1 Month Old Won't Sleep on His Back

D.
for your sleeping problem, you have alot of good advice, i don't think i can really help you...plus i didn't do ANYTHING i was told to do as far as the sleeping goes. i had my daughter sleep with me the 1st 6 months (sids paranoia one of those if she's not in a crib, she cant get it kind of stupid ideas). i figured with being this frightened, i wouldn't sleep heavy, and would wake every 30 min or so to check on her and not have to get up just to make sure she was breathing. which thank got, she was fine. i did keep waking, and was able to check on her very often, but it is dangerous to keep a child in your bed (so many have rolled over on their child). once in her crib, i kept her bumpers in, i kept a couple of stuffed animals at the foot of her crib, and once she was almost 1 yr, i started having her sleep with a pillow, and after 2 months, i decided to just give her one of mine (it fits snug into the crib so she can't have it cover her head if she rolls off of it). i know that ALL these are no-nos, but i was lucky enough for nothing bad to happen (i also happen to get up many times a night to check on her).
as for the smoking. my husband and i both smoke, and we both try to not smoke around her as much as possible (more so me than my husband). when she's awake, up and around, IF we need/want a cigarette, we walk into the back room (we're in the basement, so that's the part of the basement that's not finished and she's NOT allowed in there) and we smoke, we also keep the door shut since she's not allowed in there. (sometimes my idiot husband lights his cigarette in this room then walks out of the room, and that pisses me off, but he NEVER listens, having him actually leave the room is amazing for him). when she's asleep, we have an air purifier in our living room, and we open the door to the back room with the fan on to push the smoke into that room and towards the air purifier (which we mounted to the ceiling to catch the majority of smoke since smoke rises). when outside we do smoke around her (not in the car as it's becoming illegal throughout the states) but we try to make sure we're either standing, or have it to where the smoke is above her head. we try to fabreeze everything and/or lysol it after smoking, before she returns to the room, but she's not allowed in until all smoke is gone for AT LEAST 10 min and there's no smell left in the room. i know that it's not the best, but it's better then actually smoking in the room with her, and having to deal with someone that refuses to not smoke in the house you have to compromise some way, and that's the ONLY way that seems to work for my husband. i honestly think that if we lived on the ground level (at least somewhere with windows that could open) he would either smoke outside, or next to an open window. see if maybe you can suggest to your husband to get an air purifier, and maybe get him to smoke in the other room near the window with it open (and ALWAYS keep that door shut) just to try and reduce the smoke as much as possible. i wish you the best of luck with the sleeping thing...you really have to find what's right for you.

Hi D.
I strongly recommend you allow your son to sleep on his tummy. In this position babies feel safe and secure. Remember that the SIDS warnings are for the entire population, and it sounds as if your baby is not in a high risk category. Those really in the know, such as the Domans at the Institute for Human Potential in Philadelphia, recommend stomach sleeping for babies. Please read 'How to Teach Your Baby to Be Physically Superb : Birth to Age Six' (Gentle Revolution Books: Glenn Doman,Douglas Doman,Bruce HAGY etc.) in which the structure of the brain is explained. You could order a copy from the library. Stomach sleeping is healthy for your son's development. My son is a healthy 23 month old and was a happy stomach sleeper. Good luck and let me know how it goes.

Dr's change the preferred sleep position so often. When my 15 year old was born I was told to put her on her tummy to sleep. When my 12 yer old was born I was told to put him on his side. I used a sleep positioner for my son to keep him on his side. I would let your son sleep on his tummy. Make sure the sheet fits tight on the mattress and don't leave anything else in the crib. On cooler nights you can use a blanket sleeper instead of a blanket.

I had the same problem with my daughter. If you put her down on her back she would just start screaming. It didn't matter if she was asleep already. Someone had suggested to me to let her sleep upright in her car seat for a month. They said she might have gas and laying down hurts. The car seat worked she went from barely sleeping to sleeping six hours at night for and infant it was very good. When she was about 2-3 months old we started sleeping her on her tummy with nothing in her bed with her. The doctors change their minds every few years on how a baby should sleep. Sometimes it's tummy, side or back. You have to do whats easiest for your baby and what YOU are confortable with.
Good luck,
Jenn

I had the same problem with my daughter. She startled herself and wouldn't sleep on her back. I finally started putting her to sleep on her belly. I figure, we all slept on our bellies and are alive to talk about it. I just made sure nothing else was in the crib, including a bumper that could smother her. Now my daughter is 3 months and can flip and move, so I'm not worried. Good luck. D.

Hi there,
I know we all worry about SIDS, it cant be helped. My son wouldnt sleep on his back either and i put him to sleep on his tummy. Like the previous post said 'we all sleept on our tummys and lived to tell about it'. The doctors have something new to say all the time...a few years ago when my niece was born the doctors said no way to putting a baby to sleep on its back and should sleep on its side. what are parents to do! do whats right for your child and if he will only sleep on his tummy then just make sure theres nothing in the crib near his face and check on him a little extra...Im sure he'll be fine! best of luck!

Hi! I'm a mom from Roxbury. I personally wouldn't worry about your little guy wanting to be on his tummy. All 3 of my kids wanted to sleep on theit tummies. When my daughter was first born she would scream and I knew she was tired. But as soon aass I put her on her tummie she was out like a light. With my boys I was able to us a wedge to prope them on there sides and tummie. I bought a thin wedge that is made to go between the mattress and the frame($10-15 Babiesrus). It is actually for babies when they have head colds. The incline helped relieve pressure. For me it gave me the peace of mind that when my kids were on their tummies and spit up it wouldn't collect by there nose and mouth. I'm the type of mom who loves to keep touching so I would always touch their faces or backs. I read SIDS sometimes happens when babies go into a very deep sleep and don't wake up. So I found that wheen I touched them lightly enough for them to stir just enough to move a facial muscle or even a beautiful sigh it made me better and it kinda brought them out of a deep sleep. OH please don't think I'm suggesting to wake your son. LOL. Just light touches. I hope I was of some help. Enjoy! Kids grow to fasst!-K.

Congratulations on your baby boy! My first was a very active sleeper. The morning after I found her squished up against the bassinet bedding I bought a sleep positioner. They can be found in most baby departments. I have used them with all 3 of my babies until they could roll themselves back over because by then there is not much you can do. With a sleep positioner, you place the baby in-between the pads at waist level - absolutely do not go higher than armpits due to suffocation hazard. They can still be swaddled and the positioners keep them from rolling. The one I used with my youngest was the The First Years Air Flow Sleep Positioner by Learning Curve. It was light and small and you could make it snug so baby wouldn't creep down. Here is a link;

http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=234185...

and the description:
"Developed in consultation with Dr. T. Berry Brazelton, this sleep positioner is designed for greater air circulation and proper sleep position. It helps keep sleeping infants on their backs as recommended by the American Academy of Pediatrics, and easily adjusts as your child grows. Fully ventialted with a breathable mesh cover to keep baby cool while sleeping. Positioner is 100 percent washable. Ages newborn to 6 months."

Since they are inexpensive get 2 of them. Sometimes spit-up or leaky diapers happen and it is nice to have a clean one at the ready! Hope this helps.

A.

There are TONS of sleep positioners that work really well. Here's a link to the whole bunch offered at Target:

http://www.target.com/b/ref=sc_pfc_r_6_0_13035421_4/601-#...

Here is a link to the one I used with my son. I and he loved it!

http://www.target.com/Head-N-Back-Sleep-Positioner/dp/B00...

D.:

Congratulation on your little boy, I am also a first time mom and like you I read and keep myself informed about anything pertaining to my baby and her development, risks, safety etc. My daughter is 9 mo old now and I quickly learned that no matter how much you read and how much advice you get there is nothing better than your own instinct, even my dr said that. There is no right or wrong way to do anything, there is your way and you will do what works for you. Like you I was concerned about SIDS but my daughter like your son seemed to sleep better and longer while on her tummy so that is what I did. She always slept on her tummy during the day, and at night (this means when I went to sleep about 11 pm) I would put her down on her back b/c I felt I was going to be less vigilant. She then started to sleep a bit better at night I guess b/c during the day she was sleeping well. I also swaddled her at night, which in some cases also helps. Because she spent so much time on her tummy she quickly developed neck strength so at the 3 mo mark I would always put her to sleep on her tummy, she still does. Hope this helps. Again follow your instinct and if something doesn't feel right don't do it, if it does be willing to try even if it is unconventional. Always keep safety and health in mind.

Again congratulations and from a new mother to another I can say that motherhood will be the wildest ride of your life with its ups and downs but worth every second.

O.

I would put a stop to smoking in the house altogether. I am not being judgmental...my fiance and I smoke but never inside or around our daughter at all. It's not fair for her to be exposed to smoke especially when she is helpless and needs us to make these decisions for her. BUT if you can get Dad to smoke outside for no other reason than the risk for SIDS being down in that aspect, and then you have less to worry about if you absolutely cannot get baby to sleep on his back.

I used these mattress covers.

http://www.babysake.com/

Good luck,
G.

Hi, I'm a new Mom, my daughter is 6 weeks old today. I had a similar issue. I bought the sleep positioner from Babies R Us as well as the sleep sack. The first trick was making sure she was warm enough at night, the second was the positioner. The crib and bassinette were too big for her and this made her feel more secure. Hope this helps and good luck with your little boy.

there are different types of bolsters for different types of sleeping positions. you may want to try sleeping him on his side with a bolster. perhaps he doesn't like being on his back. but if you're adamant about him being on his back then try a bolster for that. if he's only 1 month old then he's probably not rolling over on his own yet so you can still get a couple of months of use out of these bolsters

i would keep him on his back until he is able to roll from his stomach to his back. do a lot of tummy time during the day so he builds up the muscles. my daughter is 8 weeks and started rolling from her front to back. i am going to check with my ped this week at the 2 month check up, but my plan is to start letting her sleep on her stomach since she, like your son, prefers that too.

try to be understanding of your husband, and instead of getting angry at him, tell him that he must have been really tired to fell asleep while he was supposed to be watching the baby on his tummy. thank him for letting you sleep while he was so tired too. this will let you know that you appreciate him and it might make him more agreeable when you suggest that next time your husband is so tired, he should try putting his son down on his back.

also, as far as the smoking ask your husband to smoke outside because the studies show that even in another room it increases the chances of sids.

that said, i totally understand where you both are coming from. when you are tired you will do just about anything to get some sleep. i hope it works for you.