Hello Ladies- I will be having a baby boy on June 3rd and as that date gets closer I am getting more anxious/emotional about how to best include my 4 year old daughter on the due date and beyond. I want this to be a great experience for her too. What suggestions do you have for the day of the c-section and what "big sibling" gifts have you given that have been a big hit. Any advice you guys have for me would be appreciated.
Thanks so much
S.
Going from 1 to 2 ...can't wait but really nervous too.
We got a baby doll for my daughter. We had a little boy so we had to really search for a gender neutral doll that would be similar to baby brother. It was Christmas time, so it may have gotten overshadowed by all of the other gifts:)
When we had our son we made our daughter a shirt that said Big Sister. (Super easy, it was an iron on from any craft store and your favorite Tshirt) She wore it the day we brought him home from the hospital, she was so proud! Congrats!
I have three boys but when we were expecting number 2 child our oldest then 4 also took a big sibling class and he was so proud and learned about what to expect when his baby brother arrived. We also took him shopping and he picked out some gifts for his baby brother. At the baby shower we put a sign at the door that read "please visit big brother Mason during the shower" and asked a few close friends to bring him a gift too. We had a celebrate being a big brother dinner and really doted on him. Also, lastly what helped was this advice I got from friends....unless baby was hungry, hurt or poopy chose big brother first because if he notices baby taking all my attention in a matter of seconds they will lash out with hurt feelings and jealousy. Before I nursed I always read big brother a book and sometimes baby would cry but babies cry and that's ok. Oh and you can get a big gift from the baby to your daughter that is for her only and maybe attach a card that reads "when I am old enough will you teach me...or help me..." to make her feel special and big, like she has a job to do.
We didn't really give my daughter anything, but we did read lots of "big sister" books. There are tons out there and she really enjoys reading them, even still now, one year after the baby was born. I don't think you need to give a gift as much as you need to make her feel like she's still just as important as she ever was and that she is a part of the whole process. My daughter loves to help with everything. Read to her about the baby, get family members and Dad to spend extra time with her, and most importantly, keep doing the same things with her that you did before the baby.
My oldest, also a girl, was 4 when we had #2 (also a c-section!). With her it wasn't about receiving a gift, it was more about not feeling left out. So I learned real quick to involve her and make her feel like she was contributing. The best gift was to make her feel proud to be a big sister. Ask your daughter to get things for you (since you won't be moving very well those first 2-3 weeks!), such as diapers, burping cloths, etc. Let her help give the baby a bath and let her hold her little brother. When he's sleeping, ask her to check on him. It gives them such a sense of importance and empowerment!
And when you're feeling up to it, be sure to squeeze in a few private, non-baby related moments with just her (not always easy!). We had a swing set in the back yard so when the baby was sleeping we would go on the swing set or play in the sand/dirt. Even if it's just 15-20 minutes, she will be happy and realize that there will still be "mommy and me" time. Or she can help you with the laundry (I used to think that doing chores wasn't "real" time with my child but have learned through experience that they really are happy to just be doing something with you!).
The Leapster is a good idea, too . . . my 4 year old loves hers! And it's always good for children to know how to self-entertain. Does she like playing doctor? Does she have a play doctor's kit? That's always a good one, too . . . and then she can give you and the baby check-ups.
Congrats and enjoy your growing family!
My babies are 4 yrs apart! I love how independent the older one is, it makes things so much easier than having two small ones, or two in diapers!!
I gave my son his baby book/scrapbook and talked to him about him being a baby.
He also got his Leapster at that time. I think we told him it was from the baby. Itwas something he could do and play with quietly while baby and I napped or if I was nursing. That was the best thing ever!!
Congratulations on your newest addition!!!!
We just went through this last year, so I can share. What we did went super! Before the baby was born with c-section, I took big sis to the store and she picked out a lovey to give to the baby, wrapped it herself and she brought it (with Grandpa) to the hospital when she came to meet the baby. We put it in the hospital bassinette with the baby.
When she and Grandpa arrived, the "baby" surprised her with a BIG muffin for the new BIG sister, and a wrapped gift too. Hers was a princess dress-up dress, but you can choose something that would mean a lot to your daughter. Grandpa took pics of the whole gift exchange.
