Hi Mamas!
My son is turning 1 next week, and still does not successfully hold his own bottle. Laying down, he can hold it and pull it up to his mouth, however if he is sitting upright, he does not seem to know that he has to lift it up higher to get the liquids. As soon we touch the bottle in effort to show him it has to be tilted higher, he immediately lets go and wants (expects?) us to hold it up for him. (I can't help but picture a little king, being hand fed grapes by his harem!) Anyhow, I've been leaving him with the bottle, in hopes that he'll just 'figure it out' but after a few minutes of sucking on the nipple to no avail (because he won't lift it), he gives up and just crawls away. I know we probably are 'at fault' because we've been too attentive, in that we always held his bottle for him and should have tried to enforce it earlier. He was primarily breastfed though, and only had bottle contact twice a day (while I'm at work) so perhaps that's another reason for the lack of bottle experience. Also, I'm sure him being the first grandchild made my family more than a tad attentive to him by always holding his bottle for him. I guess by nature he was and is going to be spoiled a little more!
I've introduced the sippy cup, in hopes of transitioning and starting anew. He's been grabbing at it and will suck/chew on the spout, but again just like with the bottle, he won't tilt it up to get the water out. Also, we've given him liquids via cups, but we've always held that for him as it has gotten quite messy with him preferring to stick his hands into the liquids or toppling it over so he can splash around more. In a related note, he DOES know how to self feed though, and can bring food (and all other questionable foreign objects) to his mouth just fine.
What do you experienced Mama's make of this? I figure he'll have to eventually 'get it', but I'm wondering if its sometime 'soon', during toddlerhood, or are we 'doomed' to help him until he turns 5! (Kidding.... I think!)
I don't think it'll be long. My son is 13 months and now will hold a bottle himself. Last month he wasn't though. I also breastfed primarily and I think he got spoiled by grandma while I was at work. I saw my co-worker's 8 month old holding her own bottle and got a little nervous.
Anyway, my advice is to give him a short bottle. The longer ones were harder for my son to hold.
Greetings B.: I too have a Prince- smile- who is now a father himself. He never even had to learn to walk anywhere because someone was always willing to carry him.
I promise you that as long as there is nothing wrong physically- he will figure it out as soon as he has to. I don't think he will go thirsty for long- now he may get upset because the attention he used to get is less but once he discovers a fun world where he has the power to eat and drink on his own he will be off and running with it.
I really liked the visual of his being fed grapes because I felt the same way about our son & I can tell you he is a wonderful man and father now! Nana G
B.,
We tried everything under the sun and found that our daughter does good with the sippy cup with the straw (no tilting). She wasn't drinking as much in the beginning so we decided to add a little strawberry Nesquick. She is now 19 months and is doing great with her cup and regular milk :0)
Hope this is a little help.
T.
Don't worry about spoiling him by holding things up for him as he learns...He will not only eventually "get it" but he will be crawling away from you more and more as you want to keep holding him close. Sometimes we feel as though they will never stop clinging and wanting to be close , but if you were to hear the mothers at the senior talk about their grown children you would get the perspective that as we age we want our children to be close and listen to us and help us and feel needed by us far more than they possibly can. It's all part of a life process and the only certain thing is that they will go on to another stage. Enjoy being needed. Blessings on your family, N.
B.,
Do not worry - how many 18 year olds do you see walking around that do not know how to hold/tilt something to get the liquid out whilst drinking. :-) My b/g twins are 20 months, and they finally (about a month ago) got it that they need to tilt their sippy cup up to get all the milk or water out. Now I'll admit, we would hold their sippy cups for them when they transitioned from bottles; and I was not in a hurry to not do that as it was my special bonding time with them. As they get a little older, they will not want you holding it - then they'll just magically seem to get it. I hope my two cents helps. :-)
Well, you could just go straight to a "real" cup. Granted, he'll probably spill it all over himself at first, so just give him an inch of water in his cup until he gets the hang of it. Once he understands how a real cup works, then he'll have no issues with the sippy cup.
My other thought is, you could get one of those sippy cups that has a straw. Then he can hold it upright and still drink out of it.
But yes, in general this is the age when you just have to make him figure it out! =)
I do not think you can be too attentive to an infant, so do not worry! Yes, he probably associates drinking with nursing and being fed a bottle, and those are comforting, relational activities for him, as they should be! If you recently weaned him, this may be part of the issue for him. Personally, I would continue to feed him his milk/formula the way he wants. But I would try to get him to take water (or watered down juice) in some kind of a cup, and encourage him to do it himself. Eventually he will!
My 18 month old only wants her non-nursing liquids via a "real" cup now (like her big sister), and she makes a mess too. We stick with water and let her go at it most of the time.
I would try a playdate or 2 with other 1 year olds - make sure everyone gets a bottle or sippy - hopefully he'll watch the others and figure it out.
You probably just spoiled him - it doesn't sound like he's developmentally delayed - he's just lazy ans smart!
My son didn't want to learn to crawl - wanted me to carry him everywhere - unitl he started day care at 10 months and was the only baby that wasn't mobile - he crawled on day 3 and walked about 3 weeks later and was running by the time I got home from work that night.
It sounds like he's just trying to keep your attention with this. I think what I would do is when he's having meals simply keep on introducing the straight cup or glass (not a sippy), and when he's having a bottle at other times, keep on encouraging him to hold it himself. Personally, that bottle would be going soon anyway. I weaned my kids from the bottles as soon as they turned one, but I know some parents would rather let them use them a little longer. You will need to hold the glass for him for a little while, but begin encouraging him to hold it himself and teach him that he does not put his hands in it or otherwise play with it. It takes a lot of patience and firmness but it will eventually work out... and likely sooner than you expect. What we do with the toddlers in our care is that when they begin playing with their food or drink, we warn them once, and then if it continues we simply say "ok, you're through eating (or drinking)" and we take away the plate or cup, wash their hands and faces and send them to play. They don't get to come back to the table until the next scheduled snack or meal. It may sound mean, but the child will not go hungry or thirsty and they will begin to understand how to eat without playing with the food or drink. (Of course we offer water anytime in between snacks or meals too, particularly with the kind of heat we've been having lately.)
You may be thinking "but he's not quite a year old yet" but trust me, they are ready to begin learning these things even before a year and when you see him handling his cup like a pro at 18 months of age, you'll be happy you took the time to work with it now.
Hi B.,
Your son sounds normal for a baby who hasn't had all that much practice with bottles/sippy cups due to breastfeeding, and I'm sure he'll pick up the skill with no problem in the next few months. He's enjoying your help/attentiveness now, but very soon he'll want to do it all on his own, and you'll be at your wits end with that, too!
In the mean time, if you want to hurry him along, remember babies learn the most by imitation. Make sure the time he spends with you includes you modeling what you want him to do...make sure he sees you drinking from cups (adult ones). If you really want to reinforce the lesson, fill a sippy cup for yourself and model drinking from it with exaggerated sounds and movements that will catch his interest: "Whew, Mommy is thirsty! I'm going to drink some water from this sippy cup. Watch Mommy: I lift it WAYYYY up, and GULP GULP GULP, ahhhh! That's better!" My daughter learns so much just from watching us go about our daily lives--it's taught us to be careful what kind of ordinary behavior we're modeling for her!
J.
Hi B.,
I personally think a straw cup is the way to go. I know being on a sippy cup too long is not good for their teeth just the same as a bottle. I transitioned all my kids to a straw cup at one year. It takes just a little bit to teach them to drink from a straw. You can put a straw in some liquid, put your finger over the top end so some liquid is trapped in it, put the bottom end in their mouth, and when they start sucking, let your finger off the top so the liquid goes in their mouth. They get the idea pretty quickly that if they suck on the straw, something comes out. From that, the transition is pretty simple. I've always felt straw cups are better, and none of my kids took to the sippy cup, anyway. That solves your problem while weaning him from the bottle at the same time. Good luck!
Hello B.,
I never encouraged my daughter to hold her own bottle, because I knew at one it was going into the trash and I didn't want her to connected to it.
As far as the sippy cup goes, he will have to figure it out. I would just tilt it for him and try to get him to hold it. Maybe keep it at an angle where he only gets liquid out of it when he's touching it. He will eventually figure it out.
Best of luck,
C.
My daughter started figuring out the whole concept of tilting the cup at about 13 months so I don't think you're too far behind. Another thing, with the weather being hot, you may want to let him practice with a real cup in a wading pool.
My son is over 18 months and still only uses a sippy cup for milk feeds when I'm holding him. He eventually started holding the cup himself. For water during the day he uses a sippy cup with a straw. I also walked to a friend who pointed out that using a straw is a 'transferable skill' whereas tipping up a sippy cup the amount that is needed to drink (and sucking on a spout) isn't, so the straw cups could actually be more helpful developmentally. (That's just an idea, not medical advice!)
E.
I'd try a spill-proof sippy with a straw. My 18 month old twins have used them for a while and like them. He'll get it eventually! Enjoy him, enjoy your time together, be blessed.
My older daughter was the same way and we got her those Nubi bottles with the flip-up straw and she *loved* them. Eventually she figured out the sippy cup too, but much later.
My one year old daughter picked up on the sippy cup right away, seems like some kids are just different!
-S.
