My son is 29 months old, he did not speak very much when he started speech therapy maybe 10 words. He is being getting speech and special education since 2 and half months and the improvement have been tremendous, he has started to say 3 words together like, what is that? catch the ball,pick it up, his vocabulary has increased a lot also, he greets people in the store hi and Bye! loves to play with kids any age, knows the whole alphabet,identifies letters,knows the shapes and counts from one to ten,he likes pretend play, is not scared of people or strange and new environments, he is very friendly,he is learning commands very quickly, loves animals, nature, books, trucks, trains,flowers and plants, cartoons (he said Callou) loves Brainy baby and now says almost all the objects in the video so we are very happy! and thank God for it! the only thing is that sometimes he forgets when we ask him for a word but I think he is learning so many new things that he is processing lots of new things. His speech therapist tells me he is supposed to know right away when I ask him an object or body part and that I have to take him to a developmental pediatrician because that is not normal. The the OT who is assigned to his came for the first time last week(an OT evaluation was already done) and started saying many negative things about him because he was running, laughing and playing like a normal 2 year old in the room,(he knows how to properly play with the toys and their function and stays with the toy and plays if he is interested) she said he is supposed to stay focus in one thing only and not running, laughing and going trough toys (when he is interested in a book or something he sits down is not like he never sits down, the OT says that he needs lots of therapy and that he will eventually cope with this? after that first time I broke down in front of her and she said we will see what happened and she said she will call me that night to set an schedule and she never did, then she just showed up this Monday without checking the schedule and calling me first?
My father is a surgeon and family Doctor with 41 years of medical experience where he is seen many many children and who recently came to visit and stayed here and observed him for 3 weeks straight told me he was a perfectly normal 29 month old boy who is active and healthy and in his professional opinion needs speech therapy and that he will be fine!And all kids develop their Mental and psychomotor development at different times, I just don't understand, he is doing so well in speech and because he is active and sometimes he forgets or does not answer fast enough the therapists make me worry about my son so much and make me feel like there is something wrong with him. Now I am crying and worrying after they told me that. I have not sleep well for days. He has good eye contact and likes to look at people in the eye when he talks, I want to know if I am jut being too worried? Can someone tell me about their experiences? Are the therapists supposed to be objective but also very positive too? My heart tells me to follow my father's advice and not to worry, thanks for the feedback!
It seems to me that you're son is a normal active little boy. You shouldn't compare him with other kids his age, remember they all develop differently. If you are really worried than maybe you should go to a different OT and get a second opinion.
Hi A.,
I am also a speech langyuage pathologist and agree with Robyn. The good news is that you are receiving services, Sometimes it gets tough to understand all the competing recommendations from different professionals. I agree that going to a developmental pediatrician would be helpful so they can oversee these different disciplines.
On my website I have lots of suggestions and information on speech and language development and delay: http://www.playonwords.com
Good luck!
S. Artemenko
Hi A.
First I will say that I am old, and second I will say that I am not an authority. My advice however is this: just as if you were in the hospital and the aid or even the nurse said "you need your appendix out, you would not go and get it done without checking with a surgeon, would you?" Therapists are not the be all and end all. Sometimes they can steer you into asking questions, but ultimately they are only giving opinion.
Your dad however has a vested interest and would not want you to delay treatment he thought necessary. Sometimes things are not the norm, but still within normal range.
None of mine had speech issues, but I worked special needs and they used to say no child has a speech issue til they turn 3 and don't put those simple sentences together. Sounds like your son is doing that, and the intervention you got for him has helped, Praise God!!!
Our oldest didn't walk til 14 months, not a step. He is a college coach. Our youngest didn't pick her head up off the floor when you laid her on her belly til 10 months old. MD said she was fine, when I was worried. Today she is a college sophomore, I guess, as she took her last freshman final yesterday. By the way, she's on the president's list. Our younger son was so hyperactive they wanted him medicated. We refused, thinking he was a very active child. He is a lawyer for the gov. writing big time contracts, married & great new dad. Our older daughter got so wrapped up in her art that she would not eat, drink or sleep til the project was complete. Today she is finishing her first year as a fine arts major. The professors are amazed at her work, and is sometimes in trouble physically because she doesn't eat or sleep. Are we surprised, no, she has been doing it since we gave her her first lump of playdough at 18 mo. We just got a letter from the college that she is getting an art scholarship. that has never been given to a freshman before. She's on the dean's list, hoping for President's List this semester.
All kids have issues. It is when those issues upset their daily routine that you seek intervention. Sounds like you have done that probably on the advice of your ped., go back to him and ask if any further intervention is necessary. Of course, let him know what you think, and what your dad said, and maybe you would want to include what the others have said so that you can have the ped. evaluate specifically for that. God gives mom's wisdom for their children. If you thought it was a problem, God would help you seek advice even if it was difficult.
God bless you and give you His wisdom.
"If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him." James 1:4
I did. He did. Mine are fine and yours will be too.
K. SAHM married 38 years --- adult children --- 37,33, and twins 18 finishing first year of college after homeschooling.
A.,
Listen to your father and not the therapist. Fire her, get someone else, better yet start him with only a Speech Therapist and say get out of here to the OT, she is looking for trouble where their isn't any. Ask her where she got her medical degree and then when she tells you she doesn't have one then tell her to keep her comments to herself and threaten her with a malpractice lawsuit. She is lucky I am not there with you, I would give that woman a piece of my Italian mind and knock her down many notches. I have been in your shoes and know exactly what you are going through. I found that I did a lot more than the OT did and that they are just trying to keep the money in their pocket.
Hugs,
T.
What does your gut tell you? Mother usually knows best.
Sounds to me like he is perfectly normal. Personally,
in todays world, I think if a doc thinks that there may
be a tiny tiny problem they refer you out. We live in a
"CYA" (cover your a--) world. Everyone is worried about
being sued. Speech thereapy sounds like it is a great
thing. Hope this helps. Good luck and enjoy your son.
Hi A.,
If it makes you feel better, contact another OT and another Speech therapist for a second opinion. To me, it sounds like he is normal, and if your father who is in the medical field told you the same... I do not think you should be worrying.
Getting a second opinion is always best in these cases.
Good luck!
I don't have any experience with OT but my initial reaction is amazement and horror at what that person says. I'd go with your dad's impression on your son and not believe what the OT says about your son's behavior. Your OT is human and can be wrong, despite their training. In fact, just because a person has an education and a license doesn't mean they are "good." Your son sounds perfectly normal to me. I have a 24 month old and a 4 year old. My 24 month old is very spirited and doesn't like to listen or sit still, and I'm not worried in the least bit. So don't worry. Is there any way you can get a different OT, one who doesn't feel the need to correct normal, age appropriate behavior?
Here we go again with the "professionals" wanting all kids to fit the mold. It sounds like the the speech person (I will not use the word therapist) doesnt like your son very much and I would absolutely change people or just let him be a baby. Boys talk slower than girls and your baby isnt that far behind IMO. If you are concerned take him to a park and see how he measures up with other kids his age. He might be a bit delayed, but its really too soon to tell. Why has he been getting services since he was an infant? Was he premature? He sounds like a normal toddler to me and I think you should stop worrying and listen to dad.My grand daughter is 33 months old and just started talking in sentences. BAM all of a sudden she went from pointing and babbling one word to complex sentences "I want apple juice please." almost overnight. Check out this link.
http://www.pbs.org/parents/childdevelopmenttracker/two/in...
Hi There,
I am responding because I am a Pediatric Occupational Therapist. First of all, I hope you do not turn yourself off to all therapists. There are many wonderful, well educated, qualified specialists who are working in the best interest of you and your child. The first thing a good therapist should do is explain to you (the parent) their findings through their observations of the child in their natural environment, as well as through standardized testing. Their job is to help your child by making adaptations where needed, and finding ways to help your child succeed to his or her potential, not to scare you by saying "he needs all this therapy" without giving an explaination that you understand and agree with. Has she explained to you what your child is having trouble with? If she is concerned that he has trouble focusing, does she thing she has sensory processing difficulties? Has she explained what this is and how she plans on addressing it?? She probably feels that if he is not able to focus, this will his affect his ability to learn skills as he gets older. If you do not agree with or understand her findings, ask more questions... maybe ask if there is another more experienced OT to take your case. Also, no disrespect to your father... he is probably a brilliant man. However, he is not a child development specialist. Therapist are trained to understand child development, and how to help a child develop to his or her potential. Not all children with Developmental Delays have a "Medical Diagnosis" which can be detected by a doctor. I find it extremely ignorant of one of the responders to degrade Therapists by implying that because we don't have a medical degree we don't know what we are talking about. Not to toot my own horn, or that of other therapists, but many parents have thanked me and my and colleagues about the positive affect we have had on their child's life. If you feel confused about your therapists opinion, please ask more questions, and possibly find another OT.... you may be pleasantly surprised with the results that OT may have for your child.
Good Luck.... I wish you the best, and if you have more questions, please feel free to contact me.
A., let me just say this..., If I pointed to something and asked you to tell me what it is in a split second and kept asking you things, how many times would you have to pause to think of the word? It all sounds normal to me. If I were you(or in this position) I would stop everything right now (Take a Break) and see how it goes for a while. That would give you more sleep and a little less stress(for a moment). I wish someone in my family was a doc so I could get advise, sometimes dad's know best! If you don't want to stop speech all together then find out some games that you can do at home with him and stretch your appointments out. Good Luck and try to stop stressing(easier said and than done). LOL! HE IS ONLY 2!
S.
Hi A.!
I am sorry you are having a difficult time with this. I cannot give you my profesional opinion without having observed your son or read the therapist's reports. But I can give you some advice as how to proceed.
First of all, take your son to his pediatrician (if s/he is someoe you trust) for observation and show the dr. the speech/ot reports and share your father's professional opinion & your observations as well.
Also you need to know that sometimes therapists do not always have the child's best interest at heart. They think they do, but they may not. There are good ones and not so goods ones and the more children that receive services the more work they are secured.
Also consider that there are many good therapists who are capable of seeing things that an untrained eye may not see. I cannot tell you how many students of mine I have had to fight the parents on to get tested for various things. As an educator, I can see things many people cannot.
I used to live in Orange county, Pine Bush, and was a teacher in Warwick. I drove through Florida daily! :) The pediatrician that I took my children to was Hudson Valley Pediatrics in Middletown. I highly recommend Dr. Altura, Dr. Baker and Dr. Lynch. If you do not completely trust your current pediatrician, try one of the above. But please know that i do not trust every dr. in that practice so if you need to ask me about another dr. there, please do.
Now, if your son does need services, that is ok too. Speech and language services are very common and when a child truly needs it, it can be wonderful. If he does need more ot that is ok too. But services should not be solely determined on whether or not he can label body parts. And yes, 2 year old boys should be running around like crazy, but there is a fine line that only a truly good professional can decide whether it is typical behavior or not.
I am sorry if this response seems so unorganized, my 3 year old & 5 year old sons are running around the house yelling at the top of their lungs like maniacs and I cannot think straight...but that is typical! Also, my 3 year old thinks his elbow is on the back of his knee...problem? Not at all...cute? ABSOLUTELY! My best to you.
Hi A.,
Sorry for the late reply. I am so sorry for what you are going through. I am a speech language pathologist who works for early intervention. I also have 4 children and 3 of them have received some sort of therapy. I have had therapists come into my home, taken my children to clinics and have had the experience of having one child in a special education preschool program. I have observed and learned a lot from these people - both good and bad. I am a different therapist now than before I had my kids. Since I am experienced in both sides, PLEASE feel free to contact me to discuss this further.
If not, I would discuss this matter with your pediatrician and make an appointment with a developmental pediatrician. It takes a few months to get an appointment and you can always cancel it if you change your mind. The specialist will guide you, you will know for sure if there is anything else going on and you will be able to sleep at night.
I would also get his hearing checked if you have not already done this. This is just rule things out. It takes about a half hour and does not hurt the baby.
A. listen to your heart! Your child is a perfectly normal and happy healthy boy! Stop worrying and enjoy him and his progress! You are the mother not the therapists or OT's.They may be a little too much sometimes. Just keep up with your little one!
Ask for another therapist to come and evaluate him. Then go from there,your son and the therapist may have a personality conflict. Which is okay, just find someone else!
wow you just scared me. i cannot get my almost 5 year olds to focus on something most of the time. for sure, i am not taking them to be evaluated. speech is important and i recommend you continue with that. for everything else, consult your pediatrician. start there. if you don't like one therapist, switch. they're supposed to help you also cope with whatever lies ahead. not to burst your bubble.
one of my girls has had problems (hearing)(, but I have never ever dealt with any therapists, specialist or whatever that hasn't been positive even when I had trouble seeing the light. had I had to deal with someone who would intensify my negative feelings or hopelessness I would have for sure switched.
good luck in getting your two year old focused. :) and let me know how you do it, maybe I'll apply to my 5 year olds.
and, like you said, he's learning a lot of words right now, his brain needs to process them, in meantime, give him time to think of the correct word when you ask him something. i am not a specialist or a doctor for that matter. But I am a mom, and my mom feeling says listen to your dad, and also always discuss everything with the pediatrician. take it from there
good luck, and start sleeping
You know your child best and if the therapist makes you uncomfortable for any reason, switch.
When my son, who did not need OT/PT or speech support, cannot remember a word, he gets frustrated. At 5 his vocabulary is still building. If he shows frustration, like crying or whining or stamping his foot, we'll ask if he needs help with the words. We ask him to describe the idea he's trying to convey, color, size, related words and concepts, where did it happen, etc. So at 2 and 1/2, your son sounds to me, a layman with no training whatsoever except my parenting skills and exposure to my children's friends, perfectly normal. Maybe he delays in responding and pointing to body parts because the therapist is as annoying to him as they are to you! Like ,"why is she asking me that again? I already showed her!"
Oh and as far as active, we saved many toys from my older daughter for my son to play with. Many are now broken-he's tough on toys, always curious to see the limits of a toy, what other uses it has. People keep telling me "he's a boy". Doesn't stop me from guiding him on proper care and usage anyway!
find another therapist with a clue.
your child is fine.
u know it.
you family and friends know it.
honestly he probably doesnt even need anymore speech thereapy...he's 2! worry about it when he's 3 or so, if its even a concern by then.
he's perfect. dont let people get you all anxious and dont get performance anxiety for a 2yr old.
trust your instincts mom...they are NEVER wrong.
A.,
I am so glad you wrote in about this problem. My son had delayed speech and I had got help for him about the same time you did. He did not speak until late, which scared us. He had trouble speaking. They came to the house, did and assessment. I went to a pre-school language program at the school at 3-4yrs old, which was helpful. He is 9 now and still gets a little language/comprehension help from a special teacher at the school (she is very cheerful and helpful). He is a normal, healthy 9-yr old with a flourishing imagination and A LOT of energy.
Now let me tell you I did get the feeling that if there were not a certain number of students in the program, the program (and the school) looses state funding, and they may lose their jobs. You need to be careful of programs offered by the state (or at public schools). They tend to OVERANALYZE every little problem. Pay close attention to the assessments, and verbalize/write any disagreements you may have with their assessments. When my son got old enough to understand that school GRADES you on your verbal/writing skills, he put more effort into 'getting it right'. Right now, just have fun teaching him to read/speak!! E-mail me back if you would like to speak more.........
Let me guess...and they happen to know someone they can refer you to...I swear its a money thing. Some of these doctors say this and that is wrong w/ your child knowing full well you will spend the money to get it done if its good for them. Get another opinion and do NOT tell the new therpist the others. Start fresh. Personally, I thought most 2 year olds are supposed to be "running, laughing and playing". I know my son did and he is now 10 and is fine. So what are they talking about? I have never seen a 2 yr old completely focused and will answer you on the first try. You know your son. If your still worried, get a second opinion. And dont be shy about it. Tell them. Maybe that will wake them up to being more positive and encouraging about your son..
Hey A.- my son receives speech and I am an OT and it sounds like you may want to look into switching therapists since they are supposed to be there to support you and offer guidance while working with your son. You can also wait and see what happens at preschool next year- if his focus is out of the ordinary his teacher will let you know. We used a developmental pediatrician out of Latham that was great and not quick to label(my son was born premature so we follow them as a precaution). Good luck!
Dear A.,
I'm so sorry that you are troubled over this. We worry so much about our children, don't we? I have 4 children. My oldest son, now 15, had a slight speech delay, much like your son. My yougest, now 4, has a speech delay and has various other developmental problems, so between the two of them I may be able to respond to your concern.
First of all, without seeing your son, it is hard to tell, but I would lean toward your father's advice, and also, we don't need to seek perfection for our children. There will alway be something they are a little differnt with, or not good at, or need extra help in, etc. It doesn't need to mean that there is something terribly wrong.
I hope that I don't insult any OTs or PTs that may be reading this, but I found the Early Intervention wanted lable my youngest son with autism early on and get him into the program. They wanted to find anything. Plus the school system gets more funds for each child. Thank God I did not listen, b/c he is not autistic. When we were doing early intervention, after they would leave I would be in tears. I would call my husband and he said we had to find something else. It was just too negative.
On the other hand, my oldest son who had a speech delay, I settled for the school systems speech and basic skills. He really did not need much, but stiil the program was not satisfactory and he has a LITTLE trouble with reading on grade level. He's going to be just fine in life, but I do wish I had the kind of therapy for my oldest that my youngest has. I'll explain more later.
If you do decide to take your son to a developmental pediatrian, I don't believe that will be any help at all. They will find something wrong and give him a lable. That's there job--to find something wrong. He will always have that lable.
My preference, and this has been blessing to our children, is to have a neurodevelopmental evaluation. These neurodevelpmentalist evaluate the child and look for the root cause of the behavior the child is exibiting, then they work on "fixing" the root cause. You can find an ND here at www.ican-do.org. We travel quiet far to see our ND.
I would also take some time to listen to this doctor's lecture. It's long, but it will be the single best thing you will do for your son. (I think the actual lecture starts about 30 minutes into the recording)
WAPF2007 GAPS part1 6203.mp3
http://www.mediafire.com/?sufwdtyjymn
WAPF2007 GAPS part2 6219.mp3
http://www.mediafire.com/?z43u1mmtmn7
Look to the GAPS diet to clean up your son's diet, so that the brain has all it needs to develop. This is important for every child, not just because the OT sees something wrong. (www.gapsdiet.com and www.gaps.me). This has given my son much more focus and his speech has improved dramatically. Oh--also, very important, I almost forgot. There is a wonderful doctor who helps children who are "late talkers." His name is Dr. James MacDonald. You can look at his site www.jamesdmacdonald.org. We are using his method instead of EI or school system.
One more thing, get rid of any toxic household or personal products. This is the easiest thing you can do and you can look at my site if you like or ask me more about anything I wrote about here. I would love to be a support to you. I'm sorry if I gave you too much information. Take some time to wade through it and let me know if you have any questions.
May God bless you and your son,
T. E.
www.LiveWellShopSmart.com
A.,
Honestly from the beginning of your post I was thinking, why is he getting special therapy? I had so many people tell me the same thing about my oldest when he was 2. He didn't say enough. He was hard to understand. He was 2!!! We ignored it and figured he did everything "later" than most seemed to think he should have but eventually he DID do them in HIS time so we agreed we were just going to watch him a bit longer. Eventually he began talking more and became easier to understand but it wasn't until he was almost 3 I'd say. Now at 8 1/2 he is still our bright boy who does amazing in school and on the soccer field. :)
I would listen to your dad. Let him be a toddler! At 5 my oldest and even now my middle son who actually is 5 at the moment are all a bit unfocused. They just want to play! My middle is in all day kindergarten and it drives him crazy! He wants to play and run around...not sit still all day and do projects.
Personally I would keep working with him myself and tell the OT person thank you but no thank you. Your son sounds perfectly normal to me.
A., trust your father's advice. No 2 1/2 year old boy sits still. My 3 1/2 yr old nephew still doesn't sit still. As a matter of fact my 6 yr old nephew and my 1 yr old son don't sit still. Boys, unfortunately just don't sit still, lol. They are little wrecking balls with feet and that's how God made them. As a matter of fact, I call my son Trouble Boy. Your son sounds perfectly healthy and I would A) call your pediatrician and ask him what he thinks and B) trust your father's advice as he is a doctor and follow your heart. I promise you everything will be fine. :) Talk to you soon!
A.,
My gut instinct says to listen to your Dad, his years of experience are on his side. Plus what you are describing sounds like a normal 2 year old to me. However, if you are still worried, it does not hurt to see the developmental specialists. They may say to you...there is nothing wrong, no need to worry. OR they may have some good suggestions to help your son with his learning. My neice has a sensory integration disorder. The years of speech, OT and PT have helped her alot, people outside our family and her teachers are not aware of her special needs - to other kids there is nothing different about her. Good luck!
I just want to say to you PLEASE,PLEASE listen to your father and follow your heart.You and your heart know your son better than everyone else.Reading your story I went back 6 years ago.My son was two.I still cray when I remember his 2 and birthday .Be happy having a active and healthy two years old boy.Thank God every day for that.I'm telling you this because I almost got sick myself and it was dhe most hardest time in my life until I made the best decision in my life and one day I canceld the speech therapy and I listen to the exellent teacher ,telling me; your son only need's to be with other kids'. My story is very long and sad and I dont like to think aboute that but your writing touched my heart and I'll tell you aboute my son today./He was the same very ,very active ,running,laughing, at the park he got the name 100% a boy,at the library busy boy,with a few words./ Today my son is a 2and grade student.He is an exellent student ,student of the month,he just earned a place in the first annual East Quogue math bee,and in hope I'll help you I'll write his teacher's comment from his last reaport card;He works beautifully each day in class.He is excelling in all areas and continues to come to school aech and every day displaying all the attributes of e fine student .He is progressing as a reader,writerand a mathemstician.He displays all the qualities of a model citizen!Keep up the fine work!I am very ,very proud of you!!Today I'm Mom of two ,my son is 8 and my doughter is 5 and I tray every day to thank God for making me Mommy and I'll tell you what I'm doing for Mother's Day/I got a exellent poem from my son/This Mother's Day we just pased was the fourth one I'm taking my kids out for launch ,than to bay a present for tham ,telling :"Thank you, this is our day" Good luck and and don't bee to worried.The time will show you and I hope proof you nothing is wrong with him.
Why did you start speech and OT? As a parent of a multiply handicapped child who has had therapies since 5 mo old I have founf that each therapist thinks their specialty is the most importatnt. Dont stress, Yes, follow your fathers advice, Dont be bullied by therapists. Sometimes their ego is bigger than their skill,
Nothing in the world is more confusing as to what advice to take regarding development. I have an almost 5 year old who has had similar issues. Turned out he did have some issues that could have been worked on sooner if I had ignored them all and followed my gut. I got so much differing advice - so I have one thing to tell you - take him to a developmental pediatrician. The appt will take a while to get - we waited almost 9 months to be seen. They will give you peace of mind - one way or another. Good Luck.
Dear A.,
I can totally understand you and I know exactly how you feel. My son was in a similar situation six years ago, he is now 8 years old. However, in my situation, unfortunately, after taking him to a developmental pediatrician, he was diagnosed with PDD-NOS (Pervasive Developmental Disorder - not otherwise specified), which is an autism spectrum disorder. In your case, from what you are saying that he is very social, he likes to play with a lot of toys and other children, it doesn't sound like you need to worry about it, however, just for a peace of mind, I would take him for an evaluation anyway, so that you can hear it from a specialist, that he just has a speech delay or whatever the case may be. It doesn't hurt to take him for an evaluation....If your son is developing like he should, there is nothing to fear. However, if there is a diagnosis for his case, it is better to have it sooner rather than later, so that you can receive more appropriate services from early intervention and later on, from the school system. Usually it takes several months to get an appointment with a good developmental pediatrician, so if I were you, I would make an appt anyway and if you notice that he is making strides and progressing steadily, you can always cancel the appointment. In the meantime, it is better to be on the safe side. There are a few things you can do while you wait to have the evaluation done. You can actively observe him while he is playing. For example, you say your son is playing with a lot of toys, but is he playing with them appropriately, using the function of the toy as it was intended to be? For example, is he playing with a toy car making "vroom vroom" and making the car go back and forth, or is he just spinning the wheels to watch them just spin? Do you see him engaging in any self-stimulatory behaviors, such as flapping hands, running in circles, or lining up toys, or spinning toys for a long period of time, longer than normal? As far as language, is he using the words he is learning appropriately or out of context? These are some things that would give you a hint that he might have a developmental delay or a similar disorder.
A., I can tell you that for me, it has been a long road, but with so many treatments available today, including but not limited to ABA, speech, OT, and a wide range of biomedical therapies, my son has made tremendous strides and he is on his way to recovery. The resources available today were not as widely available years ago. Life has taken my family to a different direction. Things my husband and I had originally planned for our family had to take a step back and we had to concentrate on giving our son everything we had and could do for him to make him as independent as possible and to learn how to be part of society. With a lot of faith and had work I can tell you we will get there. There are several DAN! (Defeat Autism Now) doctors throughout the country treating these kids, and a lot of them are recovering. I know recovery is not guaranteed, but all we can do is try and give him a chance. If you get a similar diagnosis and if they tell you it is a life long, no treatment, no cure, kind of disorder, please DO NOT BELIEVE THEM! There is treatment available and thousands of children are recovering.
In the meantime, there is no need to worry. You can cross that bridge if and when you get there. My advice is for you to make an appointment with a developmental pediatrician and have an evaluation performed for your "peace of mind". At least if the doctor tells you he is fine, then you know for sure the therapists were overreacting. However, don't ignore their concerns....they work with a lot of children and they usually can see the signs.
I wish you the best to you and your family!
E. P.
Just so you know right off, I am by no means an expert and do not wish to come off like one, but I have worked with Special Ed students for the past 11 years as a teacher and later as an advocate, some of the students were adolescents, some pre school. I also have my own two year old. This is why your post was so heartbreaking! It doesn't sound to me that these people really know what they are talking about! Either that or my 2 year old has the same issues! I think at this age they are not supposed to focus for very long- even kindergarteners only spend 20 minutes or so on a certain lesson, they just don't have the attention span. And putting three words together to form a sentence is actually quite good for a child who is not even three years old. I just want to say please do not worry- look for a second opinion and if you do trust the pediatrician you have right now, don't be afraid to ask what their opinion is. And don't be afraid to trust your instincts- it sounds like in your heart you don't agree with the assessments that you were given. From what you describe about your son I don't either! So just go with your gut and find other people to work with your son who have more reasonable expectations for what a two year old should be doing (and don't let them tell you he is not normal-we all learn at our own pace.)
Hi. I'm a pediataric OT and have worked in the community for 7 years. I think it would be very important for you to have a conference with the OT/ST tot clarify your thoughts, your Father's opinion, and also their points of view. It is really important to look at the 'whole child' within the context of their environment, as well as the family's ideas and goals for their child. Any professional should have positive comments to say about your child as well as areas of challenge that they observe. Best wishes and I hope you are able to feel that the therapists are teamed with you! R. Qamar
Listen to your own motherly instincts and also to your Dad as well. You both know you son/Grandson better than anyone else. It sounds like he is a very normal two year old. Both my sons have always been very bright and when I'd ask my older one (at the age of two) a question, he did always answer right away, but my younger son would almost always take a minute to think about what I was asking him before giving me an answer. I learned to give him a time to answer and I was always rewarded with a wonderful, fun and lots of times comical answer from him. He just needed an extra minute to think about his answer, that's all. When he got older and was in the 3rd. grade, at our first parent teacher conference, his teacher told us; "When Connor has something to share with the class..... they ALL listen!" He's just a thoughtfully deep person. No problem. Gotta let the kid be who he is. Best of luck......
D. N.
Dear A.,
I am so sorry, and troubled, to hear about your experiences with these therapists! I don't work in this field, so I may be overstepping my bounds, but this "therapist"'s conduct sounds highly unprofessional to me -- to the point where you might consider reporting her to the appropriate licensing board.
Think about the adults you know: How many people can consistently spit out the right answer to a random question right away? It's much more normal to stop and think. (Or at least I hope so; if not, I personally am in big trouble, LOL.) This is even more the case with toddlers, since their ability to change gears and shift their attention is at an early developmental stage. In fact, given how many little boys are diagnosed with ADD, the fact that your son focuses on what interests him and doesn't shift gears immediately sounds like a really GOOD sign!
I too am the mom of a child who's receiving Early Intervention services. In my experience, they have been more good than bad, but I definitely have encountered (and am encountering) some clueless and insensitive people along the way. Just because someone comes to your house in a professional capacity doesn't mean that person knows more than you do. The parent-child bond is so significant with toddlers that moms do see things professionals don't: young children react so differently to different situations and are developing so fast -- and they have a developmentally appropriate guardedness with strangers -- that you as the mom really ARE the expert when it comes to your son.
SO ... whatever this person's motivations are, I think you need to trust yourself, and your dad, and perhaps get a second opinion. I'm also really glad you posted this question to this board. You shouldn't have to cry and worry alone about this. It sounds like you're a great mom, and your dad sounds like a wonderful doctor and grandpa. Kudos to you both.
I can see u are very concerned. Why not request a second opinion? People are very quick to judge. When my son was 2 year old he was in early intervention for speech delay.I will be honest I was very scared. This program has helped a lot, he is now in 7th grade and has received honors, this is the last year he will be receiving this service because of his big improvement. Trust your instinct. Its not about a labling it is about helping a child understand the concepts..
My heart goes out to you because of your worry! Your child is so young, developmental stages are diffrent for all human beings, sometimes specialits over analyze so do not believe everything you hear from an expert (it is their business) you are becoming now the expert on your child period, if it does not make sense do not go there because time is on your side at this stage I recommend you keep a watchful eye and balance information. I have a friend whos daughter hardly spoke at all before the age of 3 and she is a grown self assured woman now who went to a very good university and became a professional to this day she still does not talk alot (as an adult) and is rather reserved and shy in her personality, so never confuse development with intellect because as children grown they become their own people and do just fine. I think it is a bit too young to start all this serious diagnosis. Keep and eye on your child and keep reading and doing all the things a good parent does with a baby, mainly play is so important as this is their work (not too many videos) but playing outside, doing a music class togehter or listening to music, singing and doing stuff with the child will help the development the most, so play have fun and be happy and help him with speech if you chose but do not push him too hard their little egos devleop early and you want a child that feels good about himself, prasie and love him and watch,(talk to him alot even if he does not talk back) you will learn more when he begins school and address education issues if there are any at that time. I agree with your father (who is a doctor), always go with YOUR gut feeling in regards to your child (You are the expert). Play up to strentghs not weeknesses always look for what he is doing ahead of time (I am sure there are some positives here). Everyone is diffrent and important. It is Not necessary but harmfull to compare kids all the time easpecially this early in life. Oh by the way make sure he has good rest or quiet time Kids need this also as much as up and on the go time. I hope this helps!!
Good luck!
Dear A.,
Listen to the speech therapist! Take your child to a developmental pediatrician. Speech and occupational therapists KNOW what they're talking about. With all due respect to your father, surgeons are NOT developmental pediatricians. In the experience of my cousin, her child's speech delay was only the tip of the iceberg in terms of her daughter's problems. Who were the first ones to make her aware of this? Her daughter's speech and OT.
Get help. Better be safe than sorry.
Good luck!
M.
Having your child evaluated by a Pediatric Developmentalist is certainly not a negative thing and may even be the responsible thing to do for your son as well as for your piece of mind. If there is a developmental issue, having him diagnosed early is a benefit to getting him back on track that much sooner. Please don't let your fear of what "might be" prevent you from getting what may be best for your son. Always keep in mind that ignoring or denying an issue won't make it go away. By the way,family doctors and surgeons are not trained to recognize all developmental issues in children and may therefore not see a "problem" during the younger ages.
First, breathe... congratulations on your son's rapid development! Early Intervention services are phenomenal and are highly dependent on parental follow-through and you are obviously doing a lot for your son!
Therapists who work with young children specialize in child development- surgeons do not (sorry). Your father is not an objective behavioral rater and is not a pediatrician, nor does he work with children. Asking his opinion will make you feel better, but unless he is a pediatric neurosurgeon he likely doesn't have an expertise in child development.
That being said, a therapist's job is to help your son remediate his delays before entering Kindergarten, if possible. It helps if they are positive, but that isn't what they are there to do! If the therapists are recommending additional sessions, that likely means that they think your son is making progress and they would like to further the progress and get him out of special education!
Even at two years old, your son should be able to sit with you or another adult and engage in a table-top adult-directed activity for 10-15 minutes. From what you are saying, it sounds like he can attend to things that interest him, but he's struggling to attend to less interesting and likely challenging activities.
Stay with the therapies. They cannot hurt and the county will not approve them if your son is not in need. This is what I do for a living (Committee on Preschool Special Education) and know that therapists do not generally make comments that don't have a developmental basis.
Good luck and keep in mind that your dad is a grandfather and not objective. He's also not a developmental specialist. I would hold-off on the developmental pediatrician until at LEAST age 3.
**I am adding this having read some responses to your question. I am very surprised to see such outlash against the therapist. Nothing that this individual said to A. warrants a report to the licensing agent. Wow. Step back and think about how difficult it is to sit with a parent and tell them that their child has delays. I do this every day and I cannot tell you how hard it is. Try to have some perspective here. Keep in mind that as parents we are NOT objective evaluators of our children. We love them and see the best in all that they do (including their weaknesses). Early Intervention was approved for this child b/c someone assessed his development as being significantly delayed. Believe me, the counties don't approve just anything.
