2 1/2 Year Old Waking Up

Updated on February 25, 2009
J.D. asks from Buffalo Grove, IL
9 answers

After the first time we let him cry it out at 5 months, my son has always been a great sleeper. He has been in a regular bed since he was 15 months old. He used to go to bed at 7-7:30 every night and didn't get up until we woke him for day care. Now he gets out of bed several times a night or cries if we do not sleep with him. How do we stop this? Do we let him cry it out again? We all need sleep and want to stop this before it becomes a bad habbit. Please help

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S.A.

answers from Chicago on

My second child did that when she was about that age. She was afraid of her closet...so we turned the light on in the closet, put a small nightlight in her room, and then I gave her a little rubber bat to sleep with so she could hit monsters if she saw one. I guess I should not have let her watch Monsters Inc....her older sister loved the movie.

At any rate, that did the trick for a year and half...now she insists on sleeping in the full bed with her sister in her room. Oh well, if they are both happy, I'm happy.

PS The comment that it is common in children that cry it out so early is silly. Five months is old enough to sleep through the night. Most peds will tell you three months. I nursed all my kids and still nursing my son, so I do get up once or twice with him, but I have let him cry it out at times because he is wanting to cuddle every two hours. Mommy is tired and I'm no good as a mommy when I'm tired. It is just a phase and that's all. Not all kids go through it. My first never did and I let her cry it out at about five months or so. My second never did until she watched that silly movie. And we shall see with my son. You didn't do anything wrong letting your son cry it out. But everyone has an opinion right?

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K.C.

answers from Chicago on

What I used to do with both of my boys and my sister did this with my nephew as well...mind you my boys are now 7,9, and my nephew is now 13. We used to use a Lavendar Spray on their beds about a hour before bedtime. It helps them realize and settle into a deep sleep. I know Avon used to have this, but not sure if they still do, but I know it is till out there you'll just have to search around for it. Any kind of linen spray with Lavendar in it will be fine. I hope this will work like it did on our boys.

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M.B.

answers from Springfield on

Hi J.,
We went through this with my daughter. We never really figured out why she was getting up but we did just keep putting her back in bed. When she cried that she wanted my husband or I we just told her we loved her but she had to sleep in her bed. After a few days she stopped.

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N.P.

answers from Chicago on

eliminate milk from his diet

back in 2001 there was a study published that said that the majority of preschool night time wakings and sleep problems was really caused by hidden milk allergies and that was the only symptom.

I ignored the study despite Tara not sleeping through the night yet. Spring of 03 someone mentioned it to me again, Tara was almost 4 and I had tried EVERY single method to get her to sleep through the night and it wasn't working. And it wasn't just waking once or three times, it was from 6 to 20 times every single night. So, out of desperation I took milk out of her diet. After 5 days she started sleeping through the night. 6 nights of sleeping solidly and I decided to test the theory and overloaded her with milk. Gave her ice cream, yogurt, cheese, milk, you name it. She was up 6 times that night. No more milk products and she was back to sleeping solidly.

Can't hurt to try it for 2 wks.

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M.R.

answers from Chicago on

Barring an illness or other serious issue that requires your attention...

Just keep walking him back to bed. Be as quiet and unemotional as possible. Tuck him back in with a simple "good night, see you in the morning", and off you go. Do not make this a big production otherwise he'll be waking up more often just to get the 'show'.

Rinse and repeat...tons of times if you need to.

If he gets up at 3 in the morning, back he goes. If he gets up at 3:30 in the morning, back he goes. If he gets up at 4 in the morning, back he goes. The key here is consistency.

He's probably testing his boundaries. Be consistent (it might take a little while) but he'll eventually settle into the routine.

Oh, and ignore that nonsense about babies who cry it out have problems sleeping later on. We did CIO at 6 months and our son is now over 2 years old and has never regressed. Why? Because we maintained the same expectations and routines all along.

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C.F.

answers from Chicago on

This actually happens alot with babies who cry it out so early.

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K.O.

answers from Chicago on

Hi J.,
It seems as though your little one is reaching out to your for some reason and my advice is to give the comfort that is being requested. I am not an advocate of sleep training, so I wouldn't recommend that. In fact, I have recently come across some studies showing the detrimental effects of letting a baby cry for long periods of time.

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S.P.

answers from Chicago on

I used to be concerned about a similar issue. My daughter would wake up several times in the night, and she used to sleep with us. I did do some research on it and interestingly, young children's sleep cycles are not the same as ours. It's quite normal for them to wake up several times during the night until they're about 5 or 6. It's also normal to have night terrors. There was a time, when my daughter would wake up crying in the middle of the night and I realized it had to do with watching a dvd (elmo, as it happens) in the evening or at night before going to sleep (don't ask! - it had to do with the grandparents being around, etc.) I soon realized the pattern and stopped all dvds during the day and evening. She didn't wake up crying after that. She also cried at night if that day had been very hectic, eventful, too exciting..., etc.

If you're trying to find a reason that he's crying, then speak with the daycare and see how he's been doing during the day - are there any issues? has anything in his routine - daycare or at home - changed? Other than that, i would agree with the other responses, just comfort him and let him fall asleep again in his own bed. Knowing you're there when he needs you will give him the security he's looking for. After I transitioned my daughter to her own bed, she would wake up atleast once or twice a night calling for me (but not crying). I would just go to her until she went back to sleep. It has taken at least 6 to 8 months for her to now sleep through the night consistently (she's 4 1/2 years old).

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M.C.

answers from Chicago on

Yes, you pretty much have to start over and let him cry it out. Realize that you might loose one night's sleep, because since he is in bed, he is free to get up. Explain to him before putting him to bed that sleeping with you is no longer an option, he has to stay in his bed. Then camp outside his door with a book to read or puzzles to do. When he gets up explain to him this one time only that he can't and put him back in bed. Do you close his door at night? if you do this will work more easily. The next time he gets up hold his door shut for a minute or so and tell him to get back in bed. If he does, great. If not, put him back in bed and tell him that you are going to be right out in the hall, but you will hold the door shut if he tries to come out again. Now follow through. He may fall asleep crying on the other side of the door, in which case you can put him back to bed when he is soundly asleep. Stay there, maybe now you can doze off, if he wakes again and tries the door, hold it shut and tell him he has to sleep in his bed. Since he did go to bed for so long, then one night should probably do it. Good luck.

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