worry about what could of been. And you have to stop beating yourself up over it happening, you can't undo it. Besides, he will get bigger and he will get into bigger things and take bigger falls. One day he will be 18 and he may come home on a motorcycle!

Hi S.. Try to stop beating yourself up. Unfortunately things happen. I think most everyone has an oops story they feel guilty about. Mine being, leaving my not yet able to roll 2 mo. old sleeping on the couch while I got up for literally a couple mins.. Guess what? He rolled right off that couch. I felt like the absolute worst parent on earth. But thank God he was okay and I never did that again. Live and learn sweetheart and your daughter probably will too learn from this as well. We wouldn't be good parents if we didn't think about these things.

First, I'm sure you're a great mom and accidents happen. Second, listen to your doctors. They would not have sent him home if they were even remotely worried. Stop beating yourself up and chalk it up to a lesson hopefully learned by your son.

PS Glad that nothing serious was wrong!

We had a similar incident with our 23 month old a few years back. My husband went into the basement, closed the door with the child proof knob but unfortunately my daughter pushed hard enough on the door to get to daddy that the door swung open (door opens backwards)causing her to fall down the stairs. My husband who was not all the way down, caught her but not before she had bashed her nose on the wooden stairs. We went through the same thing as you, we felt so guilty for not making sure the door was secure. We had just come home from the hospital that day with our other newborn daughter and I felt it was my fault for spending too much time with the baby that I didn't watch every move my toddler was making. We immediately fixed the door which was misaligned due to house settlement and got carpet on the stairs. The good news is, she is a perfectly healthy 6 year old now who has no memory of the fall. All we can do is learn from our mistakes and thank the powers that be that those little guys are tougher than they look. Don't beat yourself up. Accidents happen!

Don't beat yourself up about this. I think you thoroughly had your son checked out and he is doing okay. Now, you have to forgive yourself.

My son has fallen down the stairs a few times and these things happen. Even yesterday, I was right next to him (on the same step) and he missed his step and just about did a back flip down the stairs. It still can't believe his neck is okay.

I think you'll find that your experience is quite common even among the best moms. We can't always be on top of our kids. And, it is a learning experience for them too.

You for sure do not earn the worlds' worst mommy award!! You do earn a mommy award though! I know it had to have been scary and thankfully everything checked out ok. As long as everything checked out ok I bet he is fine. Just from a fall down the stairs where he did not hit the bottom, I am not a Dr., but would not think it would do anything internally more than cause a few brusies of that. Our little ones are pretty resislant to these types of things. Do not beat your self up over these things. Everyday we as parents learn something new every day. I am sure your little if just fine and woudl also just remind your daughter to make sure she always closes the door behind her, I bet she will never foget now either. Just love on your little man a little extra today!

Welcome to motherhood! :-) You did everything right and can't be in all places at all times. The 8 year old did great with her quick thinking and I'm sure she will be more careful with that door from now on after that scare. If the 911 techs, the ER Drs. and the pediatrician all say he's fine, I'm sure he is. Relax, breathe and Thank God! And get ready for his next fall--he's a boy--they play hard!

As a RN who worked many years on the pediatric unit, peds md offices, on peds unit, and triaged many peds calls, I have witnessed many falls. Kids are resilient at this age. Most of the time the kids are unscathed. My sister's 2 year old daugher accidentally fell down 13 hardwood steps 5 months ago and xrays were negative. She's currently as active as a normal 2 yr old. Of course now my sister is overly cautious with the stairs. Monitor your child closely for any behavior changes or changes in orientation, vomiting, unable to awaken, headache, speech , gait, blood in urine or stool, any kind of abdominal pain or any unusual signs. Call your md immediately with any changes or if you're truly concerned. Also know that most doctors can be paged. See if he/she has an answering service where they contact your MD for you. He/she can allay all of your concerns.

I haven't looked but I bet there are a lot more stories. So, it was about 16 and a half years ago (my baby is seventeen, almost eighteen) and my older son was perhaps five and little one is one. So we are watching the big game, drinking a couple of beers, I have a gate on the steps,and I am not worried. Suddenly there was screaming and the big one comes running. He and the other one somehow managed to knock the gate down and the little one went tumbling and he has a big bruised bent leg. Now we smell like beer, the big game will not be seen because we think we should bring the baby to the hospital. Of course the older one fell a couple of days before on his bike or something and now we have two bruised children, smell like beer and some nurse is quizzing the older one about his bruise. Oh great now they are going to think that we are child abusers. Because of course she is sniffing our breath. Well, to make a long story short, baby was fine, older one was fine and I think the Bears won the Superbowl or something. So don't worry, you are not a bad mother, you are just human and you are joining a long line of people who did not velcro their children to their sides.

If you were a bad mommy you wouldn't be tormenting yourself like this. Accidents happen and there's nothing we can do about that but try to prevent them. Talk to the daughter about responsibility of closing the door without making her feel guilty, just extra careful so this never happens again. A tension screen might be another recourse. Baby will be opening doors any time now that he knows about that knob. They are curious and very investigative little people. Be good to yourself mommy. We can't always catch them when they fall.

OMG... I laughed so hard reading your request! The only reason I am laughing though is cuz- been there done that! And since your son is ok it is fine to laugh now!

I have fallen down the stairs with my son, I have dropped him on his head, he was pushed from another boy from a 3rd floor balcony and landed head first, fell down stairs hismelf etc.... we have been through all that as well! None of those caused any serious injuries...broken bones but nothing life threatening. He does love wearing a shirt now, 19 years later,that says- My ma dropped me on my head!

We have spent many hours, days and all in the hospital over injuries. They do check the abdomen by touch to see if there is any guarding or pain when it is done. It is great how you can tell when someone makes a funny face including babies that says it all! They would also be able to tell by the way he is acting so I am pretty positive there is nothing internal going on- you would know! If you do noticed something major call the Dr again!

My daughter recently fell from our bed. We waited over 24 hours to take her to the ER. We finally did when I made the mistake of calling her Dr and he said we had to take her. She was guarding her arm but I figured it was just sprained... I was right! Sent her home with a goofy sling they said she probably wont ever wear. She didnt!

I also had my daughter in her carrier and put her on the floor so I could get the groceries out of the car. As I walked in I saw my dog accidently step on the one side of it and she flew forward and the way her neck bent and all I ended up taking her to the ER. It was swollen and they did x-rays and all. Sent us on our way with a stern warning. Made me feel like an azz!

Son got into a locked cabinet when he was 3 while I was throwing laundry in. He took out all the medicines in childproof bottles and decorated a cake with them. We were not sure if he took any so to the ER we went. Since the medicines were serious they pumped his stomach and found out he took none!

I could go on and on! Just know you are not alone! And you can not lock your child in a padded room to avoid every possible thing! Of course by the time they are 18 you might have to be the one locked in the padded room! lol

Tell your daughter Nice Job! That was some very fast thinking on her part and she should be very proud of herself!

Many blessings to all of you!

You did everything right. Accidents happen no matter how careful you are.
This may help you feel better. When my daughter was around 2 she came into my husband's office crying. I kept asking her what happen, but with all the crying I could not understand her at all. So thinking I was smart I asked her to show me what happened. So I followed her as she started walking up our basement stairs and right before my eyes she made herself fall down the stairs!! I now knew what happened and why she was crying. I also learned NEVER to ask her to show me what happened!!!!

Do not think of yourself as a bad mom. My daughter fell down the stairs when she was about 11 mos old. My son fell down the stairs when he was about 14 mos old. You feel terrible but things happen. You try your best to cover all your bases and be everywhere at once, but sometimes things happen. Dont be too hard on yourself.