To Circumcise or Not?

If I were to go back I would have had my son circumcized. He was not and he is now 18 months old. He screams every time I have to pull the fat back so that it can be cleaned. But he's come close to having infections a few times because it's hard for me to listen to him scream every time I do it. I would have rather have listened to him scream the one time. Usually its more that they don't like people messing with them and holding them down.

I have 2 sons who are now 14 and 10. Both are circumsized, no regrets. This was a not an issue for us, we both agreed on this one. We did this for several reasons. Yes, I did want my boys to be same as dad. I did do it for religious reasons. I had never even seen and uncircumsized penis before I gave birth. I did do it for cleanliness. Thank God I did! My sons didn't like to clean it when they were younger and I would've felt weird cleaning it for a preschooler. One of my sons didn't even like to touch it to aim it toward the toilet, when going pee.
This is a personal choice and you yourself will make the right choice for you.
Happy Monday
K.

Hi Vlery,

It sounds like you have already made your decision, so go for it! I also did lots of researching before my boy was born (he is 8 months now) and found that it doesn't seem to be unusual if the parents don't want to circumcise their sons. AAP does not recommend doing it any more because they came to the conclusion that the possible benefits of the procedure are not significant enough to make it mandatory. You should check AAP website for the details.

Just make sure you let everyone who is going to be with you during the birth know that you don't want it and don't sign the paper. When I ended up in hospital I was asking my midwife to make sure that I was understanding what I was to sign. Nobody can force you doing that.

Best luck to you.

Warmly,

I.

I would say for the sake of hygiene and also being able to look the same as his brother, I would do it.....I too have a son who is circumcised and I just nursed him right after and he did just fine. Good Luck!!!

Hi V.,

I have a son 16 months. We chose to circumcise him because my husband was. In researching pros and cons, there was no real reason to do it except that the materials showed the child would be more comfortable looking like his fathers. In your case, you may want to consider it because you have already done your first sons.

The nurses took my son in the hospital and brought him back after it was done. He was sound asleep and had no problem with the healing.

Hi V.,
I am a first time mom with a son who is now 13 1/2 months old. My husband and I decided to not circumcise him when he was born. We did our research and didn't find any reason that it was a medical must do so we didn't and we are completely happy with our decision. In fact, more parents are choosing not to circumcise these days but many still do. It really is a personal decision. I hope this helps and enjoy your new baby boy!!!!

Sara

I totally disagree with the women who say that not circumsizing your son is a good choice. My father wasn't circumsized and he had tons of problems with it, from what my mother told me. It is hard to keep it clean. It can also be painful for the boy when it comes time to have intercourse because the skin could rip back. Not to mention the ridicule your son will go through when he gets older. (This is America where it isn't a normal thing to not have it done.) It isn't very nice looking. When he is older, girls may be turned off by it. My little brother wasn't circumsized either (my step mom didn't want to put him through that after just being born, give me a break.) Getting it done now is a good decision. Although he would be able to get it done in the future, it is a very painful procedure. I have a friend who had it done because he kept giving his wife infections (because it was hard to keep clean). He said it was the worst pain he had ever felt. I just had a boy 4 months ago, and there was no question in my mind that it needed to be done. He won't remember it getting done and doctors say they can't even feel it (the nerves down there aren't completely developed yet). However, it is your decision. I just hope you make the right one, for the future of your son. Good luck.

Hi V.,
I have a son, who is now 3. I did not want to have him circumcised. My husband is jewish and it was very important to him. We had a homebirth and no intervention in the birth at all, so it was really hard for me to understand. This was one I had to give to my husband and we did decide to do it. We had a bris with all of our family and friends in our home and a mohel. He was surrounded by a lot of love. Although our son was fine, it was not the happiest day of my life. He is a very sensitive child and he does not want anyone to touch his penis at all. So it is very hard to keep clean and he has a lot of rashes. I sometimes wonder if this was because he was circumcised or if he would have had even more problems had we not.

If I had to make the decision on my own, I would not have done it. Ultimately I feel like it is a form of violence.

I wish you strength and clarity in your decision. And a beautiful birth.

Hi, V.,

I have 4 sons ages 17-14-11-4 all had it done and the older ones say they are glad from them to you: My oldest said Quote; "tell her its better than having to move the skin and clean it that's gross I am so glad you had ours done Mom"

Just thought you might like to have his opinion...also your first son is so the little guy might think he is different later...I say go for it! Its better looking, cleaner,(i had a friend whos son got infected because she didnt realize she was going to have to move the skin to clean under it untill he was about 7 and was sure to do it on his own!)

Just some advice from a mom and her 4 sons (ok 3 the 4 year old was not asked for his opinion yet...lol)

This can be a loaded topic.

::This is frankly just my opinoin, and my husband's first hand experience. I DO NOT want any debate on it. AS if that is the case. Please do not read my response.::

We would be getting our little boy circumsized IF we were having a little boy. We are blessed with another girl. (Poor Hubby, he really wants a boy.)

My husband works in the medical field. He worked in a care home for 5+ years and also at the local hospital for 5+ years. What he's experienced in older men that are not circumsized is that they tend to get infections much more frequently. With age, the foreskin shrinks and can be painful. He's seen many older men who have penial cancer (the ones he's seen have not been circumsized . NOT that he's saying that if you circumsize that it won't happen.) He just sees A LOT of problems around uncircumsized men.

Now like I said, this is our opionion. Please don't debate anything I've said...

Hi V.,
I have a 3 year old son and another due October 1st.. I had my first son circumsized and will have my 2nd done also.. I just felt that it would be harder to clean the uncircumsized area- each time they go to the bathroom and you wash them you want to make sure you pull on the skin so there isn't any wetness left behind. Plus I had a friend who didn't circumsize her son and at 3 years old she was debating it because her son was having a lot of urinary tract infections.. Which is something I've heard you don't hear a lot about.. The Dr. told her it may be because he was never circumsized and the area wasn't getting cleaned properly. --On another note.. it never occured to me, or my husband for that matter, to circumsize our son just because the dad was.. I guess that does matter to some people.. It just didn't to us- we just thought that it would be cleaner and maybe safer in the long run.. atleast if you do it as an infant he won't remember.. I've heard of men having problems later in life and needing it done.. That's a scary thought!! Cause when you're older you definately remember that pain!- My husband and I did feel really bad seeing the area after the procedure and my son didn't pee for awhile after and when he finally had to go he did cry- but I think it was for the best. -I hope this helps you out! Congratulations and blessings to your new bundle of joy!!
-M.

You are the Mom. You know best. I have two boys that are complete and uncut. My husband I both agreed on this one and we're happy with our decision. There were so many factors we considered but bottom line we figured that for the most part, you can do later, but you really cannot undo later.

Wishing you all the best and congratulations on your soon to be.

C. :)

C. P.
San Jose City Coordinator
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Hi V. we didn't circumcise our son. I spoke with my doctor about it and she was saying it basically comes down to religion these days. I did alot of research and couldn't find any reason to go through with it. My husband isn't circumcised so we felt this was our best decision and i'm very happy with it.

If I had it to do all over again, I would not have had my son circumcised. I can't go back and change it but I won't be doing it if I have sons in the future. Do your research before choosing. Look on forums at mothering.com for lots of moms who have not and I'm sure there will be a ton of links to info on the case against circumcism.

HI V.. I have two girls so never had to face this one in real life. But had we had boys we would have elected not to circumsize. it's not necessary for health, we had no cultural or religious reason to do it, and liek you, i had a tough time with the idea of inflicting a wound on my newborn. Some families do it because they want the little boy to "look like" the dad, and i guess you have to consider whether it would ever become an issue with your boys that you circ'd one and not the other. There are those who claim sexual sensitivity is reduced in circumsized men though i have yet to meet a man circumsized or not who spends a lot of time wishing he were the other way, kwim? anyway, this is one of those decisions that feels huge but in the end it's unlikely to matter which path you chose... so try not to stress over it nd once you decide, don't look back. there is a lot of predjudice on both sides of this issue, and it's one of many procedures that is mainstream for no particular reason other than fashion (there are surprising numbers of medical "fads" and they die hard) and the reality is, men of both "persuasions" live full and happy lives all over the world. if you're uncomfortable with circumsizing, skip it!

Wishing you luck.

I could not find any reason to circumcize either, as a result none of my three boys has been circumsized.

Valerie,
In reading the other responses on how not circumsizing isn't as "clean" as being circumsized I felt it was necessary to say its all about education. I have a son that just turned 2 and he is not circumsized. After all they go through in the hospital after birth my husband and I decided he had been poked and proded enough. When the time comes to show him how to clean it's all about EDUCATION. There are a huge amounts of boys now that are not cut. That was one of my worries about not having him done. I didn't want to have other kids make fun of him when it came to taking showers after gym class. But when it comes down to it, it's all about ignorance. When my baby gets to that stage in life we will explain to him the decision that we made... why we made that decision and he is no different than any body else no matter what they look like.
Hope this helps.

I didn't circumcize my sone (now 16 mos). My concern was that he might be self-conscious because I thought it was uncommon in the US. From the research I've done, these days it is not as uncommom. More parents are electing not to do so than in the past. According to my pediatrician, it's a personal choice, not a medical one. My husband (who is French) is not circumcized and has never had any issues because of that. People I talk to seem to be basing their decision on either their religious practices or wanting the child to "look like daddy." I, too, didn't want to put my son throught that for seemingly no good reason, but it really is a personal decision. I chose to go with my gut and I don't regret it. Hope this helps.
N.

Dear V.,

No, you don't have to have him circumsized. Just teach him how to pull the skin back to clean himself. I understand that the sexual pleasure will be enhanced for him without circumsicion. I agree with you about not wanting to hurt your son, but I had my son circumsized, so I don't know what is right. Go on www.drgreene.com and see if they have any advice. C. N.

I circumcised my first born son, and regret it too. I would follow your heart. Sounds like you have already made up your mind.

I have actually heard of a couple of stories where there were issues with the proceedure and they had to sedate the baby and the baby died from the sedation. Why chance it. Nature made him that way for a reason. I will not be circumcising my next son, and my husband does not agree with me. I will just put my foot down. Good luck!

I didn't circumcise either of my sons simply because I could not find any medical reason to go through with it. My sons are now 12 and 11 and we have NEVER had a problem. The doctors will show you how to clean it and there are no worries...

hi V.

Im a mother of 5 children 2 daughters and 3 boy's
I never got my boy's circumcise I don't bellive in it
my boy's are 20 19 and 17 and had no problem what so ever
growing up even in school, nothing So what I would do is follow your heart I did and it came out perfect

E.

I know that you've had a lot of responses, but I wanted to add one more. I did circumsize both of my sons and will do it again if I have any more boys. There is some recent medical research (I believe that it was done in Europe) that as adults, uncircumsized men have a higher risk of getting STD's compared to circumsized men. Plus I have a couple of doctors in my extended family and they all have said that they are seeing a noticable increase in the number of grown men who are choosing to get circumsized because of medical and in some cases asthetic issues. One more thing that I think you should consider is that if you don't circumsize your baby, your two boys will look different, while this isn't a huge problem, you will have to explain to them why in the future. I hope that all the advice you've been given helps you decide. In the end it's your choice and don't let anyone make you feel bad for whatever choice you make!

It is hard to watch your child go thru pain, it was hard for me to see my baby get her ears peirced and to get her shots but it only hurt for a min then she was ok. My lil girl is strong and healthy, and im sure your kids are also. Circumcision is an important part in a boys life, because it gets dirty down there easier and can cause an infection, its your choice but he would appreciat it in the long run. I dont know if you have seen an uncircumcised one but with a mans ego, im sure he would want that.
Ps i hope i din't offened anyone.

Valerie, my girlfriend's husband just had to be circumsized at 35 years old because of all the infections he was getting. He said he wishes his mom had him circumsized when he couldn't remember. I have 2 sons and I left the decision to my husband since I don't have one of those. My son wants to be and look just like his dad....in every way!